Trust Comes Easy Ch. 04

I smiled. "If you were straight."

She managed to smile back. "I'm in Hypothetical Land here, let me run with it."

"You can't blame yourself for how that kid was raised."

"Doesn't mean I'm not responsible. I disrespected Da'mon and every one of those kids by assuming they grew up like me. I didn't even think to learn anything about the environment they live in, and cut them some slack for it."

"That's funny, because from what I understand you're running just shy of Genghis Khan when it comes to discipline."

"There's a difference between making them behave and refusing to understand why they don't think like I do." Kaye looked straight at me. "Every morning before work, I stand outside of that school and remind myself that I've led a privileged life. Not everybody had parents like mine, who drilled right and wrong into their heads, even a little too much." She sighed. "And not everybody grew up with all the options I did. It should make a difference in how I treat them, because I can't help those kids unless I understand how they think. And I'm not going to do that unless I remember not everyone has been as lucky as me."

Kaye put her hand to the side of my face. "I do that for my kids every day, but I didn't do it for the woman I love the one time she really needed it."

Her arms went around me and she pulled me into a tight hug. It took me a moment to hug her back because earlier I thought we were practically finished. But feeling her body against mine made me realize that one of the reasons I love her is because she makes me feel safe.

"Are you crying?" she said without breaking the hug.

"I think so," I croaked. "Oh God, I don't know what I'd do without you."

"You'd survive. You did it long before you met me."

I broke the hug and looked at her, tears in my eyes. "Yeah, but I had no idea what I was missing."

Kaye wiped away my tears with her thumb. A few minutes later we decided to go back upstairs. But when we got in the elevator Kaye hit the button for the basement.

I said, "It's a little late for laundry."

Kaye just smiled. When the door opened she walked out, and with a frustrated sigh I followed her into the laundry room. She turned on the light and I could hear a machine going. Someone had clothes in the dryer, and Kaye looked at it and said, "Even better."

"What's even better?"

Kaye turned and stared at me. Then she pulled her top off and threw it aside, unhooked her bra and exposed her breasts.

I smiled, tore off my top and bra. The last three days were like one big argument, and this was the make-up sex. It became a race to get naked as Kaye got off her skirt and wedges and panties and I struggled out of my boots and black jeans. Going commando saved me some time, but she still beat me. So there we were, standing naked in the laundry room. Kaye was wearing a waist chain made of silver—

And suddenly she was all over me. Her lips, her hands, even her leg curled around mine. Her tongue chased after mine with a fierce determination, her hard nipples poked like blunt swords, and her pubic hair rubbed against my naked mound sending little shocks through my nerve endings. We were two bare bodies enjoying the warmth of being against each other, surrounded by a cool damp underground room that smelled like fabric softener.

There was the taste of stale booze in Kaye's mouth, but I knew more than alcohol fueled her right now. It was the perfect combination of love and lust, a sweet spot between romance and sex that we found with each other. Kaye pushed me back up against a wall as she groped my breast with one hand and caressed my mound with the other. I moaned when she left my lips and kissed down my neck until she took a nipple into her mouth. Then she bit down lightly, followed by a soft sucking while a finger slid between my lower lips, gliding back and forth on my wet, sticky folds. She ignored the other nipple and licked her way down my stomach as she got on her knees before me. Kaye put her face between my legs and stuck her nose into the cleft of my mound, breathing deeply and taking in the sweet and bitter smell. I put my fingers in place and exposed my sex to her. The first lick was long and slow, and I groaned an "Oh, Pookie."

With that Kaye went to work. Her tongue flicked and swirled, teased and taunted, glided over and then dug in. At one point she reached up with her right hand and got to the breast she didn't lick, caressing the globe at first and then pinching the nipple. I pressed my back against the wall while emitting sounds that encouraged her. Kaye slid a finger inside of me and started pumping it in and out, soon adding a second one that got me standing on my toes. And then for a brief second my mind flashed back to earlier today, remembering this was the exact position I had Maya in. I pushed the thought out of my head, put my hands on Kaye's and reminded myself right now was not about Amanda or tomorrow. I let myself float on my feelings for my girlfriend.

