When It's Gone

"Can I make you another cranberry and vodka, ma'am?" The cute Puerto Rican smiled brightly and flirted lightly with the obviously sad woman. As much as he wanted to be the one to comfort her, he wanted to get a bigger tip even more. His deep brown eyes tried to bore into her soft, shy ones but clearly whoever she was supposed to be meeting was more than just a dinner date. She averted his flirtatious gaze and looked down at the pile of napkins she had ripped into tiny pieces in a pile in front of her.

"No, thank you. I'll just pay my tab." Marlene clicked her tongue and chuckled softly. She tried not to sound bitter or angry as she responded. It wasn't the bartender's fault that Warren was almost 1½ hours late with not so much as a phone call or even a text to tell her why or when he might grace her with his presence. She fought back the tears that threatened to spill over the brim of her eyes and down her finely painted face. The bartender handed her the bill and without even looking, she handed him a $20 and stood up to leave.

"Keep the change," she said without looking at him, checking her phone one more time to see if she missed a call or a text. Of course, she hadn't.

"Are you sure, ma'am? The drink is only $6." He thought it was weird that in the whole time she was sitting there, he hadn't learned anything about her, not even her name. She seemed reluctant to try to focus on anything or anyone besides her dinner date. Whoever they were, they had better count themselves lucky to have such a devoted woman.

She smiled at him briefly and walked out, feeling the tears finally escape. She was almost at the valet stand when a hand slipped out and grabbed her by the elbow, turning her around.

"So, were you just going to leave me alone on our anniversary?"

There he was, the man of the hour, or almost 2 hours as it were. Warren Slayton smiled that mega-white smile and all of Marlene wanted to go limp. Standing 6'3, he was the type of man to make just a towel look good not to talk of his suit that was especially tailored-made for him. He always smelled of Givenchy, a scent he had fallen in love with after Marlene gave it to him for his 18th birthday. His dirty blond hair, light grey eyes, deep dimples and hint of a goatee were enough to melt just about woman. That is, if that woman hadn't gotten all dolled up, something she didn't do unless it was a special occasion, just to sit at the bar of one of the most expensive restaurants in town waiting for him.

He kissed her cheek softly, "Baby, you look amazing."

She did, even she had to admit it. Her skin was so beautifully black that it looked like it had a permanent sheen to it. When he first met her in middle school, she was so embarrassed by it it took him almost 3 months to get her to say more than "hi" to him in the hallways. Her dark brown eyes which were surrounded by the softest eye lashes he had ever seen were nicely and tastefully done in gold and light brown to compliment her skin. Her deliciously full lips had the slightest hint of gloss of them (because no lipstick color could ever match the natural color she had). Her hair, which she normally wore in an afro or other natural styles, was straightened and cut into layers with soft highlights which made her dark skin somehow glow even more. Her golden dress was so tight and so short, even she was surprised she wore it but it was such an opposing color to the rest of her body that nothing else would have looked as good. At 5'1, her 3-inch heels still had her just eye-level to his broad chest, which made him feel even greater when he had to bend down to kiss her. Even the tears that ran down her face couldn't detract from her beauty. In a word, she looked and felt amazing.

"Thanks," she mumbled and turned back to walk towards the valet as Warren reached out to grab her again.

"Where are you going? I thought we were supposed to have dinner together." His grey eyes turned darker as he gave her his best rejected look. His brash and quite frankly selfish look inflamed her fury even more.

"We were," she said angrily, snatching her arm back, "two hours ago. I called you, texted you, and got nothing! Do you know how much of a fool I felt, waiting for you, hoping that you actually cared more about me than yourself?! And now you have the audacity-"

She couldn't even speak anymore. She literally felt like she was going to choke on her rage.

"Babe, I got caught up in a meeting. I wanted to try to let you know something but we were so engrossed in getting the deal hammered out, we forgot about the time. I'm sorry." Warren spoke to her in a soft, even tone, something he only did when he was lying. He thought it was his "sincere" voice but after being married to him to him for so long, Marlene knew it was just an act.

