The Party Ch. 05

My mind was full of cobwebs as I swung my feet out of my bed. Bent at the waist, I held my head in my hands and then slowly stood up.

I didn't sleep well at all, having to get up and pee which seemed like every hour. I felt bloated and uncomfortable. My legs feeling heavy as I slowly made it to the bathroom.

My eyes were puffy and my cheeks slightly swelled. I looked terrible as my eyes moved up and down at myself through the mirror.

What was happening to me I wondered, squirting some toothpaste onto my brush.

My mind drifted off to what I could faintly remember of the past few days. Scenes and images flipped through my mind rapidly as I robotically brushed my teeth.

I can't do this anymore. This is ridiculous. Look at me. I'm letting them turn me into a woman and I'm accepting it.

My head throbbed as images of me with Buzz shot back and forth in front of my eyes. Blushing at the thought and embarrassment of what we did together.

I rinsed my mouth out and splashed my face with water.

What am I doing and why am I letting them do this to me?

I looked back at myself in the mirror, the water dripping from my wet face.

Why would anyone sane ever agree to getting god dam tits and fucking some old man, even if it is for a lot of money?

I picked up a bottle of cold cream from the counter, almost in habit and started to apply it to my face, thinking that this might take the puffiness away.

I bet it was Pam's stupid happy pills that made me agree to all of this and that medicine they're giving me probably doesn't help either.

I stared at myself and gasped in shock. It's that god dam patch that they keep slapping on my back. It's the medicine that's making me so docile.

My heart fluttered as everything started to make sense to me and that this really wasn't my fault.

I lifted my foot on top of the toilet seat and carefully ran the razor over my leg, looking carefully for any site of hair that might be growing back.

What the hell am I doing? Why am I still caring how I look? I just won't do this anymore. I just won't.

I threw my razor into the sink and marched out of the bathroom and into my room, grabbing my robe that was lying on the chair and slipping it on. My mind was going over everything that has been happening to me.

I'm going to go downstairs right now and tell Pam that it's over and that she might as well tell Buzz that the deal is off. I can't believe how stupid I was to fall for any of this.

The water was running and Pam was humming a mindless tune as I walked into the kitchen. Her back was to me, washing some dishes.

"Pam, it's over. I just don't care anymore, its over." I snarled out, feeling confident for the first time in a long while

Pam calmly reached over and shut the taps off. I could see her slowly wiping her hands dry with the towel cloth.

"Is that how we say good morning Nancy? Let's try that again shall we?" She said with her back still to me.

"I'm not Nancy. I'm Rob. Rob, Rob, Rob. Do you get that?"

I stomped my foot completely frustrated.

"I will not say anything further till you come into this kitchen properly and I'm sure you know what I mean now don't you Nancy." She said still motionless.

I huffed to myself and hesitated for a moment before I turned around and stormed out of the kitchen and then stopping.

Ok, if I have to do this one more time to get her to listen to me then I will. I just don't care; I'm not going to go through this charade anymore.

I took and few deep breaths and tighten the belt on my robe, rethinking what I was going to say.

I slowly walked back into the kitchen composed. Pam was still standing still at the sink.

"Good morning Mrs. Markus." I sheepishly said standing at the entrance of the kitchen.

Pam turned around and smiled.

"Good morning Nancy. Sit down and I'll get you a glass of juice. We should always start our day with some juice.

"Pam, we have to talk." My eyes met with hers. "I decided that I'm not doing this anymore. You call Buzz and tell him. I'm just not going through with this."

I could feel my emotions boiling inside me. I just wanted to scream. Tears came to my eyes.

"Now, now Nancy, tell me all about it. Does it have something to do with the cold cream on your face?" She said guiding me to the kitchen chair by my shoulders and sitting me down.

I completely forgot about the cream on my face. Here I was trying to make a point and I look like a complete idiot.

"You have to put the cream on to keep you skin soft"She said patting my shoulders lovingly.

"It has nothing to do with the cold cream. It's about you guys changing me into a woman for god sakes. I'm I the only one around here that thinks this is wrong? Don't you get it? Think about it."

Pam walked to the refrigerator and took out a pitcher of orange juice.

"I heard you get up last night Nancy. Was anything wrong?"

