The Touch Ch. 21

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The lads had worked really hard and had the main patio area paved by the end of Thursday and so I released them back to doing deliveries on Friday and Maggie came out with Kitty and I to finish off setting the pond and preparing the rockery and low shrub features that would surround it. It was really great working with Maggie again on some real gardening; she was the design expert and the diploma horticulturalist. The fact that she was pleased with the work we had achieved so far which was a real boost to my ego. What was even better was that she spent time with Kitty and I working through design and structure issues and explaining how to get around some of the differences between the customers requirements and what would actually work in practice, and why. By the end of the day we laid out the rockery beds, barrowed in the top soil from the pond excavation and covered it with tarpaulin to stop it getting soaked if it did rain at the weekend.

We had also secured the pond liner and laid sand foundation for the edges. Steve had given me a lot of tips about basic brick laying but Maggie turned out to be a real dab hand at mixing cement and handling a trowel and the inner line of random slabs around the pond edges were concreted into place by the time that we were ready to leave. Landscape gardening isn't all about lawns, bushes and trees.

It poured with rain as predicted on Saturday but the garden centre was really busy, the new arboretum and covered walkways meant that customers could now roam most areas of the centre protected from the weather.

The Farm Produce shop had opened as planned on Wednesday and Josie was telephoning Mark each evening with her order for the next day which one of his labourers delivered early morning. Word had got around and the shop was doing good business from day one. Emma had had a real brainwave. When old Gracie Dwight had died last year the local paper had run a story and obituary with several old photographs from the 1950's and 1960's of Gracie's original farm produce stall. Emma had spoken to Mark for permission, and then rang the press office and ordered copies of the photographs which she had enlarged and mounted on 3' x 2' boards and were hung around the walls of the shop which, with the new colourful signage would make for a really upmarket boutique look.

Sunday was a bit overcast but dry and I had planned to spend some time doing jobs in the garden. That wasn't be as Emma had other plans and they were to be the catalyst for something that I needed to address with Mum but would have preferred to put off for a bit longer.

About ten-thirty I had just finished my first chore of the day, cleaning out the old summer house. I had piled all the garden furniture outside, swept out the building, cleaned the windows and oiled the door and had got out some sandpaper and started rubbing down the exterior to remove fungal marks before giving the whole thing a fresh coat of wood stain.

I had picked up the sound of a car stopping on the road outside the front of the house and a few minutes later heard Mum calling me from the back door and started up towards the house. I hadn't really connected the two as we do not normally get many visitors on a Sunday except Maggie and she would have pulled right into the drive.

"Jamie, we've got a visitor," Mum told me as I kicked off my boots and came into the kitchen. "I've just poured out coffees will you bring the tray into the sitting room for me, darling."

I picked up the tray and followed her through the hall. Emma was sitting on the couch chatting with Janice Copman; it must have been her car that I heard. She looked really nice, her blonde hair was pulled back into a pony tail and she was wearing her usual short sleeved rugby style shirt and a gilet over riding breeches, I guessed she had left her boots by the door.

"Hi Jamie," she smiled and stood up. Mum took the tray from me and put in on the coffee table and I noticed my sister give Janice a little push from behind. She stepped up to me.

"Hi Jan." As we gave each other a brief peck on the cheek I felt the tip of her tongue flick out and touch my cheek leaving a tiny hot moist spot. It was so quick that nobody else could have noticed, but it felt erotic and made me feel as guilty as hell with Mum in the same room. "It's great to see you ... but what brings you over here...?"

Mum had sat down on the other side of Emma and I felt a little bit uncomfortable standing in the middle of the room with Janice as if our conversation was about to play out before a critical audience.

Before Janice could answer me Emma chipped in. "I called her Friday to see if she wanted to do anything over the week-end. I need to cosy up to her so that she will invite ME over to ride with her sometime," she laughed. They had been really close friends at school and I would much rather see my sister hanging out with the likes of Janice than the crowd of no hopers she had picked up with at one time.

