What a Guy Won't Do

I love Jill Bergman. I have for about two years now. She is in my high school class and we will be graduating in another month. I have never told her that I love her, or much of anything for that matter. An occasional "Hi" or "What's going on?" is the most I had ever been able to say to her. I talked to her in class two months ago when we found out that we shared a birthday, that was our eighteenth and we celebrated with a high five.

One month ago is where my story begins. We were on our Senior Trip, which was about the lamest trip any school has ever put on. We went to camp! We spent three no-so-fun filled days and nights at Camp Totochawka, whose only claim to fame is that one of the "Massacre in the Pines" movies was shot there—I think they said it was part 5; you know the one that sucked the most. Anyway it was at this camp that I experienced a life altering moment.

Jill had gone in to take a shower, which I was totally aware of, as I have grown accustomed to watching her from afar. She was in what can only be described as a large port-a-john with a showerhead in it. There were several of these showers lined up and we had to wait our turns to get in them. Now along with being the worst diver on the school dive team I am also the worst videographer in my Media class. But I try. I was walking around with one of the school's video cameras taping anything that struck my fancy when I saw Jen Tyler and Martha Jensen laughing hysterically and running around the shower area. These two are a couple of bitches, but they're hot and seemed to be having a good time, so I started shooting them. When they saw me, they called me over and told me to stand in a particular spot and roll the camera. I am a constantly horny guy, so when annoying but cute girls tell me to do something, I do it!

My camera was trained on Jen who was standing in front of the showers. She stopped laughing long enough to look into my camera and said "And now for the classmate most likely to be humiliated . . . Jill Bergman!" And then she jumped out of frame as Martha pulled a rope. To my amazement the port-a-john shower collapsed and revealed Jill Bergman totally nude and covered with soap and water.

Her face was covered with soap and she was obviously caught off guard. It took her a moment to wash her face enough to see; and to give me plenty of time to view her nude front. I was mesmerized, I don't think I even understood what I was seeing at first. I stood there in shock looking through the camera eyepiece at the sight I had dreamt of for years. Many students had been walking by and they all stopped and applauded, whistled, laughed, and pointed at Jill. Cell phones were raised and held toward her grabbing videos of her from every angle.

Jill didn't make a sound, she stood there like a deer in headlights with one arm she covered her top and the other she covered her bottom. I tilted the camera away from my eye and looked at her. Her eyes found me and shocked me more than the moment itself. In her eyes all I saw was fear and confusion. Instead of being aroused all I felt was pity and a need to grab her, cover her and tell her it would be all right. Instead of being the hero I just stood there like a jerk. Mrs. Randolph saw all of this and grabbed Jill carting her off to privacy while the whistles and laughter continued.

I went back to my bunk and watched the tape again in the camera. I was ashamed of myself for watching it, but I couldn't help it. I needed to see her again. This time I was ready and I paused the tape.

I looked at her.

Jill was as amazing as I could ever have hoped. Her breasts were small but perfect. She had dark tiny nipples, her stomach was flat with an oval shaped bellybutton and the perfect V shape that lead to her vagina. She was groomed and tight. The sight of that ill-gotten image burned in me and aroused me like I have never experienced before. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't help it. Not only was Jill a great person, a talented artist, funny, smart, and kind, but she had a body that could put Playboy out of business.

I stared at the image before me for what seemed like forever, then finally I did the right thing, and I erased it. It almost killed me to do so, but I knew I had to for Jill.

Then I went into the shower and did the other thing I knew I had to do—masturbate! I jerked myself raw.

A little while later Jen and Martha were found out and taken away. Jill's hot naked wet body was the conversation for the rest of the trip. I didn't see her until three days after we got back. I was on my way home when she approached me.

Jill seemed different right away; she wasn't the pleasant and happy girl I had lusted after, but a direct woman on a mission.

"Hey, Mark," she said.

"Hi," I ingeniously replied.

"I know you didn't have anything to do with that joke they played on me, but you were there with a camera. I want to know if it was you that put that video on the Internet?"

"The Internet! No, of course not. I erased the tape completely and made sure it was erased before I returned the camera. I didn't even know it was on the Internet."

"I didn't think it was you. You seem too nice to do that, but I wanted to make sure. It looks like it was taken with a cell phone anyway." She said.

Jill started to look more like the nice girl I knew now that she had cleared me.

"Look, Jill, I'm sorry that happened to you. You must be pretty upset."

"You have no idea what it's like. Everybody's seen me naked. I mean EVERYBODY! The superintendent wants me to press charges, but I just want it to go away. They were just getting their rocks off tormented me like they have since I was a kid."

"Those 2 are the biggest bitches ever." I said.

She looked at me and smiled "Did you really erase the tape?"

"Of course. When I saw your expression it hurt me, you looked so lost, I just wanted to . . . I don't know help you in some way I guess." I said.

"You're sweet, Mark. But you can't really help me. That can never be taken back. My own brother saw the video for God's sake!"

"Yeah, but still at the end of the day it's just nudity. It's not like you have something nobody saw before, right? It's really not that big of a deal"

I shouldn't have said that!

Jill looked at me with a new expression. "Are you serious? Do you have any idea how humiliating that was. Do you know what it feels like to be violated like that? To know that there is no mystery anymore, that every square inch of my naked body has been seen by over 7300 people and counting online and even though I reported it they still haven't taken it off yet?"

"No, but I mean . . . well don't take this the wrong way, but . . . Jill, you have a great body. When people see it, they like what they see. Nobody is laughing at you; they are kind of worshipping you. I know that sounds stupid but it's true. There isn't a guy in the world who would see your body and not fall in love with it instantly." I said in all sincerity, but again, I should have just shut up!

