They Fuck Horses, Don't They?byDeborah©
Deborah is a country girl. She rides horses, among other varieties of animals with large members. Like certain human males. But only if they beg like a dog. Suzy is a city girl. She rides a Harley and loves the vibrating machine between her legs.
“Deborah,” Suzy whined, “you know I don’t know the difference between a horse's ass, a cow's ass and a man's ass. You know, an asshole. So I'm supposed to know what to do when all these frigging animals get loose? I would just as soon mow them down with my Harley. You know, road kill, dinner for the country folk. Why do you make fun of me when I chase the chase the cows with a big stick, going 'moo moo' and pretend I’m chewing my cud?"
“You wouldn’t understand, Suzy. It’s a genetic thing.”
The girls were hanging out at Deborah's house, only because Deborah has a pool and a bunch of cool computer stuff. Like a Snappy and a Dazzle digital video creator.
"What, make our own skin flicks?" they giggled in unison as if they were struck by lightning or a bright idea. Doh!
Deborah and Suzy lounged poolside getting a real even tan. Deborah, the pale face who came closest to a tan with several cases of sun poisoning sat under an umbrella reading her bible, naked. Preparing her fire and brimstone spiel for this Sunday’s sermon. Suzy stretched out on a towel on the deck getting darker and darker, all over. You couldn't see much of anything from the road unless they stood up.
All of a sudden they heard a commotion. Two dudes in a red Dodge Ram 4wd extended cab pickup pulled into the driveway. The dogs barked liked crazy. The dudes seemed somewhat panicked. They jumped out of the truck and start yelling something about a stampede.
Suzy woke up from her nap, jumped up on the deck wall, her boobs hanging over, and said, "What the fuck is all the noise about?"
Deborah draped a towel over as much of her as possible and walked over to the dudes. "What the hell is your problem? And quit mumbling. Speak in plain English."
Just then the towel that draped Deborah fell off and the dudes mumbled even more.
Suzy got pissed and took the Glock 26 out of her little purse, slipped her bikini back on and strolled over to the truck. But then she saw the Harley on the back of the truck. So she got nice in a real hurry.
"What's the problem, guys?" she said in her sweet young thing voice.
One of the dudes replied, “There are cows and horses running all over the road. Are those yours?"
"No," Deborah responded, "the neighbor's and they get loose all the time and we better go round them up before somebody makes a hamburger out of my girlfriend Teresa’s pets. She’s not home.”
Well, Suzy, Scott and Gavin definitely never did the rodeo. Deborah watched their feeble attempts at rounding up this herd and laughed so hard she would have wet her panties, had she been wearing any. Just the towel, remember? Finally she had enough of this comedy act and fetched the rope. And she roped those cows one by one and led them back into the penned up area. The stallion didn’t even need to be roped, he followed right behind her, very close behind her.
“How did you do that, Deborah?” Scott asked incredulously.
“They fuck horses, don’t they?” Gavin whispered, intended for Scott’s eyes only.
“I heard that you fucking pervert!” Deborah screamed. “Watch it or I’ll turn you into a gelding.”
When all the critters had been rounded up, they walked on back across the road to Deborah's house and stood in the driveway chatting.
"Hey, you guys are all sweaty,” Deborah commented. “Why, I have no idea. You didn't do much. You want to go for a swim?"
Gavin stammered, "But we don't have our swim suits."
With that, Deborah let the towel slip off. She stood in the driveway, naked. Just then a car passed by and the driver swerved onto the berm and almost ran off the road.
“So we’ll all go for a skinny dip,” Suzy suggested demurely.
A few minutes later they all had shed everything but their birthday suits and frolicked in and around the pool.
“Hey, you guys grab some beers in the cooler on the deck,” Deborah offered.
They grabbed and grabbed. Every time Scott or Gavin would get out of the pool to get another brew, Suzy and Deborah would whistle and make dirty comments. The dudes seemed so shy at first the girls thought it kinda cute. The shyness soon changed to something more like incredible lust.
