TV Temp: Christina HendricksbyRobertdoc©
It took six months after meeting and being with Jenna Fischer to earn another temping job on "30 Rock." As it turned out, it took two months longer than that for my experiences with Tina Fey to pay off for my next gig. But I didn't blame Tina -- especially considering what show asked for me.
Instead of an award winning NBC cult comedy, an award winning cult drama wanted my services for a few weeks in mid-July 2009. I would take a trip back to the '60s and into the world of "Mad Men" -- although technically they filmed in Los Angeles in the present day. But I would play a small part in making sure that it still looked and sounded like the '60s, as if Matthew Weiner and company weren't thorough enough.
The temp agency didn't tell me that I got a recommendation from celebrities this time. However, it did not escape me that Tina had gotten "Mad Men" star Jon Hamm onto "30 Rock" a few months after I left. It may have sounded crazy to think that Tina had recommended me to Jon in case "Mad Men" needed a temp, and that he helped get the ball rolling as a favor to her. But having sex with Jenna and Tina last year was just as crazy; even to me and I actually did it.
Yet just because I got that lucky twice, I wasn't going to assume that the third time would be another charm. But considering that "Mad Men" was filled with lovely ladies like January Jones and Elisabeth Moss, stunning guest stars like Alison Brie and goddesses like Christina Hendricks, the thought didn't completely escape my mind.
Still, even after my past TV work, it remained outlandish to think I had this power over sexy TV stars. If I had to have a superpower, I would have preferred it to be one where I got a permanent job and/or a book published.
However, with my freelance work now starting to take off and provide a steady income, money and regular job searches weren't as big of a concern at the moment. I would now lose good money by taking days off at the site, but "Mad Men" would give me enough to balance it out.
Connecting with another actress would be something, especially one on this show. Yet if I made that as the goal, I knew I would be disappointed and it would ruin the experience of actually being on the "Mad Men" set. Besides, not expecting it yielded great results with Jenna and Tina, so I wasn't going to mess with a winning formula.
If it happened, it would probably be a sign that I'd have to die soon for having that kind of luck. If not, at least I'd still settle for working on the show and being near the likes of Hamm, Hendricks and the others.
I didn't confirm my suspicions that Jon made a recommendation for me thanks to Tina, and I wasn't going to ask him and risk total disaster. As usual, I just did my jobs, enjoyed seeing everyone do theirs, and was courteous and got courtesy in return.
One awkward moment did come on July 13, when I was tasked with alerting Christina Hendricks that she was needed on the set. I went over to the door of her dressing room and noticed that it had been left open ajar.
I was about to shrug it off and knock anyway, until I heard a very low moan. The kind of low moan that I had heard up close from Jenna and Tina; but if possible, this one was even deeper and huskier.
Since the door was slightly open, I could take one peek without getting caught. One was all I needed to see that Christina was in her chair, in her trademark Joan Holloway red dress -- only she had to hike it up above her knees so that she could reach below it and touch herself while sitting down.
That one split second look painted quite a picture -- and I presumably could have looked for a split second more. She didn't seem to notice me as her eyes looked closed, and given my recent circumstances, it could have had quite an end result. But I was still of my own sound mind to know that just because things worked like that with Jenna and Tina, it didn't mean Christina was the same.
Christina was the first actress I saw masturbating before I got naked with her, so that could have said something about her sexual appetite. However, she was engaged and I had already rationalized adultery once. And while I was able to hold off my decision to go all the way with Tina until the end, I knew that would be impossible with Christina.
Somehow, I had all these thoughts running through my brain in the split second after I peeked at her. And in that next split second, I went back behind the door and knocked like I was hired to do in the first place.
"Mrs. Hendricks? They need you on the set now, ma'am," I called; before remembering to actually close the door. I did quietly close it right before I heard her say "Oh....oh yes, of course. Tell them I'll be right there, thank you."
Since that was all she had to say, I presumed she either hadn't noticed me peeking after all or didn't want to bring it up. In any case, I technically only looked for one second, which shouldn't have been fast enough for her to catch me.
