Wanting

This is an edited version of the original.

*

Have you ever wanted something so bad that your hair hurt and your teeth itched? That's the way I felt about Cindy Shipman. I was completely enamored of the girl. I would have crawled on my bare belly through broken beer bottles from Seattle to San Diego just to hear her piss in a tin cup over the telephone! I tell you, I had it bad. There was, of course, no hope that this union could ever take place. She was the head cheerleader and I was just a math nerd. Every day of my senior year in high school, I longed for just a whiff of her perfume. Anything!! She could piss on me and I would smile.

She wasn't about to piss on me. She had never spoken to me. I didn't think she would piss on me if I was on fire. Her crowd was the "pretty people."

My crowd was the straight A; we belong to MENSA brain trust. All my friends and I were doing part time college level work after school at the local college, (MIT) and we all had scholarships to highly regarded universities. All of us had tested well into the 'genius' range of braindom. I scored the highest score in the eastern region four years in a row. But when it came to Cindy, I was dumber than a post.

My goal was theoretical physics and I had already surpassed my instructors' ability to teach me anything, hence the college courses. I had offers to enroll in college, but I just couldn't leave Cindy. I was told that every genius has a real stupid spot and Cindy was mine.

Just after Halloween, I was walking up the hall to math class when I heard the voice of an angel calling my name. I kept walking. I wasn't given to hallucinations, but on the other hand, it all starts somewhere.

"Chester, oh Chester."

Hmmm. Maybe it wasn't an hallucination after all. I slowly turned and there she was! The girl of my dreams was calling my name and walking toward me. My first instinct was to run like hell. I froze on the spot. I didn't know what to do.

She walked right up to me. I had never been this close to her before. I thought I was going to faint.

"Hey Chester," she smiled.

It took a little while to convince my mouth to work but I finally managed to croak, "Hey Cindy."

"You're pretty much of a whiz at math aren't you?"

"Well, yeah, I suppose," I murmured.

"Well, I'm doing really badly in math class and I thought I would ask you to help me."

I could barely breathe as I wheezed, "I would really like that."

"Oh good," she cried, "meet me after school and we'll walk over to your place together." She wiggled her superior little ass and sped off down the hall.

I elected not to tell my friends about this encounter because I didn't want to be called a liar. I decided that this would be just between Cindy and me. Besides, there were some awfully large guys that hung out with her and I didn't want any of them mad at me.

The day dragged along with a speed that makes turtles look supersonic. Finally the last bell rang and I headed out into the street to wait for her. She was already there. Gulp!

"Come on, let's go," she said. She walked unashamedly beside me all the way home. I couldn't believe it.

When we got home, my parents were gone. There was a note that said, "Emergency trip to California. See you in two weeks. We'll call tonight." This wasn't unusual. They were both nuclear engineers and were often called away to fix something.

"Parents are gone," I told Cindy. "If you want I'll just walk you home."

"Don't be silly. I came here to get help and I expect that's what I'll get," she replied. "Where can we work?"

"We could go to my lab," I answered.

"Lab? You've got a lab?"

"Yeah. I don't let hardly anybody down there, but for you I'll make an exception."

"Lead on," she replied.

I went down the basement steps to my lab. I had experiments in various stages running everywhere. On one wall was a large blackboard that covered almost the entire wall. The formulas I had been working on covered it completely.

Cindy stared at the blackboard. "Did you do that?" she asked with a touch of awe in her voice.

"Yeah," I shyly answered.

"What does it mean?"

"I'm looking for Hawking radiation."

"On a blackboard?"

"Well it's all math and all theory."

"Wow," she said reverently. "What is Hawking radiation?"

"In a nutshell, it is theoretically, the only known emission from a black hole. Let's see about that math problem. What class are you in?"

"Trigonometry and it baffles me completely. I'm hoping you can give me at least some small inkling about what it is."

"Okay, break out your book and your assignment and I'll see what I can do."

I spent a full, intoxicating hour with her. She was warm and friendly. She giggled a lot., but she wasn't stupid. She rapidly picked up on some of the simpler concepts and I felt we were making real progress.

All too soon, she said, "Well I have to go home before my parents start to worry. Can we do it again tomorrow?"

"I have to be at MIT tomorrow," I sadly replied, "and I won't be back until seven."

"Okay. Can I come over at seven?"

My heart almost stopped. "Yes, of course. Won't your parents object?" I gulped.

