The Steamy Chase Ch. 09

***

"Say something, dude." Jean growled.

Why the fuck was his brother silent, Jean wondered. He'd waited till morning to tell Dean the news in his office since it had been too late by the time he'd left the club with his pals the night before. It was obvious Dean hadn't even known about the pregnancy. The news about the impending abortion had instantly caused all the blood to drain out of Dean's face. He looked as white as a sheet. But why was he so quiet. That was so not like Dean.

Dean shrugged. "What do you want me to say?" He finally asked quietly, looking up from where he sat, behind his desk, at his twin brother. "I can't even think." He added in a whisper.

Dean felt so much heaviness within his chest. His heart was pounding so hard his breath quickened. He felt like he was drowning. His mind was blank. The feeling in his stomach felt like when he was told that his grandmother was dead. Dean had been the favourite of their grandmother because he was the baby of the family. He'd been just a kid. But that feeling in his stomach had been so unpleasant and unsettling, he prayed he never got that feeling again. What he was feeling at that very moment in his office, was even worse than how he'd felt all those years ago.

"Call her, Dean. Stop her. You can't allow her to go through with it." Jean sounded desperate. "Dean..." He growled when his brother got a dazed look in eyes...as though he didn't even know where he was.

"Allow her to do whatever she wants." Dean said in a hoarse voice.

"What?" Jean bellowed.

But Dean only shook his head and cleared his throat. "Jean, I mean what I'm saying. If she actually does that, then I'll know that our relationship wasn't meant to be." He said quietly.

"Bullshit! Can you hear yourself right now?" Jean was furious.

"If she can actually snuff that life out, without telling me, giving me that say, that respect...then I don't think we belong together. It's my child but it's her body. We're not married, Jean. She can do whatever she wants if she's determined."

"So convince her that it's not right." Jean argued.

"You've not heard a word I've just said have you? Much as I love her, I don't think I can live the rest of my life with someone who is capable of doing what she's about to do. I'll be better off without her. So...allow her to do as she pleases."

"At least let's go to the hospital. Get to know first-hand immediately it's done. So she can't deny it. For...for all you know Cyril is wrong." Jean added in a whisper.

Dean gave a humourless chuckle. "You mean there's another Kayla who looks just like her out there huh? Don't bet on that."

Both men went quiet for a while till Dean's sudden explosion not only startled Jean, but broke the silence as well. "Fuck!"

"Dean..."

"All the signs were there." Dean muttered shaking his head. "The sensitive boobs, the increase in appetite and weight, the...worry..."

"She was worried?" Jean asked, sitting down heavily in the couch.

"There definitely was something on her mind. I've been asking her to tell me what's worrying her but she keeps saying, she's fine. Fuck, the burden she must be carrying around..."

"Don't you dare go feeling sorry for her, Dean." Jean growled.

"But..."

"There're no buts in this, dude. She made her own choice. She could have chosen another way. Don't make her out to be the victim here, 'cause she isn't."

Dean nodded. "I should have known she was pregnant? But I never saw her have morning sickness like expectant mothers are supposed to. She never got sick in the morn..."

"Not every pregnant woman gets morning sickness, dumbass. Whilst most don't have appetite for food in their first trimester, some would kill for food. Your Kayla is obviously not part of the 'loss of appetite' group." Jean said, making quotation marks with his fingers.

"How could she do this to me?" Dean groaned, burying his face in his palms.

"Is it..." Jean started but stopped. Then he took a deep breath and plunged ahead with his question. "Is it possible there's someone else? That the baby isn't yours?"

"If she's really pregnant, then it's mine, asshole." Dean glared at his brother. "I was her first. Besides, she's no slut." Dean growled.

"Just thought I'd ask. Sorry." Jean drawled. "Wait a minute...did you say..." Jean's eyes widened in surprise when Dean's words about being Kayla's first finally hit him.

"Yes Jean." Dean said with a sigh.

"Wow! We have to confront her, Dean. I understand that you want to allow her to do as she wants, see just how far she would go, but we have to be in that hospital. Maybe she will see us and change her mind..."

Dean shook his head vigorously. "I would only confront her after the time scheduled for the abortion. I don't want to stand in her way. Much as I want that kid, I want to see just how far she would go. I love her Jean. This is a woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Don't you think it's important I know what she's capable of?"