"Pam, are you not listening?" I paused. "Um, I, just had to go to the washroom"

"That happens sometimes Nancy; I have gotten up in the middle of the night as well. Did you wake up feeling tired and maybe a little bloated? Is that what is bothering you this morning?" Pam said pouring the juice in a glass and bringing it over. "You're not the only girl that wakes up like that honey. We all do."

I took a sip of my juice and then another. It actually felt nice and refreshing going down my throat, Soothing over the roughness of the morning.

"Pam, that's not what I wanted to talk about. It's about this whole thing with me being a girl. This is crazy going through all of this."

I took another drink and watched as Pam wiped the counter with a towel.

"So tell me what you want to talk about honey. We can keep it between us, our little secret girly talks" Pam said turning and smiling. "I really love you Nancy, you're so good for Buzz."

I just shook my head in disbelief. She wasn't hearing a thing I was saying.

"Pam, for the last time, will you listen. I don't want to be a woman." I took my final drink of my juice and sat the glass down. "I'm stopping right now. No more Nancy, no more nothing."

She was still looking at me.

"Oh don't be silly Nancy. You just going through one of your stages again, you'll see, everything is going to be just fine."

Her smile was somewhat reassuring. I felt a deep calming sensation wash through my body as I looked back at her.

"Oh, and by the way, Wendy said you didn't need to wear the patch anymore. I phoned her this morning and told her my concern about that last patch you were wearing and how it seemed to give you too many mood swings."

I picked up my glass and shook a few more drops from the bottom, sticking my tongue out and circling the inside rim of the glass.

Looking up at Pam and then pulling the glass away, being a little embarrassed about my manners.

I blushed and giggled quietly as she smiled at what I just did.

"Anyways, she told me just to give it to you every morning. We can regulate it much better now we know the proper dosage."

"But Pam, I don't want to take any medicine. I feel fine right now."

"Oh will you stop Nancy, you have to take your medicine, and you know that." Pam said turning and putting the last of the dishes away. "That's why I mixed it with your juice this morning Nancy. This way I can regulate it myself without you having to worry about it."

"You put it in my juice? But,"

"You know you feel much better taking it, so I don't know what the problem is Nancy." She turned around facing me again. "Is there a problem?" Pam asked leaning against the kitchen counter, staring at me, daring me to answer her.

I stared blankly at her. She was right, I mean, I did feel better after taking my medicine. It did sort of make sense.

"I, um, I don't have a problem Pam. I'm sorry for causing such a fuss."

I looked down at my empty glass, feeling ashamed of myself for even saying anything.

Pam walked over to me.

"Oh Nancy, you know I wouldn't do anything to hurt you."

I slowly looked up at her with tears in my eyes.

"Everything is going to be just fine Nancy. I keep telling you that."

"I'm sorry Pam. I don't want you to hate me." I cried.

"Oh honey, I don't hate you. Why would you ever think of such a thing? We all love you Nancy." Pam said softly.

I hic-cupped a few sobs as Pam lean down and gave me a hug, lifting me to my feet.

I instantly fell into her crying, my face pressed against her shoulder as she held me close, softly rubbing my back.

"There, there Nancy. Everything is going to be just fine. I promise" She whispered softly in my ear.

I pulled back from her. We both stood there for a second before I sniffled out a laugh.

"I'm the luckiest girl to have such a friend like you." I embarrassly laughed, feeling like a fool for crying.

I'm more then just a friend Nancy." Pam smiled back.

I smiled and let out a big huff of relief.

"I feel so much better Pam. I like it when we have our little talks."

Pam quietly laughed. "I must say, it's hard to take you serious with all that cold cream still on your face Nancy."

I reached up and felt my face. I had completely forgotten about the cream and must have looked completely ridiculous with it still being on. I'm sure Pam could see me blushing through it.

"Why don't I help you get ready? I'll pick out a nice outfit while you freshen up. You don't want to be late for your hair appointment do you?"

"Oh my hair, I almost forgot about getting the rest of my hair done. And you know what Pam, I'm going to buy a necklace that matches my earrings and, and, Oh yes, and shoes, don't forget, I have to get shoes."

I wasn't taking a breath between my words

Pam just shook her head while taking my hand in hers. I heard her giggle quietly as she led me to my bedroom.

"I told Brandy I would be there some time in the morning. Don't you just love these weaves I'm getting Pam? Don't you think I look much better with long hair? I hope Buzz likes it and just doesn't say he does."