I hadn't made a big secret of going out riding and then on a date with Janice the previous month, Mum knew, she had been there when I got home, but I had learned the hard way not to tell my sister everything I did and who I did it with. I guessed, I hoped, that Janice had not told Emma how intimate that date had actually been.

Mum came to my rescue, "So what are you two planning to do today, then?" she asked Emma.

"I am actually working, Mrs. Riley," Janice put in, "I need to deliver a pony to his owners up near Cheltenham, it is a long drive pulling a trailer and I told Emma I could do with some company."

"That sounds great," I said, breathing a sigh of relief, "It will be a good chance for you two to catch up with gossip and old times."

"I'm not going, you idiot!" Emma giggled, "YOU ARE!" She obviously thought that this was a great joke, "You two are the one's who are dating so I volunteered you to go with Jan!" I glanced at Janice and she looked as embarrassed as I felt but I guessed for different reasons.

"Er, yes ... I mean no .... " I stuttered. A fortnight ago I would have jumped at the opportunity to spend the day with Janice, I genuinely really liked her and I knew that I was on an imminent shag warning with her. Having to decide whether or not to go out with her for the day, here and now, in front of Mum, this I did not want, it gave me a sinking cold feeling in my gut, if I got this wrong then somebody was going to get hurt, I didn't want it to be me or Jan, but I really desperately didn't want it to be Mum.

I made the decision. "Look Jan, it would be great but I am in the middle of re-staining the summer house.....perhaps another time?" Janice looked disappointed, Emma looked bloody furious, and I felt like a total arse-hole.

Mum was laughing, "Don't be such a killjoy, Darling," she chuckled, "Of course you must go, you can paint the stupid garden house some other time .... Or, better still Emma and I can make a start on it this afternoon, can't we Emms?" Emma looked a bit pissed at the idea of spending time with sandpaper and stain ...Serves you bloody right, I thought. Maybe Mum thought so too.

"But...."

"No buts, just go through and put your boots back on and I'll pour the rest of the coffee into a flask for you to take with you."

Mum went into the kitchen and filled one of the flasks that I took to work most days and then followed me into the back lobby and pulled the door to behind us.

"Mum, I didn't know.... I don't ...." She must have seen my anguish because she just smiled one of her radiant smiles and stepped up close and pressed her soft lips to mine.

"Go and have a fun day, Janice is a nice girl, I have always liked her," she told me, "We will talk later .... " I must have still looked like shit; I know I felt that way, "It's OK my darling, it really is .... I am secure with our relationship. Just promise me one thing .... Don't come home and tell me that you have spent the afternoon shagging her! If that is what happens... then so be it, but, I just don't want you to tell me about it, OK?"

"OK," I laughed. I wasn't really sure that I fully understood the deeper implications but at least she was smiling, and she genuinely seemed to not be hurt or upset and for me that was all that mattered right then.

She reached up and kissed me lightly one more time, handed me my waxed coat, pushed the flask and a packet of ginger nut biscuits into the pocket and then followed me round the side of the house and down the drive.

Janice had parked the riding stable's Land Rover, complete with a single stall Rice's horse trailer, in the road by our gate and Emma was standing at the tailgate petting a rather attractive little grey Welsh pony with one brown ear. Janice was already sitting in the driver seat and Mum leaned in as I pulled myself onto the bench seat beside her.

"If you can get back here before eight, come in and have supper with us," she told Janice, "I will make a casserole, there will be plenty for everybody and Emma and I can hold off eating until then."

"That's very kind, Mrs. Riley," Jan said. "But I shall need to get back to the stables after the trip, it's my turn to do final checks and lockdown tonight." She swung the Land Rover and horse box around in a very skilful U turn and I watched Mum and Emma waving us away in the extension wing mirrors.

"I am sorry, Jamie." Janice said as we pulled away, "I asked Emma if she would like to come with me and she suggested that you should come instead, I thought that she was going to tell you before I arrived."

"It's OK; it was just a bit of a surprise that's all." I had managed to get over my initial panic, the sun was starting to break through the clouds and Janice wasn't just attractive and sexy she was good company and fun to be with.

