Where There's Hope, Possibility

There was a knock on the door.

I was sitting on my couch in my sweatpants, eating chocolate chip muffins. The dog was drooling on my knee. No one else was home, the lights were off and Jerry had just managed to outsmart Tom once again against a backdrop of classical music, their shadows dancing against the wall.

Great, just great, I thought, why was it that every time I decide to get comfortable and stuff my face with unhealthy snacks there was a knock on the door? This never happened to my roommates, perfect little bitches.

And of course now I had to answer the door in my sweatpants and white t-shirt, with my hair standing on end. I had a dilemma. They might think no one was home, they certainly wouldn't be able to see me from the windows around the door and the lights were off....it was possible that someone had simply left the T.V. on...

But, it was also pouring rain out, so I certainly couldn't leave whoever was standing out there in it.

Damn.

For once the dog didn't seem to care that there had been a knock and actually stayed put. She was too comfortable to move and she probably hoped that as soon as I moved she would get the muffins. I growled at her to stay and moved to the door, my socked feet padding along on the thin carpet.

Only to open the door and find Him standing there. His broad weathered face was dripping with raindrops and he was wearing his heavy coat and the same beat-up ball cap he always wore.

I was frozen. I had been lusting after him at work for weeks. I found him desirable on so many levels and I doubted that he had any idea about any of it, nor would I want him too. Too embarrassing. God, was this going to get any worse?

I kept reminding myself that he was fourteen years older than me. And married.

What was he doing here? At this hour? In this weather?

He had been driving me nuts, and now he was standing on my doorstep.

Well nothing else to do but ask.

"Joshua.....Come in! What are you doing here?" He took a step inside, out of the rain and paused awkwardly looking around my living room, almost seeming to not want to look at me. He took his hat off, unconsciously twisting it in his hands. His gun-metal grey hair cut in a buzz cut gleamed in the light coming off my T.V.

"I'm sorry for bothering you so late, Ellie. But, well.....my wife left me tonight."

I wasn't sure how to take this, I couldn't be upset, but I couldn't be happy for his apparent unhappiness either. "I'm so sorry Josh. I'm...not quite sure if I can help, but if you need anything.....".

What was he doing here? I thought my heart might beat its way out of my chest....why had he come to me?

"No, no....its been coming for years, we haven't been happy in a long time...but, there were the kids..." he trailed off. He finally looked right at me. "And I know, it must seem crazy for me to have come here, you're probably wondering what I'm doing and well, maybe I am crazy after all, but I had to know, had to know if I've been losing my mind ....I know this may make me sound like I am crazy, but I've seen you watching me at work. And I had to know, do you want me Ellie...? Do you crave me the way I've been craving you?" His grey eyes drilled into mine, even in the darkness.

I froze, feeling my face flush, shit. My heart began really trying to pound its way right out of my chest, I thought that it might actually succeed this time around.

"I've been watching you too." This time I felt my face go white. Heavens. Fuck.

He stepped right into my personal space, a hair's breath away. So close I could smell his after shave. I couldn't do more then stare at his broad chest and try to keep my heart calm. I was trying my best not to begin hyperventilating. Had he just said what I had longed for him to say to me for so long?

Reaching out a hand, he paused for just a second before cupping my cheek, tilting my head back so that I had to look at him. "Do you want me, Ellie? I'll stop and go and never speak to you again if you don't....."

I shivered, my mind firing synapses so quickly I was giving myself brain freeze from the shock and suddenness of it all. I reached my own hand up to clutch his where he held my cheek and leaned into his palm. Closing my eyes and for a moment letting myself believe that this was actually happening.

"Oh God, how I've... wanted this for a very long time, Josh, I....I'm embarrassed, but yes, yes I want this...I want you....I've wanted nothing but this for months and months, wanted it so much I thought I'd explode with it all! I never thought you noticed..." I trailed off, embarrassed but determined that I would spit it all out.

