The Voice Within

"Do I have a choice?"

"Not really."

"Maybe I'll just get Joe Quack doctor to give me a dose of radiation therapy and short out your brain mass, or whatever you might be."

"You'll never walk again much less carry on a normal conversation."

I turned and started back up the stairs. "Maybe your creator has some answers."

"The way I cranked up your pheromones, you won't be able to get near her before she ravishes that little package you're packing into oblivion. Did you ever pack socks into your shorts to increase the proportions of your little Willie?"

"Hey that's a hit below the belt, Sister."

"Sorry, so what do you want to do?"

"Well you seem to have all the answers, you tell me!"

"Let's talk about it while you're getting some new rags."

"Right!"

Several weeks have passed since I first heard the voice of the parasite the dwells within and I'm delighted it harbors no jealousy even after sharing my most intimate thoughts and moments. It thrives on my fulfillment and chocolate while unselfishly renewing my confidence. As I lay in the arms of Miss K., a universally celebrated vocalist, I reflect back on those I have come to know intimately; all fulfilled beyond my (and their) wildest dreams. I've been with spinsters so frigid they could evoke a new ice age, and virgins so naïve that a mere touch could bring them to ecstasy. Disguised in all sizes and shapes, I entertained the essence of human existence up to several times a day. My resurrected equipment survived the test never wavering once in its pleasure packing destiny. Hoping we could patent the secrets of my allure, I was quickly stymied by my co-inhabitant for fear of "flooding" the market.

Turning to me with eyes filled with fathomless passion, Miss K. asked me to stay for awhile, and with her millions, I reckon a few moments of passion will reap the dividends I require to enhance my financial security. Further, living in a beautiful condo on the beach with unlimited access to the club house offered endless possibilities at procreation. I held her tightly, marveling in the smooth alabaster skin and wondered briefly how I had ever lived before. For an instant, I even thought of Dawn until my alter ego, the voice within, chided me gently and goaded me on to the task at hand. It was to be an experience I'd never forget!