Unforgettable Fire Pt. 02: 10 Years Ago

"I will, baby, but you need to come first. Come on my fingers."

The way he kept rubbing my clit mercilessly, coming was all I could do.

I turned my head to the front of the car again and put a hand on each seat for support as my hips continued their circling.

There was no rhythm to my movements anymore. As the pleasure from Finn's fingers on me commanded every action of my body, I just moved blindly, feeling the hairs on his thighs brushing deliciously at the smooth skin of my ass.

The wet sound of his hand on me, his breath on my ear, his other hand grabbing my breasts like his life depended on it...I lost it.

I screamed and finally Finn let his fingers go inside me as my orgasm came down like a crashing wave hitting me.

My walls gripped his fingers tight. All the muscles inside me pulsed as well as the ones on the insides of my thighs.

Before I had time to recuperate, Finn removed his fingers from inside me, put his hands on my buttocks and lifted me up.

I had to use all of my strength not to come again when he brushed the tip of his cock on my entrance.

He positioned himself and brought me down on him at once.

My eyes went black. I knew my mouth was open to its limit because I felt a pinch of pain on my jaw, but my ears heard no sound, except for the one that came from Finn.

"Ohh. Fuuuck."

For a beat we both just stood still, adjusting to the feeling of him being inside me.

Then I began to move my hips and Finn thrust up going full into me.

I gasped and his arms came from behind me, grabbing my shoulders and forcing me further down into him. I moved my hips up and down in small disconnected circles over him.

My legs were spread open, my knees touched the outside of his thighs. My body was bent forward, in a 45 degree angle. As he pushed inside me, I pushed my body down on him, meeting each one of his thrusts, with my sweaty palms on the leather back of the two seats in front of me.

Finn leaned back on the seat behind me and the shift in movement brought his hips up in his cock went deeper inside me.

One of his hands slipped down from my shoulder until it found my clit.

The sensation was magical and it sent spasms of pleasure up my spine that went up and down again to settle on the building tension in between my legs.

I arched my back, moaning and screaming his name.

"Ahh! Finland!"

Craving for even more contact, my hips moved faster and I was almost jumping on him, my tits bouncing up and down.

I was going to come soon.

Inside I felt my muscles tightening and clenching, the tension there building up with every single one of his movements.

Finn sit up straight, then, and pulled my back to him. I threw my head back on his shoulder, his lips were grazing my neck.

We started moving slowly in synchrony. I reached behind me and put a hand to the back of his neck. My other hand went down to my pussy where it joined his, working on my clit.

Our movements got faster, the sound of flesh slapping on wet flash echoed inside the car, mingled with our sounds of pleasure and ragged breaths.

Finn was thrusting up so deeply, I was going dizzy.

"Oh, Finn, I'm coming!"

"Come on, then, love. Come on my cock."

He snaked one arm around my ribs and pulled me down to him. I moaned his name, the sound lost in the air.

My head turned to the side, and I buried my nose on his hair. The other hand on his nape pulled hard at his curls as my body rocked up and down. The pleasure was an overwhelming, torturing feeling that engulfed me.

I was losing it, my walls started to quiver, gripping him tighter.

"Ahgg! Come on, love." Finn's hoarse voice urged me to let go. I could feel he wouldn't be able to hold on for much longer either.

He thrust up violently one more time and that was all I needed.

My legs trembled and my whole body convulsed while I screamed his name so loudly he put his hand over my mouth. A wave of pleasure washed over me, leaving me a shapeless mass.

Finn buried his face on the crook of my neck and he bit the skin there as I felt him leak deep inside me. He let out a sound that was more like a wild animal's roar, which was muffled on my skin.

My hips were still circling over him, even though we had already come.

"Ahhh, Lord Jesus Christ, woman!" He put his hands over my hip bone to stop me. "You'll kill me one day."

I chuckled unable to do much more. I had no air inside my lungs.

Lifting my hips I let Finn slid out of me, and then I turned so we could face each other again.

The dim light inside the car was enough for me to see the satisfied grin on his face.

I leaned in to kiss him, messy and lazily.

The car windows were fogged and I noticed belatedly, that we had been inside a car with the windows closed all of that time. No wonder I felt so sleepy.

