Through the Ages

Closing my eyes, I pinch the bridge of my nose, "Let's suffice it to say that nothing made Jimi happy, at least with me." I feel Akiyo squeeze my shoulder and lightly rub my back. Eyes still clasped shut, the rest comes out a little quiet and rushed. I hadn't really thought about this in years, pushing all of the pain, feelings of inadequacies, and revulsion deep within to an inner vault, wrapped in dozens of chains in hopes that they would never emerge.

"Jimi wasn't a real Dom. He was an aberration. He did not want someone to spend life with as partners, even if that someone was willing to submit everything to him. He wanted complete and utter power over someone. I spent far too long locked there.

It all clicked for me when we were at Jimi's cousin Julia's wedding at the River Walk in San Antonio. It was a small, but lovely affair held outdoors. I remember sitting among the blooming trees along the bank of the river. I watched Julia and her groom up there in front of all of us, glowing, and the way he looked down at her with such adoration. When they kissed, you could feel the mutual love they felt for each other.

All during the reception, I found myself studying this newly married couple, their obvious affection for each other, the closeness they shared. As the evening grew darker, so did my mood. Standing amongst Jimi's family, I looked over at him. He caught me and stared back at me. His eyes were cold, hard, like two emotionless stones. I knew that we had been living a lie, no matter how much I lied to myself about it, and I could not stand it any longer. I turned to Jimi who had not spoken a word to me all evening. In that beautiful setting of candles, flowers, laughter, I snapped. I did not care that his parents were right next to us, nor the other guests scattered closely around. I tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention. I said to him, probably a little too loudly, 'I can't do it anymore. I'm done. I refuse to spend another second with you.' Those around us gasped, and Jimi tried to grab me reaching for my arm, but I stepped back quickly saying, 'Don't even try it. It's over, and you have no control over me anymore.' Maybe, subconsciously, I knew that he would be less likely to make a scene in this setting. Whatever the case was, the River Walk was the turning point in my life for me. After eleven years, and Jimi no longer bothering to even try to hide his infidelities and his contempt of me, for I was nothing more than a servant at this time, I filed for divorce. That was in the year 2000." One salty tear slides down to my lip. I lick it away, while shoving those memories back into the locked box where they belong.

"I'm sorry, Libby." I haven't even noticed that Akiyo has both of my hands clasped in hers.

"Don't be," I have a lopsided grin on my face. "Hey, let's talk about my night with Rodney again. Heaven knows, I love to relive that one over and over and over."

She shakes her dark curls and giggles, "And I don't mind hearing it."

CHAPTER SIX

The hot air and blinding sun actually caresses my skin. After so long bedridden, being able to walk outside is glorious, even if it is close to blazing hot. Today, I get to sleep in my own bed. Akiyo is taking me there now in her sporty little red coupe.

"So, Libby, I stocked the fridge with some easy things to prepare, made a few little dinners so that you don't have to worry about it for a few days either. I straightened up and freshened up your linens so that you can take it easy."

I guffaw, "Haven't I been taking it easy for long enough? You really didn't have to do all of that... but I sure appreciate it. My gosh, Akiyo, it's going to be so different not chatting with you every day. Maybe now you can get that social life since you won't be keeping my old bum company all the time."

"I think that I need to reevaluate my social life now. You've got me all interested in things I never knew of," she winks at me.

"Oh dear, will I have to take you out shopping for a good corset now?" I tease.

"Corset? Do I need one?" she is completely serious.

My eyes roll involuntarily, and I good naturedly pat her shoulder. "You don't need anything, Akiyo. But, if you want to talk or have questions, you know how to find me."

"I hope you know that I will be ringing your phone a lot, and maybe we can do lunch or dinner? Libby, you've become a great friend to me." She is staring straight ahead.

"You too, Akiyo," I decide to lighten the mood. "Are you sure you want to be seen out with an archaic kinkster?"

Her chuckle is a snort, "You're crazy, Libby. Look at you. You are one classy chick," she rummages with one hand in her bag retrieving a silver cylinder with a pink ribbon. "Little gift. Put on that red lipstick, celebrate being a hot momma, Libby."

I pull down her visor to apply the red stain. Well, not too shabby, I laugh inwardly. Though my hair is white, it's perfectly styled. The old skin has its color back and smooth enough with just a few laugh lines around my eyes. I suppose that I have held up pretty well.

There is a sense of contentment as we roll into my driveway. I open the car door, and straighten my black slacks and white top. I have no clue why Akiyo picked this outfit to bring me instead of some of my yoga pants. She has retrieved my little bag from the car and is slowly following me up the walk to the door. I turn the key in the lock opening the door. All the familiar smells float to me letting me know I am indeed free from the sterile hospital and home. I take two steps inside, waiting for Akiyo to follow. Instead, she just places my bag on the floor inside the door.

"Give me a call later, Libby."

I am confused, "You're not coming in? Akiyo, after all you've done, let me fix you something to eat or tea or..."

Akiyo's smile is from ear to ear, all white teeth shining as she peers over my shoulder and shakes her head, "No, Libby, later!" And she turns and skips to her car before I can get another word out.

"Oh well," I close the door and walk around the foyer immersed in the familiarity. I do not even feel as though I have been gone for well over a month. Entering the sitting room, I am stopped in my tracks.

Those forest green eyes, a ghost from the past, a ghost that I never thought I would see again. The years have been especially kind to him, as it is to many men. Though his hair is grayed, and his face a little more weathered, there is no denying him.

"How?" is almost imperceptible.

I am frozen, so he makes the trek to me. He nods to the door, "Your friend, Akiyo, she found me. These young people know all the ways to find anyone with the internet now it seems. You mentioning that you remembered that I was from Toronto, helped narrow the search, I guess, according to her. I'm glad she did find me," he smiles, and his face is warm and shows an authentic happiness. "We had quite a few interesting conversations, Libby. You see, I thought there was no chance for me after that night. I approached Jimi, hoping the two of you were not seriously attached. I wanted to somehow steal you away from him. He made it clear that you were his. In fact, he told me that you were married to him, and that night was a special circumstance. He told me I was to never come near you again. If I had known that he was lying and you were not married yet, nothing could have stopped me from pursuing you, Libby." Rodney raises a single perfect red rose between us. "Through all of these years, I have never stopped thinking about you and that night." The velvet petals stroke my cheek as his words flow like warm water over my skin. "When, Akiyo expressed that you, perhaps felt the same and suggested that I come, I didn't hesitate. I meant it when I told you were flawless, and I wanted you, Libby. I still do."

My breathing is labored, short little airy gasps, and it has absolutely nothing to do with the condition that I have suffered through. His fingers hold the blood red rose to me in offering. Gently I steal it away and breathe in its heady fragrance.

"Libby?" his voice is stern.

"Yes," I nod.

Rodney's hands travel to his waist around the buckle of his black leather belt, beginning to loosen it. "I'd like to take up where we left off."

Through the ages, I never thought I would be able to say this to him again, "Yes, Sir. Thank you."

THE END