Kaye hooked her teeth in my clit ring and pulled as her fingers did an upstroke inside of me. I let out a cry of pleasure and she did it twice more before sucking my love button between her lips and triggering my orgasm. I almost toppled over her as I shook and screamed, but Kaye caught me with her one free hand. When her lips and fingers were out of my crotch area I slumped against the wall and slid down until I was seated in front of her. Kaye was smiling at me and I put a hand against the side of her face.

"That was incredible." I said between gasps.

Kaye pulled me to her and we hugged. "Nothing like a little stress to add to your sex life."

We sat there for nearly a minute hugging, until I pulled back and engaged Kaye in a kiss. It started out as a slow and sensitive lip lock, but quickly developed into a hungry, passionate smooch that led us to more sex. This time I took the initiative, getting on my knees while still kissing and pushing Kaye onto the ground. I broke the kiss and Kaye looked up at me lovingly. Suddenly I slapped her hard across the face.

"Ow!" she yelled, rubbing the side of her face. "What the hell for?"

I froze, dumbfounded. "I, uh, thought...you know, the whole forced to do things during sex thing?"

With an annoyed look, she said, "Well getting beat up isn't one of them."

"Oh. Shit. Sorry. If you could like, make a list, that would help."

When Kaye reached out and grabbed my head between her hands, I thought she was angry. Instead she smiled. "Thanks for trying." She pulled me closer and we kissed, and I moved so I could kiss the side of her face I hit. "That make it better?" I asked.

"Yes it did." Kaye smiled. "But I'm hurting elsewhere."

I laughed. "Tell Mommy where else it hurts."

Kaye ran her hands up and down her body. "Just kind of all over."

I leaned down and kissed her on her throat. "There?" I asked. With her eyes closed Kaye nodded, so I started licking and then sucking on her neck. When I did it a little too hard she cried, "Hey, it doesn't hurt that much there!" Kaye is always worried about getting hickeys where they can be seen. She didn't want her students picking on her.

I lay on top of her, straddling her left leg, and asked, "How about here?" My left leg came to rest on her pussy and I could feel the wetness on my skin. Pressing my body against hers, our lips came together and showered each other in affection. I started grinding my leg into her sex, the feeling of my skin against her most erogenous zone driving me like fuel. She began to rise and meet my thrusts, causing our breasts to meet as well and our nipples began to harden at the sensations. Then Kaye brought her leg up so it would rub against my pussy. It didn't make perfect contact, but complaining wasn't something for this moment. Our faces separated and stared at each other as we humped one another, our mouths agape and emitting strangled sounds, totally oblivious to anything but ourselves.

When Kaye said, "I want your mouth down there," I kissed her briefly, then pulled away and turned myself around so my face was at her pussy. I also straddled my legs over her head so we were in a sixty-nine. Grinding each other got us good and started; we were both wet and ready when the licking began. I slit my fingers into her easily, and Kaye's tongue met with no resistance as it dipped into my slit. My tongue circled, flicked, and sucked on her hood, and Kaye matched my movements to try and make us come together. Except that while I was fingering her slit, she moisturized her digits on my juice and ran them up my ass crack, centering on my rosebud. Slowly circling the crinkled brown hole, Kaye kept playing with it until it her finger slid inside. I cooed at the feeling, that widening of my back door. She only moved in to the first knuckle, and then gently fucked me. By now we were licking and sucking on each other's clits, and when Kaye sucked hard on mine it sent me over the edge.

"Ohhhhhh! My God!" I cried.

I took a few deep breaths and then continued to feast on Kaye. She kept working her finger in my ass, adding to my post orgasmic pleasure. Within minutes she joined me in that pleasure, and after we removed our fingers from each other I rolled off of her. We lay on the floor for a while, breathing heavily and rubbing each other's legs. Kaye's hand strayed down and she tickled the bottom of my foot, I yelped and did the same back to her. We laughed and helped each other stand up.

"What the hell!"

It was the old man from upstairs. He stood there with an empty laundry basket. We'd been so preoccupied with sex that we didn't notice the dryer had finished, probably a while ago. It was the second time that day I'd been caught naked, once on top of the building and this time underneath it. Kaye and I laughed as we hurriedly grabbed our clothes and ran out of there.

We got dressed on the elevator ride upstairs. "I was thinking," Kaye said. "After this is over, when Amanda is gone, we should move to a new place."

