White Trash and Lovin' It Ch. 01

White Trash Livin' And Fuckin' Parody

My Family in This Episode :

My Mama Patty (Patricia Heaton)

My Step Granny Paula Deen (Herself)

My Sister Gianna Michaels (Herself)

My Sister Kat (Kat Dennings)

My Cousin Alia Janine (Herself)

My Aunt Peggy Bundy (Married With Children)

My Aunt Suga (Kym Whitley)

My Uncle Phil (Dr Phil)

My Cousin Spence (Spence From The King Of Queens)

And

My Cousin Cletus

Episode 01 : Welcome To The World's Horniest Trailer Park

Hey there... I'm James. I'm the star of this big ol' ball of white trash fun and fuckin'. Kick back, pop open a case of Bud, and enjoy my story. It's a fun story. A lot of good ol' fashioned, wholesome, crazy ass fun and games. I live in the Dick Creek Trailer Park, otherwise known as... The World's Horniest Trailer Park.

My family, our friends and I are about as white trash as white trash gets. We fight... we fuck... we party... we fuck... we get drunk... we fuck... we get in trouble... we fuck... and we make the most out of our situation in life... and we fuck.

I just got married... for the third time... to a girl you've probably heard of... Kim Kardashian. We are the odd couple I guess. She's all fancy and rich and sophisticated and shit. Me... I'm the horniest, moonshine makin', drug dealin', white trash pimpin' motherfucker you'll ever come across... and I live in a trailer park. But Kim and I work. We love each other... we care about each other... and the sex is motherfucking awesome.

You see... I'm known as a pretty fuckin' good ladies man. I get em and I get em whenever, wherever, and how ever I want em. I'm pretty darn charming... and I've got a 14 inch cock that's always ready to fuck.

I've got three wives... Kim, my aunt Beth, and porn queen Kelly Madison... several girlfriends... a bunch of hot and horny relatives... a whole mess of fuck buddies... and even a few baby mamas. I think it's four at last count.

Hell... I even got a damn leprechaun (Former WWE Superstar Hornswoggle) living in a shed in my back yard. But more about him later.

I make my way to the living room, nude, scratching my nuts, and sit down. I pick up a half empty beer can from the coffee table and finish it. I yawn and fart... a big one... my morning routine.

My Mama Patty is over there in the kitchen cooking up some breakfast... sausage and steak, bacon, scrambled eggs and biscuits. Mama is a helluva great cook. A great fuck too. She gets me outta jams too. "Hey mama... can you go to Mr Edison's place and suck his cock for me? I owe his ass $500."

"Sure sweetheart... anything for my baby. Come and eat. I'll go take care of him right now for ya."

"OK mama... thank you." Mama kisses me, and jerks my soft cock, as I head in the kitchen to eat. She heads over to the trailer park manager's place to pay off another debt for me. Mama does it all the time. She's awesome.

I dig in and start eating when my new wife comes in, in a white bathrobe, yawning. "Good morning babe." Kim greets me. She comes over and kisses me... I squeeze her ass... then she gets some coffee and comes back over and sits in my lap. "Sexy man. You fucked me so good last night babe. My ass is so sore... in the best possible way. I can barely walk." We laugh and kiss. I fucked Kim's ass all night long last night. I love my wife's ass... everybody does... I just get to fuck it. I'm in love, bitches. I ain't afraid to say it.

People wonder why I'm living in a damn trailer park since I'm married to a rich and famous piece of ass like Kim. I live here because I want to, not because I have to. It's who I am. It's my roots. Kim digs it too. It let's her let her hair down, so to speak. She can run around nude and shit and not worry about the paparazzi harassing her. She's gotta worry about all the horny motherfuckers that live here harassing her, and trying to fuck her and feel her up, but that's somethin' else.

"Mmmmmm... I love you James. I love you so damn much babe. Sexiest white trash pimp ever." We laugh. I suck Kim's tongue and fondle her titties, through her robe. We make out... and eat... and make out some more.

