Trust Comes Easy Ch. 02

I looked at her. "A little leftover from my days on the road."

"Jesus Christ," she said. "I'm dating fucking Xena."

8.

When we got back to the apartment and Amanda was on the couch, reading one of the Roman history books. She got up and helped us put away the groceries. I made small talk with her while Kaye gave her total concentration to what she was doing. She didn't even look at Amanda once. Amanda's face gave no indication of whether or not she noticed the elephant in the room, or if it even bothered her.

I spent the entire time feeling every muscle in my body tighten, and each breath I took felt labored and strained. The knife sat in the pocket of my cargo pants, where I could feel the weight of it when I turned a certain way. It gave me comfort and made me nervous at the same time. And there was more than just the physical danger, there was the very real possibility that Amanda would follow through on her threat from last night by telling Kaye things I didn't want her to know, things that would put my marriage proposal off indefinitely.

When we were done the three of us walked back into the living room and Amanda said to Kaye, "She told you, didn't she?"

Kaye finally looked at Amanda. "Yes, she did. So I hope you don't think it rude of me to ask you to get the hell out of my place."

Amanda nodded. "That's fine, I understand."

She went over to her bag and started packing. I was amazed she was going so easily, without putting up a big fight. The look on Kaye's face said she was amazed too. "Can we...help you with anything?"

"No thanks," Amanda said. "I'm used to clearing out fast. Life of a fugitive and all."

Within a minute she was packed and ready. Amanda stopped in front of us and said, "Sorry if I caused you any trouble," then headed to the door. I looked at Kaye and she shrugged. We turned and watched Amanda go. The second her hand touched the doorknob I breathed a silent sigh of relief. Amanda stopped, almost like she had heard the sigh, like that was what she had been waiting for.

And that's when I knew I was fucked.

Amanda said, "Maggie said she told you everything." She turned to Kaye. "But are you sure she told you 'everything'?"

"I..." Kaye started, and then stopped. I saw something in her eyes that scared me. With all the crazy shit that ended up coming down that day, nothing shook me more than what I saw in her eyes. I saw doubt.

Amanda took a few steps towards us. "For instance, did she tell you how we met?" She stared at Kaye. "Hmm, I guess she didn't."

Suddenly I realized my hand was in my pocket, gripping the knife. I wasn't sure exactly when I put it in there. Normally I'm not a violent person, but it seemed Amanda brought out the worst in me. A decent amount of willpower was needed to make my hand let go of it. Instead I said, "Amanda, don't. Just leave. Please."

Amanda looked carefree about the fact that she was about to destroy my life. "And not tell your girlfriend the truth? Is your relationship not based on honesty?"

I looked at Kaye, and could see there was something else along with the doubt in her eyes. There was fear.

Amanda turned to Kaye. "Let me tell you a little story. I'm sure Maggie explained that I used to work on Wall Street. It's no picnic, especially when you're at the bottom. Right out of college and I'm working eighty-hour weeks, which doesn't leave much time to go to a bar or a club and find a mate. Hell, I usually didn't have time to shop for food. So one night I'm flipping the yellow pages for this Ethiopian place someone told me about. I couldn't find it under restaurants, so I just looked for Ethiopian. And that's when I came across another ad. Escort services. I figure, fuck, why not. I order take-out food, why not order take-out sex? So I call them up, and let me tell you, it was great. Sometimes a guy, sometimes a girl, sometimes both. Blonde, redhead, black, Hispanic, Asian...I tried all thirty one flavors."

Amanda walked over and stood behind me. "And when I got bored with everyone at the first agency, I called a different one. I was in the mood for a girl that time. And lo and behold, who shows up at my door..."

My eyes were on the floor. I couldn't stand the thought of looking up at Kaye. Amanda's hand touched my shoulder and I shrugged it off. "...but this stunning nineteen year-old." Amanda started to really get into it, letting her tone convey dramatic effect. "I was captivated. Not just by her beauty, for there were more beautiful, and not just for her brains, because there are far more college students hooking than you'd think." She took in a deep breath and let it out with a loud sigh. "It was her fire. I could sense it just by the way she stood there, all nervous energy, and the way she made love...it was obvious that she was different. So I started ordering her all the time. Like a favorite dish."