I felt a lump building up in my throat. Somehow I managed to swallow it and say, "Another apartment?"

"Or another city. Do something exciting like that."

"Are you really in the need for any more excitement after this weekend?"

Kaye smiled. "I just thought we could start fresh. You and me. After all this, starting over would be a good thing."

I nodded, knowing that after tomorrow I might not be there for her. With no feeling in my words I said, "Yeah. That'd be good." I looked up at her and forced a smile. Kaye smiled back and hugged me. The skilled liar does it again. I suck.

22.

The next morning I got ready like I was going to work, as normal. Kaye usually leaves before I do, and when she came over to give me a kiss I gave her a long, passionate one. Our tongues intertwined and our arms encircled and I held her as tight as I could without hurting her. We broke the kiss but stayed in the hug.

"Wow," she said. "What was that for?"

I swallowed and tried not to sound nervous. "For last night. For being you." I reached up and pushed some hair out of her face. "For being wonderful."

Kaye smiled, and at that moment I realized that despite all I'd been through so far in life, all the hardship and all the loss and all the pain, nothing would ever hurt me more than losing her. It felt like the greatest and saddest moment of my whole life.

"I've got to go," Kaye said. She kissed me again, opened the door, and made quick eye contact with me before she closed it.

I continued to stare at the closed door as Amanda walked up behind me. "We've got to get ready," she said, and I followed her to the bedroom where she told me to pack a few things in a small bag. She would buy me new clothes, better clothes (i.e. clothes she liked) when we got to where we were going. I picked a few items, not taking it seriously since I knew we wouldn't get very far. Amanda sat on the bed and watched me, probably to make sure I didn't leave any notes for Kaye. As I finished up I saw Mr. Pookie still on the bed. I grabbed him and stuffed him in the bag. Amanda might have gotten suspicious if I left him behind.

"I'm finished," I said solemnly, trying to act like I would if we were about to leave. Meanwhile I was trying not to show my fear about what was really going to happen. "I've got to eat something before we go. I don't fly well unless I eat."

"Take your time. We're not leaving for a while."

That surprised me. "Why not?"

"Less time at the airport. Plastic surgery and fake documents aside, I don't like taking chances."

So I went to the kitchen and made myself a bowl of cereal. I also fixed a glass of orange juice, took the bottle of potassium cyanide out of my pocket and poured some in. This was my plan. Every morning Amanda had a glass of orange juice. Putting it in there would hide the almond smell. After she was dead I'd strip her naked and drop her into the tub, and then go downstairs and get the supplies out of the car. The gloves, goggles and painters mask would help protect me when I poured the hydrochloric acid on her body, dissolving all her soft tissue and sending it down the drain. Then I'd use the hammer and chisel to break apart the bones, put them in the bucket and cover them with the lid. Gather up her clothes and stuff and take them to the drop off box for the homeless shelter down the street. Go bury the bucket in the empty lot behind an abandoned building two towns away. Come home and throw up.

I brought the glass out to Amanda and set it in front of her, then sat in the other chair and continued to eat my cereal. She was working on her computer, and she didn't look at the glass. I didn't want to be obvious and point it out, so I just kept eating. Amanda shut down her computer and packed it away with the rest of her stuff. Then she got up and took the Rembrandt print off the wall.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"My father gave this to me," she said. "I gave it to you because I thought you were like him, and me." She took the print out of the frame and rolled it up, then put it next to her bag. "But I was wrong."

"Huh," I said. "I think that's the greatest compliment you've ever given me." I finished my cereal and got up. "Aren't you going to drink your juice?" I asked.

"No. It's all yours."

I felt a pain in the bottom of my stomach. "Don't you drink one of these a day?"

"Not when I fly. Maybe you need to eat, but I can't have anything in my stomach when I get on a plane."

And just like that my plan went to shit.

"Okay," I said, picked up the glass and headed to the kitchen. Just as I turned the corner I started bringing the glass to my lips like I was going to drink it, in case she got suspicious. As soon as I was out of sight I lowered the glass and poured it down the sink, then ran the water and washed out the glass in case I wasn't here when Kaye got home. Which was looking very likely.