"Is that right?" she chuckled derisively. She wanted to slap the taste out of his mouth with every fiber of her being but she rethought it considering how much larger he was than her and the fact that they were in public. "Well, next time when you're "hammering away at your meeting", be careful of what type of lipstick she wears. She left some on your collar. Good night."

She turned and walked away at his stunned silence, getting her keys in order to start the long and dreadful ride home.

............................................................................

It was almost 8 a.m. before Marlene finally came through the door of the home she shared with Warren. The night before had been such a nightmare that she hadn't wanted to go back. So instead she opted for a hotel room downtown. Although they had a strict credit-card only policy, they gave Mrs. Slayton an exception. She paid with cash and asked not be disturbed by anyone for any reason, especially if any gentlemen came looking for her. With that she retired to her room, where she crumpled down to the floor right inside of the door as the reality of her deceitful marriage consumed her.

She was relieved to hear absolute silence as she padded inside quietly, wanting so badly to not have to confront Warren so early in the morning. She carried her beautiful golden dress and heels in a Wal-Mart bag as that was the only place open late enough for her to buy some more comfortable digs after hours of wallowing in her misery. Her sweatpants, T-shirt and flip-flops reminded her of the life she left behind when Warren became a powerful broker. He harshly rebuked her choice of wares, telling her that it wasn't proper for a "women of her stature" prance around in the house in clothes like those. They were dressed immaculately 24/7, in case of visitors. But she wasn't a woman trying to impress, she was a woman of comfort and that was what Warren once loved about her. But as he became richer and more powerful, his likes changed dramatically as did his promises to remain faithful to his wife. So, Marlene said "screw it" and wore what she felt best in, ignoring Warren's wishes the way he did hers.

But as the years drug on, the affairs become so rampant and so numerous that Marlene had stopped sleeping with him. She was deathly afraid of catching something from him, something they'd never spoken about was a real reality in their situation. She told herself that she was his true queen, that the women came and went like ships in the night. Even late at night, as she sat on the couch watching stupid movies waiting in vain for him to come home, she tried to cling to the hope that maybe in the midst of one of his affairs he'd see how much he was hurting his wife and he'd turn back to her. It had been almost 6 years since she learned of his first tryst with a young woman who lived down their block. And after 6 years, she'd finally decided to stop living like a fool and realize, that the Warren she once loved was gone, and she couldn't stay married to the unfaithful one that had taken his place, despite his money and success. That's not why she married him and it wasn't what would make her stay. She had just begun climbing the stairs when his voice stopped her cold.

"Where have you been all night? I called you about 25 times. I even found your car's GPS but when I got there, you were nowhere near it. I called the cops and they said you had to be missing for 48 hours if there were no signs of foul play." He stood at the bottom of the stairs shirtless, standing in athletic pants and his running shoes. His tan skin and golden hair glistened with sweat, evidence of his recent run, something he did when he was really stressed.

Marlene had driven to an empty lot the night before, calling a cab company to come and meet her before turning off her phone. She knew Warren was smart and had a lot of friends in the police department, seeing as he had personally brokered deals for some of the high ups and that he'd try to track her down by either her phone or her car the moment he realized she wasn't coming home. That's why she only stayed away for a night because she also knew that any longer, he'd have half the city's policemen banging on the hotel room door, trying to coax her out. She silently cursed herself for not checking the garage to make sure Warren's car wasn't inside. She just wanted so badly to get upstairs, shower, and begin packing her things for the third and final time. It wasn't the first time she'd confronted him about his cheating, or even the front time she had packed her things to leave. But she never made it past the end of the driveway before his pleas and promises made her come back inside, just to be bought with a short-lived change in him and a very expensive trinket. This time was different. This time she'd had enough and was no longer going to be Warren's fool.

"You want to know where I was, Warren? I'll tell you where I was." She stopped in her tracks turning around to fully face him. She wanted him to see what heartbreak looked like after 18 years of what was once a blissful marriage.

