The Way Back Ch. 04

FOURTEEN

"It's not that she didn't find me, it's the fact that she didn't really look! And why? Because she had someone else lined up to take my place. That Derek was installed before the trail was cold! Everything's gone swimmingly for her hasn't it? One man disappears another takes his place in her bed and in her life. You should have seen them, they're definitely a married couple already, I could have sworn that when he came over to our table, he nearly said 'wife' instead of 'fiancée'."

I was fulminating yet again and Trish was taking it all patiently. She had taken me to her bed as soon as I arrived and made gentle love to me for hours before even asking the question. In fact it wasn't a question but a statement.

"You've seen Ann, and you've remembered."

So I had to tell her the whole story. I recounted how my memories had cascaded into my mind overwhelmingly. Now, having exhausted my diatribe, she had time to speak herself. She didn't try to change my mind; she didn't offer any solutions. I knew I would have done in her place and that's what I was waiting for.

"Allan, you've had a terrible shock. You're suffering from overload, and you're bereaved in the worst possible way."

My love for her surged. She understood me, she knew what I was going through. We'd risen from her marathon love in, and we'd eaten a lovely meal she'd prepared for me and I hardly tasted it. As soon as we began to eat I'd launched into the whole thing again, and from her there was no reproach, no sign of disappointment.

"Time for bed," was all she said next. "Tomorrow we have all day. You have a lot of healing to do."

It was early to retire, but retire we did and as she folded me in her arms I fell at once into a deep and dreamless sleep, at least I had no recollection of any dreams.

The next morning as I came to consciousness, the bed was empty and the sun was shining. It was late, very late, almost not morning at all. I stumbled to the lavatory to relieve my aching bladder, and when I returned after splashing my face with cold water, Trish was sitting in bed displaying her wonderfully neat breasts, and sipping a mug of tea. Mine was on my side and I did likewise, including displaying my breasts, which did not measure up to hers at all.

When the mugs were empty we hunkered down into the bed, and she idly began to trace patterns over my body, my face and my head. The feeling was almost soporific and there was no world anywhere else but there in her arms. She was my universe at that moment, and everything else simply faded away.

When I was totally relaxed, her hand glided over my quiescent penis, her fingers featherlike on the very tip. It grew, and her head went down and she bestowed kiss after kiss on my now erect member, up and down the sides and gossamer touches of her lips on the tip and the rest of the glans. Nothing mattered in the world at all, but the exquisite feeling of her loving lips.

It was strange that at that moment I realised that I had not thought about Ann that morning, nor about the first meeting with her, until then, and the thought aroused no angry or depressive feelings at all. It was as if those events were in another world. That world did not matter; only this world mattered, where this loving woman was healing me gently with her mouth.

My eyes were closed, and then it was no longer her mouth, but something much warmer, and it enveloped my penis entirely with a soft embrace. I opened my eyes and she was straddled over me, keeping her weight off but slowly riding me up and down so gently that it did not excite unduly, but gave an intense sensation of her vaginal walls. Her eyes were closed and she seemed lost in her own world.

This went on for a long time until I began to want release and moved my hips up to meet her sinking down. Immediately her eyes opened and she smiled, rolling off me and pulling me over her. She held my cock and directed it to her pussy and I slipped back into her slick and welcoming channel. Then we moved together with more purpose, my strokes were deepening and her upward thrusts more active and soon we were moving fast and hard.

I saw the flush spread over her chest and she began to pant, until suddenly she held her breath. She became still, rigid, and her hands clenched the bed. Then came the release; she bucked and groaned and shook and cried out in a wordless affirmation of the intensity racking her lithe body, then she twitched a whole body twitch again and again, each time accompanied by a guttural sound which seemed to come from her very core. I rode her as her body shook seeming as if it wanted to shake me off. As her movements gentled, I came myself, deeply and thoroughly, feeling the life-force gush all along my cock before it burst in spurts into her.

"Yes," she gasped, just once, and I collapsed onto her.

