tagIncest/TabooThe Truth About Jake

The Truth About Jake

byDoctorHook©

All characters are at least 18.

*

I don't make a habit of eavesdropping on my brother. For one thing, he's boring. But even if I did care about his pathetic life, listening to him talk on the phone with his girlfriend would be the last thing I would want to do. He can be such a sap. This was never more evident than the day I finally got fed up with overhearing him grovel to Trina.

"You know I love you right?" I heard him say from across the hall in his bedroom. I lay on my bed trying to read. "I would never think that about you." I rolled my eyes and dropped my book on my stomach, listening to him carry on. "I know, I know. But I still love you. You know that, right?"

I cringed. Jake was such a freaking hopeless romantic. I'd listened to him have this pathetic conversation so many times I'd lost count. And it was always the same. He constantly showered her with love and attention, telling her how beautiful she was, how sexy she was, hoping to get something in return, even the slightest bit of affection. But he always got nothing in response.

He'd been dating Trina for a few months, and he gladly spent his money on her whenever he could. It was a miracle he hadn't bought her a diamond yet. He would do anything to earn her love. But it always went the same.

I could just hear in my head the other side of the conversation: "That's sweet, Jake. You know I'm not that kind of girl, right? You're so nice, Jake. You say the sweetest things, Jake."

It turned my stomach. Trina was one of those girls who could lead a guy on all day if he would just keep liking her, even if she wasn't interested. She was too self-centered to tell Jake to go look for love elsewhere; she would rather just let him shower all his attention needlessly on her than to break his heart. But that's what would ultimately happen anyway. If she'd told him in the beginning that he didn't interest her, it would have been far less painful. But he was emotionally invested in a fantasy, and I could see that heartbreak was on the horizon. "Bitch," I said under my breath.

Jake never shut his bedroom door when he was on the phone with Trina. I never understood why. Didn't he know what a dweeb he sounded like? Was his hazy lovesick mind even capable of comprehending the pathetic tone of his relationship with her? Maybe it was an unconscious plea for help. Maybe he needed his wise older sister to show him the light.

I heard the conversation winding down and decided this was the day I was going to intervene. Somebody needed to save the dumb fuck's heart from his own stupidity.

"You love me too, right?" he asked into the phone.

"Maybe," I imagined her saying to him on the other end of the line. I walked across the hall and leaned against the doorframe of his bedroom and waited for him to end the call. He glanced up at me with his green eyes. He was so good-looking. It was as if he didn't even know it. I made a conscious effort to prevent my head from shaking as I watched him listen to the final disappointing response from Trina.

"I'll call you later," he said, already pathetically setting up his next round of self-defeat. I stood there with my arms crossed as he watched me. I forced a supportive smile to my lips.

"Okay, LeAnn. What is it?" he asked me, tossing his phone on the bed.

I decided to just let him have it right out of the gate. "Do you think you're her only boyfriend?" I asked.

Jake shrugged. "I'm the one she cares about."

I casually strolled over to his bed and firmly slapped his forehead with my palm, causing him to playfully fall backward in feigned unconsciousness. Jake sighed, looking at the ceiling. "Okay, tell me," he said. I think he sensed a dose of reality headed his way.

"You're an idiot," I stated matter-of-factly.

"Why? Because I'm in love?"

Ugh! It made my blood boil to hear him say that! "You're not in love! You can't be in love with her!" I had to take a deep breath and check my angry tone.

"God, she's so hot, Lee!"

"Oh my god, Jake. Do you listen to yourself talk to her? I wish I had recorded it so I could play it back to you. You told her you love her ten times just now."

"So?"

"So, how many times did she say it back to you?"

Jake sat up and looked at me pathetically. "She has trouble expressing herself."

God it made me cringe to hear him defending her. "Oh, Jakey. When will you see the light? You know she's not the only girl out there, right?"

"But I'm in lo—"

"No!" I exploded. "You're not!" Jake looked down and didn't respond. I softened my tone a bit. "Have you two been, you know...intimate?" I don't know why, but I really needed to know. I suspected not.

Jake half shrugged his shoulders. "We've kissed."

"Nothing else?"

His shoulders sagged a little. "Just some touching. We move kind of slowly."

