Westrons Pt. 31

WESTRONS Part 31

Themis and I saw each other again, of course. We still met at least once a month, with Kanitz and Tudino, to discuss military matters.

Kanitz was mostly worried with keeping costs down. She wanted us to reform and improve the army, but only if we could do it on a budget. Themis understood the military needs better, but her main concern was keeping the peace on our little committee.

It struck me as odd, the first few times, that I could feel that I truly loved both Kanitz and Themis - without feeling the need to act upon it. We'd been lovers, and I would always treasure those experiences. I didn't have serious regrets, and didn't confuse myself with second guesses.

It is what it is, as Isa said. And You can't go back, as I could attest to.

Tudino, on the other hand, was very much part of my present. She understood, immediately, what I was hoping to achieve. We butted heads, several times - she was remarkably stubborn - but there was no one who shared my interest in technical details to such a degree.

We agreed on the need for more rifles.

- "The Crolians may learn to adapt to your skirmishing tactics -" she said.

- "They will."

- "But we can create a new advantage if we equip even more of our soldiers with rifles. Accuracy, range ..."

I wanted a shorter barrel - under 30 inches - so that it could be loaded from the prone position. When a riflewoman rested the piece (instead of firing from the shoulder, while standing or kneeling), her accuracy improved tremendously.

Tudino favoured a longer barrel, which could be fitted with a bayonet.

- "Without it, they'd be practically defenceless at close quarters!" she argued.

But she also championed several clever innovations, such as a scrolled trigger guard, which would ensure a firmer grip than if it were smooth.

We met with a number of the capital's better known gunsmiths - all males, of course - and sought their advice. They told us that it was possible to create standard features, so that different gunsmiths could produce rifles more easily. Those weapons would also be more durable, and more dependable.

I also convinced Kanitz that the rifle units could be issued with two sizes of ammunition: a larger ball, which had to be carefully loaded (a time-consuming procedure), and a smaller ball. The second type could be used when the barrel of the rifle became fouled, but it could also be loaded much more quickly, by simply dropping it into the barrel.

This technique was much, much faster. It sacrificed accuracy, but increased the rate of fire, so that the rifles could keep up with muskets.

I remembered a few things about the Baker rifle, the weapon issued to British rifle units during the Napoleonic era - especially to the famous 95th rifles. Every so often, I tried to nudge development towards that standard.

In the back of my mind, I wondered if it was possible to create a breech-loading rifle. It could be quicker to reload, and the loading could easily be done from the prone position. I just couldn't remember how to marry a breech-loader with black powder propellant.

In the end, I just planted the idea in the heads of our gunsmiths, and hoped that one or more of them might come up with something.

Tudino and I were in full agreement, though, about who to train.

- "Young officers." she said.

- "Young NCOs. Corporals and promising privates, who will probably be sergeants by the time the Crolians are ready to try again."

- "Yes."

- "You know, I really enjoy working with you." I told her.

- "You said that yesterday." she said, with a grin.

- "Well ... I really do."

***

Koroba didn't invite me to her next hemmer. Or the one after that. In both cases, she told me in advance that she wouldn't be asking me to join her.

- "I hope you don't mind." she said.

I had to laugh. I had no claim on Koroba.

- "You make me feel old." I said. "It's like I'm your grandfather, and you're asking my permission." I was all of 35 years old.

- "You're not my grandfather!" she said. "My weird great-uncle, maybe ..."

- "Oh, there's a nice image."

- "Seriously, Cook. You know what I'm doing. And why."

"You belong to Isa, and to Esyle. And Tudino has a claim on you, too. Not to mention the lady by the sea."

Koroba knew very well who I'd gone to meet, in the royal hemmer cottage.

- "That's over." I said.

- "Maybe. Even so, that leaves me fourth or fifth in line - " She held up a hand when I began to answer. "I know, I know - it's not like that."

"But I can still enjoy your company, even while I'm looking for a male of my own. And if I don't find him right away, that doesn't mean I should stop trying."

- "You have to kiss a few pigs to find a prize hog." I said. What I'd wanted to say, of course, was 'You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a Prince' - but she wouldn't have known that story.

- "Kissing pigs?" She made a face. "I don't want to know that much about your past."

***

Tudino, on the other hand, reserved me six months in advance.

