Vibrator Jack

"Well I do."

"Thank god for that. I prefer a woman who thinks soundly."

In the cab Jacqi was appalled that in a single hand thrust Jack was able to determine she was without panties. God he wasn't suppose to find out that until later, very much later. God what a seducer!

"What award are you up for?

"What?" she asked stupidly, her mind apparently closed down.

He grinned and moved a finger right against it and she automatically opened her legs.

"Ohmigod," she yelled, and snapped her legs together.

The cab driver asked, "Are you okay miss?"

"Um yes thank you. I-I er just remembered I'd forgotten condoms."

"They have them in coin-operated dispenser machines at the Events Center miss."

"Oh thank you. What immense relief."

She turned to Jack and his face was a picture due to suppressed laughter. He then placed a finger under her nose and she could smell herself. Oh god, was she caught in a nightmare?

"Three actually."

For the first time she was aware of Jack appeared to be nonplussed. She enjoyed that little victory. "You had asked how many categories were I a finalist in."

"Oh thanks," he said, and sniffed that finger.

Jacqi felt faint in embarrassment.

They entered the arena behind three couples Jacqi easily identified through her associations as a news reporter. They were the president of the Chamber of Commerce and his wife, the Mayor and her husband and the Lieutenant Governor and his wife. To her astonishment the waiting TV and press cameras focused not on the VIPs and not on her.

"Mr Holt, please adopt a sexy pose with Miss Fontaine."

"Mr Holt, how have you managed to attract Miss Fontaine. She is reputedly an ice-maiden."

"Mr Holt..."

"Guys I scarcely know Miss Fontaine. I met her in a sleazy bar and asked her for a date and she suggested tonight. Please don't ask how good she is at sex? We haven't even really kissed yet."

"Kiss her, pose in a kiss," one of the cameramen urged, none of them really realizing that all this was being relayed through the arena sound system because the official greetings official had her microphone switched on ready to greet the official party but she'd been pushed away by the surge of media people."

"Jacqi may I kiss you?"

"Yes Jack. Kissing you for the first time doesn't automatically classify me as a slut."

The noise in the arena fell and then boomed in a huge wave of laughter.

"Ohmigod, my microphone is on," said the embarrassed greeter.

"It doesn't matter ma'am," said Jack nobly. "A little notoriety will assist Jacqi Fontaine in her distinguished career as a reporter on TV 9."

"Oh god," Jacqi sighed, and went into a clinch and kiss, giving the media what they wanted.

They had a great time and were on a lively table. Towards the end of dinner a drunk women leaned across the table and said in a very loud voice for everyone on the table to hear, "Well Mr Smart Attorney, could you tell we women married to unappreciative husbands what they can expect if we decide to divorce them?"

"That's easy Kitty. It applies on both sides and can be summed up in one word."

Everyone leaned forward and some people on adjoining tables turned and practically cupped their ears.

"Pain," Jack said solemnly and most people rolled around in laughter.

The tedious presentation of awards began with the winners and runners-up invariably lying through their teeth and declaring, "This is a complete surprise."

Jack whispered to Jacqi, "If you are called up say something arrestingly original. People remember if you do and people who succeed in your business are top personalities."

"I can't think of anything original," Jacqi moaned and was told it would drop out of her mouth is she put her brain into gear.

Jacqi was called as runner-up in the category of 'Most bizarre news interview."

"Jacqi went to interview visiting British film star Dame Margaret Mew who unfortunately was unavailable so she interviewed one of Dame Margaret's minders who said Dame Margaret had been seized by dysentery. They had this hilarious discourse about dysentery and how it can come on unexpectedly."

The presenter then showed the clip had had everyone in fits of laughter.

"I wish to thank everyone who assisted me," Jacqi said. "I arrived back late with the tape and the news producer called my interview crap. Unfortunately for him his instruction to can it led to the wrong clip being canned and it ran. For that I thank my script supervisor Darryl Watts for having the grace after his humiliation to press for this clip to be entered in the annual awards."

Jacqi was called again for winner of the most inappropriate lucky-to-screen clip award. It was run without the 'Bleep' and the clipped showed Jacqi attempting to shut the guy up but he continued on monotonously in monotone. At the end of the clip Jacqi was shown ripping at her hair and yelling, "Will you shut the fuck up!" and looking ready to murder the guy.

