Unrequited Lust Ch. 02bysaintlymaya©
[I have finally decided to finish up this story. This is the second chapter; if you haven't read the first, read it before this one! There is no sex in this chapter, just plot development. Let me know what you think!]
Ahren couldn't think clearly. Fuck, he thought, how did I get into this mess? It wasn't supposed to be this way. Luckily, he had his own room, so no one was going to barge in on him. But people would be upset when they realized Lena was missing. Although, he thought with a smirk, it wasn't unusual for her to spend a night on her own.
His face paled when he looked at her on his bed. He'd tried to do everything for her---he'd washed her, made her drink some water, rubbed her hands and feet. She'd come out of it a bit, and had fallen asleep, a little dazed. Now she was clean and under his covers, her brown hair spayed against the pillow, her lids closed and eyelashes damp.
He still wanted her. He regretted what he did, but only because he hurt her. He couldn't regret her tight pussy and her moans and the feeling of dark control, of possessing her. Even now his cock got hard just thinking of what he could do to her, what he could make her to do him.
He'd never been one to force himself on anyone; he'd had plenty of bitches. They were practically throwing themselves on him after his shows, most of them high on his image and god knows what else. But Lena was different than the girls, he mused, his eyes staring darkly. She and him---they understood each other. They made fun of the crowds, she got his references. He could pass the time with her without fucking. It was fun to just bullshit.
They had an understanding together. She wanted Myer, he wanted no one. They both held onto being hard and cynical; they cherished it, needed it. Maybe that's why he had to get in her, had to clash with her, to prove that the darkness was more powerful. But he didn't expect her to suddenly turn soft and vulnerable.
Fuck this shit, he thought, rubbing his temple. Bitch is driving me crazy. I'll do what needs to be done, then it'll be out of my hair.
Lena woke with a start, sweaty and frightened. She was in her own room, under her blanket, fully clothed. Her bra was digging into her skin and she felt nauseous. She got up shakily and was in the shower when it hit her, everything that happened. She stumbled and almost fell, gripping the curtain. I'm not ready for this, she thought. Then she turned up the shower and began to scrub.
It was two hours before she felt clean enough to get out. She looked in the mirror, but she didn't look much different, except a bit more wide-eyed and pale. Why did he do it, she groaned. Why? It wasn't as if she had men on her every day, he couldn't have picked someone else?
And a little voice of shame crept up. You liked it, you liked what he was doing. You wanted it. You wanted more of him. Stop it, she told that dark voice. You go away.
Lena stalked back to her room, rummaging through her clothes. What kind of person was she? And who the hell was he? She'd been so afraid after, and then had vague foggy memories of his cleaning her, and then taking her back. How could she incorporate the gentleness with the cruelty she'd seen? And why did she feel so discarded? It was surely better now that she didn't have to see him, to face it. Yes, she thought. She didn't have to face it, no one would have to know. She was good at pretending; most people saw only what they wanted to see, and she would deliver.
It had been weeks since what Lena thought of as "the incident". She was feeling just fine, thank you. She'd played her part well, even more so, going to parties and drinking more heavily than she was used to. She was the life of the party, and she hadn't even seen him around to remind her. Which was unusual, she thought, but okay. Even if she did, she would be fine. She firmly nodded to herself as she stepped out of the Jane Austen workshop. It was the best class she'd had this semester, and fulfilled one of her creative writing requirements.
"That was amazing!" Jan said, catching up with her.
Lena looked at her roommate. "Yeah, I know. I don't think Prof Hendrickson likes it though. Getting together a bunch of Jane Austen enthusiasts can be dangerous."
"Hmmm.... I know. All the talk of true love must make Prof Hotty really uncomfortable. I bet just about everyone wants to bang him." Jan, a busty redhead, wriggled her eyebrows and thrust her breasts forward. "Can you imagine him in bed? Oh, Mr. Daaaaaawcy!" She licked her lips and grinned.
"Jan!" Lena laughed, and gave her a friendly push. "Not so loud, unless you want to get banned from class".
"Hmm, well, maybe if I get banned it would be easier to, you know." Jan fluffed her curly locks and made a kissy face, her eyes hopefully darting toward the professor's classroom.
"Okay, okay, I get it". Lena smirked, and shoved her friend outside onto the greens. "You know, I---." Her heart stopped and she felt her throat close.
"What is it?" Then Jan followed her gaze, through to Myer on the lawn with Jessica Tolby, their tonsils obviously interacting. She glared "That slutty sorority bitch!"
Lena's eyes teared up. "I just, I don't know---I thought, maybe... he and I could, but now..."
Jan patted Lena on the shoulder and led her to a bench. "You know, you don't need him. He's a bastard if he couldn't see what he had with you."
"But I need him! So what does it matter if he doesn't deserve me." She sent daggers toward Jessica, every man's dream, she thought, blond and tall and busty. "And look at me", gesturing to what she thought was limp hair and a skinny body. "And look at her!"
Jan sighed. "You know all that stuff is just theatrics. Look at me, these tits are not half as big as I make 'em. And these jeans have built in butt lifters." She preened as Lena snorted, then giggled. "It's true! It's all knowing the ways to canvas your body" She took in Lena's simple skirt, tank, and fresh face." And baby, you've come to the right person if you want to learn how to show it off." She grinned. "What say you we go back to the dorm and I'll show you what I mean?"
