Twisted Nails of Faith Ch. 02

"Can you signal Ville I'll talk to him after the show? No matter what? I don't want him to get upset and spoil the show."

"See just like I said, a very sweet girl, off course dear, it will be about half an hour till they finish." he answered with a smile.

The mixed up girl went to Ville's dressing room and made herself comfy on the couch. What am I going to do? I don't want a boyfriend, I'm not ready for this, and like how realistic is this? I'm just a girl and he's a rock god. Tomorrow they have a gig in London, 2 days after that they play in Helsinki. So what is Ville thinking? Does he do this at every gig? Pick some girl for the night? No I don't think so, he's not like that. Is he?

She keeps talking to herself in her head but it doesn't help. Why shouldn't I just enjoy this evening and that's that? Be like my exgirlfriend, pay her back cause it will be in all the magazines. For every reason I have to stay, I have a reason to leave too...

She hears someone fiddling with the door. She got up and got behind the door.

Ville entered. He didn't feel like being with the boys. Seppo said Silke would be backstage when the show was done but he couldn't find her. Why did I do something so stupid? I just wanted to help her. It wasn't meant to embarrass her. I just want to see her happy, with that beautiful smile. I want to keep her safe but that's never gonna happen now. He kicked against a garbage can.

Silke watched him, he looked so desperate, and why did I have this effect on him... So I'm not just some girl to him. He really likes me. She wanted to hug him.

She jumped when he hit the garbage can.

"HEY watch it!!!" she screamed.

He jumped too and looked at her.

"I thought you left" he whispered.

"I told Seppo I would talk to you no matter what. He said you weren't using your dressing room so I could use it to think things trough. So what are you doing here besides trashing the place?" She answered a bit distant.

"I'm trying to get you out of my system. The boys think I'm crazy, who gets a crush on a lesbian? And then tries to find her a girlfriend on stage? You have to be Ville Valo to pull something like that off..." he said very sad.

She couldn't keep her eyes off him, he was looking so lost. She wanted to wrap her arms around him like he did with her but she was afraid. She didn't want to get hurt. Damn my ex girlfriend messed me up pretty good. How could I say no to this beautiful guy? He's gorgeous on the outside, but divine on the inside.

"Ville?" she whispered.

He looked up and saw the tears in her eyes. She looked about as lost as he felt. He said nothing, he couldn't, was scared to say something stupid and loose her completely. She looked in his eyes and drowned in them. She always thought he had beautiful eyes, who would have thought she would be looking into them from so close.

"Ville" she whispered again "I have to tell you something, don't be mad, and don't jump to any conclusions ok?"

Ville looked confused but said "ok, let's sit down shall we?"

So they got on the couch. The girl was actually happy she sat down cause her legs felt like jelly, and being so close to Ville didn't help. He smelled so sweet. Although it probably was just his sweat she was smelling. She wanted to touch him.

They sat there for a while, just looking at each other. Damn he looks hot she thought, how would he feel? How would he taste? No stop it, you can't think like that, she said to herself.

Ville thought the same things but he was convinced he didn't have a chance. Although he could have swore she was checking him out. He was afraid to break the silence but some one had to.

So he whispered: "You wanted to tell me something kulta?"

"Yeah.. Euhm... It's like this... Euhm... Before I didn't have the chance and euhm like..." she stuttered.

"Kulta it's me you're talking to, breath in and just say what you want to say, it can't be that bad since you're still here." he said caring.

How could I not fall in love with this sweet guy???

"Ok here it goes, please don't be mad."

He looked at her in disbelief "How could I be mad at you angel?"

"Well before we were talking about my exgirlfriend, you thought I was gay and then Seppo interrupted us, right?"

"Yeah right what about it?" his heart jumped. Is she going to say what I think she's going to say?

Ow god his eyes twinkled, so cute, ok concentrate she said to herself, you have to tell him that nothing can happen.

"Well I'm not... not really anyway, I like guys too." she looked at her hands, scared of his reaction. She saw his hand taking hers and kissing it.

"Kulta that is the best thing you could have said to me tonight, why would I be mad at you for that? Like you said you didn't have the chance to explain more when we met." he said with the biggest and cutest smile.

"Don't be too happy." she replied "This doesn't mean we can get together, I'm really not ready for anything that involves feelings and trusting and stuff like that." she said with a sadness that went straight to his heart.