We lay supine and spent as the sun's light became hazy. Then she pushed me off her and we lay wrapped round each other's bodies. Did we sleep awhile? I think so, because I became aware of her leaving the bed and disappearing into the bathroom, and following that, the uniquely musical tinkle of a woman passing water. She came back to the bed, leant over me, her breasts hanging deliciously, and kissed me long and gently. I kissed back and fondled her paps, running my fingers over her nips and making her exhale with pleasure.

"Come on, my lover," she murmured, "Let's get out of here or the day will be gone."

She took me to the coast again, driving my car which she loved, and we walked along the sand muffled against the cold as we'd done before. A sea fret had rolled in and its cold damp fingers, coupled with the lack of visibility, made the sound of the waves eerie, invisible as they were. The brisk exercise was like an exorcism, purging with the biting cold of the North East coast all my pent up feelings, and complementing the gentle loving exercise of the morning.

I said nothing and indeed I didn't think much either. I wanted to stay in this other misty world, with this wonderful loving woman who as always had taken such comprehensive care of me and seemed to know exactly what my body and spirit needed.

She spoke little either, save to avert to the foghorn from the Whitley Bay Lighthouse, and the other sounds drifting from Tynemouth harbour and the river mouth. We ate an evening meal at a pub and then she drove me home.

The evening was spent listening to music and playing scrabble, a game she loved to distraction, and which she usually won comprehensively. We fell into bed with that clean exhaustion that comes from good exercise in the cold and a warm evening's mental exercise.

As I drifted off, her arm across my hip and mine under her neck, her head on my shoulder, I fleetingly wondered why she'd said nothing about my trauma. It did not worry or concern me and I think I must have gone to sleep smiling.

We both awoke relatively early on Sunday morning, and after a visit each to the loo, made love in a business-like manner, totally the opposite from Saturday's marathon. We both wished to give the other a satisfying orgasm, playing each other's body with considerable success, and flopped back onto our backs shining with perspiration and panting with our exertion. We each turned our heads to the other.

"Good." I said

"Yes." She said.

Then we got up and after a breakfast of cereal and toast were on the road to the Cheviots for a long bracing walk, lunch at a pub near the Roman Wall, and a relaxing drive back.

In the early evening she took me to meet her colleagues at the hospital watering hole, most of whom I had not seen for a while. It was the usual mix of gossip, anecdotes and ribald humour. Everyone was relaxed and that helped me. I felt a warm glow, fuelled no doubt by the pints which were going down with reckless rapidity, but also by the lack of any of that emotional intensity which characterised life back in Sale.

I say everyone was relaxed. There was one who looked anything but. When I went to return some of what I had gained from the bar in the gentleman's washroom, the worried one followed me. He was a muscular young man with a handsome face and a shock of red hair. We stood at the stalls side by side.

"Allan," he said, looking straight ahead.

"Yes?" I answered in like manner.

"I'm Tim."

"Oh. Pleased to meet you. "

"That it?"

"Yes. I'd shake you hand, but I've got my hands full at the moment," I gave a short laugh at my own joke.

"But--"

"Look Tim," I said gently, "what you and Trish did together caused her to feel guilty as hell. I told her at the time that she was not under any obligation of faithfulness to me, but she then said she wanted to be faithful while our relationship lasts. That's fine with me as well. I've no real claim on her; she's done more for me than anyone, so I'm grateful for whatever she gives me. It seems she wants to stay monogamous until she goes to New Zealand. So don't worry."

"Oh, that's a relief!" he sighed. "I was worried you'd be miffed by our fling."

"As I said, don't worry about it."

He was a nice enough bloke. I almost advised him to improve his sexual technique but resisted the impulse.

We returned to the group.Trish gave an enquiring look; I smiled and she looked relieved.

When we got back to her flat she got out the whisky and we sat, not together on the sofa, she sitting in the armchair.

"OK, Allan. How do you feel?"

I thought about it.

"I feel good. I needed to relax, things were pretty tense at work as I settled in and got to know Jenny better as well. Then there's the ongoing search for the bastards who did this to me; 'the three' are working so hard on that, and I feel a little stressed that they're spending so much time on me.

