Tough Lesson Learned

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Daniel tries to fight his attraction to his student.
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Tsania
Tsania
68 Followers

There is a curious balance between watched and watching. Between prey and predator. He sees the whole class, he watches her. She sees him; she watches her back and knows because of this she is being watched. But by whom she doesn't fully know.

It's a teacher, she knows. She feels the disapproving eyes on her as she moves from group to group, but they don't see all, they don't know. Or, if they do, there's nothing they can do. She never brings anything contraband to college, she never sells in this district. Oh, sure she's got some customers from this area, she's even sold to one or two teachers before. Those were awkward times, when she'd got a call from another part of the city, only to turn up to find the person behind the door was a teacher. Was her teacher. Those were the classes she got the best grades in now. She thought of it as lubricating her future. There was no way she was going to be stuck in this dump with these losers for the rest of her life. She was going to make a name for herself. Everyone would know Elsa.

Well, everyone already did. Everyone knew Elsa sold the best weed. Yes, you had to pay a little bit more for it, but it was clean and not cut with anything else to carry the weight. Elsa was someone you could trust. But still, there was this feeling she had, on the back of her neck. Someone knew, someone wasn't happy.

Daniel Jennings stood at the widow of his chemistry lab on the third floor. It gave him a perfect bird's-eye view of the events in the school ground below. It was here that he first noticed Elsa's bizarre behaviour. Though she was one of the stoners; the crowd who didn't do so well in class, but never made too much of a fuss so teachers just let them coast on the lower grades; she rarely spent a lot of her time with them. As Daniel stood there sorting through the latest mock-exam papers for the upcoming STUDIES exams, he watched as Elsa flitted from group to group in the grounds below. In his hand he clutched her paper; he'd marked it as a low 'B' grade. But she was a stoner. It was her hand-writing. Even without comparing it to her class work, he knew it was her handwriting because of the distinctive way she wrote the word 'oxygen'. The 'xyg' looped into each other in such a way that it made Daniel think of those adverts for hydrating drinks.

He was still convinced she'd cheated somehow.

True, her grades had been high all year. Also true that she'd shown real interest in class. But still, she was a stoner. They coasted. They didn't get top-ten grades in class. Something was amiss, he was sure of it. His eyes drifted over her again. Perhaps she was paying one of the science nerds in weed to do her homework for her, to feed her the answers. Perhaps she was cheating.

Daniel rolled the word around his head slowly. It wasn't often he thought this. He wanted to think the best of his pupils. But there was something up with her. He couldn't place it, but he knew it was something he didn't like. He was young for a teacher, not quite fresh out of University, but this was his second placement. The first, he'd lost that doe-eyed certainty that he was making a difference in the world in less than a term. Now he was just getting through each day. He was glad that he taught Chemistry. The ability to simply blow something up on a bad day and call it 'science' was very satisfying. His first school had been an inner-city one. The kids were rougher than this lot. A day where for one lesson he could be heard over the din of chaos was a good day. They didn't happen often.

This school was in the suburbs, true, but it wasn't the wealthy part of the city. It was the area bordering the slum part of the city, where prostitutes and drug dealers alike were selling their wares openly in daylight. Here, the prostitutes stayed home, the men came to them; the dealers went to your door instead of standing on the corner. It wasn't much better, but it was more discreet. No student of this college would achieve a glowing future; on the other hand, at least they weren't as doomed as those in the next district over.

Daniel sighed as he put the paper back in the pile. Far below, Elsa moved again from one group to the next, conversing with everyone, making sure she was on good terms with all.

------

For once Elsa did the normal teenaged thing of hanging around on a street corner, looking like she was up to no good. She'd run out of produce a while back, and had just enough time to get to the bank before it shut to deposit most of the cash into an account for her future. However, her curfew wasn't until nine, and in the summer it was warm and light outside at that time. At home all she had waiting for her was her drug-addled parents and cold, bad food. Her friends had gone home for their tea a long time ago, and she didn't want to go to the cinema alone, especially not this late. It was a school-night besides.