"She messed you up pretty bad huh kulta? I'm just glad to be here with you and what happens, happens, but nothing has to happen... Although I'm dying to give you a hug right about now." he said with his voice that sounded so soft and sweet. He opened his arms and she crawled close to him. They both thought how good this felt.

They sat like that for don't know how long. Each with their own thoughts. Ville thought how this felt so right, she smelled so sweet, I could sit like this forever. Just the two of them, I want to kiss her, but don't want to spoil the moment.

Silke thought how could I feel so safe in his arms? I don't know him, probably won't ever see him again. I want to feel his lips, but I know I will be lost then, so I would probably turn away if he tried to kiss me... And I don't want this to end.

There was a knock on the door and Burton came in: "Ville you ok?" he asked.

They both jumped to their feet, as if they were doing something wrong.

Burton smilingly said "Oh guess you are more than ok huh? Well I had to tell you to get in the shower now or we'll be late going to the hotel."

Ville said a bit shy "Yeah I'm fine, is it that late already? Guess I lost track of time, if you can keep Silke company I'll jump in the shower."

Burton looked at Silke and said "Sure I'll take care of this cutie, I'll introduce her to the rest come on Silke lets go, unless you wanna see Skinny here naked, oh no forgot you're gay."

Ville and Silke looked at each other and smiled.

Burton looked confused "What?!? What did I miss?!?"

Silke said "Nothing" grabbed Burtons arm and walked out to the other dressing room. They almost bumped into Seppo.

"And did you work it out sweetie?" He asked.

"Yes Seppo thanks." and she gave him a quick kiss.

Seppo walked into Ville's dressing room while Burton asked Silke what was going on.

She answered frankly "None of your business B, it's between Seppo, Ville and me, if they wanna talk about our hot threesome, it's their business but I don't kiss and tell."

She had to make an effort to stay serious. Burton stopped, looked at her and wondered if she was serious. She couldn't hold it anymore and started laughing.

"Oh B, you should have seen your face!"

Burton picked her up, threw her over his shoulder and took her to the dressing room.

She yelled while still laughing "let me go!!!"

"Oh no you're gonna pay for joking around!" he said with an evil smile.

"Guys would you open the door please I have my hands full with a new toy!" Burton yelled.

Linde opened up and saw Silke on Burtons shoulder and laughed "How did you get Ville to leave her alone with you B?"

"He asked me to keep her company while he took a shower and I said I would introduce her to you guys..." he answered innocently.

He turned around so Silke could see the boys and said: "Silke this is Linde, Migé and Gas. Guys this is Silke a very, very naughty girl!"

"Guys help me, tell B to put me down please?" she begged.

The guys just laughed "You probably deserve that, so you got yourself in this mess, you get yourself out of it."

"Ow come on, you saw what Ville did to me on stage, a bit of sympathy is in order here I think?" she said with her sweetest voice.

"Oh how could I resist that?" Gas said "Come on Burton give her to me."

"No." Linde said "Give her to me pretty please Janne?"

Migé looked at the guys and girl and said deadly serious: "For a gay girl you sure can make guys go crazy girl!"

Everybody looked at Migé, and then started laughing really loud. Burton couldn't hold Silke anymore and put her down on the couch. When everybody settled down after a few minutes Burton said "You're gonna fit right in with us."

Silke looked confused at Burton, as did the boys.

Burton continued: "Yeah she can say whatever she wants but I saw something between her and Skinny, so I'm guessing she's staying for a while."

The boys looked at Silke with question marks in their eyes.

Migé spoke first: "See I told you guys, Ville could make her straight again."

Gas answered "No that's not possible, not even Ville could do that... And btw she was really mad at him when she left the stage."

Linde just kept starring...

Silke sighed, why did they have to be this curious? Did it matter what sexe I love? She just sat back and kept the boys guessing.

At this time Seppo and Ville entered. Seppo asked what all the fuss was about. Silke just gazed at Ville, he had a black suit on with a dark red shirt and looked drop dead gorgeous.

The boys answered they were just asking what was going on between Silke and Ville.

Seppo said stern "Nothing is going on, and even if there was, it's Ville's and Silke's choice to let you guys know. So quit it and get on the bus!"

The boys muttered but got on the bus. Ville waited till the boys passed and took Silkes hand and squeezed it "You ok kulta? Sorry bout the boys, it's just cause they love me you know?" he asked softly.

