What Kind of Man I Am Ch. 07

Hey Fuckers!

This story ain't over till I say it's over!

And there will be music!

"All aboard! Ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaa!

Ay, Ay, Ay, Ay, Ay, Ay"

And there will be mistakes! But are you not entertained?

- I enjoy feedback, comments, and constructive criticism. Feel free to drop me a note. Especially a real bad grammar mistake! I am curious as to how old you are as the reader and if your a woman or man. If you read one of the stories and you did something from it, good or bad let me know! One guy told me he bought cologne! I'm dying to know what happened! Or if you ended up having a discussion on anal from reading chapter 4 with your wife or husband. Or maybe you did therapy videos when you divorced!

The Cast:

Chip - the husband

Joan - the wife

Michele/Chel - daughter

Kixx - son

Matty- Chip's best friend

Jacy- Matty's girlfriend

Laura- Joan's best friend

Monica- Matty's neighbor

Tiffany- Works at Macy's cologne counter

Carrie- Buyer that works for Chip.

Theresa- Mom of Chel's friend Jessica

Kimberly- works for Chip,

Lori- works for Chip. Tall redhead.

Diane-?

Sound effects advisor- Blackrandl1958

Editing help- Dale.

On Sunday Chip found the divorce papers and that his wife was taking a cruise in October with her friend. Joan committed to talking with Chip, but he thinks this is just another lie. He struggles every day waiting for divorce day.

Redo1984

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Tuesday August 22, 2017

I woke up in a funky mood. Nothing felt right with me physically or mentally. I stumbled around getting ready for work in a quiet house. When I zipped up my pants, I realized I didn't have underwear on. Oh well.

I was walking softly by the kids' room and I dropped my phone and wallet. Shit! At least the kids have been enjoying sleeping in. That's about to end.

When I was Kixx's age, I played baseball and went to the pool everyday. Stared at the girls in bikinis, just like that movie The Sandlot. Well, it really didn't matter what kind of swimsuit they wore. I was just amazed how attractive girls were. A simpler time. I miss those days.

I started up the Jeep. I sat there and zoned out for awhile. You know, It kinda feels like I woke up late and missed my final exam.

What is it really? Maybe it's the feeling of being in limbo? Melancholy? Lonely? All of the above? Waiting for someone to tell you how they feel when you already know how they feel?

Should I practice what I preach? I have with Joan, except with her wanting a divorce. But I haven't heard that from her lips. Awe crap. This is exhausting and I don't want to think about it!

Okay, let's meditate our way out of this fuck hole. What's important? My kids. Are they in a good place? Mostly. I have reassured and loved them to the best of my ability. I take care of their needs and help develop them for the future. Even to the point of making up the slack for Joan. I have a place for them to live and would take full custody with no hesitation.

What else is important? To be healthy and happy. Are you? Fuck no. Why? I have very little physical intimacy with my wife, not even hugs and kisses anymore. That really hurts. Hell, she doesn't even talk to me. Set that aside for now.

What about work? Happy, but distracted with Carrie.

I could talk to her about it. Okay?

What about when I'm not working? I'm happy, but distracted by Tiffany, Theresa and Monica. Why?

The root of the problem is not just being horny. The lack of any closeness with Joan is. So? I seem to be reaching elsewhere to find it. Ah hah! Now what do I do with this knowledge? Good question.

How do all these amazing women know somethings up. Are they interested in me or do they just care about me. I have no fucking idea. So? Fuck, this is going no where. You're an idiot. Get drunk, get laid, and get fucked!

Chip! Calm down. You have 9 days to go. You can make it 9 more days without sex. You have made it a month. Be happy. Listen to music. Get in shape. Go to Vegas and have fun.

I need a fucking hobby! Sigh.

Just do the best you can every day. You're human. You can't make people tell you how they feel. That's on them. Don't do the old Chip shit, sucking it up and soldier on. Go full throttle baby. Okay, maybe not full. Maybe 50% to start.

So rock out with you cock out! Hmmm, maybe that's not a good slogan for right now.

Why is everything so difficult!

Let's go to work dammit. I turn on the radio.

"Well alright, somnthins' got you going tonight. Doin' all she can, it's alright."

Okay. I need to turn this up.

"I like to rock, some like it hot, baby."

Shit, almost missed my turn. That song was kickin'. Oh yeah, another solid tune.

"City nights. Summer breezes makes you fell all right."

Now this is putting me in a much better mood.

"See the girls with the dresses so tight!"

That was some awesome retro. Late 70's? Aldo Nova and April Wine. Yeah baby! Be careful, feeling good usually means I do something stupid.