I managed to get my head up enough to steal a glance at Kaye, and it was even worse than I feared. The disappointment in her look made me catch my breath. I could feel the tears roll down my cheeks. Right then I just wanted to melt into the floor.

And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, Amanda delivered her last blow. "She's damaged goods Kaye. How do you like her now?"

By the time Kaye turned her stare from me to Amanda, the look on her face changed from disappointment to anger of the fire-breathing variety. "That's between me and her. It doesn't change the fact that you're about to leave."

Amanda smiled. "Oh, I think otherwise. You see, I have some business here for the next few days and I could use a place to stay."

"Find a hotel."

Amanda made a face. "Well, I suppose I could, but I like the sex here better, so I think I'll stay."

Kaye took three strides to the coffee table and picked up the phone. "Then I'll have to call the police."

"Wouldn't do that if I were you, unless you're interested in losing your job."

"You've got no control over that, bitch."

Amanda shook her head. "I knew you weren't that bright. Think about the press this will get, 'Fugitive caught after four years, right back on US soil.' 'Caught in ex-girlfriend's apartment with her new lover, a teacher of young children.'

Kaye started to dial. "And then we did the right thing and called the cops. They find out I'm a dyke and fire me...I hire a lawyer and they get a wrongful termination suit. You end up in jail where you belong. Everyone walks away unhappy. That's life."

I thought Kaye had her. I thought Amanda was going to grab her things and run to the door. But my ex-girlfriend just gave a big, wide smile. "And then there's the videotape."

I could hear the emergency operator come on the line. Kaye stood there, frozen, staring at Amanda, who added, "Imagine it getting to the press. You having sex with said fugitive...you smoking pot with said fugitive. It'll be on the Internet by the end of the day. Don't just say goodbye to your job, say goodbye to your career."

Kaye stood there, with the emergency operator asking if anyone is on the line. Finally Kaye said, "Sorry, I misdialed," and hung up the phone.

9.

We were in the bedroom. Amanda had left us alone, because she wanted to give us some time "in case we wanted to go at it". I don't think she meant sex.

Kaye was just staring at the door, and had been doing so for a good ten minutes. Finally I worked up the courage to say something. "Kaye, please believe me, I wanted to tell you the truth since two weeks after we met. That's when I realized I wanted to be with you the rest of my life. I just..."

She held up her hand without looking at me. "Stop! Just stop." Kaye continued to stare at the door as she spoke. "So, you were a hooker. Okay. I get that."

Suddenly I realized Kaye was freaking out. I'd only seen it once before, when her mom was in the hospital and Kaye talked about every fact like it needed to be verified. This wasn't going to be fun.

"So," she said, her voice a little too loud for what she was saying, "you slept with lots of people." Suddenly she turned to me and there was shock in her eyes. "Men? Did you sleep with men too?"

"No Kaye," I said in a calm, even voice. "I told you I've never been with a man in my life."

"And you're not just saying that because you already told me you didn't?"

"No. I didn't lie to you when I first said it and I'm not lying now. So calm the hell down."

"Calm down! How the fuck am I supposed to calm down? You were a fucking hooker!"

"And I was in a bad situation."

"I thought you had scholarships!"

"I did," I said. "But one of them dried up, or went broke, or whatever happens when they run out of money. Either way, I was halfway through school and I couldn't pay for the next semester. What was I supposed to do?"

"Not sell your body for money, that's one. Why not leave school for a while, work until you get enough money to go back?"

"There were lots of reasons."

"Like?" She had switched from freaking out to anger. But it was a stern anger, something I'd never seen in her before. Suddenly I realized this is the side the students who give her shit must see.

"Like I was afraid I wouldn't go back for some reason, or that I wouldn't be able to earn enough money. For Christ sake it was an Ivy League school, that's twenty thousand a year!"

"So instead you went for the easy solution."

"Easy? You think it was easy for me?"

"Yes, easy."

"You are such a hypocrite."

"What?"

I pointed my finger at her. "You are the biggest slut I know. Anywhere and everywhere you want to have sex. Bars, bathrooms, airports, your fucking parents house during Christmas dinner! And you want to have threesomes and who knows what next."

"It's not about the sex, Mags. You sold your body for money. You worked for an industry that exploits women."