"At the expense of your child?"

"What can I do? Lock her up in a room? She has to want it. I don't want to force her to want her own child. Do you understand me?"

Jean gave a deep sigh. "Alright, how are we going to do this?"

"We'll do it your way. Confront her at the hospital. But only after she's done. You said Cyril said it was going to be this afternoon right?"

"Yep."

"So we'll be there. Hopefully, she won't go ahead with...fuck..." Dean muttered as his hand went to his chest.

"Hey..." Jean stood up.

"Please get me some aspirin from the bathroom, Jean." Dean muttered, putting his head on the desk. The pain inside his chest was robbing him of breath.

"Fuck!" Jean swore as he dashed into the en suite bathroom.

When Jean came back to the office, he grabbed a bottle of water and shoved it into Dean's hands. Then he stood back and watched as Dean swallowed the drug. Kayla had better not go through with her plan, Jean thought darkly. Because knowing his brother, he was never going to recover from such a blow.

"The bitch had better disappear from the face of this earth if she actually does it..." Jean muttered.

"What?" Dean asked, putting the half full bottle of water down.

"Nothing. Let's get going. We don't wanna miss the show." Jean sneered, turning towards the door. "I'll drive."

***

Kayla's eyes were red from crying. She felt so humiliated for losing it in front of Dr. Cyril Hawk. God only knew what the handsome doctor was going to think about her. She remembered all the subtle flirts between them before she'd started dating Dean. Cyril was a nice guy...too nice for her to lose her shit in front of. He probably thought she was some silly girl who had been stupid enough to get knocked up out of wedlock and too chicken to look after a kid.

"Are you sure you can go all by yourself?" Cyril asked. He felt sorry for the sexy girl, who he would have given his left ball to have as his...minus the baby of course. He wasn't ready for that kind of baggage.

"I'll be fine. Thank you very much." Kayla sniffled and stepped out of the room.

She just wanted to get home, get into bed and cry herself to sleep. She had taken some days off for her up-coming final exams so she could just take the drugs the doctor had given her and relax. By the time Dean got home, she would be calm and in a better shape. God, she was a mess. What she wouldn't give to be in Deans arms right that very minute. She just needed to be held...to feel like everything was going to be okay...to feel...

"Dean..." Kayla gasped and came to a halt.

Standing directly in her line of vision, on the corridors of the hospital, staring right at her, were Dean and Jean. And whilst the look on Jean's face was pure rage, Dean's was downright dejected. Both men were oblivious to the stares they were getting from people passing by them. They were handsome, had presence and looked exactly alike...why would people not stare? Kayla opened her mouth but nothing would come out. Then Jean looked her up and down with so much disgust in those dark blue eyes which were so much like his brother's, Kayla's breath hitched in her throat. They knew. How the hell had they found out, Kayla wondered silently. She couldn't have spoken a sentence to save her life.

"Where are your car keys?" Dean asked quietly, stretching out his arm with his palm up.

Kayla dipped her hand into her bag and brought out her keys and placed them into Dean's palm. Then her eyes lifted to Jean as he abruptly turned to go.

"Let's go." Dean said and also turned to go.

At the parking lot, Kayla noticed that Jean went straight to a navy-blue Cadillac parked beside her own sleek metallic silver Audi Q5, a gift from Dean on her twenty-fourth birthday three months earlier. She had protested when he'd purchased it for her, saying it was too extravagant a gift but Dean had insisted. She loved the car. But seeing Dean holding the door for her to climb in with that distant look on his face made Kayla wish she were very far away from the car that very moment. Just as Dean closed her door, Jean tore out of the lot with tires screeching. The guy was furious, Kayla thought with dread.

Dean got behind the wheel and drove them home without a word. The radio remained off. Kayla didn't know which was worse, the dead silence in the car or the look on Dean's face.

When they got home, Dean tossed the car keys to his chauffer and walked slowly into the house. The way he walked, like he'd been defeated in a fight, tore at Kayla's heart. She followed closely till they got to the huge elegantly decorated living room. Dean's house looked like a house out of a catalogue. The fact that he was a kick-ass architect couldn't be over-emphasized. The house was classically beautiful.

