Thought Bubbles Kill Ch. 02

After leaving Dave's apartment that day, I was like a zombie. I did everything in my power to forget what had just happened. I went by the library and buried myself in books, but still my thoughts were constantly drawn back to the feeling of Dave's hands on my body. I hid away in the library for most of the day. I had assumed that if he really wanted to come find me, he'd know where to look. He knew when I was really upset, I always went to the library to clear my head. I hadn't seen him, so I knew I was safe. When it got dark outside, I went home walking at fast pace when I passed Dave's door. Okay, so I was running...whatever. That night, I discovered that he had become the new star of my wet dreams. Sandy Taylor, the sexiest girl on campus and the girl I had been pining for since middle school, had been replaced by Dave. What the fuck? I was a wreck. I awoke to the feeling of drying cum on my lower belly. I cursed myself for once in my short life for having a wet dream. Surprisingly, Dave acted as if nothing had ever happened. Dave knocked on my door so we could to class together like normal. I was jumpy as hell and, though I'm sure he noticed, he didn't mention it. It certainly didn't help that we had most of our classes together. While Mr. Brailer droned on about atomic and molecular structure, my mind was on Dave and how his forearm was touching mine on the desk we shared. I gulped audibly, shutting my eyes tight and trying to will away the erection that was forming in my skinny jeans. Had my eyes been open, I would have seen the saddened look in Dave's eyes as he moved his arm away. Needless to say, it was the most uncomfortable ninety-five minutes of my life.

As usual, after class we went to the cafeteria to eat lunch. I tried not to notice the giant purple elephant that seemed to follow us into the room. I failed. I was visibly trembling and tripping over my own feet, and I didn't know where to look. And my arms...my arms were twitchy traitors that wouldn't seem to stay in my lap and instead shot to my arm to tug at my favorite wristband or brush my hair out of my eyes in quick jerky movements every five seconds. I groaned inwardly. Fuck my life. I didn't have to look up to know that Dave was watching me. Finally, when I couldn't take his scrutiny anymore, I allowed my eyes to flicker up. My brown eyes met with piercing green orbs. Suddenly, I was mesmerized. "Seth, I'm sorry about yesterday. I don't know what came over me," He said softly. The look on his face was unreadable, kind of distant and sad. Maybe I wasn't the only one affected by this new tension after all. "I'll understand completely if you never want to speak to me again." With that and before I could even try to protest, he stood and was walking out of the cafeteria without another word. Why didn't I say anything? I wanted to, I wanted to stop him. To tell him it's okay and that maybe I wanted what happened to happen again. But, damn it all, it was like a jawbreaker was lodged in my throat. So I stayed there in the cafeteria, alone with Dumbo breathing down my neck, staring at my untouched food. Ugh, Seth you're such an idiot.

That night as I walked down the hall of the apartment complex, I passed Dave's door hesitantly. I debated with myself on whether I should knock on his door and throw myself onto him and have him do to me everything I dreamt about last night (I shudder)...or I could just continue walking on by. The latter seemed to be the more sane way to go. Unlocking and opening the front door, I was presented with the sight of 'her' and some guy (who, I'm certain, assumed he was getting some serious nookie tonight) having a make out session on the couch. I almost retched, thinking to myself, 'If only you knew where that mouth has been, buddy'. Looking at her now, one certainly wouldn't be able to tell that once she had been one of the best lawyers in the state. Funny how people change. Distinguished lawyer to elegant whore. I quickly run up to my room and slam my door shut. I stripped out of my clothes and bounced onto my bed. Staring at the ceiling, my thoughts shifted back to Dave. His piercing green eyes, the cute dimple in his cheek that I never noticed before, how it felt to pressed up against his body. What's happening to me? Admit it, you liked it! The voice came from somewhere deep inside me, screaming it. I shut my eyes tight, pushed the thoughts away. Usually when I'm like this, I just pick up the phone and call Dave. But now I don't know what to do. Eventually, after much tossing and turning, I fell asleep.

