tagErotic CouplingsThe Perfect Gift

The Perfect Gift

byKingOfBedsideManner©

Chaz was finishing things up in the local cable control room that evening. With Christmas Eve came a short staff, and with it the ability to slip into places that an intern wasn’t supposed to be. He picked up the telephone, punched the number he knew now by memory and it took less than three rings to pick up. I wonder if she was waiting around for me, he thought.

“Hey babe,” he said, not giving her time to answer. He could hear the television in the background. Good. “I’m heading out now. Why don’t you warm me a seat by the fireplace so we can wait up for Old Saint Nick.” Then as if an afterthought continued, “And this Christmas special is on channel 213 I want you to check out.”

Chaz could hear her change the station. With the stock market closed, he doubted any one would miss the station for the night. He was pulling an early shift tomorrow, so he’d be able to put things back before anyone was the wiser. In the meantime anyone who was watching channel 213 would be getting something a little bit different that evening.

The words back from the other end of the receiver were brief: “Chaz,” she sighed. “You know I hate watching these Christmas specials alone,” he heard her giggle.

That’s all it took for Chaz to put the end of his work day in motion: Out of the control room, down the hall, saying good night to Bernie, and through the front door. Checking his coat pocket for Julia’s Christmas present, a red pair of panties with a silver bell attached, Chaz thought about the irony of giving the gift of panties to a girl who never wore them. He thought about the crime of her watching television all by herself on Christmas Eve, and shut his car door knowing that he’d be ringing her doorbell before the show got really rocking.

*****

Somewhere in the North Pole Santa was reviewing his last list of the season. The final preparations for Christmas were well underway with the elves scurrying to and fro. He just had to review this final list before he started on his way.

He had already gone through the millions of children on the naughty and nice lists, making sure children with common names were separated accordingly. The only time he got that wrong was in the seventies. It was the last time he got milk and cookies in the Smith household. Those delicious brownies that Mrs. Smith would put out, he’d take back with him to the North Pole. The whole batch would get him through those dreary months in between Christmas. But when little Bobby Smith got a stocking stuffed with coal, when really the Bobby Smith six blocks down on Clancy was supposed to get that coal, well that would be the last time old Santa was ever welcomed in the Smith house. Now he always checked his lists thrice to make sure an error like that never happened again.

The “Way Too Good” List was always filled with just a handful of people. Mostly those kids that wanted that nice car they saw in a James Bond movie. Being that good however, who was Santa to say “no”? It was Lisa that Santa was unsure about. The 28 year old woman, with a body that had “naughty” written all over it, deserved something extra special. Claus thought about it for a moment, letting his mind wander into some naughty places that even Mrs. Claus shouldn’t know about. But there was no time for day dreams now. Santa had a job to do. He showed the list to Mrs. Claus asking what gift would be good for Lisa. Santa hoped she knew what to do.

*****

The door creaked open lighting the darkness of the apartment. The blinking bulbs on the little-too-large Christmas tree at the far end of the apartment always brought a smile to Lisa’s face every time she opened the door. How that one guy was willing to carry that tree down twelve blocks and up five floors, she still couldn’t figure out. The guy was sweet, leaving her his business card, but she was married and a good wife. With Robert being overseas and unsure when he would be home, she felt lonely. She removed her coat, throwing her pumps into the corner, and sighed thinking of the last time she had been with her husband. It was over a year ago. She had been way too good since then she thought.

*****

Santa’s sleigh took off on schedule. It was pretty unusual for Santa to have to pick up a present along the way. But that Mrs. Claus could always solve any problem.

*****

Christmas Eve was always a good day to get caught up on paper work for the investment firm that Lisa worked for. Even though it was going to be a casual day, Lisa fell into old habits and came into work wearing her business suit. Throwing a frozen dinner into the oven she began to unbutton her blouse as she walked towards the bedroom. On her way, she turned on the television to the financial network she always watched.

Lisa liked having noise in the apartment, and keeping the television on made her feel not quite so alone. Besides she liked to keep up on the business news, though she wondered how much news there would really be today. Her blouse fell to the floor as she walked into the bathroom to finish disrobing. A warm shower sounded nice right now.

