UCAC Ch. 01

"Yeah!" I laughed, leaping down the stairs. I ran towards the inner gate, the door being incredibly slow, "Come on, come on!"

The door opened, allowing me to continue down the hall. I entered the headquarters, making my way down to the cafeteria. There, my boys sat eating. I rushed over to them.

"Took you long enough..." Marcell laughed. You'd never expect Tinnu to look this way.

He was about five foot ten, with rich southern italian skin. His hair was dark brown and mildly curly. He had two big brown eyes, a thin nose and juicy cheek bones. His teeth were perfect, so perfect.

"Yeah, dude. Where do you always run off to?" Milan said. He was Marcell's little big brother...Saker. He pretty much was identical to Marcell, just stretched out on a six foot four frame.

"Have you two seen Liam?" I asked.

"No he ran off after you! Don't tell me he hasn't come back yet..." Marcell said, growing worried.

"DENVER!!" A superior shouted.

"Aw shit..." I sighed. I got to my feet, heading out of the dining hall. I knew this had to be related to Liam.

It was Captain Wallace, Lead Wing. He stood in the hall, not looking very pleased. He led me to his office, closing the door behind him.

"I told you not to get caught..." Captain said.

"I was silent. Liam messed up everything...in fact where is the twerp?" I asked.

"He's in his barracks...I sent him there. What did you say to him?" Captain asked, seeming disappointed in me.

"I told him how I really feel...how everyone feels." I sighed.

"God, Denver what the hell is wrong with you? That is a fucking kid who you probably just scarred for the rest of his military career!" He scolded.

"He followed me... I'm sorry I lost my temper." I sighed, clenching my head, "I should apologize..."

"Yeah you should... You're not the only one with secrets, Denver." Captain smiled. It caught me off guard.

"Wait, what does that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"Liam is gay too." Captain said, "And..."

"Oh my god...eeew." I squirmed.

"Boy..."

"I'm sorry, but he's so shrimply and...EEEEW..." I cringed.

"God, you're terrible..." Captain said, astounded.

"Why'd you even tell me that? Oh god, please tell me you didn't tell him..." I asked.

"No. I'm just saying look out for the kid because there are some not so nice people here who'll waste no time in hurting him..." Captain said. His tone made it clear that this was an order.

"Will do." I sighed.

"I know you're still in the closet, that this will be difficult for you but since you know the struggle...guide him through it." Captain said, obviously having very little faith in me.

"And what if he makes a move on me?" I asked, truly fearing it.

"Whatever you do... don't..."

"Oh god no!" I squealed.

"Hmmmph..." Captain said, arms folded.

"What, you don't believe me?" I asked.

"Just be considerate of the fact that he comes from a place of rules, doctrines and key principles... It will be hard for him to adjust to this freer more spontaneous lifestyle, especially within what is supposed to be a military group." Captain responded.

"So what's going on with the Marine Core?" I asked.

"I'm not at liberty to say...But I can say," Captain said guiding me to the door, "That I let them know how we all feel..."

"Well," I said leaving, "Thank you!"

"You did good today soldier now go make peace with that boy..." Captain said.

"Al..." I began, only to have Captain slam the door in my face. I laughed, heading down to the barracks. It was fairly crowded in this stretch but we Long Wingers had our own area.

I walked up the stairs, entering the long winger stretch. There Liam sat on his bed, reading a book. He looked up at me then back down to his book. I sat on the bed parallel to his. The boy paid me no mind.

"You know," I began, "It's been quite frustrating having to do these missions... seem like their built to take us out. I'm sorry I took it out on ya..." He closed his book, looking at me, glaring.

"Don't act like it wasn't the truth. I see how everyone looks at me when I just show up. I know you all think I'm an aggravating idiot. I know none of you like me..." Liam sighed. It was jarring to hear him speak of himself this way.

"Well I don't want to like to you, now. No one here likes you and truth be told, everyone thinks you're annoying and that you're a hazard." I said plainly.

"A hazard? You and Milan are the biggest hazards of us all!" He said defensively.

"Eh, one thing you must know is that our cybernetic infrastructure is programmed to portray traits of the raptor it is based on. Merlins are very boisterous and so are saker falcons. It's simply the way we're wired." I explained.

"Really?" He asked surprised.

"Yeah..."

"I never would have known. It's so disorganized." Liam sighed.

"Ever since doctor Aheem died, this place has been falling apart at the seams. You just gotta bear with it." I said.

"When did he die?" Liam asked.

"It's been about fifteen years." I said.

"Really? And they haven't found anyone to replace him?" Liam asked, startled.

"Nope. When he died, the Cybernetic Human project was lost. Apart from the information that could be salvaged, everything was lost. His biggest project was the Land Core...cybernetic humans that could be mobilized on land, however...he was assassinated before the ideas could be finalized. I think he knew he was going to die. They say he became very paranoid with the creation of the Land Core." I continued.

"How'd he die?"

"He was so paranoid, he moved way across the world to a strange land known as Patagonia. Our main enemy faction, the Revivalists are said to have done him in but Patagonia is so remote...I'm not quite sure of that. I think that man wanted to die." I sighed.