"You don't know what you've been doing to me, how your smiles have made me want you every single time....", my voice rose slightly in anguish... "and I never thought you would ever want me!" There were tears on my face now and I couldn't tell if it was from all the pent up frustration or sheer joy.

He took that final small step and slipped an arm around my back, pulling me even closer. I nearly melted. And oh man oh man, did he smell good. He reached a damp finger up to brush away a tear and drew me closer, sighing almost inaudibly as my body settled against his.

He was soaked from being out in the rain and the moisture soaked into my white t-shirt where my chest was pressed against his. Of course I wasn't wearing a bra. Even in the dark I was sure he could see my peaked nipples when he tilted my body back in his strong hands, cradling my back so that he could take a good long look at me.

Then, tucking me even closer against him once more, he finally leaned down to kiss me. This time using both his hands to cup my cheeks and using his own body to brace me.

The first kiss was tentative, but I responded eagerly, slipping my tongue past his hard lips, eagerly grasping at my first taste of him....mint tooth paste, a touch of caramel, and him, just him.... it seemed to prove that I did really want this and his mouth pressed harder into mine, taking everything I had to give, his tongue tangling with mine in a battle of desperation to taste me as much as I was tasting him.

It was one of the most satisfying kisses I have ever had.

We finally had to come up for air, I was completely plastered against his body, my front completely soaked, he had his arms wrapped around me and had only pulled back enough to rest his nose against mine, we were both breathing heavily. If we hadn't have stopped, we might have passed out, right there in the hallway and then what would my roommates have to say?

I couldn't believe this was happening, couldn't believe that he was here and that he was offering himself to me. I heard myself speak, though it didn't sound like me at all as I asked him to come upstairs with me. I felt him nod against me, never letting go of one of his big hands and never really not looking at him, I led him upstairs to my bedroom in the darkness of the dark, stormy night.

He looked slightly out of place standing in my doorway, dripping water on the carpet, even more so than he had standing out in the rain. I turned to face him and slowly backed up.

I Paused to drink in the sight of him still flushed from the kiss downstairs and I decided that for once I was going to do this as I had always wanted to, I wasn't going to be shy and lose out on everything I wanted to experience.

I raised my hands to pull my white t-shirt over my head. Flinging it away from me carelessly stretching my arms up, putting myself on display for him. I had wanted his eyes on me for so long....

His eyes were riveted on my breasts. I brought my hands down to cup them, gently rolling my nipples with my own fingers, they were large and always seemed to catch men's eyes, never before though had they caught his, at least as far as I had ever been able to tell. Then I continued trailing my fingers down to the waistband of my sweatpants. I stripped them off with my underwear without any further ado and stood there in the full light of my lamp and let him look as much as he might like at my body.

I am not a little girl, though I had a feeling he would make me feel like one before the night was over. I have full round breasts and hips and I usually tower over my other girlfriends. I wasn't ashamed of my body, but I wasn't always comfortable with it either. It was hard for me to stand there like that, but I wanted him to see what he was getting, to see what I had been offering him for months and months, what I had never realized he had seen before.

I took two steps back, feeling my knees hit the foot of my bed, sitting down and scooting back on it, I crooked my finger at him, beckoning him to come and join me.

I splayed myself across the bed, spreading my legs so that he could see how much I already wanted him. I began playing with my breasts again, all the while still trying convey how much I wanted him in bed with me with my eyes.

He took a couple steps forward and began unbuttoning his coat. Letting it drop to the floor with a wet plop he revealed the simple blue button up work shirt he had underneath with blue jeans and his boots. He had the beginning of a belly, but his shoulders were broad and he just gave that over all impression of being solid. He had been in the Marines for years before he had retired and had then come to where we both worked now. His grey - streaked buzzed cut hair was still reminiscent of his military background.

His slightly rounded square face showed ruddy in the light and with the display I was putting on as his fingers started on his own shirt. He always had an open friendly expression on his face, his humorous personality shining through most situations, but now he looked focused and determined. On me.