She gave him a big smile: "The guys are great, just teasing them, Skinny."

"What they told you my secret nickname? That's so unfair, well I'll have to think off one for you." he said happy.

"I don't see anything wrong with kulta." she said as she pulled him on the bus.

There she saw her friends, she was speechless, "How? What? When?" she stuttered.

Seppo answered: "You asked me remember?"

"Yeah but I totally forgot about it, thanks Seppo, you are a life saver."

Everybody made themselves comfy, the boys in the back of the bus, Silke with her friends occupied the front. Everyone asked what happened. So Silke and Ville both started telling, each on their own.

Rick, Silke's best friend, watched her closely. It's been a while since he saw her this relaxed, this happy. Although something did seem to bother her.

The boys reacted almost the same to the story. Migé asked: "So you could have every mans dream?!? A threesome with 2 girls? COOL!"

Ville punched Migé: "I don't want two girls, I would be happy with just her, and I can't have anything, she doesn't want me, she likes being single, she just doesn't feel the same." The leadsinger sighed.

Linde looked at Ville, I've never seen him like this, he really loves this girl, and still he's accepting she doesn't want a relationship? Crazy!

"Ville, are you crazy?" Linde asked.

"Huh? What Linde?"

"She does like you, a LOT and I think she does want you, but she's just afraid, that girl messed with her head, and you are this rock star who's leaving town tomorrow. What would you do if you were her?"

Ville looked at Linde: "Are you serious?"

"Didn't you see how she reacted when you came in? She couldn't keep her eyes of you and went all quiet, so I would just take it easy." Linde replied.

"WHAT!?!" Ville yelled.

Silke turned around, what was going on back there???

Rick watched how Silke reacted to Ville's voice.

"Hey girl, don't let that bitch play with your head, follow your heart and go to Ville." he said.

Silke looked at him and said with a sad voice "And do what? Loose myself? Been there done that, that's how I got this fucked up, he's leaving tomorrow."

Rick responded "Go talk to him, take a risk, maybe it doesn't have to end here. You have been throwing yourself at work, so you have a lot of vacation left... Take it now and live a little. He makes you smile. We tried to get that smile back, but no-one could, but he and those boys can. That's gotta mean something?"

Maybe Rick is right, I do have all this holiday and it's fun being around the guys. She got up and walked to the boys.

Ville watched her coming over, did she hear what he said? What if she heard it, it was the truth, he didn't want to take it easy, he was leaving tomorrow but he didn't have a choice, he didn't want to hurt her.

Silke asked the boys if they could sign some stuff for her friends. So they moved to the front of the bus, when Ville wanted to pass her, she stopped him.

"Can we talk?" she whispered.

He took her hand and directed her to his bedroom. They just stood there, holding hands, looking at their hands, both not knowing how to start, what to say, what the other wanted. Silke felt her legs becoming weak, so she asked if she could sit down.

"Off course" Ville said and let go of her hand and she sat down on the bed. Ville just stood there, Ozzy she looked beautiful with her runny make-up, her hair a mess, but she didn't care.

Why didn't he sit down with her? Didn't he want to be close to her? He drove her crazy but a good crazy, butterfly crazy. "Ville? Why don't you sit down too? There's plenty of room and I promise I won't bite." she joked to try and cut the tension.

He looked at her and all he wanted to do was to take her in his arms and make love to her. So he sat down at her feet, he just couldn't sit next to her...

She looked down at him, oh no those puppy eyes. How could anyone resist them? She knew she had to start talking, she knew how he felt, she was the problem.

"I'm scared Ville" she whispered, "I'm scared to trust anyone, to love anyone, to loose you..."

An ear deafening silence

What did she just say, loose me? Did he hear that right? He wasn't sure, she said it so quietly...

Why didn't he say anything, did he change his mind? Was she imagining things? Was she too much trouble? She was dying and so was he...

"Loosing me?" he whispered and looked up at her.

"Yeah like you're leaving tomorrow?"

"Can't you come with me? It's Sunday tomorrow so you don't have to work? Lets have one more day together?" he said without thinking.

"Do you mean that? Would you want me to come with you?" She said with a smile.

"Kulta if I had my way, you would stay with me forever... It's up to you, I can understand if you can't, if you won't... We are strangers.... But I know what I'm feeling and I want to give this a chance. I know I have to take it easy but with so little time it's hard, I really don't want to loose you and I don't know what I can do to have you stay." he said desperate.