Quickly, I leaned in to the side and rolled one window down. The cool air of the night invaded the space and we both breathed in deeply.

"God, we could have died in here!" I said with a weak voice.

Finn laughed. "Can you imagine the faces of the people who would have found us tomorrow?"

I laughed with the little strength I had left.

I kissed him again and rested my head on his shoulder.

Finn put his face on my neck and I felt his heart still beating fast through his chest. The air coming through the opened window drying the sweat on our skins.

We stayed like that, clung to each other for what seemed like forever waiting for our breaths and heartbeats to slow down.

Out of the blue, Finn chuckled and the sound shook me from my almost asleep state. I lifted my head to look at him. He ran his nose over the crook of my neck, my jaw, until he found my lips and kissed them, moaning.

"Do you think we're getting better at this?" He asked amused, brushing the hair stuck with sweat on my forehead. "Imagine what we'll be like when we're seventy."

I felt like I was made of marshmallow. Even speaking required more strength than what I had left.

"Mmhmn." Was all I managed to reply before I let my head fall to his shoulder again.

He shook me a little.

"Woman, you are not sleeping here." I heard his smile on my ear when he spoke.

I groaned and lifted my head once more.

"You broke me. Again." My voice was drowsy.

He smiled my favourite smile, the crooked teethed one.

"You know, it's a good thing you tire this easily. What is it? T

The fourth time today? If we carry on like this my cock will fall off before I'm thirty."

I felt so tired I closed my eyes again, but I still laughed at him. But before my laughter could fully subdue, it turned into a yawn. I opened my mouth and yawned long and lazily, spreading my arms, a tear falling down my face.

Finn's thumb brushed the tear away, and when I opened my eyes I noticed him smiling dumbly at me. His thumbs still brushing my cheeks in soft circles.

I arched a brow at him.

"What is it?"

Finn just shook his head slowly, still smiling.

"I just love you, that's all."

I couldn't help the stupid wide smile that split my face.

"It doesn't count when you say it after I just made you come." I said to him, repeating what he had said to me that morning.

Finn smiled, rolling his eyes at me.

"Fair enough."

I leaned in closer to him and pressed my nose to his.

"I love you too, Finny." I said, like I rarely did, and kissed his mouth again, slowly and thoroughly. I started moving my hips, rubbing myself over him and feeling him harden again.

My brain was alerting my body of how exhausted it should be, but being naked and this close to Finland had me ignoring the tiredness.

The friction was giving me goose pimples and Finn's hands clutched at my hair deepening our kiss and sucking in my moans and whimpers.

"Ah! Fuck! Just come with me." He said in our kiss, his voice husky and pleading.

I smiled on his lips.

"I intend to."

Finn broke the kiss completely and pulled his head back to look at me. He had an expression on his face I couldn't read.

"Finn, what's wrong?" I asked placing my palms flat on his chest.

He didn't answer, instead he just pulled me in for another kiss. He kissed me sweetly at first, but then it turned desperate and wild. He held me in place with one hand on my hair and another around my waist. I was consumed by him, and for a second I lost sense of where I was and what was happening. In the back of my head a little voice was telling me to stop him and make him talk. Talk, not kiss. Talk.

I turned my face to the side and broke the kiss off, pushing him back on his seat, the both of us breathing hard.

"Finland. Tell me what's happening here."

He was acting strange all of a sudden and I wanted to know why.

He put his hands on either side of my face, his eyes burrowing into mine, his expression a careful one.

"I got accepted on an internship program in America."

I gaped in surprise and then squealed, pulling him to me, and hugging him to my chest.

"Oh, my god! That's fantastic, Finn!"

His warm breath caressed my breasts when he laughed. He brought his head up to meet my eyes.

"You think so?" He asked, sounding insecure.

"Of course, I do! That's bloody brilliant!" I reassured him.

Finn's life dream was to become a heart surgeon. I couldn't be happier to hear he had gotten such a great opportunity.

He hugged me, then, burying his nose on my neck. Only then did I registered the true meaning of his happy news and what he meant when he said 'come with me.' My heart skipped a beat and I turned to stone on his arms.

I'm sure he felt me tensing up.

"Finn." The tone of my voice was enough to make him look up at me. "You're leaving." It wasn't a question.