This must have been how he looked when he was drilling his men in the Marines. I felt myself getting wetter and let one of my hands trail down between my thighs, teasing my clit with one finger, not allowing myself more until he did what he wanted with me.

The blue work shirt came off almost agonizingly slowly, only to reveal a plain cotton undershirt under it, which he un-tucked and pulled over his head in the same manner I had.

His chest was as broad and solid as I had always imagined it would be, showing nicely rounded muscles through his shoulders and biceps that I should have expected and while his stomach was a little softer than I'm sure it had been ten years ago, I liked the appearance of age and maturity it lent his otherwise built features. Without it I would have thought I had run away with the high school quarterback who always had been and always would be out of my league. No, it was better with that small imperfection. His chest hair was darker than the hair on his head, but it was still grey. I wanted to run my fingers through it....

Never quite stopping himself from watching me as I touched myself for him on my bed, he bent down and undid his boots, pulling them off and setting them neatly by the door, his socks going in them afterwards.

He straightened up and took a second to stare only at me, making me nearly beg him to hurry up and join me. He growled low under his breath and walked to the end of the bed, staring at me for another long moment before placing one knee on the comforter and climbing slowly upwards towards me.

I had always loved the sight of a man in jeans and nothing else and watching my fantasy crawling up towards me with a predatory look on his face in such a state of dress nearly did me in.

And then he was finally looming over me, dwarfing me, running those calloused fingers down my cheek where he had originally started and trailing them down my neck to my breasts and my belly, combing gently through the golden curls at the junction of my thighs.

I arched into him and silently begged him with my eyes for more. And then he was kissing me again, letting me wrap my completely naked self around him, rubbing myself against him like a cat, enjoying the abrasiveness of his jeans against my legs and the roughness of his chest hair on my much softer breasts.

I was about to lose my mind and frantically started reaching for the button on his jeans. He let me and I managed to quickly loosen his jeans and started helping him push them down with his boxer briefs, which only managed to make things more difficult.

He never stopped kissing me. He rose up on his knees to get his pants down and then did some interesting gymnastics to get them fully off, revealing his cherry red erection, which matched the complexion of his cheeks and bounced upward as it was finally released into the cooler air of the room.

I had never seen a man with grey pubic hair before. I decided I liked it as much as the rest of him.

I was finally able to take my hands and rake them down his chest and thighs and between his legs, only allowing myself a brief moment of caressing his broad hardness, imaging what I could do to all of it later, which made him still under my touch and arch into me before I grabbed his hips and pulled him back into me.

I didn't think I could stand much foreplay.

And then he was finally where I had wanted him for the past several months. On top of me, naked and wanting me as much as I apparently wanted him. I took a second to drink him in, all of him and the moment that we were in. His hands parted my thighs so that he could settle back down between them, pushing them much wider than I had had them before, teasing me by resting his heavy shaft against where I really wanted him before he gave me a wicked grin, like the little boy whose just gotten the last cookie, and then he placed himself at my entrance and started pushing inside of me.

I wasn't really ready for him, despite the lead up to where we were now, I hadn't had a lover in some months and wasn't as wet as I could be, but I was glad he was doing it this way. I wanted to feel my body stretch and get wetter to accommodate all of him pushing deep into me. I wanted the burn he was causing as he pushed a bit further before having to draw out a little bit so that he could push in a little further. One of his hands slipped under my shoulder to steady me against him, the other held my thigh up to keep me exactly where he wanted me. And his grey eyes held mine as his body slowly forced its way into mine for the first time.

My hands clenched his biceps and I couldn't help but arch up against him, trying to impale myself on him more quickly, rubbing my breasts and anything else I could manage against him. It was like heaven and hell all wrapped up in one. Heaven because he was finally doing me exactly as I had dreamed and hell because I wanted him ramming himself into me as hard as he could, but I still wanted it drawn out just like he was doing.

It went on and on, his body forcing his way into mine. I could feel my inner muscles fighting against him, which only made him rub against all the right spots even more.