Pam directed me to the bathroom by gently pushing me and then giving my butt a little slap.

"I swear you could talk the dead awake Nancy. Now I want you take a hot shower and then come out. I'll have everything laid out on your bed for you."

I playfully yelped as she slapped my butt and purposely bent over, wiggling it at her and then ran off to the bathroom giggling.

I dropped my robe to the floor and stepped in the shower.

This was going to be so much fun going to the mall. I wonder what clothes Pam is going to have me wear. I don't really care that much, all my clothes are beautiful.

My mind was swirling as I soaped up my body and letting the nice flow of water freshen me up.

"Nancy, I have a nice fluffy towel to wrap yourself in when your finish." Pam said standing outside the shower curtain.

"Just give me another minute Pam."

I rinsed off the soap and pour some body wash in my hand, running it all over my body. The perfume scent filled the bathroom as I pulled off my scrunchy, letting my hair fall away and duck my head under the spray.

"Pam, do you think it's ok to wash my hair?"

"Its fine Nancy just let me untangle it after you get out so that Brandy doesn't waste her time doing it."

I pour some nice shampoo in my hand and carefully soaped up my head.

"I'm getting butterflies thinking how I'm going to look with my long hair Pam."

"You will look beautiful with anything you do Nancy. Now come out, you have to get going."

I shut the taps off and opened the curtain. Pam was standing there with the towel held open.

"Oh Nancy, you have grown." Pam said laughing.

I stepped out of the shower.

"What do you mean Pam?"

"Your eyes aren't the only things that swelled last night Nancy. Your boobs look fuller. How do they feel?" Pam said stepping closer and letting go of the towel.

Pam placed her hands under my boobs and gently lifted up as if to weigh them. Her thumbs pushed against my nipples and a small gasp slipped out of my mouth.

"If I didn't know better Nancy, I would think you were ready to nurse." She giggled, tweaking and squeezing each nipple carefully causing me to softly moan.

"I bet they're sensitive. Just look at your areolas." her hands slid over and down the sides of my breast.

My nipples harden and my legs weakened.

"Easy girl" Pam teased. "I see that look in your eyes."

I blushed and pulled back slightly, somewhat ashamed that I was so easily turned on. But she was right, my boobs did feel heavier.

Pam picked up the towel and wrapped it around me, pulling it tight and then tucking it in behind my back.

"Let's get you finished shall we?" Pam said taking my hand and leading me out to the bedroom.

My clothes were neatly laid out on the bed.

"I figure you could wear your black skirt with the pretty white camisole. It will look really nice for your day of shopping Nancy."

I glanced over the clothes happily and picked up my panties, bending slightly and pulling them up my legs.

"Where's my bra Pam? I'm going to need a bra for god sakes. "I said panicking for no reason.

"Relax Nancy; the cami has enough support for what you're doing today."

Pam picked up the cami and showed me the extra ribbing inside the cup for support. She then held it over my head and slipped it over, pulling it down. I adjusted my boobs inside the cups.

"How does that feel Nancy?" Pam said stepping back and looking.

"It feels alright but I feel like I'm so out there."

I placed my hands on top of my breast, measuring how much skin was showing with my fingers.

"You look just fine Nancy. That's the way its suppose to look."

I reached down and picked up my skirt. I could feel my boobs swaying slightly under the light support.

"I just don't want to be the center of attraction at the mall Pam."

I stepped into the skirt and pulled it up my legs and then high around my waist.

"How about you wear that burgundy blouse we picked up for you yesterday? I bet that would look nice and give you a little cover-up as well."

"That would make me feel better Pam."

Pam walked over to the closet and pulled out the blouse as I sat down on the edge of the bed and rolled my nylons up my legs.

"Are you going to be alright going to the mall yourself Nancy? I could always put off my plans and go with you."

"I'll be ok Pam. I'm just going to be at the mall and then coming straight home."

I stood up, straighten and pulled down my skirt a little.

Pam handed me the blouse and I slipped it on, buttoning up the bottom half of the blouse.

"Let me look Nancy." Pam said stepping back.

I slowly turned around as she expertly looked, her fingers adjusting the blouse here and there.

"It looks beautiful Nancy. Let me comb your hair out and then we'll get your make-up on."

Pam took my hand again and led me back to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet seat as she carefully pulled the comb through my hair, tugging tiny knots through the teeth.