Maybe she heard me closing the door; that could have made her draw conclusions. But in any case, I went away before she emerged from her dressing room, and nothing came out of it for the rest of the day. I made extra sure not to look at her awkwardly when she was on the set; and since I was already training myself not to ogle her, it wasn't that hard.
That kept me from wondering what I would have saw if I looked a little longer, at least until I got home. Her dress was still on and she was sitting down, so her famous, unbelievable chest and behind wouldn't have been exposed for me to see anyway. Her long bare legs were the next best thing, yet I only knew that from a second of evidence.
Somehow, I had enough will power even then to remember not to get in trouble, and to remember that she would most likely throw me off the set if she had noticed me. But it wasn't like I was a saint, since I searched for the best red carpet pictures of Christina's cleavage online to help "relieve me" when I got home.
For the next two days, things went on as normal and I didn't catch Christina or anyone else masturbating again. In any case, something else happened to distract me on set on July 16, since that was when the Emmy nominations were announced. At the time, "Mad Men" Season 3 was being filmed, but today it had topped the Emmy nominations for Season 2.
It would be favored to get its second straight Best Drama award, while Jon, Elisabeth and John Slattery were up for individual awards. But Christina was snubbed for the second straight year, so I had an extra reason to avoid more awkward encounters with her. I was delighted to hear that "The Office" "30 Rock" and Tina had their share of nominations too, although Jenna was snubbed as well.
Yet thanks to the "Mad Men" nominations, there would be a party in the studio to celebrate after work was over. I stayed behind to do some cleaning up and double checking on the set, but since the cast and crew left early, I got enough of a head start that I could leave on time. Some other workers who had to stay behind left earlier, although I was in no real hurry to go.
This left me all alone right when I was about ready to finish up. Once I completed a final run through of the Sterling Cooper set, I headed for the exits before I saw someone come in. After I recognized who it was, I figured I should be in more of a rush to go.
"I was just finished running through the set, Mrs. Hendricks. I'll be right out of your way," I reassured Christina as I made my way to pass her.
"You can just call me Christina, you know," she answered in a lighter voice than her usual silky tone on the show. "There's no need to really be that formal."
"Oh....better safe than sorry, I suppose." I reasoned, with the exit in my sights.
"Well, after you saw what you saw, you should be on a first name basis with me."
So she was waiting to get me alone before she threw me out and got me fired. Pretty logical, actually. But I figured I should at least defend myself once before she called security. "I swear, I barely saw anything.....I looked away right away and I didn't tell anyone!"
"I know....at least I knew the first two parts," she said to my deep confusion. "I saw something in the corner of my eye for just one second, and then a second later you knocked. When I heard the door close, I remembered I was in too big a rush to shut the door all the way. And that helped me figure out what was in my eye....for only one second."
I didn't know to feel encouraged or weary that she at least knew how long I was out there. "You could have had quite a story to tell or sell to every man in America. So why did you actually do your job anyway?"
"I, um....better safe than sorry again, I guess. I shouldn't have seen it, you caught me anyway, and I didn't want to lose a temp job on this show just for a story to tell."
"Especially since you could fill in the blanks when you got home?" Christina pressed on.
"Uh....whatever the least offensive answer is, that's my answer," I said with nothing better on my mind.
"Well, at least you did stick to your imagination. I was wound up and I wanted to get....that out of the way before work. I tried to do it quick and quiet, but I guess it wasn't quiet enough. Since you were quiet, I should probably thank you."
"You're welcome, probably," I echoed. "Did, uh, did you leave the party just to tell me that?"
"No, I just wanted to get away for a while." That was probably as good a cue to leave as any.
"All right, I'll give you your privacy then." I wanted to do that right then before this got any more awkward. Yet it popped into my mind that I owed her more than a brush off for not being furious at me. "Thank you for understanding....that I was just trying to do my job and nothing else."
"I don't think many people would be that committed to their job. Especially if it was just temporary," Christina theorized.
