The Road Not Taken

Jennifer Sutherland stared out the kitchen window as she took another sip of her morning coffee. Mentally, she made a note to call the lawn service to trim the grass out by the back fence. The paper was calling for rain this afternoon but looking at the clear morning sky she thought they were wrong once again.

"I guess she's not coming this morning." the 38 year old brunette said to herself as she placed her now empty coffee cup down on the table.

"She" was Sally Yee, the 25 year old emergency room nurse who had rented the basement apartment for the last few months. Jennifer and Sally usually had coffee every Friday but this morning she'd found a note saying she'd been called into work late last night and might not be able to make it. Still, Jennifer had come to enjoy their weekly chats so much that she had hoped Sally could still make it.

Rinsing out the cup in the sink, Jennifer remembered that at first she'd been reluctant to rent out the tiny basement apartment. They'd converted the small room into living space when they'd first bought the house fifteen years ago so that her widowed mother could live with them. She had passed away six years ago and her oldest son Chris had inherited the apartment. Then Chris went away to college a year and a half ago and his brother Bill took it over.

Eight months ago, right after his 18th birthday, Bill had enlisted in the Navy, deciding that it was a good way to spend a few years while he decided what he wanted to do with his life. It wasn't a bad decision but it had left Jennifer with an empty house.

It had been both a new and very strange feeling to the mother of two. A little over 20 years ago, Jennifer had gone right from her father's house to her husbands. It wasn't how she planned it though. Originally there had been plans for college, maybe a career. And if she was totally honest with herself, she wasn't 100% certain that her future plans involved Jack Sutherland. But what was that phrase from the song, "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans."

"Oh it happened all right." Jennifer said to herself as she stepped out onto the kitchen porch. "Did it ever."

Her thoughts drifted back to the night some six weeks after the senior prom when she became all too aware of two of life's harsh realities. The first was the fine print on the side of a box of condoms, not that she ever read it, which stated that while effective, any form of birth control was only 99% or so. The other truth was the fact that yes, you can lose your virginity and get pregnant at the same time.

It could've been worse. She and Jack had already graduated High School and he had already gone to work at his father's hardware store. Two decades later, Jack Sutherland had taken over from his father and owned four hardware stores in four different towns.

If only their personal life had been so successful. At 18 they'd been very much in love, but as they grew older, it became very apparent that they had matured in opposite directions. Jack had immersed himself in the business and Jennifer in her sons. The only problem was that while Jack still had the business, looking forward to the day when Chris got his degree and followed in his footsteps, Jennifer now had a big void in her life.

A void that was becoming filled more and more with the what-ifs of her life. What if she'd gone to college? What if she'd been married to someone other than Jack? What if she simply led an adventurous life, leaving behind a trail of lovers. It wasn't too late to pick up the loose threads of her life and start anew, but she found that she lacked the spark to rekindle her fires.

"Morning Jennifer." called out a soft quiet voice as its owner walked up the driveway.

"Hi Sally!" Jennifer called out, her mood improving immediately.

"Sorry I couldn't make it this morning." Sally said as she climbed the steps up to the porch "But I didn't finish my shift until 2 A.M. and decided to crash on one of the couches in the lounge rather than drive home tired."

"That was a good idea." Jennifer agreed. "Can you sit for a while or are you on your way out the door again?"

"Well I was going to run a few errands, but I guess they can wait." the black haired woman said as she dropped into one of the large cushioned wicker chairs that filled the porch.

"Great." Jennifer said with a smile as she settled into her own chair.

Sally Yee was a few inches taller than Jennifer's 5'6" with a round pleasant face that made her seem even younger than her 25 years. Long straight black hair was tied up into the bun she wore while working. Hair that stretched down to her waist when undone. Sally had a slim but well developed build. A tight waist and taut stomach supported small round breasts that were firm enough not to need additional support. At least Jennifer had never noticed Sally wear a bra, even when she only sported a T-shirt.

Jennifer, on the other hand, had full bodied breasts which had developed early and caused her to have to start wearing a bra long before most of the girls in her class. They had almost been too large for her to make the cheerleader squad in high school.