"Then David pulled this stunt with Ann at the restaurant. I think that it has all been too much. You've given me a great weekend, but you've said nothing about this Ann business. As usual you've done exactly the right thing. I feel much better."

"And the Ann business?"

I thought again, "I'm not livid with anger any more; there are other emotions but I've not been bothered to sort them out."

"You're going back tomorrow. I want to say some things about the Ann business. That OK with you?"

"Of course," I sighed. "You've more right than most to give advice."

"I'm not sure I want to give you advice. I want to state some things I've been mulling over, not just this weekend either."

"Ok, fire away."

"I think you already know everything I'm going to say.

"Before you met Ann you had a detached attitude. Now it's different. You know exactly what's been taken away from you so it becomes personal. Most of what we've talked about is full of questions. Why didn't Ann look for you for longer? Why did she shack up so quickly with this Derek man? Does she still miss you? How will she react to your new face and body?"

"I know that one. She pities me and finds it revolting. I saw the look on her face."

"Another question then; if she knew it was you would that change her attitude? Personally, speaking as a woman I think it would make all the difference in the world."

Trish wasn't the first to say that.

"Well, she'll be married soon," I replied, "and she's obviously happy in her new life. She'll have to live with it; I've had to. She's being vindictive about the financial settlement; that's a side of her I don't remember."

"That's because she thinks you've dumped her for another woman. She thinks you cheated on her. If she's still angry I think it shows she still has very strong feelings for you.

"Another thing. Think of all those years she gave you, don't you think those years and all that love deserves that she knows the truth, and that before the wedding? Is it fair she's marrying with a dreadful misconception? Whether you finally part and she marries him or she calls off the wedding, she should do it with full knowledge of the facts."

Once again Trish was talking eminent sense into me. I'd been wrapped up in my own anger and resentment. Ann may not ever get my love again but she deserved justice and the full facts. I became aware of Trish's anxious face waiting for my response.

"Trish, as usual, you're right. How d'you manage to be right all the time? I need to meet her and tell her the whole thing. I've not worked out what I feel about her yet. My mind's a jumble, though thanks to you and what you've done this weekend, I feel at ease with it. There's time. I'll see her when I get back from Vancouver."

There was an imperceptible pause, before she asked with a nonchalant air, "Jenny going with you?"

So she did care!

"Yes."

Another pause, longer this time.

"Look Allan," she spoke quietly, "I know all about the professional relationship thing but if she comes on to you, go with the flow. You're practically divorced and I'm leaving soon. She sounds a sweet girl."

"You won't mind?" I asked incredulously.

"Of course I'll mind!" she scolded. "That's not the point. She's going to be here and I'm not; I've got to let you go. I've always been ready for you to go back to Ann, and if that's not going to happen I'd prefer you to have someone else."

"I still think affairs between colleagues are a bad idea. When or if they finish how do you continue to work together? She's my PA, Trish. Any move away from me would be demotion, or she would have to leave. I can't leave; I own the bloody place!"

"Yes, I see that. All I'm saying is, if she's willing to risk all that, go with it. And you can talk about it beforehand you know, I did with you; I told you it was no strings sex."

"But it wasn't. It isn't, is it?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "OK, it was when we started out, but yes, you win! I wouldn't have it any other way, even though it hurts leaving you."

We went to bed and made missionary love and then fell asleep in each other's arms as we usually did. We both got up at the same time, 5.30am, so she could get to work. I stayed longer and had a cup of coffee before getting into the car and driving back to the mix up at home.

I drove straight into work. When I got to my office there was no one there, but Judy put her head round the door and told me Jenny was with Geoff, so I wandered down to Geoff's office, which used to be mine. I entered without knocking and found the two of them hunched over a number of pieces of A3 paper.

"Better late than never," said Geoff, with a smile.

Jenny smiled too, but it was more a welcome than an appreciation of his humour.

He continued, "These are the specs for the component we are hoping Glencoe Industries will want. You know you go on Wednesday?"

"Yes, let me see," and I joined them.

Geoff began to speak, but I stopped him.

"Let Jenny explain it to me."

She flushed and looked uncertain.

"Go on," said Geoff. "Tell him. Sell it to him."