Now I have a rock n' roll buzz. What the fuck would I do at a concert and if I was single? Shit, I haven't been to a concert in over ten years. At least one that I would have picked! Make a note to see if Def Leppard and AC/DC are touring.

Shit. I need caffeine. Seven eleven, yes!

I grabbed a Monster. Disaster averted.

I parked and looked for the last cologne to test. Gucci Guilty it is. Alright ladies, let's finish this.

At least I was in a much better mood, but definitely still had some angst and a need for a physical release. Check your self before you wreck your self!

I walked in and noticed I was the first one in for my team. Before long Carrie made her way into my office.

"Hi ya' Chip."

"What up Care Bear?"

Dear god. She was wearing a sexy skirt and a white, form fitting top that the only word that came to mind was 3D. Where are my special glasses? It buttoned up. It looked familiar. My desk fantasy shirt? Pretty damn close. Check yourself!

"Just seein' how your doin'." she said.

"I'm okay. Hey? Have a seat please." I asked.

"Am I in trouble?" she said with a smirk.

"Not at all. Shit. Umm. Okay. I just wanted to say that I have been dealing some stressful personal issues. That's why I have been up and down. You have actually been very helpful not letting me dwell on it here at work. But, can we dial things down a bit for the next couple of weeks, so I can figure things out. You're an amazing and beautiful woman. I rely on you so much. You kick ass and were a good team. I don't want to screw that up. Sometimes my mouth gets away from me. I don't want to be in that position. I'm rambling. Fuck. I'm sorry if I have said anything to screw up what we have as far as our work mojo."

Sigh. Oh crap. She looks sad.

"Chip. I know your dealing with something. I can literally feel it, most the team can. It makes me sad that a wonderful man and friend is in turmoil. You don't need to apologize. I would tell you straight out if you pissed me off or disrespected me, you know that." She said and paused before continuing.

"I'm glad you're trying to take care of yourself. All the changes. I know it helps you cope, but you deserve to be happy too. Yes we can dial it down. It's not nearly as fun though. If you ever want to talk? Just let me know. Okay?" she asked and smiled.

"Thanks Carrie. I might."

She stood up.

"Since I'm not in trouble, which is very disappointing. I even wore the prefect panties for spanking." she said.

I didn't say anything. Check yourself. Get spanking and oral sex out of your head. She got up and was not looking at me. If she stretches in that top, I'm a fucking goner. She walked to the door. Close call.

"Chip. One more thing before we dial it down."

Wait for it.

"When I close my eyes, I still dream about you as country. I dressed up in all white just for you today."

Is she teasing me with some Night Ranger? That tight ass top made me think of "Coming of Age."

"Dressed to kill and lookin' dynamite, with her high laced-stockings and her sweater so tight!"

"You look fantastic Carrie." I said.

She smiled and walked out.

Lunch time. I started thinking about an album to listen to. What about Tesla. Mostly energy rock, right? I took my dress shirt off and put on the gloves. I started working the bag in just my T-shirt. I really need to look up some videos to use this bag properly.

"Its getting better now."

After the bag work, I sat down and had a salad, sunflower seeds and some pineapple.

"Cause I'm a cowboy of the modern day."

Okay, so maybe not the best choice. Lot of songs that stirred up emotion in me. Album was a roller coaster for me.

I cleaned up my desk and started putting on my shirt. Carrie comes right in with her impeccable timing.

"Damn. I just missed the good part. Oooh! Maybe not?" she said.

She came right over to me and smelled my neck. Working out had heated me up and even I could smell the Guilty.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Guilty." I said.

"Really. Mmmmm. Let's be guilty..." she started.

"Carrie!" I groaned.

"Sorry. I'm starting to think you're always going to smell good to me, no matter what you have on. "

She put her hands on my chest.

"I want to... Oh shoot! I hate dialing it down. So many things I want to say." she said.

She shook, shimmied and stamped her foot. My eyes went right to the big time shimmy action. Busted! She growled at me, in a real nice way. Then turned and left. Whew!

Carrie must of said something to the rest of the team. Every 30 minutes one of my ladies would come in and give me a hug. Jake came in last.

"Hey Boss. I did not come in to hug you." said Jake.

"That's good. I still love you man."

We both chuckled. I walked over to him and held out my hand. We shook hands.

"You need anything from me? Hey. Nice punching bag."

"Nope. Your doing a great job Jake. Ah yeah. Helps me get focused for the afternoon."

"Really?" he was asked.

"It was only $150. I have another one at home."

