Will You?

Yes she did.

I tease her about that, too.

I happen to know for sure she likes me for me, it can't be for my money.

I ain't got any.

+++

Anyway, back to Rachel. It seems that she went to the clinic, Debra checked her out and found her to be normal after listening to her complain about never having had an orgasm.

Yea, I know. Doctors are not supposed to talk about private issues of their clients. But Debra and I are married, and she talks about things that happen at work all the time.

Like old man Vidalis that owns the shoe store down on main street. I know him, that is where I bought my rubber boots.

"USA made!" The old bastard said to me. Hell, I could see the remains of the glue where he had scraped off the "Made in China" sticker.

I didn't give a shit about that, they didn't leak which was good enough for me.

Old man Vidalis is maybe 5 feet tall and skinny. He is also bald on top with a row of pure white curly hair that wraps around just above his ears which stick straight out, funny looking old guy.

He came in to see Debra, concerned about being "a bit too quick.", which was the way she said he put it.

Debra even duplicated old man Vidalis's heavy Greek accent which I found hilarious.

I happened to be chewing on one of her big fat jugs at the moment as she was telling me the story in between gasps and giggles. Debra gets ticklish when I chew for awhile and then start to lick.

Anyway.

The old man was right, there was a problem.

It seemed that it was all the way up when she walked into the room, no problem there. Easy for her to tell since he had the robe on backwards and it was sticking straight out.

"It was about this long!" Debra held her hands about a foot apart.

That made that song about the sandwich shop pop right into my head.

"Jesus! That scrawny little guy has a dong like that?" I was surprised to say the least.

"Yep! No kidding!" She laughed.

Debra told me that she had barely gotten sat down, then the thing went off before she could even get her rubber glove on and she ended up with stuff all over the front of her smock.

"About 8 blasts in a row!" She giggled. "Hell, I had to duck or he might have drowned me!"

I damn near died laughing at that one, and it got worse when she told me she had advised him to play with it a couple of times before trying to have sex.

Then he told her he really didn't like doing that himself, so maybe she could give him a little hand?

Of course Debra refused that.

Ethics, I guess.

Anyway, old man Vidalis is at least 80 years old, his wife is about the same age and has to be over 300 pounds! That stuck me as funny, too.

That was when Debra told me it wasn't the wife that was causing his concern.

It was his 24 year old rather overly endowed redheaded sales clerk!

Like I said, I know about a lot of things.

+++

So Debra telling me about Rachel's problem was no big deal, she knows I am pretty good at keeping my mouth shut.

Somehow all the funny talk set me off and I had a hell of a lot of fun that night as I demonstrated my "special" technique that I had to "cure" problems that women had.

Debs giggled when I told her to send all of her female clients with sex problems my way and I would fix them right up!

Not that I had any idea at all what to do about that, it was just a hell of a lot of fun to use the barest tip of my tongue to tease her until she was squirming around trying to shove her big fat lips against my mouth, which I kept right on moving out of the way.

I was doing my very best to be imaginative that time.

Debra started to act a little bit energetic!

Funny thing is that I looked up and her nipples had flattened out until they were as big around as the bottom of a wine bottle. I thought nipples always got hard when women got turned on, but I guess not always.

A man is never too old to learn something.

I also noticed Debra's beaver looked like it was turning inside out, and her fat button was poking out like I never saw before. I wrapped my lips around that thing, it popped into my head that maybe this is what it is like to be gay?

Which got me to giggling. Which got her to bouncing around?

Interesting.

The thing was as big as the end of my thumb, so I rolled my lips sideways back and forth on it and sucked a little bit.

Then I started humming.

Suddenly Debra's body went off and she soaked my face, now that I had never seen before either, it was like she turned a damned fire hose on me.

She lay there on her back, twitching and jerking, trembling like she was cold or something but she sure as hell didn't feel cold?

I reached out and ran my finger up over her sloppy beaver, she came right off the bed and tried to scoot up the wall to get away from me.

Holy shit did she go overly sensitive!

It took damn near a half hour before I could touch her, amazing.

Then she told me she had never felt anything like that in her entire life, which made me feel kind of good to be honest.