"I was out, crying and thinking 'How did our marriage so far off the tracks?' I loved you. Hell, I still do. The only problem is you don't feel the same. At least your dick doesn't. I don't think you have for years."

She turned back around and began ascending the stairs again when she heard him speaking again.

"Marlene, baby, I do love you so much and I'm sorry. It'll never happen again. Can we please just talk about it?" His spoke with what seemed like a genuinely remorseful tone but it was one she had heard time and time again. He was a smooth and charming man and knew how to sound sincere when it really counted. But Marlene was stupid. No, she was done.

She ignored him, feeling the tears once again rolling down her face. She walked calmly into their room, hearing his heavy footsteps as he followed her.

"I'll change baby. I promise. You know, sometimes it just takes time. You'll see I'll be a better man for you."

Marlene had had enough of his cliché and untrue lines. She dumped the bag in her hand and turned around and did something that even surprised her. She took both of her hands and pushed Warren as hard as she could, catching him off guard and almost knocking him into the wall. He took a couple of stumbling steps backwards but was able to stop before he ran into something.

"Fuck you Warren! You're such a liar!" She screamed out the top of her lungs, in a voice that even scared her. Her deep black skin seemed to be set ablaze with anger and her dark brown eyes illuminated with rage. Warren had never seen her so blind with rage and despite himself, he found her enraged look a little hot. But now was not the time to be thinking dirty thoughts. His wife had just attacked him.

"Marlene, what the hell is wrong with you?! You could've hurt me!"

She began laughing a deep, mirthless chuckle, sending shivers down Warren's spine. "It wouldn't even compare to how you've hurt me. You know, forget your shit. I'm leaving."

She pushed past him, walking down the stairs and out of the house, leaving a stunned Warren in her wake. She didn't want the clothes he had bought for her, or the phone or car or anything else he had given her out of guilt. She only wanted one thing: to get away from him.

............................................................................

Marlene tapped her fingernail angrily on the large, dark oak wood table. It was the third meeting with Warren's lawyers in as many weeks and she was getting tired of it. Not only has Warren managed not to be at any of them, but the meetings were pointless and almost called just to get a rise out of Marlene. But after dragging her through this for over a year, she was done being Warren's tool.

As his lawyer rattled on about some other arbitrary thing Warren was wanting, Marlene suddenly slammed her hand on the table, breaking the prominent lawyer's sentence and actually causing him to stop in fright.

"Where the fuck is Warren?" she spat out angrily. For her to have to be there but not him was more than unfair.

His lawyer stumbled over his words for a few seconds before finally answering. "He would have been here but he had a very important conference call he just couldn't miss."

"I've got stuff to do, and I'm here. The least he could do is show up to, considering he called ME to be here."

She stood up to leave the room, surprising both his and her lawyers. She felt as if she could explode from rage.

"Where are you going Mrs. Slayton? This meeting isn't over!" his lawyer exclaimed excitedly.

"I'm going home. Oh, and by the way, tell your client not to summon me to another one unless he's present and this thing is being finalized." With that, she walked out, slamming the door behind herself.

............................................................................

Marlene had just pulled up in front of her apartment in her 98' Honda and sighed heavily. She was a long way away from the old life she knew. Gone were the Burka and Michael Kors bags, the Fendi and Prada shoes, the trips to the spa whenever one of Warren's trysts had gotten the better of her. The housekeeper, personal chef and private fitness coach didn't exist in her new world. Her new world was replaced by a small but quiet condo on the opposite side of town from where she once called home. Her new neighbors, which once were some of the most dignified lawyers and doctors in town, were now middle managers with children that obviously didn't know what "insides voices" were.