Mrs. Johnston, the faculty advisor, had felt that Jennifer stood out too much from the other less endowed girls and caused too much of a distraction when she wore the short and tight cheerleader outfits. It took a petition of over a hundred signatures, almost all belonging to boys, to make the principal overrule Mrs. Johnston. The petition said it was a matter of upholding Jennifer's rights, but no one really believed it was anything other then a lot of horny young men's desire to see Jenn doing splits in the red and white cheerleader's uniform.

"So how was your night?" Jennifer asked, always interested in the interesting life Sally led.

As the young Asian woman told the tale of the injuries to some police and firemen battling a four-alarm over by the edge of town, Jennifer thought about how much she liked having Sally around.

Despite the difference in their age and backgrounds, the two women had found enough in common to become friends. Jennifer had been amazed to discover that Sally had gotten married even younger than she had. At 17, her family had pressured her into marriage with an older man. The union had lasted less than 2 years and Sally had found herself divorced at 19.

Her family, being very old world, had never forgiven her for what they perceived as an insult to their family honor. Sally hadn't told her exactly why she'd left her husband but it was obvious from the way she talked about their brief marriage that she had never loved him from the start. In Jennifer's case, at least she could say that at least in the early years, her case had been different.

So at 19, disowned by her family, Sally had stopped using the name her family had given her, Yee Sau-ling, and had gone back to school for her nursing degree. Totally immersing herself in her goal, she had crammed a normal course of study into less than 3 years.

Currently, she worked at Metropolitan Hospital only a few blocks away. She had been overjoyed to find an apartment so close that she could walk back and forth to work.

As Sally finished her story, Jennifer remembered something she wanted to ask her younger friend.

"We're having a barbecue Sunday night." Jennifer said. "I was wondering if you could come?"

"Well, I'll have to check my schedule." Sally replied. "I'm on call this weekend."

"I hope you can." Jennifer said. "Jack's cousin Michael is coming over and I really think you'd like him. He's a paramedic so you should have something in common already."

Sally didn't immediately respond but the look on her face told Jennifer that she wasn't exactly excited by the prospect of meeting Jennifer's relative.

"Jenn..I..." she began.

"No, you don't have to say it." Jennifer cut her off. "I guess I should have asked you first."

"Well...it might've been a good idea." Sally replied.

"It never occurred to me that you might not be interested." Jenn continued. "I should've considered the idea that you might not want to date non-Asian men. I mean the fact that I've never even heard you mention one should've been a clue."

Sally seemed to be considering something for a few moments as her eyes took on a far-away stare. It lasted only a few brief seconds but when her attention returned it was clear that she had something to say.

"Jenn, I need to tell you something." she began. "I really wasn't planning on bringing this up but I once made myself a promise not to lie to myself or other people for that matter."

"I'm all ears." Jennifer laughed.

"It's not that I don't date non-Asian men." Sally said in a calm, even tone. "I don't date men, period."

"Sally, I know you had a bad marriage." Jennifer quickly replied. "But that's no reason to shut yourself out from relationships. I'm sure that there are plenty of men that..."

"You don't understand." Sally cut her off. "I don't have relationships with men. Jennifer, I'm a lesbian."

For the first time since she'd met Sally, Jennifer was speechless.

"I really hadn't planned on telling you that." Sally went on. "But I think if I didn't, you'd be going out of your way to match me up with every unmarried Chinese man in town."

"I never would've guessed." Jennifer finally said. "I mean, I don't know what to say. Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure." Sally grinned. "This isn't something that I just decided you know. I've known it since I was 13 years old. It soon became obvious to my parents as well. That's why they were so quick to marry me off. I lived a lie every night for two years until I couldn't do it anymore. That's when I promised myself that I'd never lie to myself again - whatever the cost. I don't wear a sign around my neck, but I don't try to hide it either."

"I can't imagine having that much courage." Jennifer said, a touch of admiration in her voice. "To walk away from everything in your life and start over."