"I suppose since I just have temporary jobs, I know the value of keeping them. Not that I turned away just to keep my job! I knew it was wrong regardless. I mean, I knew I was wrong, not you. I mean, you have every right -- not that it's my business-"
"It's all right. I know what you mean, even if you keep adding on to it," Christina assured. "You are dedicated to being professional. I guess that's another reason why Jon helped get you on,"
Now I had an extra reason not to make a hasty retreat after all. "What's that, now?"
"I overheard Matt say that Jon recommended you when your resume came up. But he also said that it was a favor to Tina Fey too. Did you work for her when Jon was on '30 Rock'?"
"Not back then...I was a temp for that show last November," I answered in a bit of a daze.
"You temped for her during that month?" Christina asked with a bit of a chuckle.
"I know, I know, that's why I tried extra hard not to screw anything up. She was busy enough as it was," I went on, dancing around how else I helped her out. "I suppose she noticed....she must have if she thought of me months later."
"Did you cover up for dirty stuff there too?" Christina asked as a joke, although I needed to think through my answer seriously.
"Nothing like that, no. She was just professional and brilliant. But I'm sure Jon already filled you guys in on that," I predicted.
"It's cool he's already branching out and working with people like that," Christina stated, and I was inclined to agree; even before I found out that he and Tina helped get me here. "I guess he's setting the bar for me and the others."
"I'm sure you'll get those kinds of breaks as well," I assured now that I was finally feeling comfortable around her. "You've obviously caught a lot of eyes already. Even if the Emmy voters aren't seeing clearly quite yet." I preemptively jumped on that topic in case I had set her up to complain about the Emmys, and how people might still see her more as a sex symbol than an actress.
"Don't worry, their eyesight's not a problem. Matt told me I've got some big stuff coming up to impress them next year anyway. Besides, I've had plenty of time to get a thick skin over worse stuff. You have to when people aren't usually hiring someone with my....appearance. But I worked damn hard to be proud of it anyway."
"Well, that makes it better that the right people came around too, I guess." I theorized, now that I was getting bolder and more frank. "It makes no sense that people other than Matt weren't that smart to make....someone like you a star. Most people love when.....certain parts are huge, so they shouldn't complain if the waist isn't stick thin either. I can't imagine that your fiancée does."
I was still refusing the temptation to knowingly flirt with Christina now that we had cleared the air. She didn't seem to be flirting with me, so I figured bringing up her actor fiancée Geoffrey Arend now wouldn't make a difference.
"Of course he doesn't. There's just been less time for him to appreciate it, that's all. We're both so busy working on sets and on wedding stuff, so it gets kind of frustrating. That kind of helps explain what you....got a glimpse of."
"Right, right...." I said, now that I remembered why I was a bit nervous to talk to her in the first place. "I'm sure it'll get better soon....not that it's my business, of course."
"You don't have to keep saying that. I'm the one who brought it up, so I obviously don't mind talking about it," she pointed out.
"I guess you've got me there. I just don't want to overstep my bounds....you probably hear about stuff like this too much from men who aren't that considerate."
"I told you, I've got a thick skin for stuff like that. I've heard every good, bad, sweet or offensive thing about my body that there is to say. I just get offended if the wrong person is talking about it, and you're going out of your way to prove you aren't that guy. Maybe a bit too much."
"Well, I....I guess I feel like I have to go over the top. Otherwise I'd probably go over the top in the other way. Not in the bad way, like Joan's husband did!" I backtracked. "I mean...in the way where you get me so....bothered that I can't do my job. Even if I did....what you did in the dressing room, it would probably work for so long once I saw you again."
"So you're just as pent up as I am, then?" she noticed. "I guess we've already proved that it can affect our job performance. And we certainly can't let that hurt the show....so...."
I had to get out my dwindling concerns now before I got a heart attack. "Wait...your fiancée?"
"Like I said, better to get it out now so it doesn't affect work again later."
"But, but aren't they expecting you back at the party?"
"I'll just say that I went home early. They're probably leaving now anyway....so we have a good deal of time."