Jake was a near-virgin. I knew the story well. Kim, the girl that got his V-card, was trying to win a bet with her friend. The wager was which one could bag the cute nerdy virgin first at my friend's house party. The two girls worked him all evening, and just when it looked like the other girl would win, Kim pulled him into the bathroom while the other was getting a drink. She fucked him on the counter without even taking her skirt off. It was over in three minutes. Clearly, Jake was the winner of that bet.

But instead of using the experience to bolster his own sexual confidence (like a normal male would do) and move on to the next piece of ass, he fell instantly in love with Kim and called her every night. I was sure he'd not been with another girl since. Hopeless.

I gathered up the fortitude to break the next bit of enlightenment to my little brother. I spoke with compassion because I knew this would hurt. "She doesn't move that slowly with other guys, Jake."

With regret, I watched the color drain from his face. "I know," he said softly.

I sat down on the bed with him and touched his shoulder. "Look," I said haltingly. "I'm not going to sugar coat it. I'm telling you this because I love you. You have no future with her."

"But I know if I can just make her understand—"

"Jake," I interrupted. "She already understands. It doesn't matter. She doesn't deserve a guy as sweet as you. Do you see?" I think I actually felt him melt a little under my touch. God, I felt awful! He suddenly jerked his shoulder away from my hand. He was hurt; I knew it.

I stood up. This exchange had reached its conclusion, and obviously without the resolution I'd hoped for. "All I know is you're a great guy who deserves better." I left it at that and walked out.

I lay on my bed and simmered as the dimming orange sky through my window became red and eventually purple. I had always felt contempt for the way my brother acted with his girlfriends. He always threw himself at girls headlong without any regard for the impact it would have on his heart. And it typically ended up broken.

I found myself almost envying the girls he fawned over. A guy had never done that to me. Just once I'd like a guy to fall inexplicably in love with me so I could know what those girls felt from Jake, to know what it was like to have a hot guy just throw himself at your feet. But I didn't attract guys like Jake. I was a bit too rough around the edges to melt the heart of a nice guy. I attracted jocks and dudes with shoulder tattoos—guys that didn't mind fighting once in a while, even if it was with me. I didn't take crap from anybody. More than one boyfriend was fooled by my large, pretty blue eyes and slender body and thought he could push me around. They always got a surprise when they got to know the real me.

So, sweet guys didn't seem to be in the cards for me. Girls like Trina got those kinds of guys—and used and abused them. And Jake was the most mistreated of them all. A seething cauldron of contempt for Trina was gradually bubbling up inside me.

"Jake!" I heard Mom yell from downstairs. He could be heard trudging down the hall toward the steps but hadn't responded to her. I got up and followed him down.

"You got a letter from Walsh!" she said excitedly.

Jake opened the thick envelope and pulled out the top piece of paper. He read it silently. "I got accepted," he said unemotionally.

"That's great, honey!" Mom bellowed.

Jake smiled and stuffed the letter back into the envelope but said nothing else.

"You don't appear to be adequately enthused," I remarked with a smirk. I knew what his deal was. And Mom was about to find out.

"Jake?" she asked. "Aren't you excited?"

He shrugged. "We'll see what else comes along."

"But, this was the big one, honey," she said, confused. "What else are you waiting for?"

"Ask him where Trina's going to college," I suggested, trying to keep my voice unemotional.

Mom's shoulders slumped and she looked back at Jake. "No," she said in her motherly disappointed tone.

"Wittenberg is a good school too," he defended.

"Not for a pre-med student," she remarked earnestly.

Mom looked at me expecting a little assistance. "He won't listen to me," I defended.

She shook her head and walked out of the room. Awkward silence filled the kitchen for a moment. Maybe it was time I tried a different angle.

"You know," I began with a teasing little voice. "95 percent of all high school relationships die in the first college semester."

He gave me a smirk. "You think I'm typical?"

Well, he had me there. He wasn't a typical male. But I figured this would be a good opportunity to tell him what I really thought of him. "I think you're unaware of your potential," I said cryptically.

"Potential for what?" he asked.

"Hotness."

"You think I'm hot?"

"I didn't say that. I said you had potential for hotness."

"So, you think I'm hot," he grinned.

"Moron. Nobody thinks a groveling, near-virgin weenie-boy is hot."

