TV Temp: Jenna FischerbyRobertdoc©
This is the first part of a series where a TV fan gets to do temp work for his favorite shows and get close to his favorite TV beauties -- who are coincidentally my favorite TV beauties. Forewarning: none of them come from reality shows, E! programs or the Disney Channel.
One never realizes how fast time flies until they actually think about it. After I graduated from college in May 2007, I thought time was just dragging on; but that was probably because I couldn't find a job. Now in March 2008, I can really take stock in how fast 10 months can go.
10 months ago I was a college graduate, and yet I was rushing on graduation night to catch the Season 3 finale of my favorite TV comedy "The Office." Now fast forward almost a year to me being on "The Office" set and comforting one of the stars.
In fact, it was the very same one who happened to be my first celebrity crush.
But maybe a bit of rewinding is required before we get that far ahead.
With few journalism jobs available after graduation, I had to settle for looking for temp jobs. On a lark, I sent my resume to a Hollywood temp agency, since writing in "the business" was my second career choice. That was the period where time slowed to a crawl; at least until the agency called back and said they had something for me.
This brings us up to February 2008, when the TV branch of the agency offered me a few weeks of temp work on.....well, I think you can already guess what show it was. Now that the writers' strike was over, shows across the board were rushing to complete their abbreviated seasons. And "The Office" needed an extra hand or two for a few weeks to help with meager tasks along the way.
While this was temp work that would divert me from finding a real job and career, I was too star struck to care. Being near TV favorites like Steve Carell, Rainn Wilson, John Krasinski and the staff that helped them make me laugh each Thursday night; that sounded better than refreshing my e-mail box for resume rejections.
There was one other "Office" star I didn't mention right away, but I figured that she deserved extra exposition.
While I was a fan of many actresses, I didn't exactly "crush" on them -- not even the supermodels and traditional sex symbols. You can ask me to explain why Jenna Fischer, a.k.a. Pam Beesley, was the exception, but I doubt I could answer that well. As an aspiring writer, that is probably a bit troubling.
Part of it is probably how her years of toil, odd jobs and bit parts before breaking out on "The Office" put some of my job problems into context. Part of it was because I was obsessed with Jim and Pam's three-year long struggle to get together like any other "Office" fan. Part of it could also be because she seemed like one of those "they're just like us" regular celebrities for fans to look up to, in those pre-Twitter days when having a MySpace page to talk with fans was cool. And the fact that both Pam and Jenna were deceptively plain and actually quite gorgeous played a role as well.
Why she caught my eye like that before any another megastar actress did is harder to put into words. But it probably makes more sense considering what happened when I met her.
While I was nervous to meet Jenna, the cast and crew, I knew my duties would keep me from talking to them for too long, so I focused on remaining professional. In any case, Jenna had announced her separation from then-husband James Gunn back in September, came off a really bad fall in May and was robbed of the Best Supporting Actress comedy Emmy in September as well. So I figured she had better things to think about than a temp fawning on her.
So I put those star struck thoughts out of my mind while I did my job; or at least kept them locked up until I got home. I spent half my time doing tasks for the crew and the other half for the cast, with sides appreciating my efforts. Jenna always thanked me for my help when she needed something, so I was glad to see I wasn't wrong in idolizing her.
And I wasn't wrong about idolizing everyone else, especially in moments where I got to see them filming. What's more, I got a first-hand look at some intriguing material about Jim planning to propose to Pam. It seemed the days of worrying about those two were over indeed.
But it turned out to be a different case for the real life Pam, as I learned in the middle of my second week.
I had been asked to deliver a few papers and notes to Jenna's trailer that afternoon. Since I had already done this a few times, my initial nervousness at being in her trailer had passed to a point. So I knocked on her door like normal and she let me in as normal. Yet the fact that her eyes were a bit watery and they hadn't been completely wiped of tears wasn't normal.
If I had come a few minutes later, she might have fully composed herself and I would have been able to go before she broke down again. But the timing didn't work that way, as she saw how I was analyzing her eyes and wasn't able to compose herself much longer.