*****

Julia’s present was also somewhere on the floor at that moment. The Christmas special had its intended effect. The last scene Chaz and Julia saw was the husband waking up Christmas morning to find his wife’s present for him was having another woman join them in bed. Julia was overshadowing the threesome on the screen as she took Chaz’s cock in her mouth. Bobbing her head slightly, she wrapped a small hand around his shaft. It felt cold at first but things quickly warmed up as her lips continued to move up and down his length. As Julia interchanged sucking and stroking, Chaz closed his eyes and listened to the sounds of the threesome happening on the television.

*****

It was right in the middle of washing her hair, that Lisa thought she heard a woman moaning. “What is going on with the television?” she thought. The moaning persisted with more urgency as she continued to wash herself. It sounded like multiple people too. It was then that she felt she was going to die if anyone walking past her door could hear what she had on. Her first thought was to run out and quickly shut off the television, but being that it was on the other side of the apartment and she would be all wet, she decided to finish quickly washing as she grabbed some soap and a cloth.

Lisa realized the moans of pleasure were getting louder as she ran the wash cloth over her chest. She began to listen to the sounds of pleasure imagining they were her own. Her hands lingered over her breasts, feeling her nipples harden as the wash cloth ran over them. She could feel every drop of water from the shower jet cascade over her body. With the wash cloth put to the side, Lisa’s caught each of her nipples flat in her palms as she kneaded both breasts eliciting a moan, though she was unsure if it was from her or the television. She could feel her fingernails press into her skin as her arousal continued to grow. A hand slid over her flat tummy and began to work its way lower when a loud buzzing overtook the sound from the television jarring Lisa. The oven timer had gone off and the buzzer wouldn’t stop unless she shut it off herself. With the mood ruined, Lisa shut off the shower and grabbed a towel.

*****

Thousands of miles away from Lisa, Santa continued on his trip. He hoped he would find Lisa’s present right where Mrs. Claus had told him. The reindeers danced through the night’s sky. It would be theirs for the entire night.

*****

Lisa was mad. By the time she got out of the shower, grabbed her robe, and shut off the oven her dinner was already ruined. Angry that she let herself succumb to the sounds of the television she turned it off eliciting a few choice words about the whole matter. With the dinner burnt and nothing in the apartment, she threw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt and slammed the door behind her off to find some food.

Lisa began to walk in the city’s cold overcast night. They weren’t calling for snow, but you could feel it in the air as she zipped up her jacket further. Much as she put it out of her mind, she wandered back to the scenes she saw and heard on the television. She had watched porn before, but that was back in college. Soon after she was graduated and married, and she was having plenty of fun in the bedroom with her husband. With him going overseas for the past year however, her sex life had really suffered. It wasn’t fair that the government would need him to go away that long. And the fact that it was a secret and she didn’t know where he was or couldn’t travel to see him made it that much worse. She thought about his touch, the porn, and imagined it was them on the screen. Her nipples hardened, but she thought it might be because of the cold.

Lisa realized where she was walking to as she rounded the block.

*****

Agent Smith couldn’t sleep. The bed he slept on creaked with every movement he made. It was Christmas, and he wanted to be anyplace but here. There were only a few people who could do this job however, and he was one of them. It was almost over, he was just waiting for his flight home which left in a few days and he would be able to see Lisa. He kept tracing over every inch of her body in his mind as he flipped on the lamp light, and fished out a small picture he had of her in his wallet. The government promised him he wouldn’t have to go away for a long, long time after this was all over. If the weather held for his airplane connections, and the debrief goes smoothly on his return, he would be able to see Lisa by New Years. He wondered what his precious wife was doing right now.

*****

The door to Murray’s Late Night Adult Sex Shoppe opened tentatively, and Lisa walked in. A place she had passed many times in the city, she never thought once about going there until tonight. It was time for her to give herself a little Christmas present.