"What do you mean, 'near-virgin?'" He sounded almost hurt.

"Thirty seconds inside a vagina only barely qualifies."

"You were timing me? And anyway, it was more than thirty seconds," he defended.

"Oh, I'm sure she was ravaged," I said in a sarcastic tone. "Look, all I'm trying to say is you would be a lot more respectable if you didn't kiss Trina's ass all the time. What do you think would happen if you just stopped showering her with all the affection?"

Jake scratched his head. "Isn't that what girls want?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but I shrugged instead. "Well...sort of," I stammered. "I mean, it's nice to be treated sweetly."

"So what's the problem with that?" he asked.

"I dunno, Jake, think of it as 'too much of a good thing.' Women want a man who respects himself—someone who treats them right without smothering them. Kissing her ass like that just pushes her away."

"If I don't treat her like that I'm afraid she'll not want me."

I leaned onto the counter and looked into his green eyes. "Doesn't that tell you something?" It was like he couldn't see the flaw in his logic because he constantly had googly eyes. Maybe I could try to put it another way.

"You know," I began. "Girls are turned on by things other than being 'treated nice.'"

"Like?"

I probably looked a little embarrassed. I never let guys get rough with me, but the thought of it kind of turned me on—like getting manhandled a little. But I could never submit to any of my boyfriends. Something inside me would always prevent me from enjoying something like that. I would deflect any kind of aggressive behavior in a knee-jerk reaction—get tough with them before they got rough with me. But looking into Jake's sweet eyes suddenly lit the desire in me. I almost thought he could read my mind. But of course, he had no clue.

"Like, take charge a little, Jake," I said. "Don't be such a weenie all the time. Command some respect."

"Oh, so I should just grab a tit if I feel like it?" he joked.

"It wouldn't be any worse than what you're doing now."

"Like this?" he asked, grabbing my breast. Holy shit, my jaw nearly hit the counter. He just grabbed my tit!

"Uh..." I stammered. I smiled, embarrassed. "I meant do that to Trina!"

"I'm sorry," he said.

"See? This is what I'm talking about! You went right back to being a weenie."

"Oh!" he exclaimed, a light bulb suddenly coming on in his head. "I meant to say, call me a weenie again and I'll smack your ass!"

"Yeah, okay, chief. Don't press your luck." I walked away coolly, half expecting his hand on my ass, but it didn't happen.

I went back to my room and got undressed for bed. Grabbing the book I had been reading, I stretched out under the covers. As my eyes thoughtlessly scanned the words on the page, my mind kept wandering back to Jake's hand on my breast. It was completely unexpected. What was more unexpected was my physical reaction to him touching me. My nipples grew hard in my nightshirt at the thought of his uninvited hand—my brother's hand! "Little shit," I muttered under my breath. I shoved the odd feeling of arousal to a deep corner of my mind and turned off the lamp.

* * *

I spent the following day at work waiting tables, cleaning up spills, dealing with unhappy customers and generally reminding myself why I was getting a college education. I arrived home to find Jake had beaten me home from school and was crashed on the sofa. I opened the fridge to get some orange juice and took a sip, watching him sleep.

He looked cute lying there—mostly because nothing was coming out of his mouth. If he would just keep quiet he would live up to his hotness potential, his good looks being the only factor to consider. But of course, Jake was Jake, and his weeniness cut his cuteness by at least a factor of three. So I stood there for a while in the open kitchen, watching him sleep and pretending he was hot.

As I stood there with my orange juice, formulating a very guilty image in my head of my ideal brother, his phone vibrated on the counter. It was Trina sending a text.

I glanced at Jake. He hadn't stirred. Looking back down at the phone, I saw the message before the screen went dark. "Can't tonight. Anissa is coming over."

An irresistible urge to invade my brother's privacy overtook me and I suddenly found myself thumbing through his phone. There were lots of texts between him and Trina, but all I really wanted to know was the context of the last one she sent—just a little insight into my brother's relationship—what would be the harm? I decided to only look back on today's conversation. I rationalized that looking no further than today would minimize the creepiness of me lurking on his phone. The conversation was short, but telling.

After the usual small chit chat Jake asked her if she had an answer yet about going to the senior prom with him. I almost dropped the phone right there and went over to stomp his guts out, but I refrained and read on.

