The Seven Kisses Ch. 00

She ignored him. "Second, I did say I always sorted it out. Of the three travelers they took over the years, I'm pretty sure at least two made it back out just fine. My point is, they've never messed with the town before."

"... What, am I supposed to play the mediator?" Leon knew he could be persuasive, but so could buxom fey temptresses, he imagined. He tried to effect a confident smile anyways.

"Try 'investigator'. If you can fix this on your own, though, great." She sighed. "I'm not expecting you to save the few we lost, just... work out what's going on, see if you can convince the fauns to let the people go. If you can sort out what's got them so excited, so much the better. I'm just trying to get you up-to-speed."

"Of course, of course. And by the by, I hope my tone's not acerbic, you know." Leon gave a sigh and leaned against the table, finally beginning to pick at his meal with one lazy fork. "I... fear this was an offer I couldn't refuse, as it were. If I've a grievance, it's certainly not with you."

After a moment's apparent thought, she took another bite out of the danish. "I'm ig a bag moo ish ornig. Ot ur fall."

It took Leon a moment to decode this.I'm in a bad mood this morning. Not your fault. He gave an uncertain nod, picking up his steak knife and fork and beginning to saw off a piece. The meat was tender and cut easily. "Be that as it me. How're the danishes, by the by?" He popped the morsel into his mouth. Gods, it was delicious. Who knew vegetarians could sear flavor into a steak so flawlessly?

She shrugged. "They're alright. Only mildly poisoned—sort of 'rum' level. So do you have anything else you need to know?"

...

Leon pushed the meal away from him. "Oh, yes, I do have one question. Is it a bit of a foregone conclusion to make any inquiries with the... peasantry?"

"We don't have peasants 'round here. Just people. You can ask them, but I don't know what they'll know. Blacksmith might have seen something." Riley polished off her danish with an appreciative smacking of her lips.

"... Riley, that meal's poisoned, yes?"

She nodded slightly, licking her fingers clean. "The danish is a bit."

"Is it safe for... consumption? Or are you just that kind of person?"

"Yes and sometimes."

Leon blinked.

Well, I've hardly a position to judge from. I rise to my feet. "Iarile, it's been a pleasure."

"Take the low road to get to the Cotton Wood. Don't mess with the cotton webs." She slid his plate back over to his side. "Good luck."

"Yes, yes, same to you and all that. Jingka!" Leon glanced over his shoulder. "How much for the meal, dear?"

"Hm?" The barmaid poked her head out, blinking big eyes. "Oh, that's—" She paused. "We'll put it on your tab when you come back tonight. I-I mean, you can pay it. When you come back. Tonight."

"Suits me just fine. Riley." Leon took a step over and leaned in, catching Riley's attention. She smelled less of mint and more... herbal. He whispered into her ear, "One silver for the tip. Would that be gauche?"

Riley blinked rapidly. Up close, Leon realized she was blushing a slightly darker shade of green. She avoided his eye contact. "... ooh. Well, um..." She took a deep breath, leaning in slightly. "I... I suppose..."

"Are you... alright?" Leon stared at her, initial confusion giving way to a tiny feeling of delight. Was she... smelling him? He'd heard about goblin sensitivity to human pheromones, but the switch in her personality was tangible.

"I-I'm fine." Her eyes darted across to his waist, then down. "Tired, is all." She giggled, rubbing her eyes. "I-I mean, a silver is a bit... generous."

Leon affected indignation, taking a step back. "Riley!"

She flushed pine green and focused her gaze on the table. He heard her mutter something to herself—"Tired," it sounded like.

"Jingka!" he called, grinning as he straightened. He plunked the silver onto the table. And, what the hell, he grabbed a danish. He had little to fear from some mild poison, after all, especially if the goblin maids themselves were so easily rendered speechless from a caress and a whisper. "I've left the t—the gratuity on the table for you!"

He waved over his shoulder to the two goblins as he left. Jingka was beaming at Riley, who was intensely glaring at the table.

'Married to her work,' indeed.

Perlgrut was a very little town, befittitng its diminutive inhabitants, and he found his way fairly easily to the blacksmith's house—a squat, practical-looking brick dwelling.

He rapped at the door, speaking softly. "Beg your pardon?" he called. "I, ah. Understand that you've a cause for concern." After a long silence, he continued, "If it's quite alright with you, I'd like to ask a question or two. Won't take but a moment of your time, I promise."

There was another long silence.

He heard footsteps, and the door opened to reveal a rather brawny goblin maid wearing only a bra, an apron, and a short skirt. He noticed that her shoulder-length fiery red hair looked like it had been scorched in places—no doubt a danger for even the most competent blacksmith of her size. She was sweaty and flushed pink.

... Small wonder that her husband would be sturdy as a stallion, he couldn't help but think. According to Jingka, at least.

She blinked, looking him over. "I... yes, yes, certainly. You're here to help?"

"If ever there were a cause nobler than reuniting a beautiful woman with her beloved, I'd like to hear it, for I've not heard it yet."

She opened the door a little wider, hesitated, then made way for him to slip past her. Her cottage was quite cluttered—though her forging shed was next door, many old projects seemed to have been left around the house. She gestured limply toward a comfy chair. "You know what happened?"

As Leon sat down, he reminded himself that this woman was married. This was a temporary situation—one that he had been sent under some duress to investigate and implicitly solve. He should probably stop glancing at her prodigious cleavage, no matter how tightly the bra struggled to hold it in. "As far as I've heard, your husband is... temporarily missing. Do you know where he would've been last?"

"He was... out in the garden, behind the house. It was night. A week ago, I think?" She dabbed at her eyes with her apron. "I was in the shed, working. He likes to garden while I work, so I can... cook him something up when we're done."