- "I want you to come to my next hemmer." she blurted out.

- "Already? You can't possibly -"

- "Not now. I mean, when I am."

- "Are you sure?"

- "Of course I'm sure! We wouldn't be talking about it at all if I wasn't." she said. "Now, don't say anything to Esyle until I get a chance to ask her myself."

***

- "Tudino was here." Esyle told me, the very next night. "She asked if she could have you for her next hemmer. Very thoughtful of her. I said yes, of course."

- "Thank you."

- "I know how you feel about her. And -"

- "And?"

- "Nothing."

-"You were about to say something else."

- "Just ... that your circle seems to be shrinking. Are you alright? I worry about you."

- "My circle?"

Esyle nodded. "You don't stay over at the Palace anymore, so you haven't seen Kanitz for some time. Or Tallia."

- "That's ... more complicated, sweet."

- "I know. But you haven't been with Koroba, either. And you turned down Colonel Neslann."

- "She didn't ask directly. She just ... hinted." Truth be told, I didn't want to start something new with Neslann when I still hadn't figured out my old relationships.

- "Still. Now it's only Tudino and me. And Isa. Plus the Princess."

I couldn't hide my shock. "You knew?"

- "No. You've been very discreet. Tallia figured it out."

- "How?"

- "Maia Simonia wasn't in the Palace when the Queen went into hemmer." (Maia Matila was pregnant again)

"Tallia asked Kanitz where she was. The Chancellor was ... evasive. Tallia knew that you were travelling. She asked Kanitz straight out if you were with the Princess."

- "Esyle - it was the first time ... since Tonol. We came together before ... before you. I didn't know she was a Princess. And then, when I found out ... I didn't think that I could tell you - or Tallia, because ..."

- "Politics. And the Princess was married. I understand." she said. "I'm glad that you told me, though." Something about the way she said that struck me as odd.

- "Wait - you didn't know."

- "No. Kanitz wouldn't admit anything. Tallia just guessed."

Amazing.

- "How much do you want to know?"

- "Whatever you want to tell me." said Esyle. She was being honest, too. Where Tallia had concealed her jealousy, Esyle had none. While her sister was competitive, and possessive, she only wanted a piece of me. A share, as she and Tallia had agreed in the very beginning.

She was also a true Westron, in the sense that she loved hearing about, and talking about sex. She actually wanted to know about my other lovers.

Esyle sat, cross-legged, on our bed, as I told her the story of Ensign Themis, and Tonol.

- "You loved her."

- "Very much." I admitted. "But once I found out who she was, I knew that we couldn't be. For many reasons."

"Until she told me that, once she'd had two or three children, we could meet again."

- "She loves you." Esyle's lips were slightly parted. To her, I think, this was some sort of romance novel, or a drama vid - a story of star-crossed lovers. Never mind that one of the characters was her lover.

- "She loves what we were." I said. "We both understand that, now. We had a wonderful moment, in the past. But there's no future for us. And our memories might have been better off if we hadn't tried to recapture that past."

- "That's so sad."

- "Bittersweet might be a better word."

After a short silence, she asked "Are you going to tell Tallia? Or should I?"

- "What do you think would be best?"

- "I'll tell her." said Esyle.

- "Thank you."

- "May I ask you something else?"

- "Something you don't already know?"

- "We discussed it before. You know that I would like another child. And ... tonight would be a good time ..."

Esyle was more passionate than usual. She was always warm, and caring, more attentive to my pleasure than her own. But this night she was intense, and demanding, and just a little bit wilder than I'd ever seen her before.

I made myself a promise to start telling her more stories.

***

Meeting Tudino for her hemmer felt ... just right.

- "I was a fool." she said. "We should have been together last year. I'm sorry."

- "We're here now. You have no idea how happy I am that we are."

- "You're the only one I want. I feel so lucky to have found you - how could I push you away?"

- "You're not pushing me away now."

- "No."

Tudino had put on a little weight. There was an extra four ounces or so on her hips, and a few more ounces in her little breasts. She was still lean, almost thin, her body a combination of whipcord and muscle, covered over with an exotic collection of scars.

But I absolutely adored her proud nipples, and paid them extra attention with my lips and tongue. Tudino must have decided to shed her customary reticence: her right hand lifted the hem of my kilt, and slid under it, to find my erection. She stroked me, even as she moaned into my ear.

