Walking in Daylight Ch. 03

"I'm so sorry, Pen. I wish..."

His hand reached out to wipe away the single tear that spilled from the gorgeous green eyes. The skin of the pale cheek was so soft beneath his fingers, satin smooth. The few male cheeks he'd touched before weren't so smooth and soft. It fascinated Ryan so much that he gently touched the rest of the face, tracing from the forehead, down the temple to the jaw and chin. Pen's lips parted as his breathing sped up and Ryan took the opportunity to touch those as well, ghosting over the sensual fullness.

Though he wanted to push his fingers into the blond hair, the impulse was curbed by the arrival of their dinner. Ryan blinked and pulled back quickly, surprised by his actions, before hurrying to answer the door. What had come over him? It felt like he was taking advantage of a young man who didn't need any more complications in his life.

Glancing back quickly to see Pen, he noticed the features of the delicate face were pale and drawn. To give him time to compose himself, Ryan bade Pen stay in the living room to relax while he set the table and dished up the food. Candles would be nice, but that might be a bit much right now.

He was learning so much about himself. Until seeing Pen again, he'd thought that dinner with a woman meant wine, roses, and candles, while dinner with a man was just food, beer and sports on the television. That wasn't the case tonight. Ryan wanted to give Pen everything, all the romance and attention he had in him. It was strange and disconcerting. It felt right.

When all was ready, Ryan started to call Pen in, only to find the younger man leaning in the doorway. There was a light blush across the fine cheekbones and it looked very attractive.

"Do you want to see? What Alex did after you talked to him the other day, I mean?" Ryan stilled at Pen's question.

"Only if you want to show me. Only if you're comfortable enough with me."

Long, slender fingers slowly undid the buttons on the white shirt. When the edges parted, Ryan sucked in his breath. They were old, but bruises covered the abdomen, barely leaving a hint of the pale skin. Pen presented his back and allowed the short to fall from his shoulders, showing off those marks. The bruises varied in colour from a yellowish-green to almost black. The worst of the bruising was around the kidneys and lower back.

"God, doesn't it hurt? You must be in agony!"

Pen looked at him, head tilted to the side as he did up the shirt once more. His expression was almost puzzled. "No, little twinges now and then, but nothing terrible. I've had much worse. I didn't show you for pity or sympathy, Ryan. I showed you so you would know that, well, this is what my life is. I'm used to it. The worst was, of course, the beating at the school, even though that wasn't the first time. It wasn't even the first time I was in the hospital. What Alex did, what any of my boyfriends did, isn't a big deal. I showed you so you would know that you don't need to ride in and save me.

"Alex is gone now, but some day, eventually, there will be someone new in my life. All will be good in the beginning, full of promises of love and caring, which will become fists and kicks and insults. I'm used to it, it's what I know, and it's likely what I deserve. Don't think that it should be your job or even your business to interfere in my life. You'd probably only make things worse. When you chose not to believe me that day, it didn't turn my life into this, Ryan. You're not responsible for any of it."

"You don't deserve it Pen! For God's sake, nobody deserves to be treated like that. What you deserve is to be loved and pampered and treated with respect! I would never, ever hurt you like that." His cheeks heated at his declaration, though he wasn't sure if it was because he was angry at the accepting attitude or because he spoke of being closer to the young blond.

"There won't be a chance for you to either hurt or not hurt me, Ryan. Besides, there are things that hurt more than a jab to the kidneys, you know. Come on, you promised me dinner and coffee, and I'm starting to get hungry."

Neither one spoke very much while they ate the Chinese take-out. Ryan thought about both the injuries he'd seen and the soft-spoken rebuke to his words. Apparently, Pen was not open to there being anything between them other than this meal. It made him feel sad and lonely. He wished he could think of something to say to change Pen's mind about how he deserved to be treated. Until the right thing came to him, he would just have to keep his own counsel. Actions spoke louder than words, anyway, so maybe that would be the best way to go.

The wine was all gone by the time the two returned to the living room with their cups of coffee. Ryan frowned and tried to remember drinking it. He must have drunk most of it, because he could only remember filling Pen's glass twice, only halfway at that. His companion was talking about his recent move, his voice so soft and low. Without thinking, he blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"You're very beautiful, Pen. I've always thought so, even the first time I met you and you were sitting on the grass."

Pen looked over at him speculatively, as though trying to discover if he was being truthful or not, so Ryan kept his eyes fixed on the green ones. A soft smile curved the full lips after a moment. "You want to kiss me? You can, you know. All you have to do is move a little closer and do it."

With a groan, Ryan complied, unable to resist any longer. This was the person who showed him that he was interested in men as well as women. If not for Pen, he wouldn't have figured out what it was that was missing from his life. His cock filled up quickly, eager for the touch Ryan waited for. Those lips opened sweetly beneath his, letting him in. He could taste their meal and the wine inside the hot mouth. Pen slid his tongue alongside, not so much engaging him as encouraging.

Hearing the low moan, Ryan pulled the smaller man up against him. Pen straddled his legs and held onto his face, fingers moving up and down in a slow caress. Groin to groin, the two of them began to rock together, both of them hard and starting to breathe harder. Ryan opened his eyes and looked at the beautiful face. Those green eyes were dark with passion now and held a hint of mischief.