Cheltenham was technically only about a sixty mile drive from Salisbury and Jan had chosen to take the Marlborough Road north via Swindon and Cirencester, the most direct route, but the relatively short trip would probably take about three hours or so driving with the occupied horse trailer. We hit heavy traffic on the A419 bypassing Swindon, local signs said there was a caravanning event at Brunsden St. Andrew and the road was nose to tail with cars towing caravans in both directions with the traffic down to 15 mph. at best. By the time we were approaching Cricklade it was almost one-thirty and we pulled into a lay-by with a telephone box so that Janice could call ahead and say that we were on our way but would be later than planned. As we were stopped anyway, I gave the pony some water whilst she was in the 'phone box, and then got the flask and biscuits and we sat on a wall and took a break.

"I was beginning to think that you didn't want to see me again, because you hadn't called me," Janice said, she was leaning against me, her coffee in one hand a couple of biscuits in the other. "It's OK... Emma told me how busy you have been, so I forgive you."

"Yeah, I'm really sorry, I know it's not much of an excuse but I really have been very busy. Don't forget you still owe me dinner, I'm looking forward to that." I reminded her.

"Don't you forget you still owe me a fuck!" she retorted laughing, "I'm looking forward to THAT!"

I noticed that she still wasn't wearing the engagement ring she had had on the day we met at the stables and asked her about the guy she was engaged to.

"It's finally over," she informed me simply, then grinned, "if you had bothered to come round to screw me you would know that!" She paused and then added, "I drove up to Oxford and returned his ring, I think we were both relieved, there was no acrimony and we parted friends. So now I'm totally free again!"

We checked that the pony was OK then got back into the cab and pulled out into the traffic. The northbound road was less congested now and we started to make better time. Our ultimate destination was the small village of Southam just north of Cheltenham and we finally found the address about four o'clock. It was a cottage with a nice paddock to one side and after unloading the pony, I secured the trailer and then drove the combo up to the top of the lane to turn around whilst Janice led the pony into the field and chatted to the owners.

The drive home was a lot faster, we decided to take the A350 Warminster Road and bypass Swindon and were back at Salisbury just before six. Janice dropped me off at the end of our road so that she didn't need to turn the Land Rover and trailer again. We sat in the cab and she leaned over and kissed me, her tongue searching for mine and I felt my body starting to respond to her.

"On shit Jamie, I really have to go." She said glancing at the dashboard clock, "Try to remember to call me soon. You can't always rely on your sister to broker your dates for you, you know, and I can't wait for a shag forever. If you don't call me I shall come looking for you!"

"OK," I laughed, "I will call you soon, I promise. Just make sure that you and Philippa come to the Gala Day at the garden centre at Easter and you will be able to see why I have been so tied up this month."

I watched her drive off and then lit a cigarette and strolled slowly up towards our house. I had genuinely enjoyed our day together but I needed to sort out some issues with Mum before I could get my head around relationships with other people.

I let myself in the back door, kicked off my boots and took my empty flask through to the kitchen. Mum was sitting at the table with a mug of tea, she looked up as I came in, her smile was radiant and her eyes sparkled.

"Hello my darling, have you had a nice day?"

"Yes, yes I have actually," I said honestly, "Where is Emma?"

"Upstairs, taking a bath.... "

She anticipated my need, stood up and all but flung herself into my arms. I crushed her to me burying my face in her hair and planting little kisses on her neck and before I could speak she silenced me by pressing her lips to mine. They were soft and fluttery an aperitif to the deeper and totally sensual kiss that followed, a total mingling of lips, tongues and breath that left both of us panting and laughing with the sheer joy of our lust.

"Mum....?" I started, but she placed a finger against my lips to stop me.

"We will talk later, I promise," she said gently, "but right now you can check the casserole whilst I go and shower ... then you had better get in the bathroom when your sister is done ... you smell of horses!"

"And you smell of wood stain," I laughed, "You've got tiny little spots all over your face."