"Not if I tell them I'll be with you. They know you from the newspapers and the school paper. I don't expect any problems with them. After all, it's just math study, isn't it?"

"Yeah, study," I mumbled. "I'll walk you home."

"You don't have to. I'm sure I'll be alright."

"No, I want to, really. Come on, let's go."

She lived two blocks from my house. I never knew she was that close. When we got to her place she said, "Come on in. I think daddy's home. I want you to meet him."

Suddenly I was sweating again. I hadn't counted on meeting her folks.

"Daddy where are you?" she called.

"We're in the rec room," he replied.

She led me down the hall into the rec room. Her father stood up as soon as he saw me. He was massive at 6' 7" and about 235. He didn't appear to have any body fat. He stuck out a huge hand, "You must be Chester. We have read a lot about you and our daughter has told us about you too."

A much smaller woman was standing behind him almost hidden. "This is my wife." She stuck out a much smaller paw and I shook it. It was surprising, in a way, that he hadn't tried to crush my hand. I guess he was just so big and strong that he didn't need to demonstrate it. "I understand that you will be helping Cindy with her math. If there is anything we can do to help you, just let me know."

"Come on in the dinette," said Cindy. "I'll get us something to drink."

What a relief! I had met her parents and I didn't even faint.

"Daddy will do anything I want," declared Cindy. "He loves me. Mama can be a little sticky sometimes, but she loves me too. I have great parents!"

"Yeah, I like them," I said.

"That's good, because you'll be seeing a lot of them in the next few weeks."

"Why is that?" I puzzled.

"It'll take me at least that long to get this math thing down. Besides, I kind of like you. You're not like any of the other boys I know. They are always trying to kiss me and feel me up. I won't let 'em."

Her frankness startled me but I could easily embrace her honesty. She liked me! That was a long way from where I wanted to go but at least I wasn't a total reject. For the first time, I thought of myself as a sexual being.

She set the soda down in front of me and then sat next to me at the dinette table. "You are very shy, aren't you?" she asked.

"I don't get a chance to talk to anyone, especially girls very much. I don't know what to say when I do talk to them. I like talking to you though. Also, I don't have much time for people. I'm wrapped around my studies and my experiments."

"Don't you have a girlfriend?"

"No. I never thought that any of the girls I've seen around school would be interested in me. After all, I am kind of a nerd. You're the only really pretty girl I've ever talked to."

"I don't think you're a nerd. I think you are just very smart and kind of reclusive. Do you mean you've never been out on a date?"

"Yeah, I never have. In fact, except for mom, you're the only girl I have talked to for more than a minute or two."

"Would you like to go out? With me, I mean?"

I knew I was going too have a massive heart attack. Was this another of my fantasies? Was it real? I honestly didn't know. "Whhhaaaattt?" I stammered.

"Would you like to go out with me?" she repeated.

"The entire northern hemisphere would like to go out with you," I mumbled in shock. "Yes, yes, of course I would like to go out with you!" I knew I had come to one of those life changing moments. I didn't know how much it would change me, but I was fully aware that it would.

"Great! Where do you want to go?" she giggled.

"We could go to the movies and then to dinner. Or we could go to dinner and then I could show you my lab at MIT. Your choice," I replied.

Much to my surprise she said, "Let's go to your lab. I wanna see a mad scientist at work!"

All my dreams were coming true. I floated home on a cloud of Cindy vapor. The date was set for Saturday. I couldn't wait. The further we got into the week, the more nervous I became. My buddies noticed the change but they didn't say anything. That's life with MENSA.

Finally, Saturday plodded into being. I spent an hour in the shower. I wanted every pore on my body to be completely scrubbed. I put on my suit and tie and went to pick her up. I rented a car and driver for the occasion.

When I walked up to her door and rang the bell, her mother opened it and said, "Come in for a while. Cindy isn't quite ready yet."

I walked into the rec room and was greeted by her father. "Hi Chester," he grinned. "Taking my little girl out, huh?"

"Yes sir. I am just so lucky."

"She likes you son, take good care of her. Do you need any money?"

"No sir. I always have money of my own. I just never had any reason to spend it until now!"

Cindy walked into the rec room. Her father looked at her. I looked at her "Wow," we said in unison. She was even more beautiful than she was at school. She was wearing a grey and white ensemble that showed off her majestic curves. She was a goddess.