"It wasn't easy." Sally admitted. "But every new life begins with a single step, eventually the steps become easier as you build on your life a little at a time."

A silent pause hung in the air. It took Jennifer a long minute to understand what Sally had told her.

"I hope this won't make a difference in our friendship." Sally said, breaking the silence.

"A difference?" Jennifer repeated.

"Well, some women have a hard time dealing with lesbianism." Sally went on. "They tend to ignore every other thing about you and just assign some stereotype image."

"What kind of image?" Jennifer asked, genuinely curious.

"Well that you spend your days trying to seduce lonely housewives away from their husbands." Sally explained. "Or when you're not doing that, you're trying to recruit your daughters into some secret society."

"Well are you?" Jenn asked in mock seriousness.

"When I was a lot younger, I wished there was some kind of secret society." Sally said. "Somewhere I could go to talk to someone. You have no idea what it's like to grow up a lesbian teen, and a Chinese lesbian teen on top of that. Imagine having your own parents look down on you as some kind of abomination."

Jennifer thought for a moment of her own parents reaction when she had told them she was pregnant. Her father had been angry enough that night to call her a slut. But in the end they had calmed down and there had been socially acceptable solutions to her predicament. Marriage that early in her life might not be ideal, but at least Jack had a future with his father's company and it would give the baby a name. In fact, since both her mother and mother-in-law were quick to spread the story that Chris was premature, few people knew she had walked down the aisle pregnant.

"No, I can't imagine what it must've been like." Jennifer responded. "But you don't have to worry about our friendship. This isn't going to affect it."

"Are you sure?" Sally asked again.

"I'm positive." Jennifer repeated. "I don't believe in judging someone based on who they share their bed with. After all, look who sleeps on the other side of my bed." she laughingly added.

"I've always thought Mr. Sutherland was a nice guy." Sally noted.

"Oh he is, I'm only kidding." Jennifer replied. "But while we're on the subject, I don't think this is the kind of thing you should mention to him. I hope you're okay with that because I'm really not sure what kind of reaction he would have."

"It's okay." Sally agreed. "As hard as the subject is for some women to come to grips with, it's even harder for an even greater number of men."

"Good." Jennifer said, letting out a deep breath.

"I'd really better get started on those errands." Sally noted as she looked at her watch and began to rise from her seat.

"Please try and come to the barbecue." Sally said. "I'm sure you'll have a good time anyway."

"I'll try." Sally said as she stepped off the porch and waved good-bye.

Sally did come to the barbecue and she had a great time. In fact everyone had a lot of fun. One thing bothered Jennifer though. When the two women were changing into their swim suit, she suddenly felt very self conscious being nude next to Sally. It wasn't that Sally did anything different. In fact, she barely glanced in the older woman's direction. Jennifer just couldn't get the thought out of her mind that exposing herself to Sally was just like letting any of the men outside see her naked.

It was a stupid idea of course, she thought. After all, she was over ten years older than Sally and while she looked good for her age, she definitely didn't have the same body she had back in high school.

That night, long after all the guests had gone home, Jennifer found herself standing nude in front of the bathroom mirror and taking stock of herself. Her hair was still the rich brown color it had been since she was a child, no sign of even a single gray strand. A few lines showed in her face, but there were a lot less than many of her contemporaries. She could chalk that one up to good genes, both her mother and grandmother had aged gracefully as they liked to say.

The large 36C bust that had been so popular back in high school had suffered some of the effects of age and gravity, but serious attention to her physical well-being over the years had helped reduce the negatives there as well. Her small pink nipples were still immediately noticeable, popping to attention as the cool evening air hit them. Absentmindedly, Jennifer ran her middle fingers over each of them.

From the brief glance she had taken before she felt a little foolish, Jennifer remembered that Sally had small very dark brown nipples. She idly wondered if the younger woman's nubs were as sensitive.

Jennifer's stomach showed she should get back to the gym, a long lazy summer had let a few pounds collect there. It wasn't obvious as the bulge that was wrapped around Jack's belly, but even a few too many pounds on a woman stood out.