"I'll tell you next week," her reply read. Yeah, sure you will. Bitch.

"I know we'd make the perfect couple," he said. There was no reply.

Later, after school had dismissed, he sent her this: "Call me tonight?"

Then came the reply he'd just received telling him that Anissa was coming over. Horseshit, I thought to myself. I knew what Anissa was doing. Her boyfriend had come in for lunch that day and said they were all going to a frat party in Wilmington. If she was coming over, it was only to pick Trina up on the way.

My pseudo-innocent eavesdropping suddenly went full-on clandestine as I considered what to do with that message from Trina. I had a choice—set the phone down and ignore it, which is what I probably should have done, or say something to Trina that I thought Jake should have said a long time ago. I grappled with my conscience for five whole minutes as my eyes shifted from the screen to my brother and back again, trying to decide whether or not to do it.

Screw it, I finally rationalized; I'm doing the poor guy a favor. "I thought Anissa was going to a party," I wrote, and hit 'Send.'

"Why do you say that?" she replied. Ha! What a guilty response!

"It's just that my sister mentioned it." I felt delightfully evil as I typed the words.

"What does your sister know?" she asked. I grinned from ear to ear.

"She knows a lot." I glanced over to Jake and made sure he was still sleeping. I was being very bad. He was definitely going to be upset with me. But I felt justified—anything to force some respect out of that little tease. I continued on. "But I don't care what you do. I don't own you, whatevs."

There was a long pause before she finally replied. "Well, I'm going with her."

Here is where Jake would normally kick in to weenie overdrive and say something like, "Can I come along?" But, no. Jake was going to play it cool tonight. "Have fun," his new and cooler self said to her.

I knew it would get her. It took her about 5 minutes to finally reply. "You're not mad?"

"Why would I be?"

Then the question I was waiting for. "What are you doing tonight?" Yes! She no doubt wanted to know he was going to sit at home and think about her all night while she was out.

I delighted in typing the words. "Probably going out."

"With who?" came the immediate response.

I grinned as I plugged the charge cord back into the phone and tossed it on the counter.

"Not with you," I whispered to myself.

The deed was done. I went upstairs to my room to read some and await my fate. I knew it wouldn't be long. The first thing Jake would do when he woke up would be to check his phone for her reply; I knew him too well.

Twenty minutes later my heart skipped a beat at my brother's booming voice from downstairs. "LeAnn!" I wasn't expecting such ferocity. After waiting for an answer that didn't come, he bounded up the stairs and barged into my room.

"What the fuck?!" he bellowed, holding his phone six inches from my face.

I froze, unable to speak. I knew he would be angry, but this was more than I even thought he was capable of. "I just—"

"You've got boundary issues!" he spat. "How am I going to fix this?"

"Don't!" I pleaded. "Don't tell her it was me! Just go with it."

He flashed an infuriated look at me before dropping the phone and pouncing on me, completely taking me by surprise. "Who the hell do you think you are?" he asked contemptuously, knocking me flat on my back and straddling my body on the bed.

"I just wanted to—"

"You just wanted to fuck up my love life!"

I tried to sit up but he quickly pinned my arms down with his knees. I felt panic flash through my veins as his angry weight settled onto me. I couldn't move. I was at his mercy. If he'd wanted me to feel remorse for meddling in his affairs he had succeeded with flying colors. I pleaded with my eyes because he wasn't listening to my voice.

"What gives you the right to just pick up my phone and start texting people? It's fucking deviant, Lee!"

I simply nodded my head. I was afraid to speak. His knees were bearing down on my upper arms, cutting off my circulation, and I started to struggle. It only incensed him further and he brought his face down to mine, further increasing the weight on my arms.

"Answer me," he whispered angrily.

"I'm sorry," I whispered back. "I don't know what got into me. I hate her, Jake." There. It was out.

"Why?" he asked incredulously, his face mere inches from mine.

He was sitting on my stomach, putting all his weight on his knees. His closeness to me was beginning to make me feel strangely comforted in my vulnerability. Jake would never hurt me. But he was sure acting like he would.

Overcome by an unexpected need to protect my younger brother's heart, I kissed him gently on the cheek, despite the violent nature of our encounter. I spoke as gently as I could. "Because she doesn't love you," I said.

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