TJ Ch. 08

While Mark was putting himself away, John stood up. Mark looked at John sheepishly and said, "I didn't mean to say that a while ago. I'm not gay. I'm sorry." And he honestly did look sorry.

John looked at him and I thought I might've seen a human emotion cross his face and even reach his eyes. I think Mark saw it too. That is until his resting bitch face returned and he said, "I just had your dick in my mouth and you shot down my throat. That's pretty gay."

"I'm not gay. I don't know why I let you do that. I told you earlier while we were inside I was straight. I knew what you wanted to do when you invited me out here. I don't know why I didn't stop you. But, I'm not gay."

"Look, whatever. I think when you get head from a guy, you're pretty fucking gay." John then turned to us and asked, "Don't y'all agree?"

I barked out a laugh and said, "Wow, you really can be a judgmental bitch. There's more than gay, straight, or bi."

He scoffed. "What-the-fuck-ever." He turned to Mark. "Umm, Mike, right? Well, I hope you enjoyed it. I'm going inside. Bye."

"His name is Mark, fuck-twat. I think it's time for you to leave. Now."

"I'm gone. Teej, go to hell. Mark, or Mike, or who the fuck ever you are, hope you had fun. It was probably the best head you've ever had. Right Sean-babe? I think you need to get rid of this pathetic excuse of nothing and call me tomorrow. Or tonight when you get home, I'll be at Stacey's."

That's when I lost my shit and was about to launch myself at the cum-stain. Before I could tackle him and wail on his face, Sean wrapped his arms around me. His voice was full of I-don't-know-what-sexy gruffness when he said, "If you know what's good for you, John, you'll head to Stacey's car and wait for her there. I won't be calling you tomorrow, or tonight, or ever. Goodbye."

Wow, ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present- my boyfriend in full-on Alpha-male mode. I think I had a hard-on by the time he was about half-way through the first sentence. I'm not sure if it was from the tone and authority in his voice or the fact there were only a few layers of clothes separating his dick from my ass. Either way, I was in love.

Sean turned us around and allowed Mark through the gate first. When I turned to close the gate behind me, John was still standing there glaring at me. He said in a voice barely above a whisper, so I was the only one who could hear, "Watch your back, fucker. Sean will come back to me."

I laughed. "Keep dreaming psycho-stalker."

I closed the gate and headed to the back door. Once I was inside, I saw it was about 12:40. I walked into the living room just behind Mark and Sean. Everyone looked at us oddly. Before anyone could say anything, I said, "Alright, it's time for everyone to head out. Curfew is in twenty minutes. Stacey, your douchebag cousin is waiting by your car. I love you to death girl, but don't bring him around here again if you can avoid it." She started to apologize, so I cut her off. "It's not your fault your cousin is a psycho-stalker-cock-whore, so don't apologize for anything. Does everyone have a ride?"

Mark spoke up then. "TJ, Sean, do you mind if I stick around and talk to y'all before I leave?"

Sean looked at me and raised one eyebrow. I nodded. "Yeah, that's fine."

He looked at Patrick and asked, "Do you think you can get a ride from one of them?" Patrick nodded, and Mark continued. "Good, thanks. Tell Cuz I'll see him tomorrow."

Once everyone was gone, Patrick rode away with Amber and Mike, I turned to Mark. "Curfew's in like ten minutes, I don't want you to get busted."

"It's okay, I'm eighteen. But I'll head out if you want me too."

"No, you're fine. I can tell something's on your mind. Do you want to talk about it or just hang out for a bit?"

He looked at the four of us and sighed. "If you don't mind, I'd like to hang for a bit." He then turned to Sean and asked, "What were you and your dad talking about?"

Sean told them what he knew. Kevin stood up and gave him a big bear hug, patting him on his back with slaps I was sure were going to leave bruises. He released Sean, sat down next to Josh, pulled him onto his lap, and smirked. "Does that mean we're staying here till your dad gets back?"

Josh was beaming when he looked over at Sean and me. "Really?"

From what Sean told me outside, I knew he was worried but not upset about what happened, so I couldn't pass up this opportunity to make those two feel bad; so, I spoke up. "Damn you two. His grandfather just had a stroke, is in the hospital, and could possibly be fighting for his very life and y'all are over there smiling and shit because y'all get to spend the night together? That's fucking cold."