She accepted the award in good humor. "Thank you. I have something to decorate my toilet. Sorry everyone. I'm a discredit to my profession. As you can see right at the end I was having a bad hair day."

Women and some men in the know about females who have bad hair days laughed and applauded Jacqi generously.

Jack patted her backside as Jacqi returned to the table and said, "good one."

They stayed on partying and then Jack took her home. In the foyer of the house he said, "Well this is good night."

They kissed and Jack pressed in hard against her, gripping both of her as cheeks and she gave a couple of hip sways to pull her groin over his boner but then Jack said, "That was a memorable evening, really great and you were immaculate company."

Jacqi looked stunned when Jack pulled away and began leaving.

"But... but aren't we going to... you know?"

"Just call me one day Jacqi when you need a lawyer. It's best you are not seen with me right now because you're building your career."

"Jack, you can't leave me like this," Jacqi wailed desperately and began crying when Jack waved again and went out, opening the unlocked side of the double front doors and closing it softly as he departed. Jack felt a real heel but he'd made his choice. Jacqi's career was on the move and she should concentrate on that rather than him... or any other guy for that matter. He had a good idea Jacqi would come back to him.

Jack's mom appeared as he unlocked the side door after garaging her car.

"Coffee?"

"Thanks mom."

"We watched the awards on TV. It was pretty so-so."

"Yeah?"

"But this piece of media fluff you were dating was a better class of young woman for you."

"Yeah."

"Meaning?"

"She's a better class of young woman than those currently associating with me. So that's why it's over before it starts. She has talent mom and won't learn to fly with me hanging round her with the type of media attention I'm attracting."

"But Jack you're really not walking the wild side. You should..."

"No mom. Do you mean to be showing your tits to me like that?"

"Oh no," Laudonia yelped, unable to believe her gown had gaped open unnoticed. She checked; it hadn't.

"God Jack, you are such a tease. That lovely women is better off without you."

Oh god, Laudonia said muttered as she glimpsed Jack's face as he turned from her. I hope you know what you're doing."

Brushing his teeth Jack thought his mom had helped pushing him like that, forcing him to really think about Jacqi. He really didn't want to lose her. As he climbed into bed it came to him: he'd call her every Wednesday just to stay in touch. He wanted her to keep thinking a little about him, just a little.

* * *

Jack and Myra were busy with more than two hundred approaches from people wishing to become clients. Jack instructed Myra to send out new client applications to each of them with a covering letter their application would be assessed and Jack would decide whether he could represent them. Applicants who fitted his 'business profile' would be invited in for a personal discussion. The term 'business profile was meant to be decidedly obscure.

A couple of days later Jack was eating in the firm's café which he did occasionally to lunch with other attorneys when a sad-faced woman who worked as an Estate Planning legal consultant came up and said "Hi Jack, may I join you?"

"Yeah sure, please sit," he said standing, wiping imaginary or real breadcrumbs from his mouth. He was eating Spanish soup and two bread rolls. He had recognized the face and remembered what she did but not her name. He'd been introduced to 136 attorneys and main support staff and his memory wasn't infallible. So he guessed, "It's Regina isn't it?"

"No she's in Interstate Issues. I'm Sally Sinclair. May we chat personally and confidentially about nothing to do with law?"

"Yeah of course."

"My husband left me three months ago..."

"Whoa Sally. I thought you said this has nothing to do with law?"

"That's correct. Harry Struthers is handling my divorce application. So it's been weeks and weeks since I've been in male company and I miss it terribly. I'm asking may I take you to a movie of your choice? We don't have to commit to dinner or anything else."

"Sure."

"Excuse me but aren't you going to ply me with questions?"

"What to satisfy myself you are a suitable person to accompany me to a movie? We don't have to be licensed to do that, as you should know, and with 'no blame' divorce in this state I can't be implicated in your divorce."

"Oh my embarrassment in approaching you for a date has clouded my thinking. It's just you answer flew at me, catching me by surprise. I know I had legal training to equip me to handle that but..."

"Sally enough of the semantics and apologies. If I asked you for a date would you have been nonplused like you are now?"

"No of course not."