Mama comes back in the trailer. "I don't know what that man eats, but he's got the nastiest tasting sperm I've ever ate. I tried to spit it out, but he made me feel guilty, so I drank it. It's some funky ass cum. He's got a nice cock though. Nice and thick. If you ever suck him off Kim, make sure you chew some gum or something while you swallow that jizz." Mama makes a, "it's gross" face and comes and gets some coffee.

"Thanks mama. You're the best."

"Awwww...you're welcome baby. You know I'll do anything for you sweetie pie." Mama blows me a big kiss and drinks her coffee.

"MAMA... THAT LITTLE BASTARD IS PEEPIN' ME AGAIN!" My sister Kat yells from her bedroom.

"JUST JERK HIM OFF OR KICK HIM IN THE NUTS OR SOMETHING!" Mama yells back, sipping her coffee, winking and smiling at Kim and I.

My little leprechaun pet, Hornswoggle (Former WWE Superstar Hornswoggle) is at it again. He's a little, horny ass peepin' tom. I keep him in the shed in my backyard. Our trailer is big as fuck. It's like four double wides combined together, with a big ass yard, and a couple of sheds out back. One of em is a makeshift porn studio I built. Another is for my moonshine equipment and stuff.

"When's Beth getting out James?" Mama asks about her sister, my aunt/wife Beth. She got in some trouble smuggling drugs for me and got a little jail time.

"Tomorrow, I think. I miss dem titties." I motorboat Kim's tits. She giggles, almost spilling her coffee. Beth's got the nicest titties. I love big ol' titties. Beth's got 38F's so she, they, and I have a whole lotta fun together.

"James... Spence is worthless. I tried to get him to take some titty pics for a magazine... and all he could do was play with himself and stare at my tits. The pictures suck. I mean if he wanted a titty fuck, all he's gotta do is ask, but the loser just jerked off and drooled." My cousin Alia Janine comes in, shaking her head, bitchin' about our cousin Spence. She comes over and kisses me... and Kim. We have a nice three way kiss and big titty fondle... Alia has 34G tits. She's one sexy ass cousin.

"I mean... look at these tits." Alia pulls her white, wifebeater tank top and white bra up, showing us her awesome tits. Damn, they're beautiful. I squeeze em. Kim does too. Mama comes over and sucks em, pullin' those big nipples as far as they go and lettin' em snap back. Got damn, I'm horny.

"Mmmmm... that feels so damn good aunt Patty. Yeahhhhh." Alia moans, licking her lips, while mama works over her huge, natural tits.

I line up Kim, mama and Alia, bend em all over the kitchen table and start fuckin' em doggy style, bitches. I smack dem asses and squeeze dem hangin' titties, fucking those sweet ass pussies deep, hard and faster than a jack rabbit on a meth binge. Mama plays with her clit, while I bang Alia senseless. "YESSSSSSSSSSSS!! POUND MY PUSSY COUSIN!! FUCK YEAHHHHHHHH!! GOD DAMN I LOVE YOUR HUGE FUCKING COCK JAMES!!" Alia screams out, squirtin. I pound Kim even harder. That bald pussy wrapppin so tight around my super thick dick. I wreck that shit, smackin' that perfect ass over and over.

"Who's your daddy bitch?" I ask Kim, pounding the fuck outta her pussy from behind. The God damn table shaking like crazy.

"OH MY GOD!!... YOU ARE JAMES!!... YOUR MY DADDY BABY!!" Kim screams out, squirting all over my cock and me.

I squeeze mama's sweet titties, while I pummel her bushy twat... my fuckin' 14 inches barrelling up that super sweet, milf pussy like a jackhammer outta control. "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!... FUCK ME BABYYYYYYYYYYY!!... FUCK YOUR MAMA'S PUSSYYYYYYYYYYYY BABYYYYYYYY!!" Mama shoots the biggest pussy squirt ever. It flies out that beautiful pussy a thousand miles an hour, splaterring everywhere. I pull out and all three hottie get on their knees.