________

We were in his room, in his office chair. Dave's lips were on my neck, nibbling on a very sensitive spot. His arms encircled me and his hand massaging the bulge in my pants. I moaned as he roughly tore off my pants and boxers. He quickly shucked my shirt and threw me onto his bed. He stripped his clothes off, revealing his well-defined six pack and toned muscles. He was 6'1 of raw sexual power and it made me horny as hell. He crawled toward me onto the bed, pure lust and desire clouding his eyes. He looked like a predator hunting its prey. I was the prey. And I loved every minute of it. He snapped my legs open and moved in between them. Suddenly, his mouth engulfed me. I moaned loudly and shot up into a sitting position, my hands moving to grasp his head. His tongue laved at the helmet of my cock while his hand massaged my balls. I quivered in ecstasy. He sucked and lapped at my dick to edge of completion, then just as I was about cum, he stopped. I whimpered in protest. He chuckled and slid up my body. Wrapping my legs around his hips, I looked into his eyes. I knew what was coming next...

I jerked awake, panting. Sweat covered my brow. Cum was splattered on my thigh. I was trembling from one of the most powerful orgasm I've ever had. I collapsed back onto the bed. What is wrong with me?

________

The next morning, as I left out the door, I thought about knocking on Dave's door so we could walk to class together as usual. But instead I decided to cut class and go to the library. I found my favorite spot on the third floor towards the back. I sat on the floor and lost myself in a novel. Suddenly, I was aware of someone standing next to me. I look up to see Todd Singer, one of Dave's football buddies, standing over me. "Where's your bodyguard now, fag?" he asked with a smirk on his face. I wonder if he knows about Dave's bisexuality.

"Hmm...better question. What are you doing in a library? I didn't know apes could read." I said casually before returning back my novel.

"You little bitch, I'll fuck you up," he spat.

"Interesting. Hey, could ya move a little to the left, you're blocking my light. 'K thanks." I knew I was pushing all the wrong buttons, but once I start I can't seem to stop sometimes. I know, I know. Don't feed the beast and all that jazz. He grabbed me by the front of my shirt and slammed me up against an adjacent wall.

"Listen, you piece of shit--," I pushed him off me, picked up my bag, and headed to the other end of the library. I didn't feel dealing with apes and their antics. I was pushed roughly from behind, then once again picked up by the front of my shirt. The first blow got me in the eye, I saw stars.

"Feel better about yourself now, big guy?" I asked, a smile plastered on my face. That pissed him off to no end. He growled (actually growled..!). I knew he was half animal! The second blow landed on my cheek. The next one split my lip. After that, I lost count and receded to my happy place. My happy place was invented way back when I was younger. When 'she' would come home drunk and angry, I wait for her to bust open the door and lunge at me. Then, I would go to my happy place and dream of pink clouds and floating cows. But this time, my happy place was filled with images of Dave. His big, cheeky smile. His bright green eyes. His soft, kissable lips.

And then it was over. I was left on the hard carpet of the library floor. I stood slowly, painfully aware of the new ache up near my ribs. I touched a finger to my lips and saw the blood. I sighed. Me and my big mouth. I went to the bathroom to clean up my busted lip and brush my hair over the big purple bruise that was forming around my left eye. My right had swollen to the size of a small balloon. Boy, don't I look beautiful. I sighed and finished cleaning my face. Then, I went back to my favorite spot and continued reading my novel.

Around five o'clock, I left the library and went to the park. My head was killing me, but I didn't want to go home just yet. I like to spend as much time as I can away from 'her'. I sat down on the swing set, the same swing set at which Dave and I had met, watching the sunset. I can't believe I'd lost my best friend over something so stupid. Why didn't I say anything? Why didn't I tell him that I'm not mad at him, but myself? For first time in many years, I felt the beginning of tears sting my eyes. Damn it. I let the tears flow freely, not having the energy to fight them. A small sob bubbled up in my throat and, before I could stop it, escaped from my mouth. Ugh, why did this thing between us have to happen? Why did I have to like it? Hell, my life was no fairytale, but now that my best friend (and only friend) is gone, it's like my own personal apocalypse had occurred.