"Let's don't just stand there staring at me. Let's go." She said.

Her father winked at me as I escorted her out of the door and down to the waiting car. The driver opened the door for us and we clambered inside.

"This must have cost you a fortune!" she declared.

"Money means nothing. People are what counts. I would spend it all on a girl like you."

She scooted over next to me and kissed my cheek. My body went numb. No female, aside for my mother, had ever kissed me. She put my arm around her shoulders, snuggled up next to me and said, "There, that's better, isn't it?"

I couldn't breathe. This was the stuff dreams were made of. The chief nerd and the head cheerleader, who'd a thunk it? The driver headed for DeMarco's, the restaurant where I had made reservations.

"Be back in an hour and a half," I instructed the driver. We walked into the restaurant. It was crowded. I walked up to the entry clerk and said, "Reservations for Walker."

She summoned a waitress. "Right this way sir," she said and led us to a table in a little alcove. It was dark and quiet.

"Chester, you fox! I thought you had never been on a date before," Cindy grinned.

"I haven't. I've only read about how to treat a lady. I have never actually treated one before."

She giggled, "You are a quick study. I'll have to be careful around you."

"Oh, Cindy, I would never do anything sneaky or mean. You are my ideal woman. I could never hurt you or embarrass you."

A waitress arrived with the menus. "Something to drink?" she inquired.

"I don't drink alcohol," I told Cindy, "If you want something, go ahead."

"Trying to get me liquored up huh?" she joked, "I don't drink either."

"Do you have a non alcoholic drink menu?" I asked the waitress.

"Of course sir," she answered and hurried off. She was back in less than a minute with the menus. "I'll be right back," she said and steamed away.

"Oh Chester, everything is so expensive here. Why don't we just go get a hamburger?"

"On a first date? You've got to be kidding. Don't worry about money tonight. Just relax and have a good time. Do you see anything you want for dinner?"

She perused the menu and then said, "Why don't you order for me, please?"

The waitress reappeared. I ordered the drinks and she sped off to retrieve them.

When she returned, I ordered the Chateau Briand for two. We enjoyed a sumptuous meal, spent some time talking and getting to know each other. I couldn't believe how easy she was to talk to. We had another drink and then it was time to go.

Outside, our driver was just arriving, right on time. We boarded the car and I said to the driver, "MIT, please."

It was getting dark when we arrived. I had planned on a brief tour of my department and then take her home. "This is my lab," I explained.

"It looks almost like the one in your basement, only bigger. Do you really understand all this stuff?"

"Nobody really understands all of it. That's why we are engaged in theoretical research. You do have to understand the basic concepts and the math, but after that, it's a big wide open universe."

"How far along are you?" she asked again.

"I'll get my bachelor's degree the year after I graduate high school, then its grad school and finally a PhD."

"Why didn't you just graduate early from high school and go to college full time?"

"There was someone I just had to cling to in high school for as long as possible."

She dropped her head and said sadly, "Who would that be?"

I looked into the eyes I loved and whispered, "You. It was always you. I couldn't bear to be away from you. I knew it was impossible, but I just wanted to be where you are."

"Oh my god," she squeaked, "I can't believe it. I have always wanted to meet you and find out what you're really like. I had no idea that you were in love with me."

"Well, facts are facts," I said. "I can't escape these feelings and, now that I've met you, I can't escape from you. Even if we never get together, I'll probably always love you."

"I don't know if what I feel for you is love or not," she responded, "but I know that I have come to respect you. I think you are the most intelligent person I've ever met. It would be easy to be in love with you." She stood on her tip toes and kissed me full on the lips.

My knees wobbled and I had to hold on to the desk to keep from falling down. This was an entirely new experience for me. Theory and practice slammed together in one single cataclysmic event. It was magical. I took her into my arms and hugged her. She wrapped her arms around me a hugged me. For a moment, the universe stopped. I had reached a whole new plane of understanding that had nothing to do with academics.

"What now?" I groaned.

"Do you want to be my steady boyfriend?" she asked with a glimmer in her eyes.

"Well, sure. But what about all those guys that are hanging around you? What will your cheerleader friends think?"

"I don't care what the others say and I'll tell the boys that if they mess with you, they'll get to talk to daddy."

"So, do you want a ring or a necklace or a condo?" I asked.

She laughed and said, "No all I want is you."

I could live with that.