The last several difficult months had been weighing hard on Jenna, as I had suspected/feared. Ever since her tumble down a staircase in May, her difficulties had been piling up, helped in no small part by her in-progress divorce. Her work load on "The Office" and in movies like "Blades and Glory" was helping, yet she wouldn't have the show to get her through the summer. As she explained it, this was one of those times where it was hard for her to cope and believe that things would turn around soon. She had had a few of those times already, and she figured that they would keep coming for a while now.
She did try to apologize for crying in front of me, but I tried to dismiss it as gently as I could. All I could do was listen anyway, in between trying to figure out what to say when I could finally talk. Despite being a would-be writer, it is far easier for me to think of the right things to say when I'm typing on a computer and can plan out my words. When I have to improv and talk in real life, it is harder for me to think and speak on my feet.
Maybe that's why I said what I said, since I had been thinking it over for months and I needed something that I wouldn't stumble over. If I had more time to think it through, I probably wouldn't have said it since it could have come across as personal and creepy. But as Jenna was questioning how she would start over, this was the best response I could think of.
"You know, you guys aired last year's finale on my graduation day," I started, even though I was sure bringing that up would confuse Jenna at first. "Even though it was such a big day, I was still making sure that I'd get home in time to see it. And when I saw you smile when Jim came back, it was worth it."
This was bordering on the creepy stuff I wanted to hold back, so I got to my point faster. "It was the biggest day of my life, but seeing that made it even better for me. If you can make that kind of impact on a fan on a day like that, then there's no way you won't win over other people. Heck, you already made an impact by being the first celebrity I ever crushed on, so there you go."
By then I was pretty sure I'd be kicked out for that kind of babbling, so I got back to my serious points while I could. "Okay, I, I know that was Pam who got the happy ending and big smile, but that was you too! I'm sure you'll get that back just like she did! There can't all be Roy's and Karen's in the way, right?"
Now that I was out of words, I was more aware that I had crossed a line somewhere. Since I had to improv again and it wasn't my specialty anyway, I figured it was time to go. "Okay.....well, they want you back on set in a half-hour....just so you know."
I didn't bother to look at her after I said that stuff about her smile, and I certainly wasn't going to look now. I had already imagined some pretty negative reactions, and I at least wanted to get out of the trailer before I could see them come true.
Fortunately, I just had to help the crew for the rest of the next two days....and I supposed it was a good sign that I was still allowed to come to the set.
Once I started helping the cast again, I only saw Jenna on the set and had to get things for her while everyone was watching. I did manage to gradually look at her again, and I eventually realized she was smiling at me as if nothing had happened. Maybe she was cried out, or maybe she was too busy with other things to call me out for being too forward. Either way, I took whatever relief I could get.
It was a particular relief since this was my last week as a temp, so at least this wouldn't hang over my final days. By the end of the week, I thought less about my speech to Jenna and focused more on savoring the rest of the experience while I could.
Yet it started to look like I wouldn't be that lucky at first on my next-to-last day.
Since I was leaving tomorrow, a few of the actors and crew members had said their goodbyes and signed their memorabilia for me while they could. But Jenna didn't come to me with any of those things, which I tried not to be surprised about.
I had just come to terms with it when I was told that Jenna wanted to see me in her trailer.
As it was my first time back there since that speech and I didn't have anything to get for her, that negative imagination of mine ran rampant again. So I promised to take her offended words in stride and just hoped she wouldn't have this put on my resume. As if it wasn't enticing enough to those in Hollywood.
I finally knocked on the trailer door and was let in, then walked the steps to see Jenna standing nearby in her usual Pam clothes. I tried not to let that affect me, since this wasn't actually Pam Beesley and I hadn't confessed to crushing on Pam.
She walked past me and closed the trailer door, giving me a few final seconds to prepare myself. In those seconds, I swore to let her speak and/or yell before I tried to weakly defend myself.
"First of all....thank you."