Elsa had already done her homework, she'd only had the time between when she got back from college and when her dad got back from 'work' around 5 or 6 to do anything by herself. He would either want her to smoke with him, or he would be in a foul mood and demand to know how much she'd made for him. He wasn't her real dad, but he'd taken care of her since she was very little and her mum was constantly in a stupor. Keith had started out as her mother's dealer. Then he began to spend more and more time around. He often said as a joke that Elsa was so quiet, he'd lived with them for two months before he realised his new girlfriend had a daughter at all. Elsa remembered that time with a little haze. The guy her mum had kept around before Keith had been very touchy-feely with her, and she didn't like him. When Keith kicked him out one night for beating Elsa's already-unconscious mother half to death, Elsa was still frightened this new one would be like the last one.

Keith, however, was very different. He'd been kind and made sure she always had something to eat in the evenings. He even drove her to school when she missed the bus. He was like a real dad to her, except when he was in a rage. Keith worked the streets for the harder drugs. He had a weed plantation somewhere out in the sticks which kept him supplied, and he also peddled pills and rocks for the bigger drug dealers. But if his supply got cut due to a raid, or if a client died or went into rehab, he wasn't happy, and when he wasn't happy Elsa was the first to know. He never beat her, or touched her in anyway. He was just bitter and cruel to her. She was an easy target, she knew. So instead she became an absent target. She came home long after he'd smoked himself into a blissful state, and went straight to her room.

When she was thirteen he'd approached her one morning and asked her if she wanted to make some pocket money. He'd slipped twelve plastic bags of some green across the breakfast table, telling her each was worth £10. "Enough for your little friends to get a little happy." She'd refused to sell them at college, but she said she'd ask around for afterwards. That's how she began. She'd go round each clique, they all knew who she was now. She kept up on the gossip, and got people's phone numbers and addresses to go drop the stuff off later. It was tough work without a car, some people lived out in the middle of nowhere, but it gave her enough to get by and never ask Keith or her mum for money. Keith, of course, expected a little kickback for the green he provided, but he was reasonable. He knew she was saving to get out of there, and he approved whole-heartedly.

So now Elsa was about half an hour's walk from her house. Her friends had abandoned her, the streets were getting darker and she scuffed her shoes along the outside of the curb, hands in her hoodie pockets and staring at the dimming sky. A couple cars had slowed to a crawl on the off chance she was stood there to sell something, but when she didn't approach the windows, they quickly pulled away.

She was startled to feel a hand yank her arm backward out of her pocket. Ready to fight or flee, she turned.

"Mr Jennings?" Her surprise made her forget her stance, one fist raised behind her head. His eyes flicked angrily from her fist back to her face. She lowered her arm. "You surprised me."

"What the hell do you think you're doing out here?" He was furious. He'd been watching her from his kitchen window as she stood on the corner. He didn't know whether he was more angry that she was in his neighbourhood, likely selling drugs or herself, or that he'd caught himself admiring her body.

"Sorry, Mr Jennings. I'm just killing time before curfew." She had the decency to lower her head and scuff her shoes again. His brow drew together. Doing this, she looked her age. Finally.

"Don't you know how dangerous it is for a girl your age to stand around? Come on, you can kill time inside my place and then I'll drive you home. When is your curfew?" He spun around and walked away, listening for her footsteps to begin tripping after him.

"It's 9pm, sir. I know it's dangerous, but I have nothing else to do."

"Didn't it occur to you to go home early?" As they walked into his house, he shut the door behind them, throwing the bolt across, making sure she saw him do it so she didn't think he was trapping her.

"My parents..." She trailed off. His face softened mildly.

"Ah yes, the eternal battle that is teenagers and their parents. I'd forgotten. Well, no harm done, now. Would you like a drink or anything?" He turned away from her again, going into the kitchen. She followed and stood awkwardly at the door. "Take a seat, what do you like? I was thinking of having some hot cocoa and marshmallows before bed. What do you think?"