"That's nothing!" she chuckled. "You should see the mess I got your sister into ... that will teach her to try throwing her horny girl friends at MY guy!" We both laughed and hugged and she gave me another brief kiss as we heard the bath water gurgling down the outside pipe from the bathroom, then went upstairs to her room. I waited until I heard Emma leave the bathroom and go to her room and then went upstairs to shower and change.

Later, after Emma had turned in for the night, Mum and I put on our fleece jackets and sat outside on the patio two seater bench, with our coffees and I held her close to me, her head on my shoulder whilst we smoked. It was dark and we were out of sight and hearing of the house. We needed to talk and I don't believe that either of us knew how to start but in the end it was Mum who plunged in.

"Darling, we need to talk about your girl friends," she said, plainly but gently.

"I don't want...I mean, I don't have to .... " I stumbled. "I mean ... well I have you now and that's all I need." Even to my own ears that sounded a little desperate, selfish and childlike.

She tilted her head so that she could kiss me and then snuggled a bit closer. It wasn't cold we just needed to be close to each other. "Oh Jamie, my darling, what we have is wonderful, I am so happy and I would not change it for anything, but we must also face that what we are doing is unacceptable to most people and would be devastating to the people that we care for, if we were found out, or worse still, if we voluntarily made it known"

I started to speak and she silenced me with a finger pressed against my lips. "It isn't just that we are mother and son but I am also twenty-plus years older than you and that can make a lot more difference that you probably understand right now."

"Mum, I don't want to lose you .... I don't want us to be apart!"

"Oh no, my darling, I couldn't bear that either. But we can never live together as a couple, as man and wife, not if we wish to hold onto everything else that were care about. The only way that we could do that would be to go away somewhere we were not known, but leave everything and every one else behind, Emma, Maggie, your Aunt Susan, Lucinda and Lauren, our friends, everybody ... and forever!"

There was knot in my stomach, my throat felt constricted and there was the beginning of a small tear in the corner of her eye, I knew that she was feeling the same emotions that I was. I knew everything that she had said was true; I had already spent hours thinking about the same horrid problems.

Then she dropped the bombshell, the most devastating thing that she could possibly have said to me right then!

"Jamie, my darling," she said very calmly and softy, "If that is what you want, to go away, just the two of us, forever ..... Then I will do it!"

We sat silently for at least a full minute, I don't believe that I could honestly say that I was thinking about what she had just said, my mind was just numb, but I already knew the answer anyway.

"No, we can't do that; we could never be happy together knowing that we had destroyed everybody else that we love!" I could hear that my voice was hoarse but it seemed to belong to somebody else. The words seemed stilted like some second rate movie script. I turned her face so that we were looking directly into each others eyes, "Mum .... Are you happy now ... With me .... With what we already have?"

"Yes darling, I couldn't be happier."

"Then we can simply stay the way that we are, we just take one day at a time and we try not to hurt each other or anybody else. Can't we?" She was smiling and nodding, "So what was with the girlfriend thing? I really don't have any regular girl friends as such, you know."

"No, I know," she smiled. "But I want you to have girl friends, to go out with other women." I wasn't sure if she was teasing me or was serious. I certainly did not want to share her and I was not at all certain that I liked that idea that she was prepared to share me.

"But I don't want ....."

"Just listen to me," she said. She was smiling that wonderful smile that always melted me into total submission, "What we have had this week has been a bonus. My God, making love twice in one week that was fantastic, but it is not going to be the norm, most of the time we will just get by with a secret kiss or a few minutes cuddle, like tonight .... I have chosen to live with that, but that is not going to be enough for you, not for any young man!"

I tried to protest but she silenced me again and continued. "I want you to go out with girls of your own age, to enjoy their company, to be a normal young man. The bottom line is simple, I love you, my darling, and I want to keep you and I can only do that if you can lead a normal young man's life and come back to me because you want to."

I wasn't sure that I fully understood but I nodded anyway.

She leaned in and kissed me, her hot moist mouth was melting away my doubts and sadness, her body moulded against mine reassuring me that our mutual need was still as strong as ever.

She stood up, "Get a torch from the garage," she whispered, "I want to show you our day's handiwork .... We got nearly the entire summer house painted, you know."