She did. She had mastered the technical details and knew the limits of the component parts and how the unit would fit into the larger machines they were wanting to make. She was hesitant at first, but as she went on she became more confident and by the time she reached the price she was motoring, but the price was way too high.

"Too expensive. I couldn't pay that much for it. Can you produce it more cheaply?" I said.

"That's the cost to you for one," she said. "It's patented and you can see it's technically advanced, and though we'd get a small fee for each one you had made elsewhere we need to protect our own profits."

We entered into a haggling round in which she brought in discounts on a sliding scale for quantity and ended with a handsome profit for us and a good deal for them.

"I'm impressed," I said brightly. "OK, Jenny. You handle the sales pitch and the initial agreement and I'll tweak the contract at the end."

"Are you sure?" she asked, suddenly looking uncertain, but Geoff beamed.

"Positive," I asserted. "You know all there is to know about it. You pitched it perfectly to me, and of course there'll be a commission if you make the sale. Can you put a PowerPoint presentation together for the meeting?"

Of course she could. What a silly question! All that was in the tone of voice used for a simple 'Yes'.

She went off to do the job armed with the papers, but Geoff stopped me following.

"Allan," he smiled, "you haven't lost your touch. Always giving people chance to grow. She'll do you proud."

"I think so, she's very talented."

"By the way, Victor Belling, the president of the company and its original owner before it went public, knows you. You got on very well about six months before you were attacked. He came here looking for us to develop this piece. You two had a great time. He was very taken with Ann. He'll get quite a shock when he sees you."

"Geoff, I've a feeling I've been to Vancouver before. Is that right?"

"No. As far as I know, you've never been there."

Ah well, you win some and you lose some!

I had physio that evening; oh the virtue of going private! You can go when you want. The next morning Jenny and I went through her presentation and collected a prototype. For something that was at the core of controlling a large manufacturing process and assessing quality, it was very small!

We checked our tickets and I found she had organised everything for the trip, including a very swish hotel on the Waterfront in Vancouver. We left work at lunchtime to pack; Geoff's blessing in our ears.

I was packing when David phoned.

"Sorry to tell you this old friend, but I got the Decree Absolute this morning. You're no longer married."

I felt nothing. "OK, thanks David," I said at length.

"You ok?"

"Yes, David, I'm fine. I knew it was coming. It doesn't mean a lot to me. She's decided on a new life long since. I'm settling in nicely at work. I've got Trish and a superb PA who's coming to Canada with me. Ann and I have separate lives now, though I'll have to see her about access to the kids."

My feelings were growing and were different, but I suppressed them.

"As soon as you get back?" he asked.

"Yes."

------

FIFTEEN

It was a long journey, even if you discounted the three-hour check in. We left at about two o'clock and arrived at about four after travelling for over nine hours non-stop. We got a taxi to the Waterfront Hotel and checked in.

Here I was in for a surprise. We were booked into a suite on some impossibly high floor, and when we reached the suite it had only one bedroom, with two queen-size beds.

Jenny looked embarrassed. "I hope you don't mind. There are two beds, and this was the only suite they had available."

I smiled. The thought of seeing this beauty in her night attire and possibly her underwear was not doing me any harm at all!

"No, Jenny, that'll be fine, as long as you're comfortable with the idea."

"Oh, yes," she answered, visibly relieved. "Boys and girls always shared when I was at University and we went away. We never thought it was strange."

I wondered how many of these innocent room sharings ended in hot sex in only one of the beds. Well, that wouldn't happen here, I thought. This is too good a relationship to mess up by getting personal.

We were tired. It may have been five pm there but our clocks told us it was after one in the morning. I suggested we nap for a couple of hours and then have dinner. I booked dinner for seven thirty and got a wake-up call as well. Then I lay down, fully dressed. Jenny did the same on the other bed. We hardly looked at the view from the large picture window.

Coming to when the wakeup call came was excruciating. It was like being woken suddenly in the middle of the night. We both struggled to our feet and used the bathroom consecutively. I looked out over the water looking at the lights reflected in the water. I could see why people fall in love with Vancouver.