*****

It was a fairly busy night, Pablo thought at the counter. Business was steady. He guessed with not many places open the night before Christmas it was an opportunity to get that last minute gift that you had forgot to buy. He was thinking what would be a suitable gift for his grandmother when a lady walked in. She was much better looking than the pleasant old lady wandering around in the back.

*****

Lisa looked around and caught the college kid at the counter staring at her. Her legs didn’t know which way to walk. Part of her thought about leaving as she watched a customer went through video tape boxes. From the back it looked like Max from her office. Was it? She panicked as she took a step towards the door, but as the man turned around to survey another shelf of videos, Lisa realized it wasn’t and let out a silent sigh of relief. If someone from work caught her in... but she broke off that thought as her eyes began to wander down the aisles. She was looking for something but wasn’t sure what.

“Can I help you?” came a voice from the counter. Lisa turned, blushing. Her eyes drifted away. She didn’t know what to tell the guy. She wanted to tell him that she needed to find something that would help her release all this sexual excitement building inside of her. Ever since she heard the television in the shower she realized she needed to be touched, to release the sexual heat building in her body. She was horny and her eyes passing over the pictures on the videotape boxes weren’t helping matters any.

The problem Lisa realized was that she didn’t know what she wanted. She looked over the employee for a fleeting second, and imagined him helping her with his problem, but she was a good wife and would never do something like that. How much time had passed since he asked me, she wondered.

“I’m just looking around,” Lisa finally managed to say. Now if only her feet could choose an aisle to walk down.

*****

Agent Smith was still looking at his wife’s picture when out on the lawn there arose such a clatter. Smith sprung from the bed to see what was the matter.

*****

Lisa was busy eyeballing the books and magazines in the far aisle of the store. She shook her head quietly in disbelief after seeing the some of the women on the magazine covers. Their breasts were huge! All she could think about was how much back pain fake breasts cause. She was glad hers were all natural. She loved it when her husband lavished attention all over them. She picked up a book with a man doing just that to a woman on the front cover and thought that would make a better read that her latest Cosmo tonight.

Her feet continued to move down the aisle she had to herself. Something bright and shiny caught her attention out of the corner of her eye. She found what she was going to get herself that night.

*****

Agent Smith grabbed his gun and cracked open the window shade peering outside. A bunch of reindeers stood grazing. His vision tracked the reindeers to the sleigh they were pulling. There was a little old driver in it.

*****

Santa double checked the address the Misses gave him. This was the place. It was always hard keeping up with change of addresses and Mrs. Claus always took care of it. She always made sure that there was nary a boy or a girl who moved which Santa couldn’t bring presents to.

Realizing he was on a tight schedule Santa hurried to the door.

*****

“You know dearie, I don’t know how I would have been able to get by on some nights without the one I had,” the old lady said startling Lisa. She was still tense about being in such a place, but now she became transfixed on the vibrator on the shelf.

“I’ve never had one before,” Lisa revealed to this total stranger. She wondered if it already included batteries. Then realizing that she had plenty of spare batteries at home, began to wonder how much of the eight inches she would be able to slide inside of her. Her husband was nice but not that large.

“Oh they make the perfect companion when your husband is away,” the old lady told Lisa solidifying the purchase in Lisa’s mind. “My husband only travels once a year, but there are other times when he gets so caught up in his work, that he doesn’t come to bed for months on end.”

Lisa smiled at the lady who was carrying a handful of videos. “Thanks,” she told her.

“And try this cream,” the lady added, handing it to Lisa as they headed to the counter. “It’s unreal.”

*****

Agent Smith saw the large man move swiftly to the door. He ran as if he was floating on air. If he was a bad guy, he made himself a huge target running around wearing that red and white outfit, Smith thought. He holstered the gun, watching the man fly up the steps to the door. Smith wouldn’t give him the opportunity to knock as he opened the door and pulled the man inside.

*****

The old lady let Lisa go first when they got to the counter. When the register finished ringing up her two items, the old lady told Pablo, “I’ll pay for that.”

Lisa turned around to the stranger thanking her in puzzlement.

“Santa’s elves certainly don’t make those kinds of presents,” the old lady laughed, “and you deserve a great Christmas honey.”

