Train of Thought Ch. 02

Author's note:

Thank you so much to the many readers with their kind words. I hope you enjoy this installment. I actually try to incorporate some of your ideas, so I certainly appreciate your suggestions! If you have not read Chapter 1, please do so. Hope you all enjoy it and let me know what you think!

PLEASE NOTE: This is a re-post, so if you have read this series before and did not like it, you are forewarned to move on. New readers are more than welcome!

*****

As I poured coffee for myself, perhaps my fourth cup of the day, my hands shook. Over and over again, the words from her text ran through my head, shooting illicit thoughts to my groin, and back up to fantasy land. Erin, my 19 year old daughter, had just texted:

"Maybe I can meet you at Grand Central tonight and we can ride the train together..."

We had been riding the train together all week and, what started as innocent bumping on a crowded rail car, became full out masturbation from her small yet expert hand. I had wickedly asked her when I could return the favor and she suggested we ride home together tonight. So what is a father supposed to do?

"Hello? I've been talking to you, dude. Jeez, where's your head at?" Williams shook his head and walked past me in the kitchenette near my desk. He grabbed his own cup and poured ice and water. He took a sip and looked at me. "You're looking a bit nervous. Anything we should know about?"

"No. No, it's cool. Just have a couple of deals in my head. Don't worry about it." I turned and left Williams frowning and shaking his head.

I was a bit nervous, I admitted. Maybe more than a bit. Butterflies were fluttering in my stomach, threatening to help me lose my lunch in the men's room. I was a nervous wreck, to say the least. I could not concentrate on work; how could I? My own flesh and blood was agreeing to continue what we had started and I was starting to lose my nerve.

I thought of Janet, sweet and innocent, alone at home, waiting on the two of us with dinner ready. I was an asshole. I was a major league jerk! I was cheating on my wife and with our very own daughter! Adultery and incest? Did they make special jails for us? Who rapes a rapist? Who rapes an adulterer? And who abuses an abuser? Prisons, I assumed, were full of sinners such as I. Janet and I had a great marriage, happy on all accounts. No troubles, no major issues. So why the fuck would I risk it all on this affair? Why would I risk embarrassment, humiliation, possible jail time, all to satisfy my forbidden lust for Erin?

There was no explanation. There was no rhyme or reason. Reason went out the door a long time ago, about the time Erin had unzipped my pants and felt my vein-pulsing cock, skin to skin, her soft hand sliding up and down my hardened shaft. It was bliss and glorious heaven. And it fueled greater desire on my part. I had to have her. I had to have more.

At 4:30PM, having stared at my computer screen for the past two hours, reading nothing, pretending to read, pretending to work, pretending to care, I frantically began to get my computer bag packed. Someone had stuck his head in to ask me a question, but please don't ask me what the question was. I couldn't recite it if I was testifying in a court of law. No fucking way. I had but one thing on my mind and it had to do with sweet young pussy! I was a sick, fucking bastard.

By 4:47PM I was walking into Grand Central and strolling as casually as I could to our usual spot where we said goodbye for the day. I glanced about, certain that everyone was looking at me, knowing in my heart that every passerby could see into my heart, into my eyes, the crimes I was about to commit. I could tell they knew of my guilt. I could sense their holier-than-thou disapproval. I couldn't even blame them. But I no longer listened to the critics. I had my purpose in life, my mission, my reason for living.

And there she was, tall, proud, smiling, a wonder in her flower print dress, the soft cotton blend hugging her dancer's body so seductively, perfection in human form. I smiled back, nervously, tentatively. We met and hugged lightly, quickly, as if she too were aware of everyone staring at us. We had guilt and shame enveloping us and we seemed frozen to the spot, looking at each other like two children who had just met in the sandbox. Expectant, yet neither saying a word nor making a move.

"How...how was your day, hon?" I said, hearing my voice crack.

She shrugged. "It was okay. Busy. And yours?"

I nodded. "Yeah, mine was busy too."

"Hard to think of much of anything today," she said softly.