We were both impatient to be fully joined. But Tudino would only get warmer and wetter as her hemmer progressed. So I wrestled her to the ground, and proceeded to tease her mercilessly.

- "Are you going to -? Ah! Cook - come on. Don't ..."

By the time I fastened my lips to her pussy, Tudino was fit to be tied.

"Ah! How could I not remember ... this?"

Her first orgasm was remarkably intense. She was silent for a few moments, trying to catch her breath.

We made love twice after that. I noticed her stump - and that was all. Both couplings were wonderful, and satisfied me right down to my toes.

Tudino's missing arm didn't bother me at all. I don't mean that I paid it any extra attention; I don't share that particular fetish. But it was, I think, a distraction for Tudino.

The first time she rode me, she placed her right hand on my chest, for balance - then she didn't seem to know what to do with her shortened left. She ended up tucking it behind her back. I think that she forgot about it, then. I hope that she did.

We rested for a bit. Neither of us spoke of it. I didn't want to spoil her mood, if she was concerned about it. There would be plenty of time to speak about her stump afterwards.

But it came to the fore much sooner than that. For our third bout, Tudino chose doggy style - only she had trouble almost immediately. On her knees, facing away from me, she put her right hand down - and then had no idea what to do with her left arm.

Fortunately, I saw her awkward movements, and guessed what was happening. I quickly pulled her upright (though still on her knees). I wrapped my arm around her, to hold her steady.

- "Try this." I suggested. In this position, I couldn't enter her easily, but I could - and did - kiss her neck and shoulder, while my free hand toyed with her nipples, and then slipped lower, between her legs.

"We have choices. I can sit on the edge of the bed, and you can sit on my lap, facing away. Or, you can go back to your knees, but instead of trying to balance on one arm, you could lower your head and bury it in the pillow."

"Or I can just continue to play with you, like this."

- "Cook ..." That didn't sound like a complaint, or a protest. I carried on.

- "Would you prefer that I choose?"

I gave her a moment to decide. She didn't express a preference. So I moved us to the edge of the bed. Tudino let me manhandle her into position, which I took to mean that she wasn't unwilling.

With her sitting on my lap, I had both hands free to fondle and caress her. She tucked my erection back inside her.

We stayed like that for some time, until I brought her to orgasm with my fingers. After that, Tudino wanted to repay the favour. She began to squirm about, until she found the right angle to slide herself up and down on me.

Her movements sped up, and I began to feel a sense of urgency as well. I manhandled her back onto the bed.

- "Head down!" I remembered to remind her, just before I slammed into her from behind.

If Tudino was self-conscious about her stump at that point, I wasn't aware of it.

***

Maybe it was just as Esyle had said: my circle was shrinking. Maybe the quantity was diminishing, but I certainly couldn't complain about the quality.

Being with Tudino was so right. I wouldn't have traded her for anyone else.

She dozed for a while, and I took advantage of the opportunity to look at her face. She was absolutely one of a kind. Even before the first of her many wounds, I doubt that anyone would have considered her beautiful.

Yet I thought she was spectacular. I was rapidly revising my list of the most beautiful Westron women - and Tudino was in a class by herself.

Her eyes opened.

- "What are you doing?" she asked, a little groggily.

- "Admiring your face." I said, truthfully.

She shook her head.

- "Why do you say things like that?"

- "Because it's true. I wish I'd been intelligent enough to realize just how beautiful you are - much sooner."

- "What are you talking about?"

- "Just accept the compliment, Tudino. That's all you have to do."

She mumbled something that sounded like "... lost your mind".

We had something to eat, and drank a glass of wine.

"You know, I don't think that position is one of my favourites anymore." she said. "I mean, it was exciting, for ... part of it. But having my face buried in a pillow ..."

"I much preferred sitting on your lap. Could we ... try that again - only, with me facing you, this time?"

That would still leave me with both hands free, to tweak her nipples, fondle her breasts, or to knead the cheeks of her fabulous little ass and stroke her dorsal fur.

- "That sounds like a wonderful idea."

***

Four days. Four whole days. She nearly killed me.

***

It still struck me as odd, after all my years with Westron females, how ... cool they were, a few days after their hemmer was over.