"Then why can't women get it into their heads, the Berlin Wall is down, the self-appointed Moral Police have been forced underground and women are free to ask men for a date?"

"Um we are the weaker sex?"

"No it's because it will take a radical mind shift to pull the female sex out of centuries of suppression. But let's go to a movie and then to dinner and by then we ought to know if we like one another enough to have sex."

"Sex?"

"This is what this is about isn't it?"

Blonde Sally with incredibly light blue eyes, an ample chest and lips that curled out slightly, suggesting they could be put to good purpose, blushed and nodded.

"Great. You now know I know and I know you know I know so, phew, let's relax about this eh? You have caught me at exactly the right time. Please oh please don't talk to anyone in the office about this. If we are seen together then too bad. I just want you to talk to no one about this, even if my mother calls you in for a lovely wee chat."

"Your mother, oh god. We are scared of her."

"That's just the bullshit associated with position of power Sally. If she asks simply say circumstances mean you are not in the position to answer."

"God she'd chew my head off if I said that."

"Well I don't think she'd ask you that question Sally, I was using it as an example of dealing with anyone."

"Under the circumstances I'm not in the position to answer that question/allegation or respond to this inquisition."

"Good girl. So will you promise to say nothing to anyone?"

"Yes."

"And likewise I promise to say nothing to anyone about any association with you. So it's the movies then?"

"Yes. I can't believe I've got this far with you. Everything inside me was screaming don't approach him Sally."

"Well I'm glad you had the guts to ignore that negativism. I must go. I appreciated talking to you."

Jack then really lowered his voice said, "You appear very fuckable Sally; believe me."

Sally clutched above her bosom and breathed, "Ohmigod."

* * *

Jack entered and looked around Sally's apartment and said it was well laid-out, roomy and beautifully kept.

"Thanks," Sally said, returning with two white wines. "I loved the movie but thought the restaurant meal was crap."

"Here's something my father taught me and I generally adhere to it. If you want fish choose a reputable fish restaurant. Otherwise choose steak and send it back to the kitchen if it's unsatisfactory."

"That's good advice. So are we really going to have sex?"

"Pull out your tits for me Sally. They look to be a couple of beauties."

"Um shouldn't we go to the bedroom first?"

"Forget the bedroom Sally. Let's have the first one over the dining table."

Eyes huge, Sally began unbundling her breasts.

That made Jack's eyes open wide and from that point he allowed Sally to call the shots.

Four hours he was running on empty on the cab ride home. Oh boy, was Sally so happy with him.

On Wednesday Jack called Jacqi.

"Oh hi, I didn't expect to hear from you again."

"Wrong I plan to call you every Wednesday to check on how you're going and to avoid you forgetting me."

"Is this remote way of staying in touch worthwhile?"

"It depends on attitudes. You'll find out next Wednesday."

"Find out what?"

"You'll tell me if you find out."

They chatted and when Jack had to go Jacqi asked how did he get her private phone number.

"From your mother. She said she was astonished I'd dropped you because she'd thought I appeared to be so keen about you. I said have patience Louise, just watch this space."

"Oh yeah? Dad and I can't believe you call mother Louise. We can't recall any guy under forty calling her by her first name."

"Why be in awe of her just because she has big shoulders and stands I guess six-two. Approximately 65% of the human body is water, give or take a bit, so all of us are the same to that extent."

"What a refreshing way of looking at people. I dislike that usual putdown that we all sit to crap."

They laughed and said goodbye. Only then did Jack remember he'd forgotten the purpose of his call... to ask Jacqi how she was doing.

The following Wednesday when he called just before midnight Jacqi said she was in bed reading. "I've been waiting for your call ever since breakfast time this morning."

Jack remained silent.

"Ohmigod, you clever asshole. That's what you told me last Wednesday when you said if I knew I'd tell you. I've told you I was waiting all day for your call."

"You're not just a pretty face are you Jacqi?"

"Couldn't you say Jacqi darling."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because it's my choice to stand off like this. If I call you darling it's like branding you and I want you retaining your freedom to have any guy you wish."

Jacqi burst into tears and said he was making it so difficult for her.

"Cut the crap Jacqi. You wish to make it to the top as a frontline TV reporter so I'm sorry but tears are not for you. For you it's kick ass or call people assholes... well be discriminating about that otherwise you could land in trouble. How are you doing Jacqi?"