His mysterious dark eyes turned sad when he spoke.

"I have to leave in a week."

I froze, taken aback as if I had been slapped across the face. He'd leave in a week? How the fuck was that even possible?!

I pulled back from his touch and he reached for my face again but I just pushed his hands away.

"What do you mean you're leaving in a week?" I felt my face contort in a grim of incredulity.

"I only heard back from them yesterday afternoon. I was going to tell you, but we got cau-"

I interrupted him right there.

"What?! You've known you were going to leave the country for a whole bloody day and didn't tell me about it? What the fuck, Finn!"

I spat my words at him when another thought hit me. God, I was slow today. I can't believe that wasn't the first thing to process in my mind when he told me about this internship.

"Finn, when did you apply for this? When did you think to apply for this" I asked him shaking my head already in denial at the thought of what his answer might be.

No, no, he would have told me. He should have told me.

"Hero-" He began what was going to be an explanation not the answer I asked for, but he was interrupted by my fist hitting him hard on the chest.

He widened his eyes in surprise and I hit him again.

"Fucking answer me!" I yelled when he came forward over me and grabbed me by the wrists.

"Hero, stop!" He yelled back at me, gripping my firsts harder until I felt them burn with pain and quit struggling.

"When?" I asked again in a sob, looking him directly in the eyes.

"Two months ago." He replied not looking me in the eyes, and letting my hands fall to my lap.

I chuckled darkly.

"Two months, uh?!"

Silence grew around us. The only sounds being those of his deep breathing and my low sobs. I hadn't even realized was crying until then.

Finn broke the silence offering me a rather belatedly explanation.

"I never thought I'd get the spot. I just applied for the sake of trying that's why I didn't tell. It wasn't that important."

A sound that was half a chuckle, half a gasp came out of my mouth.

"Wasn't important? You planning on moving to another continent wasn't important enough a thing for you to tell me?"

I moved my leg trying to get off of him, but his arms came strongly around me, keeping me there, still straddling him.

"I didn't plan to leave, I just applied...but I want you to come with me." When he spoke his voice was all apologies.

His eyes searched for mine and they were so full of pleading and anguish it hurt me to look at him.

"Come with me, Hero. I cannot be without you."

I smiled wryly between sobs.

"Can't be without me? Is that why you've been lying to me for months?"

His thumbs brushed the tears away from my stained cheeks and he curled his fingers on my hair.

"I didn't lie to to you. I'd never do that." His voice was defensive.

"A lie of omission is still a lie, Finn." I said flatly, not accusing him of anything, simply stating a fact he knew to be true.

With both my palms flat on his shoulders I propelled myself up and moved back to the empty seat beside him. He didn't try to stop me this time.

I looked around, out the windows to make sure there was no one else in the parking lot.

Opening the door I jumped out of the car and quickly got in back again, but this time to the front passenger seat.

I opened up the glove compartment, to get my panties that were inside my purse, and put them back on. I put my dress back on too, and sat staring outside the parking lot through the windshield.

Somewhere in between the process of dressing myself, Finn had moved back to the driver's seat without me noticing.

"Come with me, please." I heard him speak from beside me, his voice was low, almost as if he were speaking to himself.

Something in the way he spoke made me feel a pang in my heart. I turned my face towards him. He was just staring ahead, looking at nothing specifically. I leaned in and pressed my nose to his shoulder. He turned his head, and his lips brushed mine. I opened my mouth to kiss him. I kissed him deeply and slowly, caressing his hair as I did it.

"I love you like crazy, Finland."

Finn's smile spread across my lips and he started kissing me harder, rendering me breathless, making me forget what I had to say.

"I promise you won't regret it, love."

I pulled back a little, breaking the kiss, but kept his face close to mine, our foreheads and noses still touching.

"Finn, I can't." I felt his body tense up. "I can't go with you."

He put his hands on my face and I put mine over his.

"Of course you can, Hero. You can, you just need to want to."

His breath was warm on my face and he ran his nose up and down on mine.

I shook my head.

"You know I can't, Finn."

He dropped his hands down and pulled his face away from mine. When I moved to touch him again, he winced, and pressed himself to the car door on his side.