Next thing I knew she was on her hands and knees between my legs and she got her nose all the way to my pubic hair. After the top of my own head went sailing, I looked down and was grateful to see my dick was still there.

Now I don't know how to explain things like that, it just happened.

+++

Anyway, back to Rachel. I was trimming the borders of my lawn, sticking each little tuft of grass into a brown paper sack. I was using Deb's sewing scissors, those really worked neat.

I doubt that Debs even noticed, she never sews anything.

Probably best she doesn't know about the scissors, though.

I looked up and saw Rachel come out, since she and Nathan rent the house that is on the lot at an angle to ours so it's almost an every day thing.

There is no point in them trying to win the best yard contest, their yard is in the back, ours faces the front.

This time she was all fixed up, usually her hair was all over the place and she had on faded blue jeans and a sweater.

The day was warmer than normal, damn near 60 degrees out, rare for the coast in early October.

Rachel had on a pair of tiny white shorts and a white tube top. I could see a shiny little ring in her navel, and her nipples made round shadows in the top. One inch farther down and they would be peeking over the upper edge, that was obvious.

Makeup, too.

"You look nice today, Rachel." I told her, doing my very best to not stare at her tits.

"Thank you. Wow, your yard is really looking good, I bet you win this year." She smiled, striking what appeared to me to be a pose.

Damn, those shorts were small!

I nodded, fat chance of that what with the Mayor and his full crew.

I had even considered sneaking over there in the middle of the night with a bottle of Roundup but I thought better of that.

I could see that something was on her mind, but I figured it was best to just let her get to it.

"I was talking to your wife about some things." She sounded hesitant. My ears perked up.

"Oh? Like what?" I answered, checking out the distance to my front door.

"I have some...personal issues, so I went to the clinic."

"I see. Well, I am sure that Debra will be happy to try and help you." I said.

"She did. It was...female things, and she was telling me about you.. Oh, God. I don't know how to ask this."

I sat up. Now what in the hell did Debra go yapping about to her this time? I took a deep breath.

"I can't have..pleasure..you know? Climaxes?"

"Oh. I...uhhh...see. Uhhh..Have you tried talking to your husband about that?"

"Yes. Then he tries but...." Her face was bright red now.

"Maybe Debra can....?" It was my turn to blush.

"No. I need someone to teach him...us..what works."

"Teach?" I really had no idea at all what to say, this wasn't something I ever expected.

I mean, come on! Talking to another man's wife about her sexual issues was not exactly something I was comfortable with.

"I couldn't. I am no Doctor. I would have no idea how to teach Nathan...?" I managed.

Hell, I couldn't even teach Nathan how to fish. The vision of Nathan with that fish clamped down in his fingers flashed into my mind.

Hell, he stuck his fingers right in there, the thing chomped down and refused to let go.

I think it even growled.

It's big old cheeks were puffed out as it chomped down, lord that was funny!

I managed to stifle a giggle at the thought, trying to keep a straight face.

"What was that, Rachel?" She had said something.

"I said, maybe just...me then?"

I looked at her, no idea of what to say.

"Just you, what?" I asked, finally.

"Will you?"

"Will I what?" I asked again. It began to dawn on me what she was saying.

"Show me what it is that you do, that makes your wife...You know, like she described?" Now she was seriously blushing, I saw her bite her lower lip.

"Honey...I...I mean, I couldn't do something like that, Rachel. I am married!"

The conversation went downhill a bit from there, Rachel ended up with tears in her eyes, blubbering that she was afraid that Nathan would leave her because she was frozen.

"You mean...uhh..frigid, I think." I said, realizing far too late what I just said.

That didn't help one bit.

Rachel turned and took off running, she crossed the yard and jumped over the low fence, went inside.

I sighed and went back to my yard work.

Just wait until Debra gets home, I thought.

+++

It wasn't really a fight, Debra and I had never had one but it got damned close.

I calmed down when she explained that all she had mentioned to Rachel was that she and I had experienced a wonderful session, and it was caused by bringing new things into the bedroom.

Of course Rachel wanted to know what kind of new things.

Women do talk about more than soap operas, I guess.

She had told Rachel some of it, then suggested she perhaps try and tell Nathan exactly what she needed.

