"Oh..." Victoria whimpered, her knees turning quickly into jelly. "Oh shit..."
She felt Lola smile against her neck, and she kissed her there. "I know. You don't know how long I wanted to claim you back for my own..."
"I want to be yours," Victoria whispered to her. "I want you to be mine..."
"I've always been yours," Lola replied, smiling broader when Victoria gasped out loud then. "That's it baby. Do you want me to make you come?"
"Yes," Victoria replied. "Please. Please make me come, Lola..."
Lola nodded. "Yes, come on, baby," she said as Victoria extended one of her legs and put one of them on the bookshelf behind them. "Ooh," Lola said, skipping a finger inside of her.
"Ah!" Victoria cried out as Lola instantly found her g-spot. She moved back and forth by pushing with her shoe against the bookshelf. "Faster, faster, faster," she moaned into Lola's ear. "Right there, right there, right there! Yes!" she cried out as she came all over Lola's fingers. "I want to do that to you," she whispered as Lola licked her fingers.
"No," replied Lola. "When you graduate, I'll take you to a hotel and we'll go all the way, okay?"
Victoria nodded. "Okay."
Lola smiled and kissed her. "You and I will make fake email accounts and only give the addresses to each other," she instructed her.
She nodded. "Okay."
"And we'll plan our trysts with that, okay?"
Victoria nodded. "Yes."
Lola smiled. "But until then, we'll have to be very careful, okay?"
Victoria nodded again. "Okay."
"The utmost discretion is needed. None of this can be told, because then we can't ever be together."
Victoria sighed. She wanted Lola forever. "Utmost," she replied.
Lola smiled. "Okay." She peered closely at Victoria. "No dating. You're mine."
Victoria nodded vigorously. "You either. You're very much mine."
Lola smiled. "I'd have it no other way, Victoria."
"Neither would I, Ms. Collins," she replied.
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English
Potential
Kitten, you've got potential but you're just so careless with your writing. I don't know if you write faster than you think, or you're too eager to get a chapter finished, or you don't think things through, or you can't be bothered to check over your work, or a combination of all these. Whatever, you could improve considerably if you would just take the time to thoroughly vet your writing. It might help if you were to find yourself a good (and I mean good) editor.more...
Proof Read, Proof Read, Proof Read!
The story was quite fun but the typos and continuity mistakes were very distracting.
Only rated a 3*
It seems unfinished
The whole scene in the prison and the grandmothers feels superfluous to the story, as if there is supposed to be a lot more. Victoria just jumps back to school and wham, sex time. The initial build-up is wasted that way.
I would have like to hear more of the MC's troubled past, her fling at the party. The sex on the side of the road was thrown out there and forgotten. Why did victoria seem so happy to be meeting the boy for a hook-up when she wasn't interested in him?
Flesh things out and its more interestng.more...
Liked it like the others
I enjoyed reading this just like your other two series. I'm waiting for the drama though lol. Type fast!
P.s. please don't make them cheat on each other. Those parts make me sad
Mixed results
I very much enjoyed your writing. The story, however, seemed rushed and incomplete. Even though it doesn't come out in the narrative, I get the impression that you have developed a back story for your characters. I would really like to read a more fleshed out version of this story.more...
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