Mama, Alia and Kim suck me off, taking turns, jerking my huge cock and suckin' it, moanin' and squirming on the floor. They are some cum hungry sluts... And I give it to em. My jizz blasts out my cum bazooka full blast. It covers their faces, fills their mouths, and even sprays their titties. Damn mega load.

Mama, Alia and Kim got me all fuckin' horny and shit. They drink down all my cum and suck me dry. They lick each other's gorgeous, cum hungry, smilin' faces and sweet, soft titties clean.

I start pissin' and Alia shoves me dick in her mouth. The bitch loves drinking my piss more than drinking beer. I feed it to her. Alia drinks it all down, every God damn drop. She shakes dem eyebrows at me, smilin' so pretty at me, while she drinks my piss. Kim sucks my big, hairy balls, smilin' so pretty up at me.

I pull out of Alia's mouth and piss a little on Kim and mama's sweet faces. They smile and both of em suck me dry. We all hug and kiss. I fondle their titties and ass.

Outside... Ol' Hornswoggle is peeping my sister Kat. He's on a step ladder outside her bedroom window, grinning from ear to ear, drooling all over himself, watching my super hot and busty sister get dressed. Kats got a white sports bra and thong on. She shakes her head when she sees Hornswoggle leering at her through the window. She decides to just let em inside so he can get a good look and leave her alone. "Horny... get in here. Might as well get a good luck, you little pervert." Kat smirks.

Hornswoggle opens Kats window and climbs through it, slipping and falling off her dresser. Kat laughs. "You OK?" Hornswoggle nods and giggles, making his horny leprechaun noises. He stares wide eyed at Kat's big ass, beautiful titties. All three of my sisters have big, natural titties. All of em are sexy as fuck.

"You like what you see huh?... You better. Play your cards right and I might let you fuck me again." We all fuck. Hornswoggle has fucked my mama and Kat before... he even fucked Nikki-Dee once, when she was hammered outta her mind. Gianna has jerked him off a few times and let him cum and piss on her titties... but no sex. The little bastard has a big ol' dick so he does well with the ladies... and men too.

"Take your dick out and drool." Kat smiles... and pulls her sports bra over her tits, revealing her awesome, heavy and full as fuck, natural wonders. Hornswoggle pulls his 8 and a half inch cock out and starts jerking it, drooling, staring wide eyed at Kats tits. Kat laughs.

"Good boy." Kat takes her thong off and throws it at Hornswoggle. She climbs up on the bed and gets on all fours, grabbing the headboard. She wiggles her phat ass at the horny little leprechaun. "Come and get it big boy." Kat shakes her eyebrows at Hornswoggle and shakes that sweet booty again.

Hornswoggle jumps on the bed... or tries too. He finally gets up there and shivers his big dick in Kat's juicy cunt, smacking her curvy ass, holding her hips, as he plows her pussy. "FUCKKKKKKKK... DAMN YOU GET A BIG DICK FOR SUCH A LITTLE BODY! FUCK IT GOOD LEPRECHAUN!" Kat tells him. Hornswoggle plows up her pussy, smacking her ass as he does.

Kat's bed shakes, her big titties hanging down and floppin' wildly. "SHITTTTTTTT!!" Kat cums. Hornswoggle keeps plowing her pussy, his big dick working it real damn good. "DO IT HARDER BITCH!" Kat reaches back and smacks his drooling, grinning face. Hornswoggle pounds her pussy harder and harder, so fucking deep. Kat cums again.

Hornswoggle shoves all the way up Kat's cum shooting pussy and jizzes it. His thick cream blasts out in three big squirts. He shakes his head and grunts and giggles. Kat moans and takes a deep breath, pleased with Hornswoggle's pussy plowing.

"That was good, you little pervert. Come back tomorrow and I might let you plow my ass... If I'm in the mood... but we both know I probably will be." Kat laughs.