I intentionally overdramatized a bit. Sean was the only one who noticed though. Before the two lovebirds could start groveling, Sean called me on my bullshit. "Stop being a dick Teej. I'm just as happy as they look because this means I get to spend more time with you."

I stuck my lower lip out in a pout and muttered, "I thought you liked dicks."

That made Mark snort out a laugh, which reminded me he wanted to talk. "So, what's on your mind Mark?"

He took in a deep breath, looked towards the ceiling, and sighed. He glanced at Kevin and Josh and said, "Sean and TJ just caught me getting head outside from that guy John."

Kevin looked confused for a second. "I thought you were straight."

Josh blurted out, "Damn, is the whole team gay?"

Mark chuckled and said, "No, I think just those two and Patrick. There might be a couple of closeted bi guys, but I'm not one of them. Well, I didn't think I was. I don't fucking know. I'm sorry. He just dropped to his knees and next thing I knew, he was pulling my dick out. Even though I knew what he wanted to do when we went outside, I didn't stop him. So what, I'm bi now? God this shit's so fucked up."

He was freaking out a little and Sean noticed this; so, he said, "Hey, Mark, it's okay. You don't need to explain yourself to us. But if you want to talk this out, we'll listen. Just don't freak out."

"You're right. Part of me is freaking out right now wondering what it means that I got hard and got off without trying to stop him. I mean, I've always found some guys attractive, but I'm also attracted to girls. Does that make me bi all of a sudden?

"The other part of me, the more rational side, knows I'm an eighteen-year-old guy who gets hard-ons when the wind changes directions. There aren't many teenage guys out there who wouldn't get hard when someone plays with their cock, right? Just because I got off and didn't tell him to stop, doesn't make me gay. But I did enjoy it and I knew what he wanted to do when we went outside. I guess I just wanted to have fun with someone I was attracted to. What does that mean?"

From what I heard, I thought I might have an idea, but I needed a little bit more information first. "Why did you decide to follow him outside? Was it because you wanted to get off, or because you were curious about being with a guy, or were you attracted to him?"

He looked at me for a moment. "Actually, all three I guess. While we were in here talking earlier, he started flirting with me. I told him I was flattered, but straight. I didn't know what else to say. That didn't stop me from flirting back. I've flirted with guys before. Mainly, it was while I was joking around with Patrick and Ethan."

"So, you knew about them before tonight?"

Mark chuckled. "Ethan's mom and my mom are cousins. Growing up, they were more like sisters. I've known Ethan his whole life. When he moved in next door to Patrick, I was helping them move and knew Patrick from football, so I introduced them to each other. The sparks were instant. Poor Ethan was so scared and nervous it took at least thirty seconds for him to say hello. I was waiting for Patrick to say something or make fun of Ethan. All he did was smile and asked if we wanted to go swimming once we were finished moving. The rest is their story to tell. Now, focus and get back to helping me figure my shit out."

"Oh yeah. Okay, where were we? Attraction. Alright. What are you sexually attracted to in girls?"

"I don't have a type at all."

"Alright Mark, answer me honestly, you can trust us."

He nodded and agreed. "I'll be honest. I know I don't have to worry about y'all spreading shit around."

"Thank you. Do you think you could be in a relationship with a guy? Both physical and emotional?"

Again, he took his time before he answered. "I honestly don't know. Maybe. If I stop and think about it, I could see myself being with a guy if we clicked."

"Okay, do you have a type of guy you're attracted to?"

"Not really. I can say all four of y'all are attractive guys. I guess I was attracted to the John I first met in here last night. The John at the end of the night from outside wasn't the same person. I could never be attracted to someone so vapid."

I smiled. "Could you have sex with a girl if you found out she had a penis?"

"You mean a transsexual?"

I nodded. "Yeah. You meet a gorgeous girl at a party. She's exactly your type physically when you look at her while she's clothed. When she goes down on you, she's still fully dressed, and you receive the best blowjob of your life. Are you okay with everything that happened?"

Mark chuckled. "Yeah. I am."