"Yeah. Me too." I took in a deep breath and let it out, feeling the uneven flow as I exhaled. Maybe I would pass out before we did anything. That would at least save us from committing this act. I glanced around and really looked this time, looked at the faces of New Yorkers in their rush and bustle. To my delight, no one was looking at us. No one seemed to care or know we existed. I smiled and looked back at Erin.

"Dad..." she said quietly.

I took her hand and led her to the commuter rails. "Come on, hon. Let's go home."

We climbed onto the fifth car down the tracks and stood near the doorway. The walls were all taken, so the middle of the car was the only place to jockey for position. We settled into our own space, she facing me, and my arms instinctively wrapped around her back. As the train began to move, we seemed to stand still, pressing our bodies closely, but only moving with the light vibrations of the car moving. It was an intimate dance, yet neither of us took it further. I pressed my growing hardness into her and Erin neither backed away, nor pressed tighter into me. It just seemed natural, yet tentative. I looked down at her and we stared into each other's eyes. I could see her swallow once and smile at me sadly, as if she had made a decision I didn't like. My heart was beating and sinking all at once. Was the spell broken? Had she come to her senses and realized that we had gone too far?

On the first stop outside the city, a few passengers got off and we were able to separate somewhat, having been offered more room to stand. Erin stepped back a bit, yet the jostling car still kept her in close enough proximity to bump me from time to time. I was heart-broken. Our dance had ended and she was now putting us back to where we came from, separate, close, but not touching deliberately.

I looked down and realized my cock was deflating, feeling rejected, feeling lost. She had been so close. Her text offered such promise. Or maybe I had hoped and fantasized about greater things. I sighed inwardly and smiled back at her with the same sad eyes.

At the next stop, more people got off the train and a bench had opened up. We both glanced at it and decided to take the seat. Now we truly were apart, each in our own seat. She sat by the window and glanced outside. A soft rain had begun to blot out the view and the world was plunged into darkness and dreariness.

I turned to her and she looked at me. We said nothing, just looked into each other's eyes. We could tell; we could see. It had been a wonderful fantasy and we had flirted with a bonfire. Yet now it was time to come home. Now it was time to end this charade. Erin's big brown eyes were watery and I lifted a finger to wipe the tear that spilled over. She shrugged once and looked down at her hands on her lap.

I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. I looked down at her soft, delicate hands and took one in my hands, squeezing gently. She smiled at me, then looked away, glanced at the older couple on the bench across the aisle from us. The rail car was now less than half full. Her eyes met mine again.

Outside, the sign post read "Riverside". Two more stops until we reached Stamford. My heart began to beat faster. Two stops. It would all be over in two stops. It was as if I were breaking up with a girlfriend—or getting dumped by someone I had been in love with, obsessed about, for years, yet in actuality, had only been days since Erin and I had started this madness. And now it was over. My heart raced and I felt as if I were going to die.

I licked my lips and lifted her chin. Staring deeply into her eyes, I could see the hurt and pain mirrored mine. I swallowed once.

"Dad..." she whispered.

Then, I leaned forward slowly, as if time slowed and I was moving through plasma. Tentatively, softly, our lips met in a tender kiss. We lingered there for a long moment, pressing only slightly, almost chastely. It was magical. Electric. Just like the very first kiss between a boy and a girl. My hand came up and softly caressed her cheek. And still our kiss continued.

Erin opened her mouth a little and my heart began to soar as I felt it as minor invitation. My tongue slithered forward and touched her lips and, moments later, her tongue touched the tip of mine. It was so romantic and loving and it turned me on beyond all reason. Our kiss grew as she seemed to turn towards me more along the bench. My left arm snaked around her shoulders and I pulled her to me, while my other hand continued to stroke her face as our mouths joined in the most intimate kiss I ever experienced. My cock throbbed with yearning and need.

Reluctantly leaving her face, my hand drifted down to her soft, young breast, covered by her thin sun dress. I tweaked her nipple and was delighted to feel its hard nub beneath my fingers. She was aroused. Her hands tentatively reached out now and held me at the waist and eventually, I could feel one of her hands at my crotch. Good God. My heart pounded in my ears and I lost sight and sound of where we were and who was around us.

