The Spotter's Club Ch. 01-02

"I don't know." That was an honest answer. "I ... I never thought about it."

"Um ..." she paused, "I understand."

Next, I felt her fingers, gently running alongside my arm, from my shoulder to my elbow. Soft, but not intended to arouse ... just a sweet caress. I took a deep breath, and with an exhale, sank my body into the bed.

"Can we ..." I hesitated, "Can you stay with me for a while?"

"Oh, sure," she said, "As long as you'd like. We have this room for another 6 hours. We only have to leave before the day breaks."

"Right." I remembered that part of the instruction.

I felt her standing up. She walked away and I heard a gentle flick of the switch.

Then she climbed back onto the bed, and with her fingers, she lifted my blindfold off my head. I opened my eyes, and can see nothing. The room was pitch dark, she had turned off the light.

"Does that feel better?" She asked, in the dark.

"Yes. Yes, thank you. I didn't know I could do that."

She smiled (I was sure of it), "I don't think we are supposed to do that. But the rooms are in the basement, and they seal off any outside light. I think we are okay."

I tried to turn in her direction, but I cannot see anything, not even her outline.

I heard the sound of her taking off some clothes. She sat on the edge of the bed, and I heard her putting her shoes softly down. The next thing I know, she laid down on the bed, and rolled towards me. She turned towards me, I can feel my breath and whiffs of her hair against my arm. I could feel the fabric of her bra. Her naked arm now reached across my belly. She seemed a little unsure as to how to position the rest of her body.

"Is this okay?" She asked, tentatively.

"This is great. I ..." I couldn't think of another word to say.

She was comforted, and moved her body closer. I could feel her thighs against mine, she pulled herself closer, and snuggled up right next to me. She put her hand over my chest, and in the dark, I could feel my own heart beating ... not pounding ... just beating, against the gentle weight of her hand. I was sure she can feel it as well. She took a deep breath, and let her body sank into the bed and into the spaces between us. She seemed content.

--

I didn't know how long we laid there. Her breathing was even, and mine eventually evened out as well. The rhythm of our breathing from time to time overlapped and went in sync, and I could feel the rise and fall of my chest against her hand, and her chest against the side of my arm. It felt like the ocean waves lifting themselves against the shoreline, and retreating.

"I think you are beautiful." I said.

She lifted her head ever so slightly, then laid back down, and held me a little tighter, I could feel her nose and cheek against my arm.

"I mean ... I can feel that you are beautiful." I tried to say what I meant without being corny.

"Thank you." She replied, gently. Silence, the comfortable, accepting, almost sweet silence once again enveloped us in the darkness.

---

"Do you think ..." she tentatively broke the quiet, and seemed to be struggling for words, ".. do you ... do you think you would come back?" I didn't know how to answer that. That's another thing that I didn't think of. Was this going to be a way of my life, or was this one time my fulfillment of fantasy that allows me to move on and move back into my good and real life?

"I don't know ..." I mumbled. She was quiet.

I wanted to think of something to say. I felt a pensiveness seeping from her laying next to door.

I wanted to say something to lift it ... but I couldn't think of anything honest to say.

I could feel her mouth open ... but words would not come out ... she closed her mouth again. What did she want to say?

She tried again. Still, no words.

I turned towards her. I reached around, and held her shoulder. I felt her turning up her face to look at me, and I look at her. Of course, we see nothing but darkness ... but I could feel her eyes.

She found the courage to open her mouth again.

"I ... I was just thinking ... um ... I don't want you to think ... I don't know how to say it. I ... okay ..." There was a smile in her voice, a self-deprecating smile, "Okay ... let me try this again."

Then, almost mechanically, like a kindergartener following a teacher's instruction, she slowly annunciated each word.

"I ... would ... like ... you ... to ... come ... back ... for ... me."

She laughed at herself, "Okay, I said it ... I would like you to come back for me."

"Like ... a spotter?" I wasn't sure what she meant.

"Yes, like a spotter. My spotter." She says.

"But I'll be terrible at it ... I don't even know what I am doing." I stammered.

"You did fine today ... and it's your first time." She defended for my sake.

Now, I suddenly remembeed that she had watched the session, the whole session.

I felt blood rushing to my face ... embarrassment crept in.

She sensed it. She lifted herself off the bed, and reached for my face. Cradling my cheek in her palm, her fingers into my hair, I felt her eyes on me.

"I know how you are feeling," she says, "I still feel this way when everything is over. But I am here. Okay? You don't have to worry about me. I like being your spotter. I like to be there watching over you. I ... when you are in it ... I feel ... I can feel some of what you are feeling. I feel like I am in there with you. It's okay." She was very sincere. She was very re-assuring. I nodded. I didn't think of the darkness that is between us. She felt it. And she laid back down, next to me.

"You don't have to say yes," she whispered, "You have a lot to think about."

"Thank you." I said, "And ... thank you for asking me."

"Sure." She said.

She laid closer to me. Half of her body was almost laying on me ... her weight and warmth felt wonderful, and it almost seemed that the warmth could melt away the pain I was feeling. She moved her hand down to my belly, and gently, her fingers crossed my pubic hair, and covered my penis, now limp.

She did not fondle it or stroke it or do anything that was to provoke a reaction. She covered it, like a piece of cloth. I feel her face turning a little warm, as she nuzzled closer to my chest, her hair spread across my shoulder and arm. It was an incredibly intimate feeling, a feeling of being wanted and adored ... a feeling that may start with the sensual touch, but easily transcended it and left raw sexuality behind. I didn't think I have ever had the experience of having a woman's hand on my genital, and completely relax into a soft, aroused, but unexcited state.

My mind drifted ... my body sank deeper into the bed ... I was at the auction again ... the long hallway ... I was dressed ... I was naked ... the black curtain ... I see a slender figure standing up ... I see her dress ... I felt her lean over my bed ... I felt a kiss on my cheek ... I felt her leaving ... and then darkness.

---

When I woke, there was a soft dim light in the room. Katie was gone. I remembered the procedure. I got off the bed, and the first step I took reminded of instantly of the session I had. I walked, slowly, to the changing room. There, everything was when I left it. I got dressed, and opened the door. There was no one in the hallway. No noise of any kind.

I traced my way back. And found the heavy door. Taking a deep breath, I turned and walked out. It is still dark outside, but a hint of dawn is appearing through the buildings down the street. It was very cold. Barely windy, but air felt like razor. I looked behind me at the door. Then I turned up the street and started walking fast to keep warm.

I didn't look back. My mind was opaque, with dreams and half-dreams and unclear memories of words, sounds, and imagined imageries. Only the bond-chilling cold was the sure evidence that I have returned to my world.

(To be Continued. Chapter 4. I became her spotter.)