I smiled. "Oh, so that's it. The Women's Studies minor you took finally kicking in?"

"Fuck you!"

"Fine, but first you listen. I wasn't some streetwalker with a pimp who beat me up for half my take. I was a freelance operator in the only business where I could make the kind of money I needed."

"Oh please!"

"No, it's the truth. And I wasn't alone. I met plenty, plenty of women and men using it to pay their way through college, to better themselves. Even if I quit school and worked three jobs it'd have taken me ten years to work up enough money. I wasn't trained in anything other than being a waitress. And not all of us grew up with rich parents from Connecticut."

That hit her. She became silent, but her face was still seething anger. I wanted to turn this all around, to get her to understand my side of things. I've feared this day for some time now, and what I told Kaye about wanting to come clean early in our relationship was true. Sure, there was the fear of being out with Kaye and running into an old co-worker, or even worse an old client, but mostly it had to do with my upbringing. I don't like lying, despite the fact that I'm obviously good at it. I wanted to counter that, to be up front with her, to be completely open and honest.

But there was another part of me, one that had wanted to see if I could go the rest of my life without telling anyone about escorting. Because despite the fact that it paid my way through college, and that it's such a large industry because people from all walks of life hire escorts, there is also a huge stigmatism attached to hooking in our society. I've kept in contact with a few of the men and women I'd worked with, and while many of them are now married or in a committed relationship, very few of them tell their partners, and the ones who have, ended up regretting it. One girl I worked with was married to a great guy who promptly left her when she decided to be 'open and honest' with him about her past. Another one was a guy who told his partner, and while the partner didn't leave him there's been obvious tension in their relationship ever since. Another guy told his wife and she took their kids and left for six months before he convinced her to come back. Honesty is great and all, but it comes at a price.

I decided to calm down and try to talk to her again. "Listen Kaye, I'm sorry."

"Sorry. Hmm. That's interesting. Are you sorry for lying to me or sorry I found out?"

And suddenly calm was out the window. It was all too much, and it had happened too fast. Twenty-four hours ago I was as happy as I'd ever been. I had the girl, I had the job, and I had a roof over my head. Now all of it was slipping from my grasp. And then a terrible thought entered my head. What if they were right? My parents, my friends, the kids at school, Robert Hanson, everyone who ever said my life was going to go down the tubes. It was happening just like they said. At that moment something snapped in my brain, and I lost it. I started screaming at Kaye.

"What the fuck do you expect of me, huh! Should I have told you on our first date? Our second? When's a good time to bring up the fact that I had sex for money? Or that I dated a wanted felon? Or tell you some sob story about how my parents threw me out easier than they tossed out trash? What's the common timing on that one? I'd like to know Kaye, because obviously I blew it! I blew it because I wanted you to stay! I didn't want to drive you off with all the shit I was trying to leave behind! So I guess that makes me a selfish bitch!"

The door opened and Amanda stood there looking at us. "You two really should learn to get along better." She walked over to the side of the bed. "Maybe you need some help. Both of you, strip. Now."

Amanda started taking off her clothes. Kaye and I just stood there, staring at her. She stopped and looked at us. "Do it now or I'll leave and drop the videotape in the mail. The envelope is already addressed. Principal Larry Woods. It was in your little book in the phone table."

Kaye looked at me and I could see the seething anger in her face again. I'm sure part of it was because of Amanda, but I couldn't help thinking that part of it was for me. We started taking off our clothes while Amanda climbed on the bed and lay down right in the middle. "Now, Maggie, why don't you climb up onto the dresser over there. On your knees, where you belong. Kaye, you climb on top of me here."

Kaye hesitated. Then she looked at me, turned and climbed on top of Amanda.

"I won't ask you to kiss me, that'd be a little too much, wouldn't it?" Amanda smiled at her. "Why don't you give my boobs a little loving?"

I couldn't see Kaye's face, but I had an idea what it looked like. Not happy. She tilted her head down and started with Amanda's right nipple. Amanda put her hand on Kaye's head and stroked her fingers in my girlfriend's hair. "Mmm. You do have a talented tongue." Amanda looked up at me. "Put on a show, like you used to. Remember how I like it?"