Her eyes lit up quietly. He could see she was polite, not too forceful, but she did like the idea of cocoa. Daniel wondered when the last time she had been treated to such things was. She slipped on to one of the rickety chairs at the table and drew off her jumper. As it tugged off her form, Daniel suddenly couldn't look away. She was a plump girl, still got the puppy fat. She usually dressed in baggy clothes as she was larger than her svelte friends. But tonight, under the baggy hoodie, she wore a tight-fitting strappy top which displayed her sizable breasts, and a short flowered skirt over coloured leggings and sneakers. Her hair tumbled out of the jumper and she quickly adjusted herself so she felt decent. Daniel swallowed and concentrated on pouring the milk into a saucepan. His mind was skipping all over the place. He'd never felt attracted to one of his students before.

"Thanks, Mr Jennings. But, can I ask you a question?" She looked at him squarely, obviously not recognising his silent internal struggle. He nodded, not trusting his voice. "That exam was quite difficult, and I didn't understand some stuff in the second section." Daniel smiled.

"Which parts exactly?"

"The stuff about atomic structure. I get that the electrons and protons are equal in number, and that dictates where they are in the periodic table, but I don't get why there's a massive gap in the middle." Daniel turned to glance at her. Her hair tumbled down over one shoulder as she traced a pattern with her finger tip on the table top. Her breasts were propped on her arm, pushing them up and deepening her cleavage. Daniel turned back quickly, feeling his blood rise.

"Erm well," he licked his lips, "That's because of the electron shells, how the electrons are arranged around the nucleus. In the first shell there only can be two electrons, the second can hold eight and so on. Hold on, I'll show you." Daniel sprinkled some cinnamon into the cocoa as it began to boil. He poured the liquid into two mugs and dropped some marshmallows into the top and carried them across to the table. "Those are hot, don't touch them for a bit. Let the mallows melt first." He rushed to the next room to grab some paper and a pen and returned, grabbing the mallow packet before sitting in the chair next to her. "Look, this is how it works."

For the next ten minutes he explained how the number of electron shells dictated which row the element was on the table, and how full the outer shell was dictated which column it was in. When she understood, he sat back, pleased at her realisation. She began drawing electron shells herself, checking which element she'd drawn on his periodic table. He took a mallow from the packet and popped it in his mouth. She watched him closely, so he held out one for her. To both their surprise, her mouth opened with an audible soft, wet 'pop'. Without thinking, Daniel placed the soft pink sweet on her waiting tongue.

They both held their breath as she closed her mouth again, her eyes wide, fixated on his. Her drawings were forgotten in front of her, pen abandoned. The sugary taste exploded in her mouth as her eyes were opened to him. He broke the stare, reaching for his mug. He cleared his throat before he took a sip.

"It's cool enough now to drink." She studied him. He wasn't that bad looking. His dark hair was scruffy, he wore glasses which were perpetually slipping down his nose. He took care of himself. Right now he wore an old t-shirt and jeans with paint and grease on them, but the t-shirt was taught across the muscles of his shoulders and chest, the jeans displayed his nice rounded ass. He couldn't be older than twenty-five. She also sensed something broken in him, something that couldn't be fixed. She took a sip of her drink.

He mentally berated himself for what he'd done. One part of him said it was only a marshmallow, another screamed at him for being so stupid. She might be young, but she was female and therefore capable of any sort of manipulation. The image of his lingering fingers on the pink mallow, the soft rust of her breath over his hand, even now he could feel the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. He forced his mind to think of other things. He still had to drive her home.

"Oh wow, Mr Jennings. This is the best cocoa I've ever had!" She took another long drink, and suddenly she was a child again. When she pulled the mug away from her mouth she had a milky film on her upper lip. She licked it clean, smacking her lips and looking around the place. Daniel saw it through her eyes. He'd only unpacked his last box a month ago, so he hadn't even thought of redecorating yet. The kitchen had once been white or cream, but now the walls were stained with the tobacco smoke of the previous tenant. Through the archway she could see the magazines and books and unmarked homework of his classes covering every conceivable surface in the sitting room. "You live alone here?" Hey wide eyes turned back to him.

"Yep I do. Drink up, Elsa. We'd better get you home before you're late." She glanced at the clock and rushed the last mouthfuls of the drink. They made the journey back to hers with about five minutes to spare of her curfew. She ducked her head down once she'd left the car.