That made me speak earlier than I wanted, even though I only said "Huh?"
"What you said....it got my mind off of things, that's for sure. I was thinking about the bad stuff too much, but I can get back to normal if I'm distracted. Your speech distracted me and got me through the day....so thank you."
I still half expected there to be a "But" and a lecture after that, so I got in a bashful "You're welcome" while I could.
"Second of all....did you mean all of it?"
I read between the lines well enough to know that "it" meant the stuff about my crush, or at least part of it did. Since I was starting to sense that I wasn't in trouble, I spoke honestly, even though being honest got me into this mess. "Well....sure I did. It was the wrong time to say it, but I did mean it."
"No, no, it was fine," Jenna replied, looking a tiny bit flustered herself now. "I just.....I'm just kind of new to hearing things like that about me, that's all. I mean, a lot of fans say great stuff about me and Pam. But your stuff was pretty unique. I know it probably isn't for other celebrities, but it is to me."
"Well, um, I'm sure you'll hear more stuff like that in the future from fans. I'm glad I could set the bar a bit," I responded. Now I was feeling comfortable enough to kid around, despite still expecting the other shoe to drop soon. Given that this was going so well, something had to screw it up and balance it out.
"I'm glad too. I just wanted to tell you before tomorrow....so thank you again. You've been a big help around here."
I was now comfy enough to prepare a jokey question about whether she'd tell that to the temp agency, although that could also be a serious question.
But my comfort level and all questions were erased from my brain when she came up and pecked me on the lips. For good measure, she hugged me just as gently as well.
It took me five seconds to realize I still had a pulse, and at that point she finally pulled away a bit, yet still had her arms slightly around me.
Even then I couldn't form a coherent reaction, and it was quite obvious she was studying me to see what my reaction would be.
All I could do was stare into her eyes again, which triggered the events of the last incident in the trailer. But this time, instead of seeing tears around her eyes, I got to take in their beauty without any distraction.
After a second or two, I actually felt myself smile as a result, without even thinking it. That made her smile as well, which gave me another beautiful sight to admire.
Yet I was caught by surprise again when she kissed me a second time, letting it linger for an additional second. So that left me back to square one with no idea how to react, and I still couldn't activate my vocal cords one way or the other. But Jenna did when she softly said "You can kiss back, you know."
I didn't know what she was thinking or doing and a growing part of me was telling me not to care. Yet it hadn't grown big enough -- believe it or not -- for me not to nitpick a little bit. "If....if you're doing this because you're pent up or taking pity on me, I....."
I wasn't sure if I could refuse even if she admitted she was, now that it was starting to sink in what was happening. But somehow, I actually wanted to give her the chance to get off the hook, despite how she was the one setting me on it.
"I'm your first crush," Jenna semi-whispered. At that point, I certainly wasn't going to ruin the mood by correcting her and saying she was my first celebrity crush. "I think you've earned the chance for it to pay off. And I need this too....and you still have to do what we say for one more day."
That made me wonder if this sounded more like extortion or blackmail, but nothing in her eyes suggested that; and I made sure to check. "I just want to be sure...." I had to go on. "You don't have to do something you'd regret," I kept going like a babbling idiot as the part of me that wanted to get on with this was getting louder.
"I don't think you'd be that bad.....would you?" she asked in a tone that was teasing, playful, and just like Pam's tone when she collaborated with Jim on a Dwight prank. But in this context, it was far sexier than anything even Jim must have imagined, and that was probably saying something.
I let just one more concern delay this, as I made sure that the door was closed and the shades were down, although it would take an effort for anyone to peek in through the high windows. We would have our privacy, but it was probably up to us to keep the noise down.
But there was nothing that noisy about kissing, which Jenna was back to doing with me. And this time, I took her advice and started to kiss back as well.
That's when it finally sunk in that I was kissing and about to do more with Jenna Fischer. I had fantasies for how that might have gone in the past, yet the specifics of how I went about it weren't coming to mind.