It felt like an eternity. His eyes boring into mine just as his body was, my fingers clenched into his muscles and his hands holding me still as I wriggled and tried to make things happen more quickly.

I had started moaning somewhere in all of this and now it almost seemed like I was mewling like a cat, I just couldn't hold it in.

And then he was finally all the way inside of me, pressed against that spot far in the back of me that could make me black out if pressed the right way. His hips were pressed tightly into mine and somewhere near the end he had let go of my thigh so that I could wrap my legs around his hips and my arms had slipped around his back, his around mine and we were eye to eye, nose to nose, chest to chest and everything else that mattered.

And time stopped.

We breathed together and neither of us seemed capable of moving. Neither of us really wanted to move. If he had wanted me as long as I had wanted him, then it must have been as much of an eternity to the having of us for him as it had been for me. And now, here we were, where we had both longed to be.

I had had my arms locked around him and it was me who was finally able to relax my body down into the hollow we had created in the mattress and loosen my thighs enough around his to arch my body up against him once more, pulling him back just enough to forcibly thrust my body back against his, clenching him deep inside me.

It was his turn to groan.

I was wet now, I could feel myself sliding easily around him and those blissful shivers of orgasm had started running up and down my spine. I just wasn't there quite yet...

I finally let me eyes close and ran my hands up his back and into his hair, using my nails to lightly scrape along his scalp. He groaned again and thrust his head back to make me press harder, which of course forced his body further into mine and seemed to remind him that there were other things we could be doing.

His eyes focused back down onto mine and he finally started a slow steady thrusting in and out of me.

It was torture. It was bliss. It was everything I had always thought it would be.

His slow steady rhythm built and built into me until I thought I'd go hoarse from whimpering and the muscles in my hands were going numb from holding onto him as hard as I was. I never wanted him to stop. I needed him to stop. It was the sweetest torment I could have ever imagined.

He was growling something against my cheek now and I could only vaguely pick out the repeated "mine now....mine....oh Ellie Ellie Ellie....mine now...." Over and over and over and it was enough to finally push me over that edge, into the abyss, screaming his name against his shoulder as my body fought and twisted to throw him off and bring him back into me once more so that the tremors would go on and on....

I finally felt my climax subside and had to loosen my entire body from the overwhelming exhaustion I now felt. Little clutches deep inside my cunt were still occurring and I realized that he hadn't stopped the slow, insidious thrusting. That he was staring at me with feral eyes.

I felt more relaxed than I had in months.

Every so often he would add just the tiniest bit of emphasis on the end of a thrust and it would set sparks through my body once again.

He began building me up again.

My legs were sprawled wide on the bed and now that he had finally quenched that first overwhelming thirst I was able to run my hands down his chest and tweak his nipples, scratching ever so gently, my hands wandering wherever I wanted.

I wasn't mewling anymore, now I was purring.

He brought his mouth down to gently nibble along my jaw, though I'm sure he wasn't feeling very gentle any more.

He suckled on the curve of my throat, right under my chin and let his hands begin roaming my chest, just as I was doing to him. I sighed in pleasure and pulled my knees up to deepen his invasion inside of me once again. I knew he needed to cum. He needed to cum like I had needed to cum, but he didn't want to seem to stop this first sweet pleasure.

It was my turn to whisper into his ear. "Josh, Josh baby, cum for me darling, cum for me.....oh fuck baby, right there, fuck, oh fuck, John....!"

His forehead finally dropped to mine and he began hunching into me frantically, losing all control of his rhythm. I felt my body let go in another sweet orgasm as he began bucking and begging me to take him and to never ever stop.

I held him against me. His body loosely sprawled over mine, his nose against my cheek on the pillow and I finally let myself drift into unconsciousness for just a little while....

I woke up with him wrapped around me, holding me close, watching me as he had been since he first looked up at me. I was too comfortable to move so I smiled at him and stared back.

I didn't think I had been out long, but it was wonderful to wake up to him holding me and watching me like I was the most perfect thing he had ever seen.