Window Shopping

Emily leaned back in her chair, kicking the front legs up as she sipped cabernet, the deep purple wine clinging to her lips. "You seeing anybody yet?"

I rolled my eyes and poured myself. "No, Em, I haven't got time for that."

"It's been six months. Don't you think it's about time you made time."

"You know how my job is. I've got three projects going right now, and we're bidding on the new library."

Emily leaned forward and plucked a Gitane from the cobalt blue box. It was like her to smoke a strong, foreign cigarette. She wasn't the kind of girl who'd smoke something so prosaic as a Marlboro or Winston. She drove a Peugeot that cost her a metric ton to maintain, drank Chilean wines and wore silk dresses when flannel was chic among lesbians. Her neighboring apartment was a temple of books, which probably explained why she had lived there throughout and beyond two serious but failed relationships. Her books outweighed the baggage. Perhaps that's why I'd stayed as well, or simple inertia. I slid the last of our dinner dishes into the dishwasher, while bitching mildly about unreasonable deadlines in between sips of wine.

"Gary, you are always facing deadlines. Don't let work become an excuse. I know she hurt you, but it's time."

"And who would I date?"

Emily turned her eyes away, taking a long puff from her cigarette, letting the smoke hang in the air. "Whomever you want."

I pulled the cork from the bottle, and refilled our glasses. "And what about you, Em? I haven't heard much giggling from your bedroom lately."

"You can hear?" She turned around, mouth open and face slightly flushed. "I didn't think I was that noisy."

"Fear not. There's concrete block between our apartments. It's intended as a firewall, but it does a decent job of blocking sound.

Emily smiled wanly. "I'm glad. Still, I was relieved when you replaced that old box spring."

I winced. The damned thing was loud, but I didn't think the noise would transmit through concrete block and drywall."Don't be so serious, I'm just teasing. Have you met that new girl in 42-C?" she asked, now grinning mischievously. "She's awful cute."

"The one across the courtyard?"

"Yes."

"I ran into her once in the laundry room, but no, we haven't really met. Even though I can see right into her apartment."

"Really? Get any shows?"

"Pervert!"

"Like you're better. All guys like to look."

"Em, when I sit at that window I'm normally working on a CAD drawing. Yes, I can see but I don't peek. What's up, are you interested in her?"

"A little," she said taking another puff from her cigarette. She looked away again before adding.

"Usually when you say that you're very interested."

"Alright, she's really cute. But she's probably straight."

I poured myself a bit more wine so I wouldn't have to say anything.

"You should go to the party next weekend," Emily suggested. "I could introduce you."

"You know her?"

"We've met, in the laundry room. Only I was folding my unmentionables so we had a chance to chat. Her name is Lisa, and she's a techie."

"Was she checking out your undies, Em?"

"Maybe a little. I have some pretty interesting stuff." Then she winked at me.

That was one of those places I didn't want to go. Emily often teased me sexually, and more often lately now that we both were between relationships. I enjoyed it but preferred to suppress that fantasy. Emily was far too tempting. She was pretty. Tall and slim with long red hair and flashing blue eyes. And she was so feminine, so atypical of the lesbian stereotype. Adding our friendship and her known interest in other women made for a dangerously seductive package. I dared not think about Emily sexually, because I knew what would happen. You start out with a few harmless fantasies, but sooner or later they turn into the drunken pass or unwelcome hints. Pop goes the friendship. I didn't want to become one of those men, so I refused any hint of delusion. Better to think of her as the sister I never had and leave matters there. "Well, she has some pretty interesting stuff too." I added.

Emily raised her right eyebrow. "So she did give you a show?"

"She hangs her clothes up on the porch to dry."

"Sun-dried clothing is the best way to go. But usually you don't hang your unmentionables out there, at least the good stuff. Women reserve viewing for special moments with someone special."

"Unless you're living with them."

"Well, small apartments do challenge the feminine mystique. No space for a boudoir."

"I didn't think you did such things."

"You'd be surprised at what I do, Gary. You really would."

I smiled at her and saw that pensive look in her face, that I'd seen a lot of lately. And then her face lit up as she grinned at me again. "Well, Em, I've got to get back to my drawings. Deadline tomorrow, you know."

She grinned and sipped her wine, before rising. "I think the reason they gave you your computer is to get more work out of you. I know that's why they gave me my laptop."

I laughed. "Everyone knows that's true, we just don't want to admit it. At least they let us put video games on our home machines."

"So you've been shooting zombies all this time, instead of working.