"Wait, why would he want to die?" Liam asked.

"His entire life's work was being weaponized and he bared the weight of the world on his shoulders. He had been working for over thirty years prior to his death and...maybe it drove him mad. I'm not sure..." I said.

"So no one knows what really happened to him?"

"Yeah, by the time they recovered his body, he had decomposed considerably."

"Wow..."

"Yeah, some stuff I learned how to just not question and to simply coexist with. I can promise you if you start doing this, your experience here will be much better. When I was your age, I had no one to tell me that. You've been here for a good while now and I think it's time you heed to this." I advised.

"Thanks, will heed to this." He said, opening his book again.

"Sorry about earlier..." I said, truly feeling guilty.

"You already apologized..." He said, obviously growing tired of me.

"Come on, let's get some food. All that flying today, I know you're hungry as hell." I asked.

"I can't leave...I've been ordered to stay here for the rest of the night..." He sighed.

"Well let me bring you up some food..." I smiled.

"Why are you being so nice to me? I mean you made it clear that you don't like me..." Liam asked.

"No," I said, preparing to clarify, "I was angry and said some things I shouldn't. I've only been extremely annoyed by you and nothing more. What happened earlier was no exception. There is only one person here I know well enough not to like and that is Jarvis... You may think you're not liked but Jarvis is truly the epitome of universal disgrace. You're still very young and have a lot to learn. Jarvis...he's a bit of a lost cause at this point."

"I remember when I said hi to him. He just walked past me as though he didn't hear it...so I said hi again. He turned and ask me was I talking to him. I said yeah and he said oh and kept walking. I was like wow..." Liam reflected.

"Yeah. He has already attempting to befriend Everette after the stunt he pulled today." I said.

"Oh my god, Everette is awesome!" Liam said, obviously having quite a crush on him.

"You like him?" I asked.

"Yeah, he's an awesome Winger!" Liam said.

"No, I mean you must like him." I prodded.

"No...I don't like men. That's gross." Liam refuted.

"You're lying to me." I said. Liam sighed.

"Ok...ever since he showed up, I just wanted him!" Liam confessed.

"You two are the same age...I see why not." I said teasingly, "You better pounce before Jarvis brainwashes him."

"God, I'd never. I'm too frightened to try anyone. I have a question though..."

"What?" I responded.

"Why do you seem to have a fixation on the Forest Wingers?" He asked. I sighed, getting ready to tell him a long story.

"I am... what you call a slut. I have slept around with every in the closet person in this base. I have slept around with the Finnish locals. I have flown hundreds of miles simply to sleep with people. It was all fun but I had this gem waiting on me for the past seven years and today was the first time we've seen each other in months. Today though, things just went differently and I don't think things can be the same. That is why I'm so fascinated with Forest Wingers." I said.

"That Levant Winger?" Liam asked.

"Yeah..." I sighed.

"Who is he?"

"His name is Raul Sion. He's the only person I ever think I can love." I said, truly flustered at the thought of him.

"Well, what if he doesn't feel the same way?" Liam asked innocently.

"I don't know what I'd do." I sighed, truly and hopelessly in love.

Raul was the only person who dared to get to know this misfit. Of course I was dumb and stupid, too blind to see how great a gift he was. He'd always know what to say to make my shitty day special and I'd always know what to say to fuck up his day. My dumb ass would often ramble on about all the dudes I slept with, like Raul took interest. He only was interested in me. Seven long years passed by and I feared the utmost worst... His feelings for me may have dwindled when mine for him were at their most high.

In this world of perils, where nothing was finite and everything changed, having some form of consistency would be great. Raul wanted to be that rock and I truly would do anything to get him to be. I just wanted to know would Raul still be there.

"So do you want me to bring you something to eat or not?" I asked.

"No..." Liam sighed.

"Fine, suit yourself...later." I sighed, heading towards the stairs.

"Later..." He said faintly, obviously diving back into his book.

I headed back to the dining hall. Marcell and Milan sat, conversing happily to themselves. A few tables over from them, Jarvis and Everette were talking. I just wondered what Jarvis was saying to him... Whatever it was, he had the boy laughing which terrified me even more.

"That is some strange shit..." I said, sitting next to Milan.

"What?" Marcell asked.

"The fact that Jarvis is all over Everette...that leach." I joked.

"I shall refrain from commenting..." Marcell laughed.

"I just know Jarvis pissed me the fuck off with all that swooping. He'll do anything to show off some speed." Milan sighed.

"I thought it was funny. He thinks showing his physical prowess is what makes him a great leader... He should be lucky he's second in command." I sighed.

"Yeah, I think you should be second in command." Marcell suggested.

"Hell no..."

"Why?" Marcell asked.

"Because, I'm not much of a leader. I don't have the patience." I sighed.

"Shitting me... You are a creative ass flyer and you often take sacrifices for the rest of us with your little ass. I don't see how you do that shit..." Milan laughed.

"When I think back on it, sometimes I don't see how either." I sighed.