"Cool. Okay, talk to you later." he said.

Once I was alone again, I jumped into working on projections and put in an hour on my presentation. We really need to change the cash register fixtures. Before I new it was time to go.

I was home at 5:30 and the house was empty. I did my quick change and headed to the gym. I worked hard again, taking almost an hour and half to complete the work out. I arrived home at 7pm.

Joan was working with a stack of papers and her computer at the kitchen table.

"Dad. Can you make your meatballs for dinner?" Kixx said as he cane into the kitchen sliding on his socks.

"Sounds good. I'll get right on it. Spaghetti and meatballs. Did you do your sit ups today?

"Yep. Every day."

Fist bump.

"Where's Chel?"

"In her room?"

The shower will have to wait. I washed my hands and made the meatballs. I popped them in the oven and set the timer.

"I'm am going to grab a shower and then I'll start the pasta." I said.

"Mmm hhhmmm." said Joan.

She didn't even look up.

I hoped in the shower. No time for funny business. I soaked for about 5 minutes. What should I do tonight, if the kids blaze on me after dinner? I don't want to go out. But I don't want to stay in. Hmmm. I was drying off and my mind went to the Vegas trip.

I texted Matty soon as I was dressed.

"What kind of cloths are you taking for the trip."

"Jacy has that covered for me. Oh. She was going to get you some too. Let me ask if she did." he replied.

"I need to finish cooking, let me know later."

Let me check on Chip's big meaty balls. Looking good. I started some water for the pasta. Wow. I have been making these meat balls for 10 years now. All because we ran out of bread crumbs one time and I used Rice Krispies cereal. The kids were so little then. Four and six years old. Just little peanuts.

Back to my plans for tonight. I could start researching muscle car prices. If I had a car, I could go out and jam to some tunes. Drop the clutch and do a smoke show. Race that tool bag I see in the neighborhood with the yellow Mustang? Maybe once I get settled after the big D.

You know, I could join a Jeep club. Have to look into that later. I could drive the Jeep and hit DQ tonight. Look it's the creepy guy at DQ by himself! Okay, I could ask Theresa? But that would be a second date. I wouldn't trust myself alone in a car with her.

Fuck. No dating Chip!

Strip club? Nah. Not by myself. I could ask Carrie. Stop being goofy. But she would go. I'm pretty sure?

I could go to the bookstore. If there is any left nearby? The book and the coffee has merit, I must say.

"ALRIGHT GUYS. FOOD IS READY!" I yelled.

"Really Chip?" said Joan grimacing.

"What?" I said.

Dinner was wrapping up and I needed to know who is doing what.

"So what are you kids doing tonight?" I asked.

"Going to Jack's if that's okay?" said Kixx.

"No problem. Home by 1030. Text me please."

He jumped from his chair. Fist bump.

"Bye!" he said.

"What about you Chel? My favorite daughter."

"Nice Daddy. I was going over to Becky's. 11?"

"Okay. Done! Text me. No boyfriends."

She smiled.

"I don't have one yet. Bye Daddy."

"Excellent! A worry free night." I said.

I cleaned up the dishes and decided the bookstore was happening.

"Hey Hon. Stepping out to the bookstore. Be back in awhile."

"Mmmmm. Okay."

I went to the bathroom. Checked my hair. I had some shorts and sandals on. My shirt was one of my favorites. Once in the Jeep, I pulled out my phone. Went into Maps and typed in Barnes and Noble. Okay. There is one! Twenty minute drive is fine with me.

Turn on the radio. Awe shit, a ballad. I like Poison. But "Every Rose" is not what I'm looking for. I rode it out on low volume. My radio flashed Genesis. Now were talking.

"I can't see you mama, But I can hardly wait. Oh to touch and to feel you mama."

Love singing to this song.

"Your taking away my last chance. Don't take it away. can't you feel my heart?"

As I listening, my phone flashes. Looks like a text back from Matty. I'll have to check it later.

There's the Nobile.

I walked into the store and headed for the magazines. There we go. Muscle car price guide. And a Jeep magazine too! I'll take that thank you. Cool. What about das' book? I could use a good sci-fi or fantasy fix to get me through September.

Oh, twelve o'clock, hello miss yoga pants. Looking very lovely tonight. Cute ponytail. She turned around abruptly while I was checking her out.

Shit. Deploy counter measures. I flash her a smile.

"Hi." she said as she smiled back.

"Hi."

I wanted to look back. But I was sure I would be busted. I still looked. Yep she saw me. Dammit. Can't a guy just admire a woman's behind more than once anymore!