Dean went to the bar and poured himself a drink. He drained the glass and refilled it. Then he slowly turned around to face Kayla, who was just standing, staring at him.

"Did you do it?" Dean rasped.

Kayla remained quiet for a while. She didn't have to ask what Dean meant by that question. She slowly shook her head. "No." She replied quietly.

The relief that flooded through Dean was so palpable it almost left him breathless. That heavy pressure that had remained on his chest since Jean dropped the bombshell that morning, slowly loosened up. He felt such tenderness at the thought of his child, growing inside Kayla. Then pure anger reared its ugly head. Anger at Kayla for not only keeping it from him, but for also attempting to destroy it. Dean however managed to look so cool and controlled that Kayla couldn't guess the emotion running through him. From where she stood, Dean didn't show any emotion at all...his expression remained same.

"Why?" He asked tersely. His face, an expressionless mask as he waited for her answer.

Kayla shrugged. "I just couldn't do it." She said quietly.

"How is the baby?" Dean's voice softened.

"The baby's fine."

"How long have you known?" Dean's voice was barely above a whisper.

"Two weeks." Kayla responded softly.

Dean nodded. "Were you ever going to tell me? If you had gotten rid of it, would you have told me that there was even a baby?"

Kayla seemed to think about that question. She remained quiet for so long Dean thought she wasn't going to answer. Then she again slowly shook her head and whispered;

"No."

It was suddenly hard to breathe. Dean's knees went weak and he sat down heavily on the couch beside him. He had to take deep breaths to release the tightness within his chest. He'd never felt so betrayed in his life.

"I see." Dean said with a frown. "You didn't think I had a right to know?"

"Listen Dean, I didn't plan to have a baby at this..."

"Have I said you planned to have a baby?" Dean's voice raised, startling Kayla.

"I'm not proud of what I did, Dean." Kayla's started in a shaky voice. "I should have told you. And I'm sorry I didn't but you have to understand me."

"Really?" Dean gave a humourless laughter.

"Please hear me out." Kayla spoke firmly. "I just wasn't ready for this..."

"And you are now?"

"Dean, please." Kayla stared Dean down. "I can imagine what you're going through..."

"Sure about that?"

"...how angry you are...but put yourself in my shoes for a second. I thought I was on the pill so I was protected. Can you imagine my shock when it finally sunk in that I was carrying? I never suspected. I just felt...different. I thought whatever it was would pass so I didn't give it much thought. Then two weeks ago, I decided to go for my usual check-up. Only for my doctor to tell me I'm already two months gone. Do you have any idea how shocked and upset I was? There is school. I'm about to write my finals, Dean. Can I do it with this? With the way I'm feeling? The last thing on my mind is studying, Dean. I just want to sleep all the frigging time. How about you? Did you sign up for this?"

"You could have told me and listened to what I had to say." Dean growled. "It's my baby too."

"And what exactly would you have said, Dean? Two things. Both very insulting I assure you. You would either have offered to marry me...which I've sworn to myself never to allow in my life. I would never allow a man to tie himself to me just because I'm carrying his child. Such marriages never last. And the other; accusing me of trying to tie you down deliberately..."

"You know I would never do that." Dean said tightly.

"Do I?" Kayla looked incredulous. "Remember the Island? Remember how all that concerned you was whether I was protected..."

"That was different. I didn't love you then and you know..."

"But it doesn't change the fact that you might not be ready for a baby." Kayla retorted. "I'm not." Kayla added in a whisper.

"How about the third option?" Dean rasped. "Where I would be genuinely thrilled with the gift of life. Where I would be grateful to the powers that be, for giving me a child. A child by the woman I love more than life itself. Did that ever occur to you?"

"Dean..."

"I thought we were in this relationship together. I thought we loved each other. I kept asking you to tell me what was on your mind. But you didn't love or trust me enough to tell me about such an important thing. Just last night I pleaded with you, but you wouldn't say anything. You rather took matters into your own hands and attempted to take a life. My child's life. Put yourself in my shoes, Kayla. What would you have done if you were me?" Dean's voice was quiet. Too quiet. He was boiling up.

"The thought of a baby scared me. Too much was at stake."

"And now? What changed?"

"I...I just couldn't do it." Kayla said, her hand moving instinctively to cover her stomach. As if she was trying to shield the baby from harm.