Scott and Suzy talked about Harleys. Gavin and Deborah talked about the bible. They discussed various theories regarding who Cain married. Deborah told Gavin, quite the heathen, the story of Cain's mate Lilith and how and why she invented fellatio.
Gavin became quite aroused which appeared obvious to all.
"I have to pee," Gavin whined.
"Please not in the water!” Deborah insisted. “This pool is protected by pee detector. You know, it makes the water turn red. C'mon, I'll show you where the bathroom is."
Deborah got out of the water, grabbed her towel and her bible. And the rope, the rope she lassoed those critters with.
Suzy knew all about Deborah's rope tricks. She knew Deborah and Gavin would not be back for quite some time. She said to Scott, "Hey, does that Harley on the back of your truck run?" It was a beautiful machine: a bored out Sporty with an S&S Short carb, Spitfires in the hole. A stretched Sportbob tank and enough chrome if not to get home, at least in somebody’s bed.
Scott replied, "Usually. Let's go see if I can get it up."
They walked over and got the bike off the truck. Scott got on, started it right up.
“Get your ass on up behind me.”
Suzy frowned and Scott knew what she wanted. He said, "What, I suppose you want the top, too. Just get your ass on up behind me."
Suzy did so reluctantly but only after pouting and retorting, "Fuck you!"
"No," Scott replied, "fuck you and I am going to give you a ride on this Harley you will never ever forget." With that he screamed out of the driveway in a cloud of dust with Suzy hanging on for dear life.
Riding naked was a new experience for Scott, though not for Suzy. Scott seemed a little nervous about the neighbors and their instincts for calling cops, but no sirens blared.
Suzy began to get wet. Not just the bike’s vibrations, but riding naked with some stud she’d just met was virgin, so to speak, territory. She lowered her hands from the hair of Scott’s chest to something even harder than the bars he held. Her gentle caress began to intensify.
After several minutes and miles like this Scott turned and said to Suzy “Sorry darlin’, but this has been done before. It happened to me on I-81 in ’91. Use your imagination.”
Suzy seemed a little pissed that Scott would act so nonchalant about the first rate hand job she administered, but then she saw the challenge. Hell, even a missionary does it in the missionary position. This started her bent and horny mind to working.
As Scott started to jerk the throttle to wake Suzy out of her clit-tingling daydream, the idea hit her. She tapped Scott on the shoulder to let him know to smooth out the throttle. When she was ready, Suzy stood up on the pegs and stepped her right foot over to the left foot peg, then took her left foot and stepped over Scott and placed her left foot on the right peg.
Scott looked into a dripping snatch that would make the Pope forget his vow of celibacy. He gently stuck out his tongue and licked her from bottom to top, savoring the sharp tasting dew.
Suzy shuddered and Scott realized that riding and eating snatch while a gorgeous girl stood above him as he steered a rapidly moving Harley was definitely fun, but quite dangerous. The last thing Scott wanted was a wrecked bike and road rash on his cock, so he told her to sit down.
“Yo, bitch, sit your ass down. I can’t fucking see the road.”
Now Suzy may be young, but not stupid. She sat right down on Scott’s cock; one stroke, to the hilt, completely filled.
The moan let out by both could be heard over the noise of the straight pipes of the bike.
While looking under her arm, Scott sucked on Suzy’s amazingly firm and round breasts. She rocked back and forth over Scott’s lap, grinding her clit over his crotch, taking her to another level. Somehow it just slipped inside her by accident.
Scott realized that Suzy might be close to turning her brain to tapioca with sensory and exotic overload, so he turned onto an old dirt road with washboards that would be at home on a SuperCross track. This caused both Suzy and Scott to buck wildly up and down as Scott refused to let off the gas.