I wandered around and found the sci-fi section. What I need is someone to recommend a book that they have read so I don't have to search. Your so fucking lazy. You can't find a book?

A Plague of Giants. Looks interesting. I can read a little and see if it's my juice or not. Oh. Coffee. I made a beeline for the Starbucks.

I ordered a chai instead. Is there caffeine in chai tea? Purchase completed, I headed to find a comfy chair. There's my future girlfriend making another pass by.

"You're a quick shopper." she said as she grinned.

"That I am. The book, I'm gonna take for test drive and drink my chai. I kinda know my way around stores. What are looking for?"

"Just a present for friend. She loves books. She's sick at home and wants a good book."

"What kind of books?" I asked.

"She likes mystery, drama, a little romance mixed in."

"Not quite in my wheel house. But, a lot of movies are based off of books that are much better. And that is in my sweet spot.

I liked the Divergent movies. The Girl on the Train was eh, but I heard the book was really good."

"Thanks ah..."

"Chip. Your welcome."

"Diane."

"Nice to meet you. If you need further assistance, I will be over there."

"Great. I may."

That is a lovely arse! She was super cute. Probably a serial killer. Picking up dudes at the Barnes and Noble and then stuffs them in a freezer. I slipped into a cozy chair and sipped my chai. I cracked open the book and started reading.

Five minutes in, Diane appeared in front of me with a book in her hands. I found my self staring eye level at her camel toe in those tight pants.

Oh my god! Keep you mouth closed!

"I found one. I hope she likes it."

"What did you get?" I asked and stood up.

"The Divergent. I liked that movie as well."

"Great. You could get her a coffee to go with it." I said.

"Mmmmm. Great idea! You really saved me from stressing and walking out with nothing. Thank you." she said.

"I like doing that for pretty girls."

"Oh. What does your wife think about that."

"She doesn't really care. It's complicated. It's about to get less complicated by 50%. Hence, finding a fun hobby to meet people once I start, you know, over."

I picked up the magazines and smirked.

"Hmmmm. Cars. You looking to meet guys?" she asked

She smirked.

"Hey now. I can always use another friend. Specially if your going to drop a tranny."

She looked at me weird. Like I was a serial killer.

"Transmission. Sorry." I clarified.

She smiled and wiped her forehead.

"Phew." she said.

"Pretty girls with pony tails like Jeeps too!" I said.

"Just pretty?"

"I thought that was safe way to go."

"Try again." she smiled.

"Hot and beautiful girls with pony tails like Jeeps and Challengers too."

She smiled.

"Much better. What's a Challenger?" she asked?

I flipped through the magazine and showed her a 1970 Gloss Black Challenger.

"Very masculine." she said.

"No. That is a very sexy car. She's beautiful on the outside and the inside."

"She was a sex machine, she kept her motor clean."

"Yeah buddy. Get her in a Challenger with the pistol grip shifter. She can grab my pistol shifter! Ease the seat back. between my legs. Yoga me baby!"

"Okay. I'll give you that. Well, I better get going." she said.

She waved the book in her hand. Then she bit her lip and stood there. She went into her little purse and pulled out a pen.

"Can I see your magazine?" she asked.

"Sure."

She was writing in it, on the Challenger page and handed it back to me.

"You better buy this! I don't want some strange guy calling me." she said.

"Mmm. Fair warning. It might be over a month before I call. I'm in the middle of the complicated part."

"No worries. Thanks for telling me, uh Mr. September." she said.

"Your welcome. I'm glad I came to the book store tonight. So, Hypothetically? If I did something with a Jeep club, four wheeling, drinking and having fun. Is that something a hot and beautiful girl with a ponytail would be down for?"

"Mmmm. You'll have to ask when you call one Chip. Have a good night."

She turned and left. Of course I watched her ass jiggle and thought of hot sex in a tent.

What the fuck just happened. I'm not that good looking. I say stupid shit all the time.

Okay. So I'm tan and a little muscular. The shirt looks good on me and I smell good. I would still rate myself a seven at best. At fucking best! More like a six and seven eighths.

Don't mess with a streak Chip. Everyone knows that. I opened the magazine. There it is.

"Diane. Hot girl with the pony tail!"

Heh heh. I like her.

What time is it? It was already after 9 and I still have to drive home. I headed for the checkout and paid for my goodies. Not risking fate, I put Diane's number in my cell before I left the parking lot.

"A little ditty 'bout Chip and Diane. Two American kids growing up in the heartland."

I put my phone on the charger and remembered Matty had texted me.