The Perks of Being Me

I've known my Wife for years, and find her terribly sexy. Turned on by her movements and her mannerisms, I'm constantly at odds with myself not to trample her with my desires.

Point of fact, I'm usually rejected. Maybe it's the way I come on to her, or maybe there's a deeper more physiological problem. She knows it bothers me, and I know it bothers her. But, at the end of the night, I still find myself sneaking out to the computer to relieve my tension.

It's the tease, and I hope she doesn't do it purposefully. Three or four times a day I recognize how aroused I am. On a good day, I'll be alone for long enough to take care of my urges.

I usually fuel the fire with images of large voluptuous women. I've seen what the internet has to offer, and I'm not easily offended, I just happen to know what I like. Heavy-set, jolly Women really turn me on. My motto has always been that the more curves a woman has the more she can curl her smile. And, if that smile can wrap itself around my member, I'd be happy to help another pair of lips pucker up.

I keep myself trimmed, but not shaven. I love the feel of how soft my pubic hair can get. When I do have the chance, I cherish how my hair meshes with Hers. Especially when I'm deep inside, I'll grind a little harder knowing that the hair in between is getting damper and juicier.

Taking the long stroke out, like an oarsman with good rhythm, I'll thrust right back in. With her legs wrapped around my back, and her plump thighs squeezing my sides tight, I'll take the time to rotate my hips. I'll take the time to feel the shared space I'm in.

I try to change speeds every now and then. However, if I don't start slow and end fast, I won't last very long. Why lie about that? As a Man I like to think I can last for as long as I'm needed, if not longer. But, I know She knows how to get me off quick if she just slows down in the middle of the session.

I really like it when she demands I go quicker, and instead I tease her. I'll go slower. Then I'll realize just how sensitive I can get, and jizz.

When I'm by myself, I know just how long, how hard, and fast, or slow to go. I can control myself for hours, instead of tens of minutes. When I'm with Her, I'll be really lucky if I can get three or four turns around the merry-go-round. When I'm with myself, I don't have to worry about such things. I can tease and touch myself for hours and finally ejaculate all of my pent up tension, when I want.

It's selfish, I know. There's something to be said about knowing your own limits, your own needs. Like just how much of my finger I can put in my asshole, before I get turned off. How sensitive my testicles get if I pull on them too hard. I don't have to say aloud the things I need, because my hands have already explored those questions, and have become quite adept to knowing what the best fit is.

It took me many years to understand and to be comfortable with the exact things I like. So I find peace in knowing that it'll take just as long for me to learn the geography my Wife has to offer.

Sometimes, when I feel like I need an extra bit of comfort I'll seek images of men grasping at their giant hard-ons. I'll fantasize that we're sitting across from each other. Sometimes I'll let my hands do what they truly want to do, and slide my pinky into the crevice of my bum. I'll feel myself pucker and flirt with my finger. I'll circle the hole, and tease it, allowing time for it to relax and open a little.

When it does open, I know not to be eager. I'll slow down, slide gently in a bit, and rush to pull back out. I imagine that would be how a man would take me if I ever let that happen. What's better is if I imagine my wife taking me with a strap-on. There's a trust there, and that's what turns me on the most. The safety amongst the vulnerability.

If I have a good long while, like a whole afternoon to myself, I'll prepare in advance. If I know the laundry is to be done soon, I'll lay a towel out. Sit down on it, and ravage myself with two or three fingers. I have no illusions that what I do isn't as pretty to look at as the porn I watch, but if I close my eyes just enough it matters not.

I'll wind myself up with the raunchiest of thoughts, my mind tends toward words on a page rather than blatant images, but who has time to keep their eyes open in the middle of an orgasm, so I like to hear the moans and groans of men and women in an orgy. That's what earphones are for.

I try to entice all of my senses. I try to get my hair to stand on end. And, when I'm not by myself I try twice as hard for Her.