Without warning, Pen wriggled down Ryan's body, going to his knees between long, strong legs. Agile fingers worked at the trousers, hurrying to open them and get to the prize inside. He leaned forward and pressed his face to the cotton underwear, taking in the scent of aroused male. With a small tap, Pen encouraged Ryan to lift up so he could get the pants and underwear down.

"Oh, that's really nice," he breathed, eyes fixed on the long prick, thick enough that one of his hands would barely reach around. "I need to taste that."

"Taste it. Whatever you want."

Tasting could come soon enough. First, Pen wanted to just examine and memorize the look of it. This was his one night with Ryan and he didn't want to rush it. He traced a fingertip from the thick curls, a couple shades darker than on Ryan's head because they weren't in contact with the sun, up to the tip. He followed the most prominent vein, smiling at the shiver that resulted. When his finger finished the journey, he ran it through the moisture that decorated the slit and brought it to his mouth. God it was delicious!

Resisting that taste proved impossible. Leaning forward, Pen licked around the head while he pumped his hand, urging more liquid to seep out. While he teased, he tried to determine how best to administer the blowjob. There was no way he could take more than maybe half into his mouth, but he wanted this to be amazing for Ryan.

His thoughts whirled as he licked and kissed his way down the steely shaft to the balls. Pen wet the sack thoroughly, taking his time by using only the tip of his tongue, dragging it everywhere again and again. "Damn, Pen, please...it's so...I need..." That babble was just wonderful. It proved that he was doing a good job, but there was so much more he wanted to do. Without warning, Pen finally sucked one of the balls into his mouth, sucking and licking it before letting it pop out. The other received the same treatment.

Ryan's hips bucked up and one of his hands automatically moved to caress the top of the head between his legs. He was careful not to use force to direct Pen where he most wanted the attention of that hot, sweet mouth. He couldn't remember ever being so aroused, and that mouth hadn't even wrapped around his cock yet.

Even while he thought that, moist, wet heat glided over his shaft. Fuck! No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop the thrusts. His eyes wouldn't open either, rolling into the back of his head with every move Pen made. That boy's mouth was nothing short of magical!

I want this to last. I want something to remember. Pen took as much of the hard cock into his mouth as he could, then wrapped one hand right below his lips. As he pulled back up, sucking hard, that hand followed. He came off completely, but the hand continued until his palm rubbed over the tip. Then he went back down as far as he could again. Pen whimpered as he continued in this manner for a few minutes, loving the gasps and cries of the man he wanted to pleasure.

"Fucking Hell! That's the best. Fuck. Nobody's ever done me so good. Pen, fuck! Again. Oh shit."

The pace increased bit by bit. Pen switched hands and dropped the hand lubricated with spit and pre come to rub at the soft, sensitive spot behind Ryan's balls. It didn't take long before the massage and suction made Ryan shout and snap his hips forward, pushing the long prick further into his mouth.

He gagged slightly, but recovered quickly enough to swallow each spurt of come. Some dripped out of the corner of his mouth, but he didn't mind. It was even more delicious than he'd expected, not too thick or bitter. It was the first time he'd enjoyed the taste so much.

Satisfied with both the experience and the vague murmurs he heard from Ryan, Pen laid his head on the muscular stomach and pressed open-mouthed kisses to the skin there. His hair was stroked for a few moments, but it soon stopped. He waited a bit before lifting his head to see Ryan fast asleep. Pen dared a kiss on that lovely mouth, just a soft touch that wouldn't awaken Ryan. It was time for him to go.

Quietly he went to the shelf and took down an album he'd looked at earlier, while Ryan prepared their dinner. He removed the only two pictures inside and dropped the empty album on nearby chair. In the kitchen, he found some paper and pens and scribbled a quick note, which he tucked into the album. It wasn't what he wanted to say. He wanted to tell the man how happy he was that they'd seen each other again, and that he thought Ryan was wonderful. That wasn't what was best, however.

With a sad sigh, he slipped out of the apartment and came face to face with Joey. "Um, hey. What...I mean, how are you doing?"

"P! Well, Pen I guess. Ryan told me your name. How are you doing?"

"I'm good, away from Alex is good. I just wish you hadn't said anything to Ryan. Alex was very, um, upset about that visit, and I was only a day or two away from leaving him anyway." Joey bit his lip and smiled his apology.

"I was just so worried about you. Harvey was too. I was so glad when Ryan told me that you'd moved out and left Alex, you have no idea. Harvey left me, though, before I found out, but I know he'd be happy too."

Pen opened his mouth to say how sorry he was, but Joey waved a hand to stop him. "Don't worry about it. I'm off on a trip for work, which will take my mind off things. How about we get together for lunch when I get back? Here's my number and you give me a call next weekend to work something out."

After a hug and kiss, they parted company. Pen couldn't help but wonder what had happened between the two, since they'd seemed so in love and together. After a moment, however, his thoughts went back to the note he left in the apartment, hoping it wasn't a mistake.

I hope you got what you wanted from me, Ryan. I've taken the pictures you have of me, because they're mine. You had no right to keep them. Stay away from me. Don't try to contact me and don't look up information on me. I just want to be left alone. Thanks for dinner. Pen.