The Therapist Ch. 08

Julia had just finished with her last patient of the day and while recording her notes she couldn't help but think about the similarities of the man who just left and her own, James. Not that she had any interest in the patient as it was her strict policy to never have a personal relationship with her patients, at least not while they were her patients. James was the lone exception and as a former patient he was the only one to know her on a personal level with a relationship outside of the office. She began to contemplate where she wanted this relationship to go and even whether it should continue. What began as an amusement of sorts had very slowly escalated into a very personal relationship between James and herself. In some ways this had surprised her. Always the one in control she had recently began to realize that her feelings for James went beyond him being just a toy to play with. She admitted, maybe for the first time, that her feelings for James ran deep and were complex.

But, what did it all mean to her? She knew he wasn't ever going to be her companion in any kind of equal relationship because the power pendulum was just too far swung in her direction. As she thought about it further Julia wondered for the very first time what it would be like to be married to James. At first she rejected any further thought on this wildly unexpected notion that seemed to just sprout in her brain without warning yet she also recognized that her attempt to push the thought away only gave credibility to the very idea. This intrigued Julia.

She let her imagination drift to the two of them living together and the conditions that would define such an arrangement. She knew that she might occasionally want another man and maybe even a woman as a sexual partner but for James it would be strictly a monogamous relationship. He would have no one other than her, not that she thought for a second he would want anyone else. Her acute sense of human understanding was certain that James wanted, actually needed, Julia to be the only woman in his life.

But, how would he react to her when she indulged in her own sexual relationships that did not include him. How jealous would he become? Would he be angry and resentful? If so, it would not allow the relationship to flourish and grow or even continue. However, if he were to feel the same way about the nature of the relationship as she did; yes, if he were to actually believe that such an arrangement was acceptable or even appropriate then, and only then, would a union of the two succeed. As a successful and independent woman Julia did not allow herself to fail at anything. At the same time she was not afraid of risk. Actually, she rather liked it.

She shutdown her notebook and moved her hand to her leg and lightly stroked it enjoying the feel of her soft white skin on her own hand. She slid her hand all the way up to her crotch and touched her panties. When she removed them and brought them out in the open to inspect it did not surprise her that they were damp and scented. This little mental exploration of the past 15 minutes or so had actually aroused her on a sexual level. Julia licked her dry lips and made the decision to carry forward additional thinking that would lead to a decision on the future of James in her life. She did this without fear or apprehension but with a sense of excitement as she realized that her future and happiness could rise to a level that she had never before considered. She could feel the seed of an idea beginning to sprout deep in her mind. As she let the thought linger it took on a form and Julia not only had the realization of an idea but an accompanying condition that would allow it to be used. She emailed James asking him to report to her home at 7:30 PM the next day.

The following day when James arrived Julia showed him into her private office and excused herself. James looked around the room for signs of change, any change, as his instincts were virtually accurate in an uncanny way when it came to Julia initiating something unusual and often very sexual. He sensed something was about to happen but like all the other situations that preceded this one he was clueless as to what his Goddess had in mind.

Julia reentered the room with two glasses of wine and handed one to James. "Thirsty?"

As James nodded, Julia handed one of the glasses to James and added this brief but succinct toast, "James, here is to our ever growing and dynamic relationship." She "kissed" her glass with his and took a generous amount of wine into her mouth and while savoring the full bodied flavor observed James for his reaction. He appeared more bewildered than anything else.

"James, I'll be leaving the house in a few minutes and will return late." Julia paused to gauge James response which registered as a slight dropping of his head which she knew to be disappointment, and acceptance. "I've leaving a book of photos that I want you to look at during my absence. Julia unlocked a drawer to her desk and removed a rather thick looking binder that had tattered edges and was without a label. I'd like you to look at these photos. No, I want you to study these photos tonight. If the very idea of it all leaves you cold or simply repels you in any way stop looking at them, leave the binder on my desk, and return to your apartment."

James appeared to have a lump in his throat but waited for Julia to continue. "Alternatively, if what you view appeals to you or even excites you then I want you to keep looking at them and determine the ones that excite and interest you the most. If that should happen then I know that I will find you here when I return. And, if you do stay I want to find you naked on your knees kneeling next to my bed with your forehead on the ground. I want the small lamp by my nightstand to be on. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Julia. Um, what kind of photos will I be looking at, may I ask?"

"What kind of photo's? Is that what you want to know, James? Hmmm, I believe they are photo's that will have the unusual effect of turning you off and on while they bring to the surface a variety of emotions. Again, some that will make you feel good, some may make you feel not so good, while others may confuse you and leave you to ponder feelings deep inside. They will help you determine who you really are.....and what you truly want." Pausing briefly, Julia added, "Did I answer your question, James?"

He nodded.

"James, can you tell how much I enjoy the suspense that it has so clearly been created in your mind. " Julia smirked a bit here and added, "Are you even a little excited? Does the thought of your goddess showing you something new, even more decadent, make your cock get all turned on?" Julia laughed a bit and continued on, Don't look so serious sweetie."