Her eyes watered up and she turned away. She sobbed a couple of times before I saw my opportunity to be human. I put my arm around her and tried to comfort her. She turned her face into my chest and cried. I rubbed her back and rocked her back and forth. Keep in mind, I'm eighteen and a guy therefore everything in the world arouses me. Even though a girl I genuinely cared about was crying and sad I still couldn't help picture her nude, those perfect breasts were now pressing against me, and her beautiful golden hair smelled wonderful under my nose. I leaned forward and kissed the top of her head. I had a hard-on of course, but was gentleman enough to hold my hip away from her—perhaps I was maturing!

And then she said the words that haunted me for the next 24 hours.

"I'm so embarrassed and nobody understands." She really broke down then and my soul hurt for her.

She eventually got herself together and thanked me. She thanked me for erasing the tape, for consoling her and even for trying to understand. I felt like the biggest douchebag in the universe. I regretted watching that tape. I was as guilty as everyone else for making her feel like this.

That night instead of jerking off as usual, I simply lay in bed staring up into the dark and I kept replaying that statement over and over in my head—"Nobody understands"

The next day school was ended and we had our final dive meet. Like I said before I sucked at diving, but I signed up for it and had to see it through. We were the worst team in the history of high school diving, but hey somebody has to be dead last!

As I was waiting for my final dive of the year and hopefully ever, I looked out into the spectator bleachers and saw quite a few people. My family was there, a few friends, teachers, etc. etc. but most importantly Jill was there. She was sitting next to her friend Tina. I watched her with the usual amount of love in my eyes and even though she looked happy as usual, I felt that part of her was different. I felt terrible that she had changed especially since it wasn't her choice, but what could I do? Like she said "Nobody understands"

At this point I realize what was about to happen in my story seems inevitable, but it didn't seem that way at the time.

I was next; I stripped down to my Speedo (talk about embarrassing) and climbed the ladder. On the way up all I could hear in my head was Jill saying "Nobody understands" it was on a loop like when you get a song stuck in your head that you can't get out.

I got to the top and walked to the edge of the springboard. I took my stance, prepared for what I knew would be a terrible dive and jumped. As I fell through the air in what seemed like very slow motion a thought occurred to me. I totally lost focus on my dive and hit the water with clumsiness only a circus clown should be capable of. As the cool water enveloped me and the bubbles covered me in their sizzling sounds I knew what I had to do, not just for Jill, not just for justice, but for understanding, for equality, for the American way of right and wrong.

As I spun under water in a fetal position I reached down and pulled off my Speedo and dropped it to the bottom of the pool.

I swam to the other side of the pool where the spectators were and with a smoothness I rarely achieve I surfaced and pulled myself out of the water and onto my feet. I stood up completely nude in front of everyone!

I feigned ignorance to my nudity and began walking in front of the crowd. A collective GASP followed by laughter took hold of everyone. I couldn't face my mom, but I did hear her yell "Oh no!" after that I tried not to think of my family. I did however look to the crowd pretending to wonder what all the fuss was. I saw many cell phones pointed at me and realized within minutes my nude body would be all over the Internet and since I was a guy I wouldn't find the same level of sympathy Jill had gotten! Then I saw her; Jill was sitting there with her hands over her mouth and her eyes wide. She was now looking at me the way I had looked at her. I thought of her wet naked body glistening in the morning sun, how perky her boobs were and that wondrous V shape that lead to the thing men desire most of all.

Jill was now staring at my nude penis swaying in the wind brightly lit by the light of day along with about a hundred other people!

I began to get aroused and realized I couldn't pretend much longer. I started feeling all the eyes staring at me, I heard the laughter, and I started to feel more self-conscious than I had ever begun to imagine. I was getting erect. My penis began to stiffen fast and I felt my balls slap into the sides of my legs as I walked. Somehow that brought me out of this dreamlike state I was in and brought in a harsh reality. I honestly think I began in that moment to understand how Jill felt and how women in general feel when they are treated like an object. I don't want to get overly philosophical, but I began to understand.

At this point I freaked out a little and "realized" I was naked. I looked down and saw my dick sticking straight up at me. I covered my hard cock with my hands and the laughter of the crowd increased ten-fold. I saw Mrs. Jenkins running toward me with a towel and I ran to her. She wrapped the towel around me and I thanked her. Then I let go and the towel fell off again giving the audience the perfect view of my naked ass they didn't see before, only this time it wasn't on purpose! I was truly embarrassed.

I ran into the locker room and sat on the bench by myself. I listened to the excitement of the crowd die down as the meet continued. I looked down at the tent my boner was making in the towel and realized that at that very moment my penis—my hard throbbing cock--the one only I had seen before (yup, I'm a virgin) was at that very moment going global on the information super highway!

My heart was racing, I was breathing fast, and a multitude of butterflies filled my stomach. My hands were shaking and I finally started to come down from my erotic high.

I just exposed my nude body to the world!

I sat there with my thoughts (which were all over the place) and finally showered and got dressed. I left before the meet was over. I couldn't face anyone at that moment. I snuck out the door when I thought nobody was looking and started for home.

"Mark!" Jill said running toward me. Her smile was as stunning as ever and her eyes had all the wideness of a child at Christmas. "Was that for me?" she asked.

I started to shake my head no and play it cool, but I couldn't. "You said nobody understands. I wanted to understand."

She leaned forward and kissed me on the lips. My penis immediately rose again and my heart ached for her.

"You are amazing," she said and boy could I tell she meant it. "I can't believe you did that for me."

"I would do anything for you." I said.

Jill smiled a devilish smile and said "Oh really? Well then, will you show me again?"

"I'll show you mine if you show me yours!" I replied—I'm really clever sometimes!

She took my hand and we headed home; toward the sunset I'd like to add.

What a guy won't do for a beautiful girl!