"Okay, y'all start dating and things progress. Y'all are making out one night and you're feeling her up. It's obvious she's had breast implants, but I'm sure that doesn't bother you." He nodded, so I continued, "She blows you again and you love it. When you try to reciprocate, she says she's fine. This happens a few more times, then when you try to finger her, she asks you to play with her breast instead. Finally, after a few more dates, she asks you to have sex with her. However, she'll only do it in the dark, no lights at all, she has to be on top, and she wants reversed cowboy position. You can play with her breast or run your hands along her sides and back. You've really started liking, close to loving her and want more. Do you agree to it?"

"If I liked her that much, then yeah, if that will make her happy."

"So, you're saying you'll do it that way every time because it will make her happy and it's about her pleasure or are you agreeing to get laid."

Mark thought for a second before he answered, "Both. I'd like to say I'm selfless and it's all about her pleasure, but hell, I'm a guy and I want to get laid."

That brought out my smile. "Good answer. This goes on for a bit, but let's be honest, only one position every time in the dark would get boring, right?"

"Yeah. I guess I'd probably want to change things up eventually."

"Okay, two weeks later, you try to initiate sex missionary style. She tells you no; since you're not a rapist, you stop. You ask her what's wrong and she starts crying. You've fallen in love with her by now. What do you do?"

"I pull her in my arms and ask her to talk to me and tell me what's wrong."

Before I could continue, Sean's phone started ringing. When he checked caller id, I noticed it was Robert (his contact name read Mr. Kennedy). I told him to go ahead and answer, I was going to keep talking to Mark.

"She says you'll hate her and never want to see her again."

"I tell her that's not possible because I love her and don't want to lose her."

"She begs you to promise her that's true. She says she'll tell you if you promise not to kick her out of your life. Once she tells you what she has to say, she'll give you space by going into the other room or allowing you to leave, but since y'all are at your place, she's not leaving till after you've thought about it. Then, if you want her to leave, she will and never talk to you again."

"I guess I would be hesitant, but I would agree."

"She takes off her clothes with her back to you and after she's naked and turns around, you see the woman you love. You know her breasts well, since you've felt them up so many times. You see her tight stomach that you love running your hands over while you're making love. Then you look down and see no pubic hair but there is a penis. It's not huge, but it's not a micro-penis either. She tells you she's transgender and hasn't had bottom surgery yet. What would you do?"

He took his time to consider his answer. "If I really was in love with her, I would continue to love her. I can understand why she wouldn't have told me about herself before. Love is love."

"What if she told you she never planned on having surgery? She wanted to keep things exactly the way they were, would you stay with her and still be sexually attracted to her and able to have sex with her?"

"I would like to say yes. I think I could handle that."

Sean walked back into the room and sat next to me. He looked at Kevin and Josh and said, "Mr. Kennedy spoke with my dad, we're going to stay here till he gets back. He told me my dad will call me tomorrow to let me know how long we'll be here." He turned to me and asked with a wink, "So, have you figured out Mark yet?"

"I think so." I turned to Mark and smiled. "Congratulations, I think you might be pansexual. You might want to read up on it before you give yourself that label. Remember, you decide your sexuality. You choose your label."

"What does pansexual mean? Can't make up your fucking mind because you're interested in everything?"

"The second part about interested in everything, yes. The first part about making up your mind, not so much."

Josh spoke up next. "That sounds like bisexual. Is it the same?"

"Not really. Identifying as pansexual tells others you can be attracted to a man or a woman, as well as someone who is transsexual, intersexual, or whatever."

Mark's smile was so big, I thought it was going to reach his ears. "Wow, that sounds right. I never acted on my attraction to a guy because I've always known I wasn't gay. I thought I had to be straight if I wasn't gay. How did you know to ask all these questions?"

It was my turn to chuckle. "I took an online quiz. 'Are you pansexual?' The answer for me was no, I'm not. I'm gay. But if what you're saying is true, I think you might be. You know we're starting a GSA at the school. Even though it's called a gay-straight alliance, everyone is welcome to join regardless of how they identify. You're welcome to join us."

"Sounds good, I'll definitely check it out and let Ethan know about it too. Patrick and I will probably have to drag him into the meeting, but we'll get him there."

Kevin spoke up. "We're going to meet him tomorrow. Patrick invited us, Teej, and Sean over to go swimming. He said you were probably going to be there too."

Mark looked at the floor before saying, "I don't know if I'll be there. I don't want to...never mind. I'll think about it."

I didn't like his answer at all. "You don't what?"

He looked a little confused, then realization dawned. "It's nothing. Don't worry about it." His voice sounded a little sad. I wasn't going to accept nothing as an answer.