Lisa took the brown paper bag the man behind counter put her items in and walked out of the store. She wasn’t even thinking about dinner as she headed briskly home, leaving the door to the shop to slowly swing shut allowing a cold chill to enter. It felt at home here, the old lady thought, as Pablo rang up her movies. It was so hard to get her husband presents for Christmas since he was always working at home. Resorting to have to sneak out last minute was a tradition for her. Lucky that Murray’s was always open.

“Is this going to be cash or charge Mrs. C?” Pablo asked her. Light snow fell from the sky.

*****

It didn’t take long for Lisa to make it back to the apartment. She sat herself down on her bed and emptied the contents of the bag on the sheets in front of her. Her eyes looked over the description on the back of the package. Lisa was always the type of person who read the instructions first. As she examined the box and opened its contents she absently began to stroke her inner thigh through her jeans. The silver eight inch classic vibrator (“with curved tip!” the box emphasized) was said to be an essential for any sex toy collection and perfect for the first-timers. Lisa surveyed the vibrator up and down in her hand, looking over every inch of it. Her hands found the controls and she switched it on.

*****

“Agent Robert Smith?” Santa Claus asked. He could see the perplexed look on the man’s face, and with a gun on the counter within the man’s reach, Santa thought he should take things nice and slow. The reindeers could use the rest.

“Who the hell are you?” questioned Smith, knowing that he knew the answer, but not wanting to believe it.

Santa saw the look of bewilderment on the man’s face. It wasn’t the first time he had seen it though the children were willing to believe in him quicker than a skeptical adult ever did. “I’m Santa Claus,” he said smiling, his droll little mouth drawn up like a bow.

The man took another moment to take it all in. “If you are really Old Saint Nick, why the hell did you leave me a lump of coal in my stocking when I was seven?”

Uh-oh, thought Santa.

*****

The buzzing of the vibrator was hypnotic to Lisa. As her fingertips traced along the vibrator’s length, she could feel her nipples harden underneath her sweatshirt. It was if the current of sexual energy the vibrator was unleashing was traveling throughout her body. She tossed off her shirt and then unclasped her bra, wanting to feel the touch of the toy on her bare skin. With the shirt and bra both lying on the floor, she lightly brought the tip around to the outside of her breast. Lisa watched as her nipples jutted outward aching to be fondled as she circled around them, until giving in pressing the vibe flush against them eliciting a deep moan.

She could feel her panties become moist as she let the vibrator wander downward over her clothed thighs. While she did that, she took a finger from her free hand and began to suck on it between her lips. She rubbed her wet finger over her sensitive nipples leaving the vibrator buzzing against her legs with its current running directly to her pussy. With need, she caught her slippery nipple between her fingers giving it a little pull and then reached down to undo the button of her jeans.

*****

Santa stuttered realizing who Agent Robert Smith really was as he continued on. “I gave up on Christmas after that year. My brothers and sisters all laughed at me for getting a single piece of coal that year. I hated Christmas!” This sending the stump of Santa’s pipe he held tight in his teeth falling to the floor.

Santa looked at Smith. He still saw him as little Bobby. Had Mrs. Claus known about this? The candy cane that Santa kept in his coat’s pocket for a child who stayed up way past his bedtime wouldn’t be enough to win over Bobby that was for sure. He went with the direct approach.

“Bobby, er, Robert,” Santa began, “what happened back when you were seven was all my fault. That lump of coal you got in your stocking was meant for the other Bobby Smith in your neighborhood. Not you. I wanted to make amends the next year, but your mother shut the flu to the fireplace. That wouldn’t have deterred me except for the fact she glued nails to that closed flu. I so missed your Mother’s brownies too.”

At that moment, the anger and hatred on the face of Robert “Bobby” Smith began to fade. In fact laughter soon overtook Bobby leaving Santa wondering what he said that was so funny. Subconsciously Santa laughed like a bowlful of jelly hoping he would be let in on the joke.

“Santa,” Bobby told him. “You know my Mom put LSD in those brownies?”

Santa continued to laugh, “Why no, no I did not.”

With that, Santa quickly got down to business.

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