We were feeling each other through our clothes and refused to end our intimate kissing. If other passengers were watching, they would have seen two frantic lovers in love and sharing a long and passionate kiss. Nothing more. Nothing less. I needed to feel more of her.

I broke our kiss and looked into her glazed eyes. I scooted towards her and she instinctively stood up, then sat back down on my lap. Now I was close enough to worm my hand up her skirt and feel the silkiness of her bare legs. Her thighs separated slightly, offering me better access, and I made slow, circular motions on the inside of her legs. She leaned into me again and we continued our torrid kiss. Her arms were around my neck and we enjoyed each other's mouths and tongues. Her soft breath came out in short pants as my fingers began to stroke her panty-covered pussy. I couldn't feel any hair down there and my cock twitched at imagining her tight, young pussy being all shaved smoothly, cleanly, hot, wet, ready.

I wanted to return the favor she had given me these past few days and so, glancing around and seeing no one noticing us, pushed her cotton panties aside and began to rub lightly, in circular motions again, my fingers seeking her clit. When I heard Erin's soft moan into my mouth, I knew I had found the prize. Slowly, my thumb pleasured her erogenous zone and I began to slip one finger into her moist pussy. It was indescribable. My words will fail to paint an exact picture of what she felt like. So soft, lightly moistened lips and flesh. Her tunnel gripped my finger as if it barred entrance to her treasure. I started to push another finger in, all while continuing to rub her clit lightly.

Our kissing continued, mouths wide open now, tongues battling for supremacy. I broke away only to kiss her face and neck, sucking her skin into me, wanting to possess all of her. "Oh God..." she whispered hoarsely.

My fingers began to push into her, halfway in, back out, slowly, gently, while my thumb continued its assault. She closed her eyes and winced as if in pain, but I knew she was stifling a moan of pleasure. Instead, she leaned into me and put her mouth on my shoulder. She let out a muffled groan as I thrust into her again and again. I could feel her begin to quiver now. I pulled my fingers out and heard her sigh with surprise. Bringing my fingers to my lips, I sucked in her juices as she looked at me with wide eyes. She blinked as I licked the remnants of her wetness and then moved my hand back down and up her dress.

She was breathing heavily now, trying to stifle her panting. Then I watched in wonder as her hands began to fumble with my belt and zipper. She was trying to free my straining cock! My mouth dropped and I glanced around. I gave a start as I saw the old woman across the aisle from us smiling at me and nodding her head, as if she approved. It was surreal. I turned back to Erin when she had successfully fished my shaft out of its confines. She gave it a squeeze, causing me to close my eyes and groan quietly. I looked around again as Erin began to pump my blood-engorged cock. The old woman was now talking to her husband and I was hoping she had lost interest in us. Then, when I turned back to Erin, I found her looking around conspiratorially also, seeking out any would-be peepers, ensuring our safety under the cover of innocent love.

Innocent? So far, far from it. Innocent love was five stops ago. Innocent love died somewhere in the MTA tunnels leading to Grand Central Station. Innocent love got washed away with all the dirt and grime off the metro North rail car we were in. No, this was illicit love. Taboo. Forbidden. Incest.

My throat went dry and my eyes widened as I watched Erin stand up and reach down. She bunched her dress up and up, until I could see the naked flesh of her milky thighs. She straddled me then, putting her knees on either side of my thighs. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. My lips parched and long absent from her own. We came together in a powerful kiss as she wrapped her arms around my neck again. My naked cock lurched, feeling the soft fabric that covered her sweet young pussy. I was dying and soaring to heaven. I ached to be inside of her and knew that this was the ultimate step to our damnation. It could not be. It should not be.

But we both knew it had to be.

Erin hugged me close and pressed her mouth to my ear. "Just rip it off," she whispered desperately.

It was all I needed to hear. Reaching into her dress, I found the cotton that barred my entrance and tore it off with a single yank. The delicate fabric gave way to my insidious assault and I pulled it out and stuffed her panties into my jacket pocket. Then, without a care of who was watching, who could see, who would know, Erin raised up on her knees. She reached between us and grasped my spear and impaled herself onto me. We both gave a muffled sigh as our mouths joined. She sank down onto me, all the way home, and I throbbed at her tightness.