Two miles later Scott had no choice but to slow down due to his own impending orgasm. Suzy seemed about fucked out, Scott’s cock filling her insides, her ass slamming up and down on the gas tank, her tit’s scraping up and down Scott’s hairy chest, and all on a moving Harley. If she had fantasies in her fantasies, this would be it.
As they both come down from their climax, Suzy lay back on the tank and let her head and hair hang off the handle bars. Scott laid back over the seat with his head on the license plate. His cock dwindled, but still in Suzy’s hot, wet, and fulfilled pussy.
Scott did have the good sense to drop the kickstand when he finally stopped. They both lay there enjoying the moment and trying to decide if what happened really happened.
It didn’t take too long for the license plate to start to cut into Scott’s head and for Suzy’s neck to stiffen, even if Scott’s didn’t, heh, heh. They decided to head back. Suzy told Scott to cut through one of the pastures back to Deborah’s house.
When they got back, they peeled themselves from the wet, sticky bike and jumped into the pool to cool off. Steam rose from the water when they jumped in.
And then Scott kissed her.
“Ah,” Suzy moaned, “maybe I was wrong when I complained about being fucked but not kissed.”
Romance finally? Well, maybe, but Suzy wondered if perhaps it was a kiss of gratitude. As in, thanks for the great piece of ass.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch. Gavin felt a little like being in a dream as Deborah escorted him into her pad to take a tinkle. All that beer eventually had to go somewhere, sooner or later. But, being led to the john by a beautiful naked woman is not bad work if you can get it.
Poor Gavin never realized that any preachers were like Deborah … young, sexy and vavoom! He would not have lived so long in darkness had he realized that they were not all like Oral Roberts or “Bobnose” Schuller. Certainly Deborah’s tutelage poolside had awakened a religious feeling in Gavin. He thought he felt enlightened and religious inspiration for sure. His large manhood throbbed with excitement and his heavy hanging oysters swung free and happy.
“Why is it that they have to hang, when Dick did the shooting?” Deborah asked in jest.
“Is that in the bible?” Gavin inquired.
“Why don’t you get in the shower, Gavin honey, you poor heathen boy, and wash off all that chlorine off your nice hunky body,” Deborah said in her most sultry voice, and it sounded much more like a demand than a question.
What, thought Gavin, am I going to baptized? Well, why not? Gavin, naked as a jaybird and being offered shower facilities by an equally naked fox, was no fool. When Deborah stepped in the shower behind him, Gavin thought … Oh hell it must be time to wake up! But poor Gavin didn’t awaken or awoken or whatever.
“Just relax big guy. Haven’t you ever heard of the ‘laying on of hands’ darling?” the nice lady whispered in Gavin’s ear as she reached around and grabbed his membrum viril.
“Let go big guy. This gal has wanted to play firewoman for a long time! Wheee this is fun! Too bad this isn’t snow and I could try writing my name. Ding, ding. My God, how much beer did you two guys chug down!?” Deborah exclaimed, calling on the Lord for inspiration and guidance as she hosed down Gavin’s big hose.
Meanwhile, our Gavin reached his own hands back and around Deborah’s nice ass, and kneaded her buns as she lent him a hand. Deborah needed only one hand to manipulate the golden showers in her shower. The other hand was free to close on bulging balls that she balanced and bounced with her fingers.
“Ummm Big Guy, good thing for you I am not a cannibal. Otherwise, I might like to have a ball, or two actually,” Deborah moaned lasciviously as she juggled the jewels, even as she rubbed her own “Holy of Holies” on Gavin’s tight buns.
“Gavin,” purred Deborah, “Remember what I was telling you about Lilith, Cain’s squeeze? I told you how she bred a race of go-gettem demonic bitches who never met a man they didn’t invite to dinner, and the man was on the menu.”
At this point Gavin’s religious conversion really could not be disguised. Deborah now had a handful of challenge and straddled one of his muscular legs, and worked up her own religious fervor. Her divine pussy was sliding on his wet leg and likewise her inspirational breasts on his back.