"You can't tell me this now, when I have only a week left, and expect me to drop everything and follow you when you didn't even tell me about this plan of yours in the first place." I was the one with the pleading voice this time. "Just put yourself on my shoes. You know you couldn't go either."

Finn said nothing in reply. He just stood still and nodded. Then, he started putting his clothes back on.

It wasn't a good thing when he fell silent during a fight. Usually it meant he wasn't giving in. He was resolute. He thought himself to be right and wouldn't give in.

I expected him to get mad at this point and start listing all the reasons why I could and should go with him. He always had a ready, convincing argument to throw in whenever we had a fight, and most of the times he almost managed to convince me of his point being the right one. He didn't like to admit he was wrong, especially when he was. He was the proudest bastard I knew. So I couldn't believe my ears when he finally spoke after he'd finished buttoning his shirt.

"You're right."

Surprised, I asked.

"I am?"

He was holding the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles turned white.

"I didn't give you enough time. I should've told you all this before."

Finn turned to face me and took one of my hands on his. He intertwined his fingers with mine and looked down at our joined hands as he massaged my knuckles with his thumb.

"Here's what we're going to do." He sighed nervously. "I'll go first, in a week. You stay here, you sort out everything you need to, take your time and then come be with me."

I looked down at our hands and a fat tear rolled down my face. He lifted our hands up and wiped my cheek with the back of my own hand. He searched for my eyes and I looked up him.

"Finn." The way I said his name was enough for him to take his hands away from mine. "I can't. I can't go."

I reached to touch him again but he retreated and I felt a sharp pain in my chest.

I began trying to explain myself, even though I knew I had no fault in any of this.

"It's not just about moving away, Finn. It's all of it. You didn't tell me about it. You lied to me about what could be the most important decision of your life! Finn, you might never come back to England! And what about me? I still have a year of college left! My whole life is here, I can't just pack up and leave to another continent out of the blue like this!

Specially not when you give me so little time to make such a big decision!"

Everything came out in one single breath and my chest heaved when I finished talking.

He said nothing, he didn't even move, his face was impassive. It was like nothing I said got through to him.

I continued, not being able to deal with more silence.

"If you'd told me this as soon as you had the idea to apply for this program, I might have considered it then, I would've had more time to think about it, to prepare. But I can't now."

He kept quiet.

Unconsciously, my body had leaned in closer to his, I twirled the hem of my dress on my fingers.

He turned his face to look at me and my eyes met his full of pleading, asking him to understand.

"But I love you." He just said painfully, shaking his head slowly, a wry smile on his plump lips.

"I love you too" I replied in a small whimpering voice.

"Then why don't you just come with me? Stay with me, Hero?"

I drew my eyebrows together, the pain I felt inside stamped on my face.

"I can't-" But, before I could finish the phrase, Finn's fists came down on the steering wheel, sounding the horn and making jump, startled. I shivered, scared by his violent response.

I pressed my lips together, trying to stop the sobs coming out my mouth. There was nothing left for me to say. I couldn't go. He couldn't understand why. He wouldn't.

He'd lied to me. He had gone and done something he knew would affect us and chose not to tell me about it. He didn't share with me what turned out to be the most important decision of his life until now. And worst, it seemed to me he thought I had to go with him in order to prove that I loved him.

I glanced at his profile again. I saw a tear running down the side of his face. I had never seen him cry before. My heart sunk, and all I wanted to do was hug him, and comfort him, and tell him that I loved him more than life itself, but I also knew he wouldn't allow me to touch him.

I picked up my purse and opened up my door to leave when I felt his hand clutch my arm. I stopped, but didn't turn to look at him.

"Hero, please." He begged.

I turned my face and knew it was a mistake before I even took his expression in.

His eyebrows were drawn together, his eyes were red, and a mask of pure hurt covered his features.

"I can-I can't. I'm sorry." I stammered. My voice filled with pain.

Finn's face softened into a blank expression and he let go of my arm.

Once again free I left his car, closing the door behind me and walking back to the restaurant.

I didn't look back.

I didn't stop walking.

Tears were streaming down my face faster than I could wipe them away. I felt such emptiness inside, a punch in the gut would've been welcome just to make me feel something other than the pain of walking away from him knowing that that could be the last time I might see his face.