"Now, James, please get my black heels from the closet and place them on my feet. You know the ones; the ones with the tall spikes." James attended to the request and brought them to Julia who was now seated in the chair behind her desk. James looked at Julia's impassive face and knelt down and removed both of her sandals. Oh how he admired her feet. Without stockings he could see the bright white healthy skin that had a pinkish glow to it that was erotically framed with the five toes of each foot painted a deep, bright red. He took the liberty of kissing each one before placing the outrageously looking black heels on her feet.

"Well, don't you want to say hello to my shoes, James?"

Again, James took hold of Julia's foot and placed a kiss on the top of the shoe. He took a moment to breathe deeply so that he could savor the essence of his goddess. While doing so Julia angled her foot so that the stiletto spike was in line with his lips.

"My heels look a bit dusty, James."

Obediently, James took the heel into his mouth as deeply as he could and slowly sucked it moving from the top to the bottom. He repeated the ritual with the other shoe in the same manner.

"Well, it's getting late sweetie and I must be going. I'm going to miss you while I'm gone but you can absolutely believe me when I tell you that I will be thinking of you the entire time. Let's just say it's quite possible that we will both be thinking of each other at the same time. Doesn't that sound intimate, James?"

James didn't even have to time to answer before Julia bent down and placed her lips on his. To James they felt soft and warm and full of life. He didn't dare move until Julia administered the slightest amount of tension to his lips and then, and only then, did he return his part of the kiss to her. Collectively it was tender, soft, and highly charged. James had the thought that nothing, nothing could be any more erotic than this moment in time. Neither seemed to want to break it off; certainly not James, but finally Julia slowly drew her face back while emitting a sigh, "Oh, my James, I do hope you are here when I return."

During the kiss time seemed to stop for James but only seconds later he found himself alone in the quiet of Julia's office. He could here the ticking of the clock across the room. He licked his lips if only to savor the residue of his queen which aside from a faint aroma of her body wash was now gone. Clearly he was alone now with only his thoughts that were shrouded with apprehension about not only the next few minutes but on a larger scale he wondered if his life might be changing forever after this evening. Julia's dark reference to his staying or going made him want to not open the cover of the thick book. He wanted everything to stay the same; maybe not the same but he couldn't imagine life without her. He had sensed an intimacy that was new, yet undefined that had been developing over the past few weeks. It was an intimacy that transformed their relationship of James being the "plaything" to something more important and he felt certain that he was deeply connected to Julia's psyche in ways that he didn't fully understand. He knew that Julia probably didn't love him the way he loved her but he felt intuitively that he was an important part of her life and that she would really miss him if they were apart. Oh how he wished this were true.

James noted the time on the ticking clock being 8:15 then sighed heavily as his eyes lowered to the book on the desk. It was almost like someone else's hands picked it up and opened it to the first page but his fears were quickly assuaged as the only picture on the page was one of Julia in faded jeans and a green tank top smiling warmly at the camera. It was a much younger Julia that may have dated back to her college years. The fresh scrubbed face, bright eyes, and impeccable aura of confidence framed around an almost "girl next door" look practically melted James heart. He would have loved to have known her back then. He combed the entire picture taking in every detail and settled in with a single thought. She was as irresistible then as she is now.

James examined the thickness of the book and correctly deduced that all of the pictures were probably not going to be as innocent as this one. He flipped the next page. It was a photo of a shapely woman with long legs, black seamed stockings, and black pumps. Outrageously tall black pumps. The all white background further emphasized all the essentials of the photo; the seam, heel of the pump, the color black and, of course, the artful contour of the woman herself. Her face was shaded as an oversize black hat covered most of her face. James understood the photo was not about the upper part of her body. He felt himself stir a bit as he gazed upon it. He began to fantasize about her and how glorious it would be to worship the adoring shape. To kiss the toe of the shoe, suck the heel, and even to lick the bottom. He had no idea why this should be so exciting but he understood that it simply was. He glanced at the clock as sort of a reality check and was surprised to see it 8:30 PM. He had just spent 15 minutes looking at two photos.

James resolved himself to pick up the pace and he didn't exactly know what "late" meant yet realistically he did not expect Julia until at least after midnight. No, he would take his time for the most part looking at these photos.

Page three was a photo of Julia and his sister holding a tennis trophy. The ladies were dressed in white outfits and obviously very pleased with themselves. Again, James felt a bit disconcerted that his sister was posing with Julia. Was this a subtle reminder that Julia had the power to confide in Sara? Or, just an innocent photo? Oddly, James noticed that he stirred just a little bit more. This stirring prompted him to flip the page.

The fourth page was a close up of a man with a small penis encased in a chastity belt. He was not very well endowed and certainly not very in control of his sexual life. At the time he thought this an odd choice in the sequence of pictures.

The fifth page was the same man on his knees at the foot of the bed facing a woman who stared down at him while holding a key around a small key chain. She appeared to be dangling it in front of the man. He didn't look very happy but in contrast she was showcasing a superior smirk. The woman was fully dressed so it made for quite a contrast to the complete nudity of the man. Again, he felt himself stir a bit and had to adjust his penis for more comfort. He wondered what it would be like to hand over that kind of power to another person. Was Julia suggesting that she would like to have this type of power over him? He tried to not think too much about it.