"And your finals? How about the two insulting options which you so nicely outlined? How do you plan on proceeding, Kayla. 'Cause it looks like you have everything figured out."

Kayla recoiled as if he had struck her. "Damn you, Dean. I didn't ask for this. And I'm no monster." Kayla whispered.

"Seriously?" Dean sneered, standing up to pace. "Could have fooled me. You were able to keep this to yourself for two fucking weeks. You ate with me, bathed with me, laughed with me, fucked me, told me you loved me, slept in the same bed with me...and the whole time, you kept this from me. You rather planned on going through with taking a life. You probably only got cold feet when you saw the gadgets to be used, or whatever the doctor planned on doing to you. You definitely were not thinking about that baby when you were changing your decision. Afraid of a little pain, Kayla? Do you have any idea how painful it would be to lose one's life? Ever thought about that innocent life inside you for even a second?" Dean threw the glass filled with drink against the wall, shattering it and causing Kayla to jump. "I thought I knew you. You are not the woman I thought you were. You are cruel, Kayla. To even be able to think about this, consider it and actually go as far as you did, makes you a very wicked woman. I'm so disappointed in you. In fact I don't think I can be with you anymore." Dean said shaking his head slowly. "I don't even know who you are anymore."

Kayla took in the grimness of Dean's expression and knew that he meant every word that he said. She could feel herself trembling, her legs beginning to shake...so much so that she leaned against the pillar she was standing close to. After taking in a deep breath, Kayla nodded her head. She felt numb all over. It felt like she was standing outside herself watching the whole scene unfold.

"I understand. I'm very sorry it had to end this way." Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"That child in there is mine." Dean said in a deep voice. "I'll take care of it. You will never need for anything as long as it remains alive. I'll..."

That stung. Did he think she was going to kill her child or something, Kayla fumed silently. "We don't need anything from you, Dean." Kayla cut in firmly. "We'll be just fine. I'm not exactly a pauper. I'm twenty-four years old, and quite capable of bringing this child up on my own. I certainly don't need your money to do that. I'll get my things." With that, Kayla turned towards the stairs.

"Kayla..." Dean growled.

"Don't worry Dean. I understand. With the way you're feeling about me now, this relationship can never work. For what it's worth, I enjoyed every moment shared with you. Oh and just for the record, I changed my decision before I even went to that hospital today. So it's not some gadgets or some fear of pain that made me stop." Kayla turned and continued climbing the stairs.

She had only gone to see the doctor that afternoon, to cancel the abortion. She had meant to call and cancel that morning but had overslept. When she'd finally gotten through to the hospital at noon, she was told Dr. Hawk was busy so she had decided to go to the hospital personally and cancel.

She had thought long and hard about what she was about to do after that impassioned plea by Dean the night before. She hadn't been able to sleep. The idea of having a little boy or girl with its father's sweet looks and sense of humour was just too fantastic to destroy. She had pictured the three of them together having fun, her and Dean showering the little angel with so much love. Somehow, even before the night before, Kayla felt like that unborn baby, had in a way become part of her life. It had suddenly become clear to Kayla in the wee hours of the morning that she couldn't kill her baby even if it was just a clot of blood. She was ready to look after the baby herself if Dean wasn't ready to be part of the baby's life when she told him at dinner that evening as she'd planned to. Kayla planned on loving the child with all the loving that she hadn't had as a child. And she had a feeling Dean would love it too once he got used to the idea. Unfortunately, things hadn't gone as planned. If she hadn't panicked when she got the news, things would have gone differently, she was sure. But she had panicked and acted wrongly. Now she had to suffer the consequence.

Kayla knew Dean was hurt as he had every right to be but his words had cut her to the core. She just had to be strong, not just for herself but also for the baby. Her plan was to defer her finals till after the baby was born, because she really couldn't see herself passing her exams with the way she was feeling. Dr. Hawk had assured her that the way she was feeling was normal so she didn't have anything to worry about. She would rather use her remaining leave days to rest. She was going to sacrifice for her baby, have a good rest and just concentrate on bringing the little angel into the world, healthy. The two of them were defiantly going to survive. Touching her stomach, Kayla silently vowed to the growing baby inside her womb, to ensure it was safe and loved at all times.