The Washing Machine

They were in the baking aisle, and there were other people around.

"Meet me outside," she said. "I fucking mean it."

She sat on a bench and waited, her trolley beside her. Luke came out with a couple of bags. He seemed like someone who walked to the shops for something to do.

"What did Danny say?" she said.

"Nothing."

"Don't like," Anna said. "He told me he did."

Luke looked at her.

"So what did he say? Tell me."

"It's not just that. There's a bit more."

"So explain it to me."

Luke talked for a while about Danny, how he was busy at work, and distracted, and worried he wasn't giving Anna enough attention and also worried he couldn't, because he was too worn out. He talked about how Danny thought Anna wanking was almost like cheating, and Danny never had, and it didn't seem fair that Anna was.

Luke seemed to be being careful not to be specific. He never said sex, or wank, or that Anna had been humping a washing machine. He talked around the words they both might find embarrassing.

Anna listened, and wasn't sure this was what she'd actually meant him tell her. She wasn't sure if she wanted to know this, to fix things with Danny, or if she wanted to know that Luke was jerking off twice a day thinking about her.

She might have been looking bored. She might have been seeming distracted.

Luke suddenly said, "Can I watch?"

Anna looked at him and wondered what to say. "Not a chance," she said.

"Just once," he said. "Please."

She looked at him, and realized he was serious, and was a bit surprised by that.

"I've been thinking about you since he told me," Luke said. "Doing that."

Anna didn't know what to think. Knowing that was alarming, and a little creepy. And sexy too.

"Every day," Luke said.

"Why?"

"Because it's you."

"So?"

"I know you."

She thought about that and almost understood. "I'm not going to fuck you," she said, quietly. "I love Danny."

Luke nodded.

"I'm not going to do a thing with you," Anna said. "Nothing like that. You just watch."

"Okay."

"So why do you want to?"

"I like to watch."

Anna nodded, and didn't really understand, but didn't care that much either.

"Just once," Luke said. "Please?"

"Once," she said. "Except it's not really, is it? Once until we both want to again, and then again. I know how that goes."

"Once," he said. "I swear."

"Once," she said. "Just once, and we never talk about it again."

"Thank you," he said. Not yes, or great, or anything else. Just thank you, torn out of him like some need was being met.

"Follow me home," she said.

"Right now?"

She thought about that, then nodded. "Yeah," she said. "Why not?"

She went and loaded her shopping into the car and wondered what she was doing.

*

Luke knocked. Anna went and let him in.

"Don't talk," Anna said, and walked off towards the laundry.

Luke didn't. He closed the door.

"Lock it," Anna called. "Deadlock it."

She heard a click. She went and found a towel and put it in the washing machine. Then sat on it, and waited.

Luke came and stood in the doorway.

Anna reached back, and pushed the power switch on. Pushed the button that skipped straight to the spin cycle. She closed her eyes, and breathed in, and felt the washing machine start up.

This was strange. It was cheating, but it wasn't, and that idea turned her on.

Luke was going to watch. He wasn't going to touch her, and wasn't even seeing anything of her he shouldn't. She was fully dressed, in jeans and a top. She even had shoes on. He could see far less than he had before, since he'd seen her in a pool several times.

All the same it was different.

She felt the machine start to spin, felt it's rumbling move up through her body.

She opened her eyes. Luke had moved closer, was watching carefully.

"Come over here," she said. "Come closer."

He did, until he was right in front of her, almost touching her knees. After a minute he took her hands, carefully, held them gently, and that was nice. It was intimate, almost beautiful, given what they were doing.

It was strange being watched. Sexy, but strange. She was very aware of him, and couldn't relax.

"Don't touch me," she said. "Don't touch me any more than this. Don't do anything stupid."

"I promise."

Anna closed her eyes again and made herself relax. She felt the washing machine's vibrations, felt her insides squirm and shake and shiver.

She opened her eyes. Luke was staring like this was something wonderful she was doing for him.

She wanted to do something wonderful for someone. She wanted a connection, contact with another person. This was good. This was sharing sex with someone, no matter how odd the sex was, and that sharing meant something.

She closed her eyes again and started to breathe fast. The washing machine's vibrations were turning her on. Luke was turning her on. She held Luke's hand, and felt the deep rumbles of the washing machine inside her, and got closer and closer.

"I'm almost there," she whispered.

Luke didn't answer. She might not have spoken loudly enough for him to hear.

"I'm about to," she said, louder, and Luke said, "Yes."

She came. She came, and gasped in air, and felt her insides shake in time to the washing machine. She opened her eyes at the end, and looked at Luke as the last little ripple went through her. He was staring at her like she was some miraculous and wondrous thing.

Her breathing slowed. She reached back and turned the washing machine off and wondered what she'd just done.

"Shit," she said.

"That was wonderful," Luke said.

"That was wrong," she said, suddenly worried.

"It wasn't."

"I shouldn't have done that."

"It's fine," Luke said. "I won't say a thing."

She thought. Looked at Luke, and thought. She was still breathing hard. She could still feeling herself wet and tingly inside.

"Never again," she said. "Just once, remember?"

Luke nodded.

"Promise you won't tell," she said.

"I won't." he said, "I promise." Then "Thank you."

"Yeah," she said, unsure if she should be feeling this guilty. She'd just done something terrible to Danny, had betrayed him, and she wasn't even sure why.

She sat, and thought, and realized that suddenly she didn't feel so empty and lonely after all. It wasn't the sex, she thought. This wasn't sex at all, since Luke had barely touched her. It wasn't the sex, it was having an orgasm with a human connection, that was what she'd needed.

She might actually be happy with this, she thought. Happy with once ever, just to have tried it. Tried being watched, and cheating, both.

"You should go," she said.

Luke nodded, and squeezed her hands, and said, "Thank you," again, very intensely. Then he let go and went out the door.

Anna sat there and looked out the window and wondered what she'd just done, and how something terrible could feel so perfect.