"That close, hm?" Leon chewed the inside of his cheek.

She sat down on the armrest beside him, eyes downcast. "Yes. Very close. But... I didn't see who took him."

"Did you hear anything?" Leon tried to keep his voice gentle. "Even the smallest detail may be critical."

"I heard... it sounded like a woman. Women." Her eyes flashed. Her hand gripped Leon's shoulder tightly and started to massage it, as if working out her nerves on him. "I, um... I suppose I heard them speaking to him. They were telling him to... to look at the stars."

"The stars. Interesting." And a bit sinister for its apparent innocuousness. Leon couldn't help but wonder, though, why she hadn't gone out to see who it was.

Especially with how... forward she was being right now.

"Yes. I..." She took a deep breath, then, as if reading his mind, added, "I meant to go out, but I assumed it was some goblin maids playing with the new girl in town; that funny city girl. Then..." She bit her lip, appearing to barely hold in a sob, and leaned heavily on Leon for support. Her voice dropped to a tight whisper. "... then I heard them say, 'Good boy.'"

Leaning as he was, he could feel her labored breath—as well as hear it in his ear, see her ti—her bosom rising and falling heavily. Heavily. Leon swallowed.

"And I realized it was my Imka they were speaking to," she went on. "But it was... it was too late by then." She whimpered softly, continuing to knead his shoulder.

"Shh." Leon tried not to enjoy the massage, reaching up to stroke her hand. He met her sad cerulean gaze with a look of pure sympathy. "There was no way you could have known."

"No," she admitted. "But... oh, if only I'd gone out sooner. When I made it out, there was nothing." She bites her lip. "Nothing but his footprints leading toward the Cotton Wood. And... and hoofprints."

Just as Riley had said. Not the most reassuring information, the idea that these fauns were bold enough to walk into town, but... Leon felt a bit sorry that even for a moment he'd questioned the intentions of the wid—the married woman who was currently sitting next to him. A lady in such pain as she. Of course she'd meant to go out sooner.

"Dear," he began.

She swallowed. "Maybe? I don't know. It sounds so strange."

He stopped short and blinked.

She blinked down at him.

Leon closed his eyes, took a moment to collect himself, and continued. "I'm going to do everything I can to see him returned safely to your arms. But I need you to do something for me, alright?"

She blinked twice. Such big, pretty turquoise eyes... that belonged to a married woman who was grieving.

Leon was plagued by guilt as he firmly kept his eyes on hers. He was also absolutely helplessly afflicted by her charms. He wasn't sure which was responsible for the three silver pieces he was taking out and pressing into her hand. "I want you to go down to the diner and have a nice, hot meal. Invite a friend, go by yourself, whatever you like. But let's just get you out of the workshop so you don't work yourself to exhaustion, mm?"

She blinked three times.

She nodded slowly, giving a weak smile and taking the silvers. "Yes. But, um..." She hopped off of the armrest, at last breaking contact with him. "If you're looking into this... let me help you."

She vanished into another room.

A moment later, she returned, now with a little metal heart-shaped tin. She had a bashful smile on her lovely face. "I... made this for the Ranger, once. She didn't have any use for it, and then I married Imka, but..." She held it out for him. "The dark truffles should help clear the mind. And, um... the pale ones might do something else. It's been a while since I baked anything like this."

Leon blinked down at the tin before accepting it with a smile. "Imka's a lucky man to have such a talented wife."

She giggled and cooed slightly. "Just be careful out there! The Cotton Wood's easy to get lost in."

Do not say, 'Just like your eyes.' Do not say, 'Just like your eyes.'

"Noted." He rose to his feet, flinching slightly from pins and needles. "I suppose I'll be off, then. Please, take care of yourself."

He was quick to turn his back to her so she wouldn't see a very slight bulge in his trousers—a little loan from Jingka that she had been so kind to renew for him.

She just smiled at him as he took his leave.

~ ~ ~ ~

Leon was struck by the stark contrasts of the Cotton Wood the second he was inside it. In an instant, virtually all sunlight was gone, blocked by the canopy above. Thick cotton blossoms draped across pale white branches above. It was like being surrounded by ghosts.

The low road to the Cotton Wood had been long and winding, and he was already feeling a little sore from the walk. Bother, he thought, scowling around at the ominous setting. Of course they'd contract a job like this to some so-called "yokel." The nerve of those bloody elves.

After a moment's consideration, he decided it would be better to be seen than to be heard stubbing his toe on every arching root, and took out his lantern. He sat down on a conveniently-placed boulder and procured the matchbox, then paused, as he caught a glimpse of something in the dust at his feet.

He struck a match. He sucked in a deep breath.

It was a cloven hoofprint.

A pair of cloven hoofprints.

Looks like I came to the right place, he thought ruefully, and hurried to light the lantern.

He felt a little silly for the sense of urgency. After all, fauns were just fauns. He'd read enough to know their reputation. A bunch of submissive cock-dumb wantons with antlers. With his own special 'talents'—the ones the elves had selected him for to begin with—Leon almost couldn't wait to see the fauns try something on him.

But he couldn't shake the sense that there were more dangerous things in this forest than fauns.

Riley's words suddenly echoed in his mind. Don't mess with the cotton webs.

He frowned up at the canopy above.

What webs?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

TO BE CONTINUED...

Nicole's Note: Thanks for reading! This is adapted from a "Dungeons and Dazes" game (my own homebrew) I ran with the incredibly talented writer Carol_J. Carol is also on this site, and was actually the writer who inspired my goblin maids! Let me know if you like this story, and go check Carol's lovely work out!