"Thanks for everything, Mr Jennings. It was really nice of you." She turned and skipped up the pathway, opening her front door quietly and turning no lights on inside. Daniel waited until she was safely inside and he'd heard the front door click locked before pulling away. Back inside his house he stared at the two dirty mugs, nestled together on the table. Then he noticed she'd left her hoodie on one of the chairs. He felt himself frown. It was going to be tough to return that to her without it seeming suspicious.

------

Elsa had chemistry on Tuesdays and Fridays with Mr Jennings. Today was Friday and she could feel that she was excited for the first time to be going to a lesson. She practically skipped into the classroom. He looked as surly and disinterested as ever. Sometimes he could be fun, letting them make stuff explode. That seemed to release some tension in him. But on days like today, she knew it'd be book work and copying from the board. At the end of the lesson she felt her spirit rise as she called her name.

"I'd like a word with you, please Elsa." She motioned for her friends to carry on, they were eager to get in line for lunch. "Here, you left this at mine Wednesday night." He handed her the hoodie.

"Oh, of course. Sorry sir I'd forgotten." He turned away as she lingered, biting her lip. "Sir? Do you think you could tutor me?" He paused, and she saw the tension in his back increase and then forcefully decrease before he turned.

"I have to ask you something, Elsa." He turned to her, but didn't look at her. She tilted her head in question. "Have you been cheating?" She took a step back.

"No, sir. All the work I do is my own. What makes you think I was cheating?" She lowered her head, as if she was disappointed in his question.

"The people you hang around with, they don't do so well. Your grades are high, but you don't seem to pay so much attention in class." A frown passed across her face, but it cleared.

"You think because my friends are stoners and happy to do the minimum I should do too?" Her voice was quiet, humble. Her head snapped up, and he could see it was twisted with anger. "I didn't choose my family, sir. I didn't choose to have a drug dealer for a step-dad. I'd love to be a nerd, sir, but as it is I'm saving up for my future. Every piece of work I do is my own, because I don't want to be stuck here. I don't want to have the choice everyone else does. I don't want to be my mother." She gasped as if she'd said too much. She covered her mouth and stifled the sob which came too loud for the empty room.

For a moment the noise from outside overwhelmed them both. Students yelled and screamed in the corridor as they made their way to the playground or the cafeteria. Elsa's shoulders slowly stopped shaking. Daniel dearly wanted to move around the desk and hold her, comfort her, allow her to cry and tell her she was safe, but he knew that wasn't permitted. Just as she knew. Finally she got it under control. She sniffed and lifted her face to him. Her cheeks were pink with suppressed emotion.

"Please, sir. It's not often I find someone who actually cares. Will you tutor me?"

"We can't at my house, but it's a possibility that I could run an after-hours thing here for you and some others who also want a bit extra help. I'll ask the head." She smiled sweetly, then nodded, using the reclaimed hoodie to wipe tears from her face.

"Do I look okay?" He nodded and she left quietly.

"You look wonderful." He said under his breath. He thought she heard when she turned slightly, but then she was swallowed by the crowd of students and gone from his sight.

------

The exams went too quickly. The head agreed for Daniel to set up a weekly after-hours class for about five to ten students who wanted that little extra help to pass or excel. He worked hard to teach them everything they needed and wanted to know, and too soon the exam was there and then gone. His little extra time with Elsa, watching her up close, understanding her mind and her dreams was over. He felt as if it was a time that passed too quickly for him. She was applying to a university in the city in the autumn term, one that specialized in sciences. His heart had swelled with pride when she told him that. Daniel would never see his Elsa again.

The weeks ticked over slowly. The teachers had their end-of-year do before the term broke up. The school was silent when Daniel went to pick up the last of his stuff from the labs. He glanced out the now-familiar windows over the empty school grounds as he packed up his box. Nearly empty. He glanced back. In the yard, three lonely figures stood, they were talking and joking, he could see them laugh but not hear at what. One of them was Elsa. He watched as the other two handed something to her. She held it up to the light, and then brought it to her face. He knew by the way she was acting that it was a drug deal he was seeing.

Tsania
Tsania
68 Followers