Now what? There was no way I could leave with her. For a brief moment I considered waiting until we got to wherever we were going, but that involved being around unfamiliar territory and people. Then I realized that Amanda might have people she knows at our final destination, people who will meet us at the airport, who are living where we're living. Would I have to kill them too?

No. Now was the time and here was the place. My mind started racing as my eyes looked around the kitchen for a weapon. It didn't take long for them to settle on the knife set. Back to my original plan. I took a big one out and reached behind me, slid the handle into the waistband of my jeans so the blade was flat against the small of my back, covered it with my T-shirt and reminded myself to be careful about how I moved. Just as I started walking out of the kitchen, Amanda turned the corner and I froze in place.

"It's time," she said.

I nodded, and she dropped her bag by the door before walking me into the bedroom to grab my bag. Then she turned and I followed her out towards the foyer. My hand reached behind me. Amanda took her jacket off the coat rack, her back still to me. I slid out the knife. Amanda was putting on her jacket and I came up behind her. But I hesitated, and she turned towards me. I hid the knife behind my leg.

"Shit, the print." She walked towards the living room to get the Rembrandt print. I put down my bag and followed her. When she leaned down to pick it up, I was right behind her.

It was now or never. I raised the knife, but then fear gripped me, and I hesitated again. Amanda stood and turned. She saw the knife. I lunged, swinging the knife down towards her chest. It stopped inches from the target. Amanda's hand had a vice grip on my wrist, and I cried out as she twisted it. The knife clattered to the floor and she spun both of us around, sending me flying into the foyer. As soon as I hit the floor I struggled to get up, but Amanda was right there and she shoved me hard against the wall. She gave a karate chop to my side and then landed a punch to my lower back. I slid to the floor.

Amanda walked away and I struggled to turn over. I had thought of her strength and reflexes as very animal-like, and now I knew her rage was that of a serial killer. By the time I rolled over she was coming back towards me, and in her hand was the knife.

"This is the Maggie I used to know," she said with a smile on her face. "The one with the fire. Too bad you decided to use it like this."

Amanda kneeled and grabbed my shirt, pulling me towards her and pushing the tip of the knife against my throat. "You were so close Mags," she said. "So close to living a very comfortable life. Now you've shown me that you can't be trusted. And I can't risk that." I winced as I felt a pain and then a trickle of blood running down my neck. "Any last words?" she asked.

I spit in her face. She smiled. "I'll take that as a no. Well I've got some last words to you. Better luck in the afterlife."

Amanda was about to strike when suddenly the front door opened and Kaye stepped in. She wasn't supposed to be off work for hours, but since she interrupted my murder I wasn't going to complain. Kaye looked at us, me lying on the floor beaten and Amanda holding a knife to my throat, and without missing a beat she said, "Am I interrupting something important?"

The knife came away from my throat. Amanda stood and smiled. "Just irony in action. I wanted Maggie back, and I was threatening to kill you to do it. Then, she goes and tries to off me with this." Amanda held up the knife. "That must make you feel real special."

Kaye smiled back. "Actually, it does. So do me a favor while I'm enjoying this moment. Get your shit and get the fuck out of my place."

Amanda laughed. "Fine. But say goodbye to your job bitch.

Kaye smiled. "I already did."

Two jaws dropped. "You quit?" I heard myself say.

"Yep," Kaye said. She turned to Amanda. "So you can leave now. And I'd be quick about it."

Amanda turned the knife towards Kaye. "Why's that?"

Kaye looked at her watch. "Because right about now Maggie's friend Lisa is calling the cops. They'll be here soon."

For the first time since she got here, Amanda looked stunned. Then she ran into the living room. Kaye put down her bag and then came over to help me stand up. "We'll talk about this later."

Amanda came back with the print and said, "I need one more thing before I go."

I said, "If it's a kiss, you can kiss my ass."

Amanda took a gun out of her jacket and pointed it towards us. Suddenly I knew what was in her lockbox.

"Okay," I said, "I take it back."

Amanda smiled, and said, "I want Mr. Pookie."

I felt my breath catch in my throat. "What for?"

"That's my business."

I opened the bag and took out my doll. Tears were welling up in my eyes. "Why do you have to take him?"

"Just give him to me."

Sense completely left me at that point, and I said, "No!"