"Hey." I jumped about a foot in the air and almost fell of the swing. When I regained my composer, I looked up to find Dave standing near the other swing, his eyes on the ground and his hands on his pockets. He looked as though he'd just fallen out of bed. His shirt wrinkled and his hair a mess of light brown locks barely past his collar. He acted so casual, like he didn't hate me at all. I felt a mass of emotions rush forth, overwhelmed by the impact. The tears continued to flow.

"Hi," I managed to choke out. I shook my hair into my eyes and kept my head down so he wouldn't see my black eye or my swollen cheek.

"Don't cry," he said in a sort stern way, "I've never seen you cry until now and I never want to ever again. So suck it up and quit with all the crocodile tears." I looked up into his bright green eyes and smiled a watery smile. That was Dave-speak for stop crying or you'll break my heart. He smiled back at me, then frowned. That's when I remembered how my face looked. I tried to turn away quickly, but he took my chin in his hand and tilted my face up to meet his own. Anger clouded his handsome face.

"Dave, it's--," I began.

"Who did this to you?" His voice was that deadly calm tone that happens when he's really angry.

"Dave, it doesn't matter. I'm fine. I can handle myself."

"You call this handling yourself?" he barked as he roughly pushed my hair from over my bruised eye.

"Dave, c'mon I'm--"

"Who!?" he barked again. I sighed, knowing he wasn't going to let it go until I told him.

"Fine!" I shouted, throwing up my hands. "Todd. Singer."

"That bastard!" Dave growled menacingly.

"Dave, please, I'm fine. I'm okay," He looked into my eyes, that evil look finally leaving his own.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled before looking down at his feet again. I smiled. That's the Dave I know.

"It's okay, besides...," I hesitated, fiddling with my favorite wristband, "You're not the one who should be apologizing." He looked back up at me. "I'm sorry for the way I've been acting lately. I'm just...confused. I mean, after what happened, I felt insecure and awkward. The truth is I liked what we did. I liked it a lot." I had admitted more than I had wanted, but I didn't care. Dave was talking to me again. I was floating on cloud nine. I looked back at Dave. I couldn't help but laugh when I saw him smiling that big goofy grin. He took my hand and jerked me up from the swing, encompassing me in his arms. I was a bit startled at first, but then I wrapped my arms around him too. "I love you, Seth." It was barely above a whisper but, I heard it clearly. I pulled back a bit and looked up into his eyes, shocked.

"Really?" He nodded. "Since when?"

"Ever since we met," he said softly, and we both glanced back at the swing set.

"And so we meet again," I said, grinning at him. I stood on my tip-toes and placed kiss on his cheek. I just couldn't say it. Sure, I loved Dave as a friend, but...I was still unsure of my feelings. But all of those thoughts were washed away as soon as he drew me back in and kissed me passionately on the lips. I felt as though I was in my happy place, but I knew that this was reality. I'd never been happier. As we pulled apart, my lips tingling, I noticed that the sun had completely set now. We were surrounded in the darkness of night with only the light from the moon and stars, and a few fireflies floating over our heads, like halos. It was like a dream. I felt Dave chuckle, a deep rumble against my cheek.

"What are you doing?" he laughed. That's when I noticed that it wasn't my leg I was pinching.

"Oh! Nothing--I mean, sorry," I said quickly, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. He continued to laugh and eventually we both just fell apart in laughter. We walked back to the apartment complex hand in hand. We stopped at Dave's door.

"Wanna stay over? We could order pizza and watch bad movies all night," Dave asked staring at me with those piercing green eyes. How could I refuse?

"Sure," I replied with a smile. He unlocked the door and led me to his room. Suddenly, I was nervous once again as I remembered what happened last time. What now?