Rachel had said that she had no idea what she needed, Nathan was the only man she had ever been with.

That was when the mistake was made. Debra had told her that this could be a problem, her body needed to be taught, conditioned. She just lacked the experience that comes with some practice.

"It sometimes is helpful for a woman to experience other partners early on, it can help them to relax and just let things happen when they finally do settle on a regular mate." She told her.

"You mean a man who knows what to do? Like... Danny?" Rachel had asked her.

"Well, Dan surely could I suppose, but what you really need is to teach Nathan what to do. How about I send the two of you to a sex therapist?" Debra advised her.

Of course that meant spend money and they didn't have any. Her husband Nathan might be the head Chef at the fancy new place but that title didn't pay much.

No medical benefits, either.

Our rather heavy discussion was settled, I thought I understood what had happened. It was just a naive young housewife.

Grasping at straws, the "straw" being the 68 year old half bald guy from next door? Grandpa with an undeserved reputation?

"Will you?" She had asked me.

Lord.

I could just envision me, 68 years old going over to see my next door neighbor's wife to "teach" her about having sex?

Me with a wife at home?

Her with a hubby at work?

Yea, that would work REAL good!

Now if someone had even told me about anything like that happening, my being asked just like that, I would not have even believed them.

+++

"I told you I still have what it takes, babe." I told Debra that night as she sat cross legged by my side, rubbing my back.

I had just gotten done having fun with her on the chubby side body, now it was my turn.

Of course that progressed to her rubbing my butt, then her fingers were tickling my balls and it wasn't long before I was exercising some of my sexual prowess.

It was nice, but not like that time a couple of weeks earlier. I knew keeping up with a session like that would mean saving up some energy, the truth is that my back still hurt from that one.

"You could, you know." Debra said.

"Could what?" I asked.

"Teach her." She said.

"Teach who? Oh! What? You can't mean that, you want me to go screw my neighbor's wife?"

"No, not that. But you could..teach her about oral sex maybe?"

"You are kidding me!" I sat up.

"No, I'm not. She is hurting, we don't have any specialists at all down here, the closest is in Portland. Besides, those two kids don't have a dime between them, they are just starting out."

"Great. You want me go mess with some guy's wife because they can't afford to hire a professional?"

"Danny, it isn't like that. These kinds of issues can destroy a marriage, sex therapists deal with surrogates all the time. It's not a big deal."

"I am not a surrogate, I am married to you!"

"I know, but I am a Doctor, I don't look at it that way." She said, a mildly sad tone in her voice.

"You are just a Nurse." I teased, trying to change the subject.

"So help me, I am going to go back to school just to get you to stop saying that!" Debra took a fake poke at my shoulder, hopped up and went to the bathroom.

I lay there thinking, listening to her in the shower. She was humming as she washed herself, I knew I had given her a nice time. Then my mind drifted to Rachel.

Hell, even if I did try something like that, what happened if she still couldn't feel it? Until I met Debra, all I knew was a few women in my early years, a long period with a wife that I was completely faithful to, and Debra.

Oh, sure, there was a couple of things I did when I was in the Navy, but that's none of your business.

+++

Sure, I have fantasies, like the story I wrote about meeting two sweet young things out on the jetty fishing, picking them up and then getting laid six ways to Christmas.

Like sure that happened. What really happened that time is I did see the two cute little things, they really were wearing just some skimpy bikinis. I even walked back towards my car with them, the one gal turned her back to peel off her top and pull on a T-shirt, glancing my way with a smirk.

Of course she knew damn good and well I was getting a kick out of that, she was having fun teasing an old grandpa. They wanted a ride into town and I obliged, one of them asked if she could "borrow" some money so I handed her a ten dollar bill.

What the hell, they were skinny and looked hungry, besides, they looked nice in those tiny little suits.

Then they waved and off they went.

I drove home that day, cleaned my fish and ate them. Later in the bathroom I enjoyed the memory of the one gal's naked back, and the way their round fannies looked in those tiny outfits.

The truth is that most young girls have no interest in us Grandpa types, they prefer the young and virile boys.

Of course if they understood that us old farts know where some things are and how they work, and we also have pretty good self control?

A few might change their minds.

