Why Leili Hates Witches Ch. 05

"Isn't the word 'fighter' on your diploma?" The Witch said while cocking her head quizzically.

"It is..." Leili said through a smile that implied danger as her fists clenched. "I was a straight 'A' student too. Are your here for a demonstration?"

"I'm here to talk to Kierdis." The Witch said, raising her hands in a placating gesture. "He's going to wake up soon, so I thought I'd give him some advice about his... extra parts now that he's evicted the free loaders. You've already stopped the calamity I predicted back in Herger Burg."

"That was kinda anti-climactic." Leili said dryly.

"That was kinda the point." The Witch said matter of factly.

"Wait a minute..." Leili's eyes narrowed with sudden suspicion. "You predicted? As in personally? Not some other purple haired, know-it-all in a pointy hat?" Leili had originally been sent on her sex-filled quest by a much younger looking version of the same woman.

The Witch's lips pressed together in an expression that tried but ultimately failed to suppress the body language for "Oh shit! I said too much!" Before Leili could press the issue further a hand landed on her shoulder. Turning to see who it was, Leili saw an older looking version of the same person with an annoying smile on her face.

"You need to speak with me, there are still some things you need to know." She turned her insincere smile to the purple haired girl Leili had been speaking to. "You need to watch what you say, Kylie!"

"S-sorry!" The younger witch said as Leili was trundled off to the market.

Leili liked to think of herself as a patient person. She hadn't stabbed any of the fortune telling nuisances after all. There was a point however, when enough was enough. As her older looking clone lead her into the market and began picking out food that Leili had to admit she liked, Leili decided to show the fortune tellers that they weren't as clever as they thought they were.

"You're picking out the ingredients for some dragon's pie, aren't you Kylie." Leili said casually. The purple haired witch went on rummaging through the peppers that would spice up the lamb and potatoes already purchased as she responded.

"Yeah, it was always my favorite. Nobody could ever make it quite like mom did, though." The fortune teller didn't seem to notice Leili's misdirection. Which opened up Leili's next dig.

"You'll need to buy more if we're going to invite the younger and older Kylie's to dinner." She said, grabbing a few more potatoes. The witch dropped one of the peppers she was inspecting and turned a shocked expression towards Leili. "Oh, don't look so shocked. Once I got a good look at you, it was obvious. You're taller than I am, and I'm certain that this is as tall as I get. So you probably got that from Kierdis. Your eyes are more like his than mine too. Also, everybody knows that red and blue make purple. At least give me that much credit." As Kylie stared in disbelief, Leili basked in the satisfaction of figuring out their little secret. As the older Kylie tried to regain her composure a hearty peal of laughter rang out as more people joined the conversation.

"I told you she would figure it out soon." Said the old woman version of Kylie as she also started adding ingredients to their haul. The youngest version of Kylie followed her, eyes sparkling with anticipation as she saw the ingredients. "We get our intelligence from her, after all. Now then..."

Without another word the elderly woman wrapped her arms around Leili in a fond embrace. When the oldest was done with the hug, the youngest eagerly pounced, squeezing Leili tight with a gleeful smile. Then Kylie's older self joined in from behind. For once, Leili wasn't annoyed, but felt touched at the warm feelings behind the embraces. She had never known what family was like. Even though the various renditions of her daughter had been annoying at times, she found herself warming to the concept of being a mother.

"The hell is this all about?" someone squeaked behind them. Leili turned to see a sprite, seated upon a vaguely familiar looking man's shoulder. Both the man and the sprite had their heads cocked in confusion

"Litti, we haven't started drinking yet, right?" The green haired man said.

"No."

"Then why am I already seeing triple?"

"No need to worry young man, they're all closely related." The elderly Kylie replied. "How's your brother doing with his new wife?"

"Like most newlyweds do." Karth said, with a hint of bitterness at his own lack of consummation. "News travels really fast, granny. I only just found out."

"We'll I wouldn't be a good soothsayer if I couldn't dig up some sooth." The elder Kylie said. "I'll have some new work for you tomorrow so don't cope too hard tonight."

"No promises!" Litti said from his shoulder as the two headed for the bar.

The old witch paid for the food, over Leili's protests and the group went back to find Kierdis giving a skeptical look to the Kylie that had stayed behind. The girl of Leili's age was blushing and looked very relieved to see the rest of them coming back. Kierdis didn't seem to find eating with this group wierd and joked and laughed along with the rest. The dinner was the most pleasant one Leili could ever remember having. Soon, the future versions of Leili and Kierdis' child bade them goodnight. As Leili helped the eldest Kylie down the steps of the threshold, the old woman imparted some advice.

"Now don't think anything is set in stone because of this. We had to work very hard to change fate and avert disaster. Just live as you always have, make decisions without thinking of the consequences based on the half knowledge you have of the future. Also, don't worry about when you conceive, you get to have a lot more fun before you have to worry about being a mother. Like tonight for instance..." Leili felt her face on fire as a woman old enough to be her grandmother talked about Leili giving birth to her. Embarrassed, she ushered the old woman away faster. As she and Kierdis walked back to their new home, he broke the awkward silence.

"Hey, Leili... Is it possible for something you haven't done yet to feel familiar?" He asked.

"There's a word for it I think..." Leili mused as she turned to shut the door. As soon as she had set the lock, she felt herself floating in the air as Kierdis' tentacles lifted her. "Wha? Kierdis!"

"That discussion was interesting, but I want to do something familiar. Plus..." Kierdis' tentacles smoothly undressed Leili and laid her upon the dinner table. "I'm still hungry." Before Leili could decide if she wanted to object, Kierdis leaned over her and gave a hungry kiss. Leili's resistance melted away before it could start as his tentacles and tongue explored her bare skin.

"What's... Ah! What's gotten into you? You didn't use them at all this morning!" Was all the protest Leili could muster as her body began to long for him.

"I was worried that I might not have gotten all of that thing out." Kierdis replied as he casually shucked his shirt and pants without breaking stride. Leili was once again impressed and aroused at how suave her man was when the mood took him. "Your fortune telling clone let me know that they're tracking the thing I ripped out. I'm in complete control and these are all me now." As if to show he meant it, the tentacles rippled a caress up and down Leili's body. Leili's back arched and a lusty gasp escaped, goading Kierdis on further. "She also let me know a few things about what I can really do with these."

Leili looked down towards Kierdis' groin as he squinted at himself in concentration. Slowly, but surely, a copy of Kierdis' own manhood grew atop his current one. Both were erect and pulsing along with Kierdis' breathing as he looked over Leili on the table. Leili had enjoyed being in charge earlier today. It was a little frustrating that her lover could flip the tables on her so effortlessly. She knew it was better to be in charge of one's desires instead of the other way around. However, when she looked Kierdis in the eyes, didn't her reason and instincts both agree? Kierdis himself was obviously holding back as his hungry eyes seemed to ask her for permission. He needed an answer.

Leili grabbed an apple from their leftovers and stuck it in her mouth. Then responded by spreading her legs.

***

If anyone had been walking the path into the woods that went by their cottage they would have heard what sounded like an orgy coming from the kitchen of the small home. If they continued on past the house behind the guildhall, they would have heard the satisfied snores of two newlyweds. The two were completely spent after a day of consummating their new relationship. If, by chance, that person had also gone to the tavern for relief from evidence of sexual acts, they would find none. Instead they would have to put up with the antics of a drunken woodsman slurping ale out a tankard that had a naked, inebriated, and amorous sprite swimming in it. It was night time though, so what kind of voyeuristic moron would be doing that?