"God, you're so tight, baby," I whispered. I groaned as she flexed her inner muscles and saw her wicked smile. Lusty minx.

I looked around and saw that there was only four other people left in our rail car and they were all at the far end, away from us. Erin and I were all but alone. In our cocoon, our solitude, our bridal suite, our own private nest. She began to gyrate her hips, forcing my shaft to touch every corner of her pussy, flesh to flesh, filling her completely. She was moaning lightly as she raised up and then back down. We began to make love as the train jostled on, moving in time with its destination towards our inevitable ending. Erin came up, held still for but a moment, then came down. My hands gripped her waist as I guided her up and down.

The rain poured on outside, pelting the windows of our haven, as the train rumbled on. Our love was silent and secretive. She rode me harder and faster as the train sped onwards. I was kissing her face, her neck, her lips. I couldn't get enough of her flesh. I needed her, wanted her, had to have all of her. And I whispered these words to her, causing her to groan with passion. "Oh God, baby...I...God.,..I have to come!"

I knew full well that Erin was not a virgin, but I had no clue whether she was on the pill. I let those decisions and those conversations happen between her and Janet. Not really a father's place. Well, neither was my cock, I thought ruefully. So I guess I should have cared before, so I would know if we were safe. But I really didn't care right now! What man does, in such a state of affairs?

"Erin...I...Jesus..." I struggled to hold off, as she continued to pump herself up and down my shaft. I looked at her face, contorted in pleasure and pain, knowing what was to come, a look of panic, wonderment, lust, and love. Her mouth opened in a silent scream and I knew she was climaxing now.

Her pussy clenched my cock as she rode her own wave of ecstasy up, up, up, and over. She was gasping for air and she hugged me tightly, burying her face in my shoulder. "Oh God, Dad! Jesus! I...we...we don't have any protection! I'm...I'm not on the pill."

Well that did it. I needed to pull out, lest we make the final, fatal mistake. I needed to pull out and come all over her belly and her legs. The train floor would be slick and sticky with my seed, but what did I care? It would be marked for all time and only we would know about it.

And yet, Erin did not let go. She gripped onto me for dear life, still fully impaled upon my throbbing cock, as she continued to shake in the throes of her passion. "Baby!" groaned. "I need to—Oh God!" I started to spurt and tried to push her off, but she held us together, glued at the hips, loins merged, cock in cunt, so primal, so wicked. The final taboo broken. I came and came, again and again, shooting jolts of steaming jizz deep inside her fertile womb. I was lost. We were cursed lovers. We were in heaven and falling to hell. But we loved every second of the ride!

As we descended from our summit, we kissed tenderly. She stroked my face and smiled tiredly at me. I helped her off of me and she straightened her dress. We looked around and saw that there was only one old man left at the far corner. He seemed to be asleep, oblivious of our incestuous union.

"Jesus, Erin. That was...fantastic. I love you."

"I love you, too, Dad. Always." She rested her head on my shoulder.

I looked around and saw the next station: Westport. "Shit, we missed our stop. By a long shot."

Erin and I laughed and decided to get off at this station. Moments later, we boarded on the return ride to our stop. About an hour later, we were running into the house, soaking wet, giggling and holding hands like young lovers. Janet was at the kitchen doorway, wiping her hands.

"My God, you two, where have you been? I've been worried sick. You're both almost two hours late. What happened? I called both your cellphones."

"Oh Mom, you know the train gets poor reception sometimes. The train had so many delays and it was crowded." Erin was better at this lying thing than I was, and I was glad for it—for once.

Janet turned to me and said, "Oh hon, look at your suit! It's soaked through. Here, take it off and hang it on the chair. I'll take it to the dry cleaners tomorrow so it doesn't get ruined. You two probably need a nice long hot shower. Now go. I'll have dinner heated up and ready."

Erin and I stifled our laughs and headed to our bedrooms. We shared one quick, secret kiss, before parting and heading to our own rooms.

And no, it would not be a wise idea to take that long hot shower together! At least, not in this chapter...