Three hours later, Lena studied herself in the mirror. With Jan's help, she couldn't help but feel transformed. She'd done sexy before, but her sexy was nothing like Jan's. When she normally went out she would throw on some gloss, put on a skirt and tank, smear on some black liner, and relied on her tough image to get her through. But now.... Jan had her put on makeup, real make up, she thought. Her eyes were smoky and shimmery, the bronze powder enhancing her green eyes. The lipstick was a matte rose, the combo somehow making her eyes stand-out even more. The mascara finished the look, and she had never seen her lashes so long, defined.... and sultry, she decided. And the clothes.... she studied the curve hugging ebony skirt, the bright purple lacy cami that showed a good deal of her lacy black push-up, and the matching purple heels. Jan had done something to give her hair body, she mused, examining the carefully constructed messy bed hair. The result was a bit vampy, keeping with her current image, but a lot sexier.
Jan came back into the room, humming to herself. She looked in the mirror, studied her own handiwork. She put her arm on Lena's and asked, "How do you feel?"
Lena grinned. "I feel like one bad ass bitch".
Jan squealed and threw her arms in a hug. "That's my girl! Now we better go out--- I want to show off my work and let's just see how dogboy Myer reacts to this!"
Lena smiled. "Who says I even want him anymore?"
Ahren groaned. These past few weeks had been hell. He'd carefully avoided any of Myer's parties, or even anyone in their circle. He'd avoided his friends and just gone internal. He told himself it was he was lying low to give Lena time, but he didn't even know anymore. He was more afraid now that if he went out he'd do something stupid again. He was itching to party, although these weeks had been good for practicing and writing some new music. He sighed. He should still stay away.
He heard a knock at the door, swore when he saw it was Myer, holding a beer and grinning. "Man, what the hell? And why are you grinning all goofy?"
Myer pushed his way in. "Tonight's the niiiiight", he sang, "that Jessica will sleep with me!" He took hold of Ahren's reluctant arms and twirled, holding him close.
Ahren pushed him away. "What the hell are you doing'! God!" Ahren tried to keep himself from laughing, settling on a half-glare, which wasn't quite working. "Look, I'm happy for you, it's good you're getting laid, but... get out!"
Myer was grinning the goofy grin again, telling Ahren this wasn't his first beer. "Come on, man" he said, propping his shoulder on steaming Ahren. "I'm telling you let's celebrate! I'm getting laid, let's go to a party to celebraaaaate."
"Okay, okay. But only because I know you're just going to keep singing, idiot".
"You got that riiiiiiight!"
Ahren barely managed to shove Myers out, yelling through the door "Come back in ten! And no more singing!". He sighed, and reached into his closet. Guess he was going out after all.
The party was off-campus, nothing like Myer's half-hidden dorm events, where inevitably they'd all had a rushed silence as an RA came on patrol. This was one of Gregory's parties and part of the music fraternity; that meant it was a draw for both sexes---the women went moon eyed over musicians and the men were happy to embellish tales of successful performances and drop names. To add to it, Gregory's parents were loaded--- they'd bought the large apartment complex and, if the stories were to be believed, had said "Go wild, this is the best time of your life". So naturally, Greg had the whole place to himself---which he had decked out with a jacuzzi, pool, full bar, top of the line entertainment center, and (strangely) a library.
When Ahren and Myers arrived, a very high Greg had greeted them, shaken their hands, and had tried to give them a tour of the house. He'd stopped when he realized there was hardly room to move. Giving up, he now sat in a corner smoking a bowl. Myer had then ditched Ahren for Jessica, taking her arm and going god knows where. Shit, Ahren smirked, they were probably doing it in the bathroom. What a slut. He took another slug of whiskey. There were rumors of a poker game downstairs, and he was almost sober. He grinned, taking his whiskey as he headed down, let's see how many suckers are here tonight.
Lena finally felt whole again, dancing in the crowd. Her body had a fine sheen of sweat, and her cami was sticking to her body. Her head was rolled back and she swished her new hair to the rock music, letting the beats take her over. Jan had been beside her for the first hour, but inevitably had found her Mr. Right Now, gave her a wink, and said she'd find her later. Or not, Lena grinned, thinking that Jan really needed it.
She felt like a new person. When she'd walked in Gregory almost hadn't recognized her (although she couldn't quite be sure since he wasn't necessarily in the best state of mind), then gave a long low whistle. The reactions from others had been that much more potent---with one of her Bio classmates almost dropping his drink. She knew know how Jan felt, and wondered why she had waited so long to release this side of herself.
Now Lena couldn't be happier, grinding against a clarinetist with a sweet face and demeanor. Ethan was a bit shy at first, telling her it was his first party. She'd had to show him how to dance---which was pretty fun, especially his expression when she encouraged him to grind her hips against his. Now he was looking up at her with a breathless expression that sent a welcome shot of power straight through her.
Maybe the perfect guy to break the spell, she thought. Easy and painless--- best of all, she would be in control. She sighed, letting Ethan take hold of her--- this was turning out to be a great night.
Ahren was livid as he watched Lena grind into some nameless pretty boy. He'd thought, hell, after the way she'd acted---he'd wanted to take care of her and protect her. But now, he realized that while he'd been shutting himself in, she'd been out this whole time. His eyes narrowed as he took in her short skirt, all but exposing her ass, and her shirt with her tits all but popping out. God, he wanted to take her, to slam her into the wall, to show her who was boss. He wanted to dominate her, to own her. It was all he could do to stop himself from dragging her to one of those rooms---but he remembered those hurt eyes and the guilt hit him. He grimaced and stalked out of the room. It was time to leave the party.
Lena had noticed Ahren the moment he walked into the room and determined to keep on her front. She felt him stare at her coldly and inwardly shivered. Once, she thought, she would've given hell for him to look at her that way. And now it was ruined. She was scared of him, she realized. Not of only what he could do to her, but what he could make her feel. She'd never had anyone who could go with her into that dark place, no one who understood what it did to her.
Ethan brought her back to her senses, tightening his arms against her. She didn't have to go back to there. She was a new person.