We have time. In my "time" with Jenna and Tina, I had to rush things a bit; with Jenna when she had to be on the set in a half hour, and with Tina when we wanted to get our fantasies out of our system. Yet if Christina was right and we didn't have to rush this.....this would be a good time to finally take my time with a seductive actress.
So as I first feared, I dismissed my moral and ethical concerns quicker than I did before. But instead of giving in right away, I rationalized that I could hold off a few seconds more while heading to a better location. "Do you mind if we use that time in your dressing room?"
It was a more private place with a door that we'd remember to keep closed, and it made sense considering how this started. Christina understood right away and signaled for me to follow her. We found our way to her dressing room and made sure no one was watching; but considering that she was starting to walk with her Joan Holloway wiggle, I would have had a hard time noticing otherwise.
Finally we made sure the coast was clear before Christina let me into her dressing room this time. There was no couch in here, since it was a dressing room and not a trailer or office. Yet I was confident I could make due.
I got particularly confident when I got to the center of the room and Christina came up to me. I finally allowed myself to smile at her, even though it was still a slightly bashful one. Her smile was warmer and more seductive, which made me even more pleased when she placed her full red lips right on mine.
The last of my nerves melted away as I melted into Christina's body and embrace. Yet again, I had switched from a nervous fan boy into an eager lover at the drop of a hat. But since this was my third time, it was time for me to start use different tactics.
After I savored how her bosom pressed against my chest and put my hands on the glorious curves of her waist, I broke off and said "Stay there for a minute."
Christina did stay still as I moved to get behind her. Once I stood up against her back, I searched until I found the zipper of her dress. I started to pull it down and stared intently at the naked flesh it started to expose; which made it more noteworthy that my crotch was nearly pressing against her ass.
Christina slipped her arms out of the dress as I now began to see the back of a white bra. Once her arms were free and she started to pull the rest of her dress down, I saw more than that; particularly the cream colored white panties that strained to cover her backside. That inspired me to put my groin closer against said backside, as I wrapped my arms back around her waist and started kissing her neck.
Which in turn put me in a position to look a bit down her neck.
As good as photographers were in getting cleavage shots of Christina; and as much as she gave them the opportunity to with her red carpet dresses; the view I had down her bra made them all complete, rank amateurs. "Man, oh man...." I said although I barely registered that I had moved my lips.
Christina chuckled and moved her hand back to move up my arm. Now that she was trying to touch me, I remembered that I was more over dressed than she was. "Oh, right, sorry!" I blurted out as I stepped back and started to remove my shirt while I walked back in front of her.
I managed to focus on taking my shirt off even as I got a full frontal look at her body covered in just a bra and panties. I even had the mental capacity to get my shoes off and start removing my pants as well. Then I bent down to get them and my underwear off and put all my clothes in a pile.
Before I could lift myself back up, I got a look at Christina's legs as I was halfway bent down. I then remembered one of the sex acts I told Tina that I had fantasized about with her; and that I didn't quite get to do it. But this was a fairly good chance to fix that.
"Keep standing still, please," I said once I got completely naked. Once I saw that she wasn't moving, I got on my knees right in front of her. I tore away from her eyes and bra and looked over to her long, shapely legs; the same legs that my hands was caressing right now.
My gaze fully turned to her left leg as my hand rubbed the taut flesh behind it. I then started to kiss the taut flesh in front of it below her knee. My eyes looked up to see that she was pleased with my actions, and I kept looking up to make sure as both my hands moved up and down her leg. But she had another one of those left, so I shifted over to start playing around with her right leg while keeping a hand on her left.
As my other hand moved up the right leg, it came into contact with something else. I looked up to see that this something was Christina's pulled down panties.
I backed off slightly to give her room to get them all the way off, leaving her pussy fully in view. I still willed myself to take my time before getting to that, so I kissed further up her right leg while my hands now rubbed the sides of both legs. Eventually, my hands got right to her wide hips and realized there was no barrier left to what was behind them.