"Where's Liam?" Marcell asked.

"He's in his room... had a long day. I went to talk to him...gave him some advice." I chuckled.

"Wow...you've grown... Advice?" Marcell asked, shocked.

"About what?" Milan asked.

"It's in high confidence..."

"The mission in Italy seemed to have pulled a number on you..." Marcell teased.

"Man, I've never did something so challenging in my entire life. I'm so glad to be back on home soil though." I said thinking back to that dreadful suicide mission that took place in Venice.

"I just still fail to see why the Marine Core didn't get involved until we fucking almost died trying to salvage the mission..." Milan sighed.

"I got a good feeling this is what cap's discussion with the general was about." I inferred.

"Most likely. When intel reviewed out footage, they were surprised to see the turn of events and weren't too pleased with Liam. But I told them to go easy on him since this is his first year. However, with Everette's great performance out there, Liam has some big shoes to fill." Marcell added.

"He'll eventually get it. We just got to to get him to think more on the wing." I sighed.

"We?" Milan asked.

"Yes we! He's a teammate and we should put all differences aside." I said.

"See, leader..." Marcell teased.

"Eh...I'm serious." I said.

"You're right. I'll try with the kid tomorrow..." Milan sighed.

"You're going to the tournament tomorrow?" Marcell asked.

"Oh shit I forgot about it..." I said.

"Well the forest wingers just entered it. It's only three of them...I'm not sure how they'll do." Milan responded.

As he said that, Raul, Leo and the humungous dude from earlier entered the mess hall. They look exhausted but accomplished. They got their food, sitting at a table near the door. Succumbing to my impulses I got up, walking over to them. Their conversation fell silent as they all stared at me. Not even a single hello from them...

"Hey..." I said, truly hoping for the best.

"...Hey..." Raul said back, after a long delay.

"Ya'll did great out there... I envy your gear!" I smiled.

"I mean, it was a private training event that you didn't have clearance to witness." Raul said. It was a blow to my stomach, it was. We always used to watch each other train. Something was definitely different between us.

"Well, sorry." I sighed, not really knowing how to respond.

"Yeah..."

"Can we, talk for a minute?" I asked. Raul sighed, getting to his feet.

"Sure..." He said. The huge dude, Ghost- I didn't know his real name yet- eyed me as though I was villainous. I truly feared the worst at this point. Still though, I had to be optimistic some how. After all, Raul was the only person who truly knew me. Surely he wouldn't walk away from me...right?

"What do you want?" He asked, arms folded, eyes glaring.

"Whoa, why this?" I asked, not expecting him to be so defensive.

"Let's not act like you don't know why." Raul said, harboring some serious hurt.

"Yeah let's face it. I'm the biggest idiot here..." I sighed. Raul simply stared at me.

"Why do you want to talk?" He asked.

"I missed you..." I smiled.

"All bullshit... You probably slept with all of Italy while you were on that mission..." He said, not believing me at all.

"No, I can guarantee you I did not! You don't understand! That mission was hell...the most grueling bloodiest thing I've ever done. All I could think about was getting back home, I...It made me realize that life is so finite and it's much better to spend it with someone you care about..." I said. Still, Raul looked on unfazed.

"Oh so you come back after six months, a changed man huh?" He asked, the skepticism ringing through his voice.

"It definitely has changed me. I was up to my neck in blood and probably will be shipped off again to another stretch of Eurasia and be forced to do it all over again. I just need something to ground and root me because without it, I'll damn near lose my mind! Just pray you won't ever have to go out into the war..." I sighed. He gave a congested eye roll, processing all I said.

"I waited seven years for you to tell me this..." He sighed.

"I'm so sorry about being so blind to it. I know I'm the dumbest, biggest idiot..."

"But I've moved on..." He interrupted, stopping me in my tracks.

"You've... moved...on?" I asked.

"I only could have waited so long, go through so much heartache, lay so much on the line for you and you just step past it and sleep around with everyone I know. I hoped that one day you'd come to your senses but now... I don't fucking want to deal with you. I just can't come to trusting you, will never be able to do so." He said, walking back towards the mess hall.

"Come on, don't do this to me..." I begged. He stopped.

"But what about all you've done to me?" He said with no forgiveness in his voice. And he was very justified. I really treated him like shit over these seven years and this, this is what I deserved. I was left clenching my head, watching Raul walk back into the mess hall. It was not just mere walking. Raul was walking out of my life for forever and there was nothing I could do, only watch.

I wanted to fight for him, fight as hard as I could but I was still in the closet. Not to mention, I didn't have the most reputable name. I've hurt a lot of people and Raul was just the person I never intended to hurt. If I could just run after him and drop down to my knees and beg, I would but I was still very deep in the closet! After what these grunts have done to other gays in this joint, I didn't want to risk it.

It was such a helpless feeling. It probably was just how Raul felt over the past seven years. I really didn't know what to do. It felt like a huge cavity was being carved in my chest. I hadn't felt like this since I was a kid, since I watched both of my parents die. I had no one else left in this treacherous world, no one! I was alone again...