I bit my lip to keep from saying something I shouldn't. Then I started rubbing my hands all over myself, slowly. Over my chest, down to my breasts, over my nipples, down to my stomach and then over to my hips where I shook them a little, back and forth. Then I split them up and sent my left hand back up to my breast while my right one went down to my pussy.

Kaye had already switched to Amanda's other nipple. My ex-girlfriend exhaled sharply as my current girlfriend sucked hard. Amanda stared straight at me, her eyes locked on mine, as she said to Kaye, "Go down on me."

Kaye brought her head up for a moment and then moved her body down between Amanda's legs. My hand was between my legs now, with two fingers moving back and forth on my lips. My other hand was pinching my nipple.

An annoyed look crossed Amanda's face. "Come on now Maggie. At least look like you're enjoying it."

I sighed and put on a fake smile. It had been a long time since I had to work at looking like I was getting into it. Escorting only took up two years of my life, but within a few months I'd burned out a bit on sex. There were a few clients that I had such a genuine passion with that I never had to fake it, but after a while it became a job like any other. Sometimes it was more work to act like I was into it than it was to actually have sex.

I moaned and moved like I was turned on, but my mind was elsewhere. I realized I needed to come up with a plan. A way to get rid of Amanda without having Kaye's career ruined. I needed to find that tape. Find the tape and we're right back where Kaye said, calling the police. But wouldn't that still be bad for Kaye? Amanda could make all sorts of accusations, true and false, that could haunt my girlfriend forever.

"Oh yeah!" Amanda cried. Kaye's head was moving up and down, which meant she was really getting into it. Amanda looked at me and I pulled on my clit ring and a nipple ring and acted like I was getting turned on. Well, I was, a little, but my mind was coming to the conclusion that we had to find a way to make Amanda leave, a way that wouldn't make her so mad as to send the tape.

Amanda rode out her orgasm with her eyes still locked on mine. When it was over, Kaye brought her head up and I could see her back moving up and down as she tried to catch her breath.

"That was pretty sad, Maggie," Amanda said. "Last night you were much better. Got your mind on other things I guess. Why don't you come down here and see if you can make me come too."

I climbed down and took Kaye's place between Amanda's legs, while she made Kaye lay beside her. As I started licking and sucking up all her juices Kaye turned away. Amanda put her finger on Kaye's chin and directed her face to look back at me. I worked my tongue hard and then I slipped a finger inside Amanda. She started cooing and I centered my attention on her clit. Within minutes I had her riding high again, until she came in another orgasm. Breathing softly, she pushed Kaye aside and leaned up on her elbows.

"Very good," Amanda said. "You've managed to redeem yourself. Now I think we should get cleaned up, someone needs to prepare for this party tonight."

Christ, I'd forgotten about the party. That would be just great, two-dozen people hanging out with all this shit going on.

10.

Two hours later that was exactly what we had. Two dozen people hanging out, with no idea of what was going on. They didn't even know Amanda's real name. She had instructed Kaye and I that for the purpose of the evening we were to call her Michelle.

"Last night when you called me you said her name was Amanda," Kaye's friend Lucy said when introduced to 'Michelle'.

"C'mon," Kaye said with a very convincing smile on her face. "You know how I am about names. Hell, I keep pushing my family to use nametags at weddings and funerals."

By nine the party was going strong. I played hostess while Kaye did some last minute cooking in the kitchen. After making some rounds I went to check on my girlfriend. Kaye was alone, cooking chicken wings and cutting up vegetables and drinking wine. She looked up at me. "Everyone good out there?" she asked.

"Yeah," I replied. Glancing at the doorway, I added, "I'll find a way out this. I promise."

Kaye had gone back to chopping. She didn't look at me when she said, "Would you mind taking out the garbage please?"

I stared at her for a moment, then tied up the bag and carried it out of the apartment. Along the way I saw all the people having a good time. They had no idea how bad it was between Kaye and I or that a wanted felon was mingling amongst them. Amanda was on the couch, talking with some people, and when she saw me she smiled and winked.

Just as I got out into the hallway I saw Mike coming out of his apartment. I remembered my pledge to be more friendly and realized that this might be a welcome diversion from my problems. I said, "Hey, how are you?"

Tonight he was dressed in a pair of khaki pants and a nice button down shirt. His only response was to nod at me.