Not much was coming to mind at the moment, especially once she hugged me again and pressed her body against mine. Now I just wanted to touch her no matter how I did it in my fantasies, so I figured that was a good place to start.
But if I was really doing this, I had to do it right and fully savor it. I put my arms to work at last and placed a hand on the small of her back. Once our lips broke, I put the other hand on her face and almost caught my breath at how soft it was.
Jenna just smiled/smirked as I fully cupped her cheek and kissed her again, eventually opening my mouth to give her tongue an invitation in.
As her breath and tongue started to flood my mouth, I slid my lower hand up her back and the upper one down her cheek into her hair. Once my hands met, they tentatively went to her shoulders, where my fingers started to dip under the top of her shirt.
Since I was starting to feel emboldened and Jenna wasn't pushing away yet, I figured she wouldn't mind if I started to unbutton said shirt. I knew that Jenna wasn't needed on the set for about 35 minutes, so I decided I should move a little faster anyway.
Yet once I finished unbuttoning, I realized I should be willing to reciprocate, so I broke from her and started to unbutton my shirt as well. I resisted the temptation to peek onto her open shirt and what lay beneath it until I was close to baring my chest as well.
Maybe that wasn't the wisest risk to take, since I didn't have a six pack and now I had to worry if I was attractive enough to satisfy her. Even if she wanted to have sex with someone, she shouldn't have had to settle for someone she didn't find a little enticing.
That was a very corny thought, but if she was willing to kiss me and fulfill my fantasies, the least I could do is live up to hers as well.
It was with that concern that I finally shed my shirt with some final nerves. Yet as she had throughout these last several minutes, Jenna set those nerves back with a sweet, satisfied smile of approval. As an added bonus, she got her shirt completely off as well, leaving her top half only clad in a purple bra that showed an ample amount of cleavage.
Despite how Pam Beesley stayed buttoned up on the show, it remained hard to hide how well endowed Jenna Fischer was. I had heard the rumors that her chest would be shown off even more in theaters on "Blades of Glory" but I was getting an even greater show right here, and in 3D.
Yet while her C-cups were the main attraction, I had time to take in the bare curves she had below it, and how they went down to her still covered, but obviously just as shapely bottom.
But I could only focus on one set of body parts at a time, so I chose to focus on her tits for now.
I took the lead this time by pulling her to me and placing my lips and face onto her upper chest, although I didn't go to her boobs quite yet. She began to moan as my lips dipped lower, and especially when my hands started to head towards her skirt.
I realized I should have probably worked on getting the bra off first, yet Jenna was ahead of me as she raced to take it off before my mouth reached her left breast. Yet I had to kiss it once while it was still trapped inside, and I did just as I heard the bra clasp come off.
Jenna wiggled her chest to get the unclasped bra to come off, right as I pulled the zipper down her skirt. But I was temporarily distracted from that when her bare, round breasts finished jiggling.
Once they settled down, I started multitasking again by putting my right hand on her left boob and using my left to get her skirt down. She worked on wiggling it all the way down herself and stepping out of it, leaving only her matching purple panties on her body.
I was distracted by her nearly naked form long enough for her to get away and head over to the nearest couch. Getting the idea, I started to get my own pants off and got them down right before I laid down on top of her.
With that, I went to work on both her tits as our bodies started to grind together; along with our still covered groins.
Jenna's hands now started to explore my body and head steadily down south. To match her, I had my hands slide down her stomach and begin to graze the top of her panties. She then did the same to my underwear and topped me by dipping a whole finger inside; landing it a hair away from my already engorged erection.
And that brought on a whole new set of concerns; such as how long it would stay engorged once she touched it.
While I wasn't a virgin and had already survived my "first time" premature eruption, the sensation of having this woman touch it could easily bring a repeat performance. So for once, I thought on my feet and tried to buy a little time by sliding my finger down her panties first.
Jenna took a deep breath once my finger brushed past the area inside her panties, and I did as well once I got a good feel. But I concluded that focusing on pleasuring her down below would help stabilize me once she got to work down there.