She wanted to kiss him so bad for those words, she smiled and said: "Well you don't have to do anything special, just be your sweet little self!"

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" he said as he jumped to his feet.

"Yes Skinny I am" she smiled.

He was so happy that he took her face between his hands and kissed her ever so sweet on her lips.

When he realized what he was doing he let go and said scared "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, sorry kulta, I'm just happy!"

He was so cute when he was sorry. So she took his face between her hands and kissed him back. "And I'm not sorry, I'm happy too" she whispered.

He took her in his arms and they just stood there, enjoying being so close to each other and thinking about nothing else. Then the bus stopped and they fell on the bed. At this time Burton knocked and came in.

"Hey guys we're at the ho.... ow excuse me." He turned around and went back in front of the bus. Ville and Silke looked at each other and started laughing, releasing all the stress of the past hours.

"Ok I think we don't have to tell the guys." Ville said smiling.

Silke answered very serious "Tell them what?"

Ville looked at her scared with question marks in his eyes, but she kissed him again and both of them totally got lost in the kiss.

There was a knock on the door "Ville your room is ready and I got a room for Silke too" Seppo said without barging in like Burton did.

"Yeah we'll be right there Seppo" Ville answered. He looked at Silke, how was he going to say goodbye tomorrow? Silke doubted to ask if she could stay longer, maybe later. They got up and went to the hotel, there were still some fans waiting, Ville looked at Silke. She smiled and whispered "Take your time, I'm going to take a shower and my friends are here too so don't worry about me" and she went inside.

What did he do to deserve her? She's so sweet and understanding, seems like she's done this her whole life he thought

The fans were so happy, because Ville was smiling all the time.

Silke entered her room and only Rick was there: "The others left, they had to get home and didn't want to intrude too much. I just wanted to see if you were ok, but from what I heard from Burton, you're more than ok..." he said with a playful smile.

"Yeah I'm ok, don't know what's next but I feel good. Ville's a sweetie" she answered calmly.

"And how long will you stay away?"

"I don't know, Ville just asked me to stay till tomorrow. I'll see how it goes..."

Ville came in and said excited "What? You can stay longer? Please stay, for as long as you want!"

Rick said his goodbyes cause he thought they needed some privacy and left.

"First, were you eavesdropping? Second how did you get in and third are you sure?" Silke asked.

"Can't you be snappy?" he smiled "I came to ask if you needed some clean clothes, our rooms are joined and I've already told you, I wanted you with me forever."

"Have I told you how sweet you are?"

"No not really." he said coyly.

"Ville!!! Stop it!!!"

"What I didn't do anything?" he replied trying to look innocent. Silke threw a pillow at him but missed. "Ow do you wanna play, fine by me" and Ville walked over to Silke. Silke tried to get away and ran in Ville's room throwing the door closed. Ville screams "AUCH my nose! Damned Silke get some ice will you?!?"

She was scared that she really hurt Ville and ran to get some ice. When she got back, Ville's in the bathroom with his head above the sink and the water running.

Silke asked quietly "Ville you ok?"

WOESH!

She gets a shower cap filled with water over her.

"Ville!!!" She screamed.

At this time the boys entered and started to ask what was going on with all the screaming. They saw Silke and started laughing. Silke went over to Burton with her hands behind her back and dumped all the ice cubes in his shirt.

"Hey that's cold!" Burton yelled.

"Well you had something coming from before." Silke laughed "and now everybody out I wanna take a shower! Oh guys can I borrow some clean clothes from somebody till tomorrow?"

Burton answered "Are you gonna need clothes tonight?"

"Burton keep your mouth" Ville said indignantly "Silke's a lady. So... But kulta you can borrow some of mine."

"Skinny, did you even look at me at all??? A shirt might fit, but I don't even wanna try to get in your pants."

Ville tried to look disappointed.

"Ok fatty." Burton said "I'll get a pair of pants for you, any preferences?"

"Yeah fatty N° 2, just some trainers are ok." she replied.

And Ville and the boys laughed at Burtons face.

"Ok everybody out so Silke can have her shower, Burton I'll come and get those pants" Ville said pushing them out of the bathroom. "Oh Skinny" Silke asked sweetly "Can I have your key please?"