Page six was Julia in her late teens blowing out the candles of a cake. She was surrounded by family and friends and everyone was laughing or clapping their hands. Julia's hair was almost boyishly short yet her unmistakable beauty was not hidden for a second. She was very cute and just on the cusp of blossoming into a more mature and confident woman. He smiled at this picture.

The next page brought James back to the reality at hand as two men were featured from the chest down. One man had a very small penis that barely stuck out while the other man had a huge tool that even soft completely overwhelmed the smaller one. The small one was white and larger one black. He found that he stared at this photo perhaps a bit longer than he intended to or wanted to but it was rather mesmerizing. He imagined how inadequate the one man would feel next to the larger one. He correctly calculated that was the point of the photo.

The next photo showed a man standing but bent at the waste leaning over a kitchen table. There was a woman behind him that sported a huge black dildo as if she were about to enter the man anally. The woman had a smile on her face but the mans could not be seen. In heels and boots she towered over the bending male figure displaying an absolute sense of power. James noted that he was about three quarters erect at this point. He wondered what other types of pictures would be included that would push him further. He knew he was about to be pushed further because wasn't that the point of this exercise? While on one hand he feared being taken along this path he knew there was another part of him that craved it. Whenever Julia was decadent or perverse it always seemed to heighten his excitement level.

At this point James sat back in the chair feeling the need for a break. He got up and went into the kitchen to make a cappuccino as he figured either way this was going to be a long night. He ground the fresh beans and poured milk into the metal picture. He filled the small metal cup with the fresh coffee and tamped it down hard to secure a good shot. When the machine was hot he loaded the cup in the handle and secured it to the machine. He frothed the milk to 158 F and then proceeded to pull the shot admiring the rich crema that poured forth. After settling the foam in the picture with two hard taps he poured a steady stream into the hot espresso shot and finished with a fancy heart design. Pretty impressive, he thought. He silently acknowledged to himself that he was stalling.

James brought the cup back to his seat and took his time savoring the drink. After he finished about half of it he picked the book up, again. He removed the marker that he had left in place as he wanted to view the pages exactly how Julia intended him to see them.

Flipping the next page was a beautiful woman shot from the waste up. She had medium sized breasts with small attached rings through the nipples, a thin feminine soft black collar, and her hair was pulled straight back lending a strong air of authority. James was, again, sexually moved at this photo. He thought she was absolutely stunning.

The next page was the same woman shot from a short distance but she was now sitting in a chair with her legs spread. She wore the same outfit with the principal difference being James could now see her spiky black heels, sheer black hose, garter, and huge erection. It was an enormous amount of information to absorb from one picture. James experienced a sense of feeling more than thought as he tried to process the dichotomy of the image. To his regret he felt himself stir a little more.

The visibly shaken James moved on to the next page that featured Julia in her office with her shoes off and her feet up on the desk. She was reading a folder and had a surprise look on her face. The photo effectively captured both her innocence and power at the same time. Her shoes were placed on top of the clean desk. James eyes traversed back and forth between the shoes and Julia's extended legs and feet. He was stirred, once again, to an even higher level of arousal.

The next photo was a close up of a woman's vagina that was for no better description covered with a mess of cum both on the outside and dripping from the inside. Whereas some of the previous photos were erotic enough in nature James had the thought that maybe this one carried a deeper message. But, what message and why? Being so turned on didn't exactly make it easy for him to process all that he was viewing.

Flipping the page simply confirmed his suspicions as the previous photo of the cum covered vagina now was being displayed with a man whose extended tongue made it clear that he was about to clean the woman. He was wearing a chastity device. The woman had a satisfied smile on her face but the man showed no emotion. The palm of her hand cradled his head not forcing it but gently prodding. This made James even harder much to his consternation. He realized that Julia could suggest almost anything and it would arouse him. He felt certain that looking at some of the photos would not have been so exciting if not framed in the context of Julia being the architect of the arrangements.

He turned the page and the next photo was the same photo that was on page one. Even though there was still room for more pages he instinctively knew that this was the last page. There would be no more photos to look at tonight. Glancing up at the clock he noted that it was now 9:30 PM.

He began reliving the final moments before Julia left and recalled her admonition for him to "study" the photos. While he felt quite certain that he had fully indulged each photo to the maximum he made the decision to look at the photos one more time. Perhaps more objectively this second time. This took him about half the time of the original viewing and when he closed the book he took an appropriate amount of time to reflect on his decision to leave Julia's home or wait for her in the bedroom per her explicit directions. The weight of the conflicting emotions was simply overwhelming.

It was 1:00 AM when Julia pulled into her parking spot and turned the ignition off. She sat behind the wheel feeling fully sated and sexually fulfilled beyond even her high expectations. At the same time she realized that it soon could become an empty feeling, one that would leave her joyless if she were to enter her home and not find James. As well as Julia knew James, and no one person knew the intricacies of his inner mind better, she realized that she could not know if he would be upstairs in her bedroom or gone; gone from her life, forever.