Her hand slid down to the hairy bush between her legs and gently stroked the center of it. Once upon a time she used to trim her hair regularly, but it had been so long since Jack had noticed she no longer went to the trouble. Oh, they still had sex now and then, but it had been reduced to the occasional wham, bam and thank you ma'am. Long gone were the days when they went at it all night, and if they boys were away, into the next day as well.

The next week passed quickly for Jennifer and she only saw Sally for a few minutes on Friday. Even so, the young Asian woman was never far from her thoughts. She just couldn't get the idea that she was a lesbian out of her mind. What was it like she kept asking herself, making love to another woman? What would it be like to even just kiss one? Of course she'd kissed other women over the years, relatives, girlfriends and such, but they were always safe sexless kisses. How different would it be if backed by passion?

One quiet afternoon, she actually dug out one of those old porno tapes that Jack kept in the basement and watched it. It had been over ten years since she'd watched one of them with him and she tossed aside boxes until she found the one she remembered. She fast forwarded past all the male and female scenes until she got to images of girl on girl sex. She must've watched that five minute segment a half dozen times. By the last time she watched it the young Chinese woman in the film had metamorphosed into Sally's twin. It was quickly becoming an obsession.

Saturday was the busiest day of the week and Jennifer thought it would never end. About ten o'clock, she crawled into bed and fell asleep. About midnight, she woke out of a listless slumber. Something was nagging at the back of her mind. Then it hit her, she'd forgotten to set the washing machine after she'd put in that last load. Normally she would run it overnight to take advantage of the lower electrical rates. She knew that it would keep her awake the rest of the night if she didn't go down and run it now. It was a silly thing really, but that was the kind of person she was.

Slipping out of bed as quietly as she could, Jennifer was careful not to wake Jack. Listening to his heavy breathing for a moment, she doubted that he would've woke if she jumped up and down on the floor.

Down the back stairs she went, carefully opening the door to the laundry room. It took less than a minute to set the machine and she was about to start back up the stairs when she heard a soft bang from the front of the basement. The bang repeated itself a moment later, this time loud enough for Jennifer to identify it as coming from Sally's basement apartment.

Not sure what to make of the noise, Jennifer stepped back from the stairs and tip toed instead into the small storage room that was situated between the laundry room and the basement apartment. Once inside the tiny room, Jennifer could hear voices from Sally's apartment. Curiosity overwhelmed her and she pressed her ear against the wall to hear more.

It was hard to make out exactly what was being said through the sheetrock, but it was very obvious that Sally had company in her room. Based on her recent revelations, it didn't take a second for Jennifer to realize that it was another woman.

"They're making love." Jennifer said to herself as she pressed harder against the wall in order to hear more. "This is exciting." she added as she realized that her heart was beating at a much quicker pace.

Jennifer regretted Jack having done such a good job with the wall insulation as she could only hear parts of what was going on just a few feet away. One thing that she had been able to make out was that the other woman's name was Amber.

"God, I wish I could see what was going on." Jennifer thought as she squeezed her breasts through her nightgown. "I can't remember the last time I was this excited."

Then it came to her in a sudden memory. A few years back, her youngest had drilled a hole in the wall in order to spy on his older brother. She had found it by accident one day and really thought it was rather silly. That was until she had looked through it one afternoon when she had come home unexpectedly and saw Chris standing naked in the center of the room. It came as quite a shock to her. Her oldest son had grown into a handsome 6 footer with blue/green eyes and short blonde hair.

His nakedness wasn't as startling as the fact that his girlfriend, Joyce, was on her knees in front of him, equally naked - her mouth wrapped around his cock. Intellectually, Jennifer knew she should've immediately turned away from the image but the eroticism of it held her at the peephole.

Joyce was a pretty enough girl, but rather skinny Jennifer had always thought. She had small breasts, no more than a B-cup, which always made her wonder why Chris dated her. In the past all of his girlfriends had been rather well endowed. As she watched her son's hardness slide back and forth between her lips, she no longer had to wonder why.