As she drug herself out of her car, she didn't feel sad at the new "normal" that had taken over in her life. In fact, she was relieved. With the shedding of those once luxuries also came the shedding of her "friends". The ones whose shoulders she cried on after she found out about Warren's cheating, the same women who told her to suck it up and instead use those opportunities to get the things that she wanted and some of the same women that she suspected had either been with or had at least made passes at her soon-to ex. Yes, since the day she filed for divorce, not one of those women had called her or even tried to reach out to her. She knew the reason why too.

Now that she was out of the way, Warren was up for grabs. And those nasty witches were more than ready to try to take her place. Most of their husbands were older, balder, fatter heavy weights in the business world that on paper looked like prime material but in reality were nothing more than hogs looking for someplace to rut. Marlene had a golden piece of meat in front of her and all she could do was bitch about him messing around a little. So, what? As long as he came home and gave her something nice because he was "sorry" they would be more than willing to forgive him. Stupid, silly girl. Her loss was their gain.

............................................................................

"And then she slammed the door and walked out!"

Warren tried in vain to hide to amusement in his eyes as his lawyer recounted that afternoon's details. His Marlene and actually cursed out loud, something he had seen her do only three times before, including the time she assaulted him. She had grown feistier over the years and as much as he knew she would have preferred to remain docile the rest of her life, seeing this spark in her he had never seen before after such a long time of marriage was almost intoxicating. He had only wished had seen it before and more often.

"I think it's time to just settle this Mr. Slayton, honestly. She's not asking for much, far less than a woman in her position normally asks her, and she just wants this to be over. Despite her outburst this afternoon, she's still the calmest and most eerily rational spurned wife I've dealt with. If we drag this on any longer, I'm afraid we'll have to take it to court and the judge will grant her a lot more."

Warren nodded. His lawyer was right. It wasn't fair to continue to make Marlene suffer at his hands, something he had done for years and continued to regret. She was the single best thing that had ever happened to him and he had thrown it away, and for what? Just so he could sleep with other women because he could. Not because Marlene was a selfish or withholding lover. No, she was quite the opposite in fact. In the years leading up to her understandable refusal to have sexual relations with him, she was surprisingly willing to do almost anything he asked. He would give her a couple of drinks to help calm her weary nerves and then ravish her. Hearing her moans and pleas for more were the sexiest things he had ever heard in his life. His shy and reserved wife was so wild in bed that he had had her followed a few times in the past to see if she was practicing with someone else. But she wasn't, she saved herself only for him. He had heard some of the partners complaining about the numerous other lovers that their wives and/or girlfriends had taken on and he could only smile in satisfaction knowing that that wasn't the case with him. His wife was faithful and true and waiting for him and only him. Well, not anymore.

"I'll take care of it Jack, don't worry."

"How are you going to do that? You're not supposed to contact her without her lawyer present."

"I said I'll take care of it. Don't sweat the details. Just be ready for finalization in the morning."

Jack nodded curtly and headed towards the door. There was nothing else to be said. He had known Warren for long enough to know that if he was going to do something foolish, there would be no stopping him.

............................................................................

The soft knock on her door came as a huge shock. No one ever came to knock on her door except for the mailman and it was a little too late for any deliveries. The person that the knock came from however, was an even bigger shock, considering they hadn't spoken to each other in over a year unless it was through their lawyers. There he was, leaning against her doorpost like he belonged there. That stupid, crooked yet arousing smile painted on his lips, his crisp white shirt unbuttoned a few buttons down showing off his smooth yet manly chest. His pants fit his ass so nicely even she had been tempted more than once to just grab it just to see if it felt as good as it looked. But she could no longer have those thoughts. In a few weeks, they would be divorced and he would be balls deep in some unsuspecting woman. The thought made her heart sink and she almost slammed the door in his face in retribution.

He caught the closing door in his hand, forcing it to open again gently, just in time to see Marlene turn away and walk away from him.

"Great to see you too, Mar."

"What are you doing, Warren? You know you're not supposed to be here." Marlene sighed heavily for the third time that day and took her seat again at the little island in her kitchen. She resumed eating her bowl on Captain Crunch, taking her Kindle in her hand to continue her book.