"Wrong! Try again. I can tell it's something, so talk to us. Please."

He kept looking at the floor until he finally mumbled, "I just don't want to feel like a third wheel I guess."

"You don't have to worry about that." He looked at me with surprise before I continued, "Wouldn't it be more like a seventh wheel? And honestly, who's ever heard of an eight-wheeler?"

Josh, who was sitting on Kevin's lap still, shifted till he was sitting next him instead. He looked at Mark and said, "If you start feeling uncomfortable or left out or anything else, grab one of us and let us know. We'll take that as a signal we're getting too into ourselves; which, honestly, we tend to do a lot. You'll have to remind us more than once. I can tell you don't have a problem letting people know what you're feeling. Otherwise you wouldn't have opened up to all of us like you did. You're our friend now, and you're stuck with us. I'm going to apologize now for my brother."

"Fuck you very much baby bro. I'd watch my mouth if I were you before I tell Kevin to stuff it with his dick."

Of course, Kevin turned an adorable shade of red. There's just something so cute about making a guy who's so tall and well-built blush at a moment's notice.

While we were talking, I guess we didn't hear Robert's car pull in, or when he came in through the garage door. So, I might have jumped a little when he suddenly slapped me on the back of my head and said, "Don't talk to your brother like that. And Kevin, I'm not even going there. We'll just pretend I didn't hear anything."

Okay, yeah I did jump and yelled, "Dammit Robert, what the hell. I told you to stop hitting me on the head, you're going to end up giving me a concussion."

I noticed Sean tense up when I said that. I recalled the last time I said those same words in front of him and he had the same response. I tried to remember to remind myself to ask him about it.

Robert looked at Mark and said, "Mark, what are you doing here? Everything alright? Great game tonight you three, by the way."

Mark smiled. "Thank you, sir. Everything's fine. I just needed some help thinking, and they were all helping me out. I was just about to leave."

Robert returned Mark's smile. "Are you eighteen now?" After Mark nodded, Robert continued. "Alright. You're welcome over here anytime. Sean, are you okay son?"

Son? What? Son! Oh, hell no, not allowed. "Please don't call Sean son, Robert. I don't want to sleep with my brother."

Robert and Josh said, "Thank God!" in unison.

I looked at Mark, and I could see the questions he was about to start asking, so I spoke up first. "Okay, Josh is my biological brother. I call Robert, Robert, because for the first seventeen years of my life, he was my much older, almost ancient, brother." Which earned me another, lighter slap to the back of my head. "After our parents died," I had to take a breath and pause for a second before I continued, "I found out he is my father and I moved in and took over."

Once I said all of that, I realized it was the first time Robert heard me talk about our family dynamics to anyone. I wasn't sure how he was going to take it. He surprised me when he laughed. "That's the Cliff's Notes version of the story, I guess. But, basically, yeah. Teej, can I talk to you for a second?"

Mark stood up when I did and said, "I'm going to head out, I'll see y'all later."

I stopped him and said, "You mean tomorrow at Patrick's, right?"

He took a deep breath and sighed. "You don't give up do you?"

I shook my head. "Nope, I'm like a god with a bone."

He looked confused when he asked, "Don't you mean dog with a bone?"

I shook my head again and chuckled. "Nope. I said it right. I'm like a god with a bone. Well, at least Sean's bone, ask him."

That earned me a collective groan from everyone in the room as well as a slap to the back of my head from Robert. Again.

After Robert and I told Mark goodbye and headed into the kitchen, I could hear the other three apologizing to him about me. Assholes. Once in the kitchen, Robert asked, "Was the humor in the story about us real or just bravado? And I want an honest answer, please."

I sighed. "A little of both, I think. I want to tell you I'm okay with everything now, but you said you wanted honesty. I'm not totally there yet, but I'm working on it."

He crossed over to me and wrapped me in his arms. "That's all I can hope and ask for. If you need anything, I'm here."

It was then I noticed how much his hug felt like our dad's hugs. I pulled back a little and looked at him. "Wow, I keep forgetting something."

"What's that?"

"How much you remind me of Dad. Both in looks and how you treat me and Josh."

His eyes filled with tears and he gave me a huge smile. "Thanks. You know, you look a lot like I did in high school. Guess you're going to look like him too."