"I'm missing you terribly."

Jack laughed teasingly. "We only went out the once."

"But you exhibited such huge potential. I'm fretting and mommy told me she can see it in my face when I denied I was fretting."

"Well use a marking pen and write my name on one of your dildos or vibrators."

"God Jack, you can't talk to me like that?"

"Oh my apologies Jacqi. What is your next rule?"

"I don't want to bind you with rules. Just keep calling me Wednesdays. Good night my man. I'm off to write a name on something."

Jack switched off his phone and grinned, wondering if she would talk to the device by name. That thought rather appealed to him.

* * *

Monotonously whenever Jack and his parents were together with drinks and watching the news at 6:00 him mom would say, "Oh Jack isn't she lovely" as Jacqi came on screen.

Jacqi was presenting the lead local item more frequently and as she'd told him during a weekly phone call her assignments were becoming increasingly important. On this particular night as Jacqi was completing a voice-over she signed off and added, "Awesome gift thanks Jack."

"What did Jacqi say?" his mom said, sitting up straight.

Jack said, "She took a big risk delivering me a personal message but would not have acted recklessly. She must have won the approval of her producer. She'd know to do that."

"But broadcasting transmission rules forbid..."

"She'd taken a huge risk mom. Leave it. If she'd dismissed I'll fight for her reinstatement."

"God you two are irresponsible. What was the gift?"

"It's her birthday today so I sent her a trinket."

"Jack how can a gift described by a discerning woman as awesome be a trinket?"

"Mom please leave it. I'm calling it an undefined trinket. End of conversation."

Jack thought there was no way he could tell his mom he'd sent Jacqi an expensive vibrator in a polished aluminum gift case with his full name engraved on the dildo by a special fusion process that left the surface perfectly smooth.

Next afternoon Jacqi, her voice sounded very strong, said, "You told me to call if I ever needed an attorney. Well I need you. I have been suspended pending a disciplinary committee hearing. I'm entitled to legal representation. My producer has also been suspended."

"What happened? I heard you deliver the message to me last night."

"We conspired to beat the system but lost. At worst we could both be fired. The station has received a few complaints citing my unacceptable indiscretion or words to that effect."

"Okay tell your producer I'll also represent him if he wishes. I'll file this as a business promotion case which means I must generate publicity to surround the hearing and that means there will be no fees payable by my client or clients."

"Great but I need to discuss this with Pauline."

"Who's Pauline?"

"The producer."

"Oh do they allow females to have positions of responsibility like that in the TV industry?"

"Ohmigod, you know nothing about TV do you?"

"Ease up baby, that was just a tease."

Jacqi sighed. "God Jack, I was being very strong about that and am determined to meet the assholes head-on if they suggest our offence deserves anything more than a rap on the knuckles plus a week's stand down without pay."

"God Jacqi, that's not the right attitude. We are going to take on the assholes and win."

"Jack you really don't know a thing about the internal workings of the TV industrial process do you?"

"Not now, but by the time I front up for you guys I will. Listen baby, in the final climax it's not about what people did or didn't do and TV station rules and regulations; it comes down to who blinks."

"Oh god, you see it as the shootout at O.K. Corral don't you?"

"Not really, well you know. Oh we'll need to produce your new vibrator as evidence."

"Jack!"

"Keep calm. That was a windup. I'll win this for you baby. Believe me."

Jack finished the call thinking how reckless can one get? Jacqi would regard that as a promise.

"Oh heck!"

CHAPTER 3

Two days later Jack went to the disciplinary hearing prepared as best he could. He called up a pal working in advertising on a rival TV station and took his pal and the assistant station manager for lunch and learned in general about the operation of the TV news service, the safeguards to prevent malicious broadcasts, the check systems in place, the station rules and broadcast regulations and station policies.

"Most TV stations adopt those tried and proven systems," said Peter Swain, the station's assistant operations manager. "Are you representing Pauline Payne in her disciplinary hearing?"

"The name Pauline was mentioned to me but I've heard nothing more. I'm representing Jacqi Fontaine."

"Well good luck Jack but I would think she's gone and Pauline will probably escape with a year or two loss in seniority, possible even a complete grading step. It's regarded as a crime Jack."