No lingering glances, no frequent touching. In some ways, it was just as if Tudino and I hadn't had sex 14 or 15 times, only a few weeks ago.

On the other hand, Westrons were never shy about discussing their sex lives. Tudino talked to Isa about it, then Koroba, then Esyle. The cook at the Belere probably heard the whole story, too.

Tisucha must've been told every last detail, too. She gave me a nod of approval over breakfast.

What a place.

***

After a day of meetings with Kanitz, Themis and Tallia, I was ready to head home with Isa and Koroba.

- "Can you stay, for a moment?" Tallia asked.

- "Of course."

Kanitz and Themis had already left the room. Tallia opened the door, to admit ... Senau.

He met my eye, and half-nodded, half-bowed.

- "I'll be right outside." said Tallia. She squeezed Senau's hand. Then she slipped out the door, and closed it behind her.

I wondered how I'd ever considered Senau more feminine than Isa. He was obviously more male. Ex-male.

- "Thank you. For giving me a moment, General." he said.

- "How can I help you?" I asked. I tried to keep my voice even.

- "I wish to apologize to you, General Cook." he said. "For ... for disturbing your household. I realize that my presence has been ... difficult, for you, and for members of your family."

The words sounded rehearsed, yet Senau seemed to be having trouble getting them out anyway. He was sweating, too. Was I that intimidating?

- "There's no need to apologize, Senau. You haven't done anything wrong."

- "Nonetheless."

I didn't know what else to say. Apparently, he didn't either.

"I will ... take my leave, then." he said. Senau turned, and walked to the door.

Tallia let him out, and then came back in.

I was still trying to figure out what had just happened.

- "Thank you." she said. "For listening."

Something finally clicked. "Tallia - is Senau shy?"

- "You couldn't tell?" she said. "He was really nervous about speaking to you alone."

- "All this time, I thought he was aloof. Distant. Are you telling me he's just shy?"

- "Painfully."

All the years I'd known him, I'd thought of Senau as Captain Aloof, the Gloomy Presence. Shy and nervous?

- "Tallia - he didn't need to apologize. He hasn't done anything wrong. I mean - I know that better than anyone."

Senau had changed for Tallia. It wasn't something he'd chosen to do, any more than Isa had made a conscious decision to change for me.

- "I know that." she said.

And then I understood what Tallia was doing.

- "Your family haven't been very nice to him." I said.

Talley was a grumpy old coot at the best of times, but he could (and did) say some hurtful things - especially after a few drinks. Tisucha wasn't much better, unfortunately. She doted on Isa, and remained close to Esyle, while she ignored Senau and treated her other daughter to barely disguised looks of disapproval.

- "You haven't, either." she said.

- "What? Me? I've never said a harsh word."

- "You've never had to." said Tallia. "My parents do it all for you."

Damn.

- "I don't disapprove, Tallia. I can't honestly say that I ever liked Senau - even before his Change. He always struck me as distant, and gloomy."

"But I understand the two of you - nobody could understand you better than me."

- "I know, Cook. But you never went out of your way to make him feel at home, did you?"

I had to think about that for a moment.

"In fact," she said, "you were nicer to that asshole Rance."

She was right, of course. Still, I wanted to argue. To justify myself. Because Senau took you away from me. Even as I thought it, I realized how stupid that sounded. I had Isa. I had Esyle. And Tudino.

A few years ago, I'd also had Koroba, Kanitz, and a little piece of Themis.

Tallia had a piece of me. Senau was the only one who was all hers.

And neither of them had chosen that. The Change had decided, for Isa and me, just as it had for Tallia and Senau.

I didn't like being compared to Talley, either.

- "I'm sorry. You're ... you're right. I could've ..."

- "You're outgoing, and confident, Cook. He's not. You can be generous, and kind, and considerate, with everybody - and Senau can only be that way for me."

"When we were together, you took charge. That was fine - I loved you. I still do. But Senau needs me. I'm the one in charge. Yet my family treat him like he's guilty of some crime, even while -"

She didn't need to finish that sentence. Even while they fawn over Isa.

It wasn't Isa's fault. But it wasn't Senau's fault, either. I could have made it easier for him - and for Tallia.

I felt like a complete shit.

- "Does Esyle know about this?" I asked.

- "We've had a few good talks, lately." said Tallia. "I love my sister. She's very perceptive."