“I don’t know big boy, but a Lilith demon might not be all that bad. She might have the right idea,” Deborah told Gavin as she gripped his waist and spun him around and back against the shower wall.
For a lady of the cloth, Deborah had a rather demonic gleam in her eye and as she glared into poor Gavin’s eyes and she licked her lips very suggestively. Those eyes moved slowly down poor Gavin’s trembling body.
Deborah reached outside the shower door and picked up the rope she had hung on the handle. Gavin had briefly wondered about the cleats screwed into the wall of the shower stall. They sure didn’t look like towel holders.
“Good thing for you I am not really a Lilith, or am I Gavin?” Deborah asked with a giggle as she finished restraining the big guy’s wrists and ankles with her cowgirl rope.
“Don’t worry Gavin, you are in no real danger. Later on I am going to need that big cock of yours for more than playing firewoman. I need it to fulfill my ‘Inner Sanctum’ darling. But right now, I want to give you a religious experience you will never forget, and we can’t have you jumping around can we? This isn’t the Benny Hinn show.”
Deborah turned off the shower and started to nibble on poor Gavin’s nipples. Her legs seemed to turn to rubber and down she went. All Gavin could do, all tied up and such, was to just grin and take it like a man. If this was a dream it sure felt good.
“My God … thank you!” Gavin started chanting over and over. Oh God, oh God, oh God!”
Deborah could read his mind but she didn’t say anything. It would not have been polite under the circumstances, or worth the effort, because who can understand mumbling except those who babble in tongues.
Suzy, Deborah, Scott and Gavin had so much fun on this outing they planned a picnic together to mark the end of summer. All you can eat and fun games! Box lunches, big fat pickles and a spanking good time!
“What the hell is the meat in this burger?” Gavin asked. “Venison?”
“They shoot horses don’t they?”
“That movie was about a marathon dance, Deborah.”
“Let’s have our own marathon,” Deborah cooed, with a wink in Suzy’s direction, “a fucking marathon.”
And they did and nobody dropped out for long for days.
A couple weeks later Scott and Gavin, both suffering from a rare Hawaiian disease called lackanooky, returned to the scene of the orgy. Suzy and Deborah just ignored them, singing …
“A horse is a horse of course of course, and no one can talk to a horse of course. That is of course unless the horse Is the famous Mister Ed!
Go right to the source and ask the horse. He’ll give you the answer that you’ll endorse He’s always on a steady course. Talk to Mister Ed!
People yakkity-yak a streak And waste your time of day, but Mister Ed will never speak unless he has something to say!
A horse is a horse of course of course, And this one’ll talk ‘til his voice is hoarse. You never heard of a talking horse? Well, listen to this …”
“Hey girls,” Scott interrupted, “I see you have your own horse now. What’s his name? He looks like a he. My God that thing is big!”
“His name is Mister Ed,” Suzy responded. He rides a surf board, flys an airplane and can sing anything the Beatles ever recorded.”
“And he fucks like a mink!” Deborah exclaimed.
Scott and Gavin left feeling dejected and rejected and still throbbing painfully from the lackanooky, vowing to each other to immediately investigate penis enlargement.
A couple weeks later Scott and Gavin returned to the scene of the orgy again, their dicks bigger but hurting more from the lackanooky than ever. Mister Ed had passed away. His head was mounted on the wall in the den.
“Hey, what happened to Mister Ed?” Scott asked. “He sure looked healthy and hard the last time we saw him.”
“We think he had a heart attack from over-exertion,” Suzy responded.
“Now you have an elephant?” Gavin inquired incredulously. “We saw him out back.”
“And you should see what he can do with his trunk!” Suzy and Deborah squealed.
* * * * *
(Stay tuned for the sequel to this story entitled “Keep on Trunking.” Obviously I didn’t write this horseshit all by myself. This is a collaboration and with who is a secret. But I’ll tell you this, I never had so much fun riding bareback.)