tagHumor & SatireThe Rape of the Song Titles

The Rape of the Song Titles


Dedicated to destinie21, for giving me the idea for this story.

After just Another Day In Paradise, at Tom's Diner, where Nothing But Mammals would come, to eat some Milk And Toast And Honey, I was on My Way, Home For Christmas, when I heard someone scream "Help!"

I immediately knew that there was Something Going On, and I thought to myself:

"Should I Stay Or Should I Go?"

The D.E.V.I.L. on my left shoulder said:

"Hit The Road, Jack! That sounds like Nothing But Trouble!",

but the Angel on my right shoulder said:

"Stay! This is your chance to be a Hero."

So I walked around the corner, and saw a group of Bad Boys stand over The Most Beautiful Girl In The World, with their dicks out.

"My, Oh My," I thought. "Everybody's Got A Shotgun!"

"Come on, bitch!" said one guy. "Eat It!"

"No!" she said.

"Don't You Want Me, Baby?" he said.

"I Believe" that the Lady In Red said no," I said.

They turned around and stared at me.

"Ain't Nobody's Business!" said another guy.

"Who Let The Dogs Out?" I said, thinking that if I could make them chase me, the girl might be able to escape.

"Who're you calling a dog, you Crazy sonofabitch?" said the biggest of the guys, and they started walking towards me.

I walked backwards, thinking I might get the crap beat out of me if I didn't run fast enough - ah, well, that's me. I Will Do Anything For Love.

"Hey, we don't need this Pretty Woman - that Dude Looks Like A Lady," a short guy pointed out.

I realized that they were going to Take A Chance On Me, so I turned and ran, but they caught up with me. They tore my pants off me, and got me down on all four.

"What's your name?" said the short guy.

"Mickey," I squeaked.

"I'm gonna make you Whoof Like A Dog!" said the big guy, and pressed his big dick against The Rose, until it gave in, and I felt the giant tool being pressed inside a hole that was much too small for it.

I screamed out loud, and they laughed at me.

"Mmmm, I Like To Move It, Move It! said the big guy.

"It hurts!" I screamed. "Please!"

It sounded Like A Prayer. He pulled out, and moved my asscheeks apart. I felt something soft and wet against my aching asshole, and realized that he was licking me.

"How Many Licks do you think he needs?" said the short guy, who was already stroking his hard dick in front of me.

"That will do," said the big guy, and pushed his Joy Toy back inside my ass.

And for the next hour and a half, they made me Justify My Love, they made me Twist And Shout, they made me Cry.

"Awww, come on!" said the short guy, who was pounding me hard. "Big Boys Don't Cry".

And then, I don't know what happened, but I think his dick hit my G-spot, because suddenly it felt really, really good, and I moaned instead of screaming. This made them laugh even more. All of a sudden, I didn't care that they were guys, like me. The only thing that matter, was to get Satisfaction.

"He's Pretty Fly For A White Guy!" said the big guy.

"So, You Like It Like That?" said a tall, thin guy.

"Please, Gimme, Gimme, Gimme!" I cried out.

"That's right, boy!" said the short guy. "Ride The Bullet!"

"Come, on, man!" said the tall, thin guy. "It's my turn to get Lucky!"

The short guy moved over to my face, and told me to suck on it. I obeyed. I was afraid that he was going to beat me up if I didn't. The tall thin guy got behind me. He shoved his dick in. It wasn't very big, but very long. I felt it hit against my bottom, and I groaned.

"Yeah, bitch!" he said, and slapped my butt with his flat hand. "Scream for me!"

"Oh, yeah!" I cried. "Hit Me, Baby, One More Time!"

He slapped me again, and pounded me from behind, and the short guy took hold of my head, and fucked my mouth. The big guy jerked off. My asshole was twice the size when My Army Of Lovers were done with me. The tall, thin guy shot his load up my ass, the big guy sprayed my face, and the short guy filled my throat with man-milk. They zipped up their pants and left me laying there, so worn out and tired that I felt as if I was Knocking On Heaven's Door.

"Man! I Feel Like A Woman!" I thought to myself.

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