"That nice rose color lipstick you have with the rosy hue eye shadow would go lovely with your blouse Nancy."

"I was thinking the same thing Pam, but I just want a little color, nothing to out there."

Pam laughed.

"Feeling a little modest today Nancy?"

"I guess so, I don't know. I'm just glad I'm feeling better then I did this morning."

"I'm glad you're feeling better too Nancy." Pam said putting the comb down and pulling my hair together. "Everything is going to be fine.

She picked up the scrunchy and slipped it around my hair, pulling it tightly into a ponytail.

"Do you want my help with your make-up or are you fine?

"I'll be alright Pam, thanks anyways."

"I'll meet you in the living room after you finish then"

"Thanks Pam. I won't be too long."

I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror, analyzing how I looked, my eyes darting up and down.

I applied the rose eyeshadow very lightly and smiled how it matched the earrings. A tiny amount of mascara was just to brighten up my eyes and then my lipstick to make my lips kissable.

I giggled at my thoughts and blew a kiss at myself in the mirror.

I slipped my heels on and then picked up my purse. I took one last look at myself in the mirror, was happy with what I saw and then walked to the living room.

"So are you all ready to go Nancy?" Pam said walking up to me.

"I'm all ready. How do I look?"

"You look lovely but I'm still worried about you going to the mall yourself. Are you sure your going to alright?"

"I'll be fine Pam, um,,,do you think you could drive me to the mall and then I'll take the bus or a taxi home."

"I would definitely feel a lot better if I did drive you honey. Wait for me in the car and I'll be right out." Pam happily said.

"I love you Pam."

My eyes swelled with tears as I walked to the car. Pam is so good to me. I just can't believe how lucky I am.

I fidgeted with hands as I sat waiting, I was so anxious to get going.

Maybe I should phone Buzz, just to say good morning or something. I bet he would like that.

I quickly opened my purse and pushed aside all my make-up and things till I felt my phone and pulled it out.

I hope Jessica doesn't answer it. She always makes some sort of snide remark about something. I wished she didn't work there with Buzz.

I flipped my phone open.

Huh, someone sent me a text. Maybe Buzz sent me one this morning.

My heart fluttered thinking of how nice it would be for Buzz to show me how much he cared by texting me.

"Coffee?" is what the text said. I sat thinking for a second.

What coffee? Coffee with who?

I deleted the message and thought again as Pam walked out of the house and towards the car. I dropped the phone back in my purse and snapped it closed.

"Who were you talking to? Was that Buzz?" Pam said while getting into the car.

"Um, no, I was, um, thinking of phoning him but he's probably too busy."

My mind wandered as I tried to think who would have text me. Maybe it was Buzz but where would I meet him? what coffee shop?

Pam started up the car and started to drive out.

"Go ahead Nancy. Buzz would love to here from you."

I blushed slightly.

"No, I'll phone him later, after I get my hair done.

"Ok, it's up to you, but don't ever think that Buzz wouldn't like to hear from you anytime of the day." Pam said patting my leg.

"I know Pam, I know." I smiled.

We drove for a bit and then pulled into the mall. Pam drove around and up to the front doors.

"If you have any problems Nancy, just phone. I'll be back at home in a few hours."

"Thanks Pam, but I'm sure everything is going to be just fine."

We both lean over and kiss each other on the cheek.

I opened the door and got out, looking back at Pam and giving her a little girl squeal of happiness.

Shutting the door, I could see Pam shaking her head at me and smiling as she put the car into drive, leaving me standing at the entrance. I took a deep confident breath and turned around to face the big mall doors.

As I came up to the doors, a couple of young guys, maybe mall night workers smiled and held the door open for me. I gave them a slight smile and a thank-you. They both stood quietly as I walked past them, their eyes devouring me. I kept my eyes straight as not to notice but loved the attention.

It was still early and some of the stores were just starting to open. My eyes scanned the store fronts as I made my way to the beauty salon.

I suddenly stopped in my tracks.

It was the most beautiful wedding gown in the world displayed in the window. Off the shoulder with a bellowing flow of pure white satin and lace. It was something I dreamt about all my life.

"Thinking of the big day Nancy?"

I fluttered my eyes as I woke from my dreamy fantasy of wearing the dress.

I turned and blushed seeing James standing there.