Anyway, all the rest of that story was just a fantasy, but this one was real!

Rachel was one fine looking female, no way in hell was she even 25 years old yet.

Yet she had actually asked white haired old ME to "teach" her about sex?

I lay there thinking about that, then I was thinking of the way her nipples showed through that top she had on and next it hit me I had a woodie from just thinking about it. That's on the rare side, me getting it up that fast after just getting it up. Nobody rubbing it, either, I was just thinking.

Debra popped out of the bathroom, took one look and knew.

"What are you thinking about, honey?" She gave me a knowing grin, reaching back to rub her bare ass with the towel.

She was facing me, her big tits swinging back and forth as she tugged on the towel. Since we got married she has dropped about 20 pounds, I kind of think I know why, too.

So that was just plain deliberate!

The way she was doing that, wiggling her behind across the towel reminded me of the time I was in Indonesia, this gal was up on stage naked, she had a sash and was rubbing it back and forth across her ass, her legs spread right in front of me and...

Well. You get the picture.

"I was just thinking about how good you look!" I said, sitting up and reaching for her.

"You are going to get me all yukky!" Debs giggled but she didn't really resist much.

"We have more hot water." I told her.

Later, after she got cleaned up from me getting her all yukky, she came in and plopped down on the bed.

"You were thinking about Rachel, weren't you?" She asked, rubbing my poor limp dick.

"No."

"Liar!" She giggled.

+++

The next day I looked out the window to see three old ladies and some guy looking at my yard. The guy was also taking pictures, so I was out there in a flash.

"Hi, Dan!" The one woman smiled at me. It was the Mayor's wife Marie, of course she was on the selection committee.

Of course.

I had seen her around town from time to time, nice looking woman about 50 or so.

I kept a perfectly straight face.

We chatted, they raved for awhile about how good my yard looked. Then they had me pose in front of my efforts and snapped several more pictures.

They wandered on down the street, so I went back inside. I was sipping on some coffee, thinking about how it was unfair as hell to have the Mayor's wife on the fucking yard contest committee.

OK. I was pouting, so what?

My doorbell rang. I answered it, there stood Rachel.

"Can I talk to you? Please?" She asked.

"Uhh..sure." I let her in, against my better judgment.

"Like some Coffee?" I asked her.

"Sure, that sounds good." She answered, looking around.

"Wow, Debra sure does keep a neat house." She said.

I didn't answer. Debra is best described as messy, left to her own devices every flat surface in our place would have piles of things on top of them. I am the one that puts everything away and keeps it all organized.

I even do all the laundry but I will deny that if you ever tell anyone.

I handed Rachel a cup, then sat down, motioning her to a chair.

"Danny, I wanted to tell you I am sorry about what I said." She managed.

"That's no problem." I told her.

"I know I made you nervous, normally I am not so...forward. But it's just that Nathan and I..." Her voice trailed off as she looked down.

"Honey, relations between a married couple is a learning curve, it takes time. You two need to get to know each other, communicate, you know?"

"I guess so. It's so frustrating. It's just that you are always so nice. Then when your wife was telling me about you...THAT? She had a look in her eyes, I saw that and I wanted to be able to....feel like that." Rachel was starting to visibly relax now.

Debra? I felt a little twinge of pride, it's hard not to when a man finds out his wife has been bragging about him.

"Anyway, I'm sorry if I upset you, Nathan and I talked for a long time and he told me that maybe if you were willing, it could...help?"

"You and Nathan...talked about that?" That surprised me.

"Yes. He said that maybe if I ever did have...one of those, then after that it would be easier. It might help make me as fast as he is, that way...Nathan really does love me, he told me he will do anything to make me happy."

"Your husband just needs to keep trying, some women take longer I think. He has to figure out what excites you. You said he is...uhhh...fast?"

"Nathan tries but he...it is over in just a minute or so." Rachel's face was bright pink now.

"Oh. That might be it, maybe you just need more....time?"

"Yes, I think you are right. Well, thank you for the Coffee, I better get home." Rachel smiled at me and went to the door.

"Danny, if you ever change your mind about..you know...helping me? Just let me know. I really like you and feel comfortable, I think it might work?" Then she was gone.