My friend Bubba lives next door. He works in the carnival. He's the Man With Four Balls. Yeah... he's got four big ass nuts. He's a short, really fat and hairy dude but he's got an 11 inch dich and four big, hairy balls. He farts a lot too. He's won a few fartin' championships. He's the Dick Creek champ five years runnin'.

His wife Sally (Kristen Johnston/ Third Rock From The Sun) has some sweet titties too. She's put on a few pounds lately, but still got dem great titties.

"BUBBA!! GET YOUR FAT ASS OUT HERE!!" Sally yells. Bubba comes out, farting.

"Yeah." He's eating a big ass, pimento cheese and turkey sandwich.

"If you could stop stuffing your face for five minutes, you could fix this damn water speaket. It's been leaking for three weeks. You said you were gonna fix it ten times and you ain't fixed shit! Damn lazy, fat ass, four ball bum!" Sally shakes her head in disgust.

I look out the bathroom window and see Sally yelling at Bubba. I hang my head out the window while I'm peeing. "Hey Bubba... Hey Sally sweet tits." Sally smiles at me.

"Hey James. Thanks for noticing baby doll. Bring your sexy ass over here and fuck em. Teach this stupid bastard how to fuck some titties. Bring Kim... we can swing. If she can handle Bubba's fat, fartin' ass." Sally blows me a big kiss.

"I'll think about it. Don't know if Kim could handle Bubba's fartin'." We all laugh. I shake my dick and flush the toilet.

My Uncle Phil and Aunt Suga are living with us. Their house burned down, so they moved in with us, til they get another one. They're going at it hot and heavy in their bedroom. Suga is a hot, black piece of ass. She's got some huge ass 36G chocolate titties too. All natural.

"Damn daddy... pound that shit!"

"Yeahhh... take that while dick mama! Yee haw!"

I hear them through the door. I stand there and listen. I laugh. Kat walks out of her room and sees me listening to Phil and Suga. She joins me. "They're gonna at it pretty good babe." Kat says, her ear against the door.

"Yeah... I know." I squeeze Kat's ass while we listen.

"Do that shit white boy!"

"Hell yeah baby... I'm doin' it good... all up in that stank!"

Kat and I laugh. She covers her mouth. Kat kisses me, those full, luscious, red lips tasting so sweet. She backs up to me and I slide my dick up her ass. It's tight, but she takes it in. Kat covers her mouth, screaming in pleasure into her hands, as I plunge deep up her ass, fucking it slowly, long, deep strokes. Kat hols both hands over her screaming mouth. She closes her eyes, loving my 14 inch cock monster stuffed all up in that sweet ass booty. I bang it, long, deep strokes in and out, over and over. Kat squirts all over my legs.

"Damn daddy... that big dick got me cummin' and shit! Woo!" Suga is having fun with Phil.

"Damn good pussy... Love that black pussy! Hell yeah!" Phil's having a good time too.

So am I. I fuck Kat with deep, hard thrusting strokes up her tight ass. I squeeze those huge titties through her white sports bra. I pull it up and go to town molesting dem titties, banging the fuck outta her ass.

"FUCKKKK!!" Kat screams out, squirting again. I just bang her booty harder and faster. Kat cums again.. and again... and again. My cock don't stop, bitches. It plows my hot sister's phat ass while I squeeze the fuck outta her gorgeous titties. Kat cums again, squirting everywhere. I finally pump her ass full of jizz. We kiss while I pump her booty full like a cum gas pump. Kat moans and moans in my mouth, sucking my tongue. I twist and pull her beautiful nipples, shaking the fuck outta em. I squeeze dem titties so damn hard. I love Kat's big ol' tits.

"Kat... is that you out there?" Uncle Phil asks.

"Yes Uncle Phil... sorry." Kat smiles at me and kisses me again.

"C'mon in here girl... join in the fun. There's always room for one more on the Phil Train." Uncle Phil's horny.

We laugh. "OK... sure." Kat winks at me as she opens the door and goes in. I smack her ass. She jumps and blows me a kiss, shutting the door.

Damn... my family is horny as fuck... and I love it.

