- Transgender & Crossdressers
- Weird but Awesome Day!
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A new national day as been voted. Everyone going out in public on July 14th has to be naked exceptions being workers for safety reasons. My friend Anita slept over at my apartment, I woke up to her naked in my room besides the bed. She was looking at me in the mirror, smiling.
"Good morning, Kate!"
"Good morning... why are you naked??"
"It's the 14th... and we're going out!"
"What! No way!"
I sit up keeping the blankets on my thighs and around my waist as I stare at her naked back. Her hands rubbing down her sides to her plump but firm butt cheeks. She turned swiftly facing me, her small perky breasts pushed outwards as the parade outside cheers loud.
"Get naked or I'll strip you down myself!" She says, a smirk on her face.
Her arms still behind her back, grabbing her butt cheeks, makes her breasts push out even more. She takes a step towards me, I grab onto the blankets, she takes another step. I grab my shirt and throw it on the floor, my DD breasts exposed.
"Here, happy!?"
"Almost..." She says pointing at the blankets.
"Nope. I'm not going there."
She grabs the blankets and swipe them off too fast for me to be able to react. Her eyes widen and her cheeks redden as she looks at my crotch. A very obvious and exposed seven-and-a-half inch erect penis pushing my panties. I try to cover it but her hands slap mine away.
"Wha- How!?" She asks.
"Don't look!"
"Kate, how do you have breasts and a dick!?"
"I was born like this! Can I please dress back up!?"
Her hand slowly inches towards my painfully erect penis. The soft fabric of my panties being the only thing between us, she stroked me with them.
"No... Stop..." I pleaded.
She pushed the panties to the side and started sucking on the head. Her tongue rubbed on and around the tip as she slid the head in and out slowly.
"Anita... No..."
She pulled away. "You say no but do nothing to stop me. Plus my body made you like that so it's only fair I deal with it, right!?"
She quickly starts sucking on me again, taking the whole dick this time. She bobs her head quickly along the shaft without gagging. I stare at her feeling an orgasm quickly build up when she stops.
"Let's make a deal. We don't go out... kinda. We go on the balcony and you fuck me there."
My cock pulses as she says the last phrase. "But... it's a glass balcony, people will see!"
She was out of the bedroom and on to the balcony, cheering like the thousands of people down in the street. I get out of bed and make my way to the livingroom where I look at her ass move from side to side. I rush outside and push into her ass, she screams as I quickly fuck her fat bottom. The unexpected sudden penetration making her squeeze on my hard shaft. I hug her tight and unload in her ass. She moans and looks back at me.
"That's done... Now back inside!"
"Wait! You had your fun, now it's my turn!"
She kneels in front of me and sucks me hard and fast, emptying all the cum from my cock and keeping me hard. I look down in the street and feel like panicking when I see how big the crowd is and the giant tv broadcasting in direct. Anita gets up and bends forward pulling on one of her pussylips.
"You're clean again, fuck me!"
My mind says no but my body says hell yes. I grab one of her hips and place the other on my erect member guiding it inside her. Once I push in I grab both her hips and start moving mine as Anita moans loud, very loud.
"Shh! They'll see us!"
Suddenly the crowd cheers loudly and Anita points down. I look at what she points and see myself fucking her on the giant tv. Anita keeps moaning and her pussy tightens around my cock, I slide my hands up to her breasts and lightly pinch her nipples as she arches her back.
"You're too tight Anny!"
"Harder! Harder!" She moans between her teeth.
I ram harder inside her and soon her body starts convulsing. The crowd cheers again as she cums. My breathe becomes heavy as she tries to catch hers. I move slower but still hard when she shifts her weight and make me pop out exposing my cock to everyone. She grabs it and strokes it quickly aiming up at her body still bent forward. I squeeze her butt cheeks as I cum, shooting up all across her tiny chest and belly. Again the crowd cheers before they switch to a different camera.
"I love this new national day!" Anita exclaims.
She stands up and faces me again, kissing each other.
- COMMENTS
Anonymousalmost 6 years agoYou know you are in trouble when the comment is longer than the story.
IrvingParkealmost 6 years agoYou've got a good idea here, but I have a few tips for you.
First, you need to do more world building. Why was this new national holiday declared? What happened to make it a holiday, and why? There would be a lot of objections to overcome if this were to happen in a world similar to ours, so are people still opposed to this idea of everyone being naked for a day, and if not, then what happened for the majority to approve of this? And if the majority DO approve of this, then surely trans and intersex people are seen in all their naked glory on this holiday, as well, so why would Kate be reluctant to participate? Does she oppose the holiday? Or is this perhaps the first year the holiday has taken place, so she doesn't know how people like her will be treated? Those kinds of details help the reader suspend their disbelief. Because right now, as it is, it's hard to believe this world exists. You just kinda tossed us into and said "this is how it is." Readers can't simply accept that, you have to explain WHY this is how it is.
Secondly, you need to do more character building. Kate and Anita are best friends, that much we know. But how long have they known each other? Two female best friends, and Anita didn't know that Kate is either trans or intersex? That doesn't seem very likely; female best friends confide just about everything in each other. So either they haven't known each other very well for very long, or there's a REALLY good reason for Kate not having divulged that information to her best friend for however many years they've known each other. Especially if they're having sleepovers, because if it's been a long time, you'd think Anita would have found out by accident or something well before now.
And finally -- and the other two points will help with this -- the whole thing is very rushed. Even for a quick one-shot story, it needs to play out a bit more. The way it reads now, it seems like "they did this, there's some dialog, that finished, then they did this, there's some dialog, that finished, then they moved onto the next thing." Erotic stories are all about making the acts taking place into a dramatic description of what's going on. And to your credit, you DID explore some of that, but it's just quick little snippets. You want to go into detail. What did Kate see? What did she hear? What did she feel? What's her emotional state in that moment? How is Anita reacting? How is Anita expressing herself physically? You don't even necessarily have to get poetic with it, just make it something that transports the reader to that place and makes them connect with the characters.
In other words, the better idea you can give the reader of what's it's like to be in that situation themselves, the more they'll enjoy the story. Yes, even sexy fun time stories.
Don't take this the wrong way, I just want to encourage you. I DO like your idea for the story. It's a cool premise, and you certainly have the concept well-established in your head. I wouldn't even say you should re-write this. I would leave it as-is so you can come back to it later and see how you've improved. And please, don't let the inevitable haters get you down (especially the one particular anonymous user here who craps all over everything because he has no original ideas himself and couldn't write an erotic story even if he had actually lived through one). Just keep writing, keep learning, and have fun.