Over at my Aunt Peggy's trailor...

"YESSSSS!! GOD... YOU HAVE A NICE COCK SPENCE! FUCKKKKK!!" Peggy is riding cousin Spence's super thick dick on her living room sofa. She's got her usual, black spandex pant suit on, black heels, red and black thin blouse, over her top. Her sexy ass red hair is all poofed out, so damn much hairspray, she's single handedly killing the damn Ozone layer. My Aunt Peggy is a fun chick. She's recently divorced. She moved in the trailor park after she left Chicago, where she was living before.

Peggy's bouncing like crazy on Spence's absurdly thick dick. It's only six damn inches... But this thicker than his forearm. The chubby little bastard gets laid... everybody around here does. He knocked up Kat... but she had an abortion. Didn't want a fat nerd baby she said. (Laughing)... I love my sister. She's a hoot.

Spence squeezes Peggy's big tits through her black, spandex top. He's grinning like crazy. Peggy's got a sweet pussy. She can fuck your brains out too. "I'm cumming again... YESSSSSSSSSSS... WOOOOOOOOOO!!" Peggy squirts all over Spence's dick. He cums up her red haired, bushy, milf twat. Dudes got some thick cum too. Kat loves drinkin' it. Mama does too. They say it's second, only to mine. Peggy leans back and kisses Spence's cheek. "Good boy Spence." Peggy gets up, pulls her pants up and goes in the kitchen.

Mama comes over. "Hey Peggy... Hey Spence. Oh... What do we have here?" Mama walks over to Spence and kneels down, sucking his cum glazed cock clean. She holds it and looks up at him, shaking a finger. "Don't wanna waste any nice sperm, now do we?" Mama sucks Spence's huge cock head hard, licking the piss slit. Mama sucks out every drop of jizz Spence has got in him. She wipes her lips and heads over to the kitchen table to talk to Peggy. Spence just leans back and takes a deep breath, worn out.

Mr Edison is out creepin'. Sally and he talk for a few... then she takes him in her trailor. Bubba went to get beer. Mr Edison plows Sally's twat and ass til Bubba gets back. Sally makes Bubba watch her suck off Mr Edison. She puts on a show, licking, slobbering, spitting all over that big dick while Bubba watches... and farts. Sally shakes her head... then drinks down Mr Edison's nasty sperm. She's done it a bun h of times already, so she's got plenty of gum in her mouth, chewing it, while she drinks the stank jizz.

Sally then fucks Mr Edison and Bubba at the same time. She's a horny fuckin' slut. They pound her holes for an hour. Sally makes Bubba suck off Mr Edison and drink his stank sperm. The taste doesn't even bother Bubba. He sucks it down with ease. Sally just shakes her head again. "Fucking four ball loser." Sally says to herself.

My Step Granny Paula Deen is out back, bent over, picking some strawberries in my back yard. Damn sweet old ass. I grab her hips and grind in her phat ass. "Oooh... hey honey child. Brought me a present huh? Mmmmmm... mmmmmmmm... Granny Paula loves her favorite grandson's presents... so big and meaty. Mmmmmmmm... Yall got me all juicy in my panties."

Paula wiggles that sweet ass on my dick. I pull her beige pants and white cotton panties down. I bend over and lick that bushy, granny pussy real damn good. Paula's got one sweet tasting pussy. I lick her out, rolling my tongue all in that wet ass cunt. Paula moans and cums on my tongue. I lap it up, kissing her pussy over and over.

I spend the next thirty minutes ass fucking my step granny. She screams and creams, cumming six times. I grab that gray hair and pound the fuck outta her wide booty. I smack it so damn much, that white skin is covered in red hand prints. I pull out and cum in Paula's mouth.

"Mmmmmm... mmmmm. Mmmmmmmm." Paula happily drinks it all down, with a huge grin on her sexy face. She takes a strawberry and jerks out a few drops od jizz on it. She winks at me and eats the jizz covered strawberry, licking it, moaning the whole time.