"If I don't get this drawing done, I'll be turned into a zombie!"

"Well, I'd hate to see that happen. Green is not your color." As she opened my door to leave she reached back to touch my hand in parting. She grinned and her fingers slipped away, grazing gently across my skin. After the door clicked shut I lifted my hand for a second wondering, for she'd never touched me like that before.

There seemed no point worrying about what Em was doing. I spotted my copy of Scene. It took a moment to scan the personals. Lots of single women. This one I liked but wouldn't likeme, that one I didn't like. No one looked likely. I tossed the paper aside and headed formy bedroom, where the computer waited. Two clicks brought the ceiling plan up on my screen. I needed to check the lighting levels before handing the plan over to the engineer for the circuit diagrams.

As I worked my mind drifted back to Emily. Had she really been able to hear Theresa and I together in bed? It hardly seemed possible, and she knew our mattress squeaked from when she visited. But if they had, what would they have thought? Would they have been repulsed, like the stereotypical lesbian? I wondered about that. Mary had never been particularly friendly to me. Emily once told me she was jealous of our friendship.

Rubbing my chin, I turned to look outside my window. There stood Lisa in her bedroom, backlit from her hallway light. She was clad only in a black slip and earrings, and the sheer fabric clung to her petite body. Her nipples were plainly visible beneath the fabric and I wondered if she was preparing herself for a lover. She was so pretty, and I felt my cock stirring as I looked. So I turned away and lay on the bed to give her privacy.

Yet she was lovely, I realized, and hungered again for a woman's touch. I looked back at the wall that divided Emily's bedroom from mine. What if she had heard us together? Would our passion have inspired Em and Mary to make love? Theresa and I had made so many memories in this bed. I remembered Theresa's black hair splayed across the pillow, mouth open as I drove myself into her. I reached down to unzip my jeans, and raised my hips to slip them down. My cock sprang free, standing upright before me as I licked my fingers before taking it in my hand. So many images filled my mind. Theresa beneath me, her legs wrapped around my hips, her arms about me, whispering lewdly into my ear. And as I did that I imagined Emily and Mary in the next room, listening to our bed springs and Theresa's soft cries of passion.

I pictured them kissing open-mouthed, and tall, voluptuous Mary feeding her enormous breasts into Emily's small mouth. In my fantasy she wore an enormous dildo, and Emily spread her legs to receive it. I wrapped my fist about my cock and began to pump it, slowly at first, to savor the sweet sensations. My other hand cupped my balls and began to roll them gently as my hips writhed upon my bed.

I tried to strip that image from my mind, and instead tried to picture myself with Lisa. I remember that she had a sharp, mischievous grin from our meeting in the laundry room. I pictured her now, erect nipples poking through black satin, her slip up above her waist, legs spread wide for my thrusts. She smiled at me as I pounded her. And then her picture dissolved and only Emily lay beneath me, her long red tresses spayed out on the pillow. I licked her soft pink lips as I kissed her, my cock deep inside her. Her body was tense and breasts bounced, and she asked me to fill her. And with her image in my mind I came with a groan, feeling the warm liquid spread out upon my belly.

* * *

I awoke in the darkness, pants still down around my knees. I slid them all the way off and went to get a bathrobe. The deadline loomed before me. Back to work I went, checking the drawings one last time before sending them off to the office for printing. I heard laughter from across the courtyard, and glanced across. A neatly dressed man, tall and bearded sat upon Lisa's couch. And she was talking to him as she lowered the Venetian blinds, sealing off her world from mine.

Relieved, I walked to the kitchen to make coffee. I thought of Emily touching me again, and became angry at my weakness. Angry at myself for dreaming of Theresa again, when she was gone forever. Angry because I had intruded into Lisa's privacy. I decided that I should work with my blinds down in the future, though that had never been my habit. And then I wondered why, when all I needed to do was keep my mind on my work. And so I went back to work, never noticing when the lights went dark in Lisa's bedroom.

* * *

The party was a Luau theme, so I dug an old Hawaiian shirt out my closet and some khaki shorts. I heard the door open and Emily came in, wearing a floral print dress and grumbling "Where's your coconut bra," I asked, lightheartedly.

"Coconut bra? I'm not big enough to fill one of those."

"You don't need whoppers to fill a coconut."

"True, they do bulge on their own. But it's hard finding a grass skirt in this town. Would you zip me?"

"Sure." I leaned over and noticed that she wasn't wearing any bra, much less coconuts. I noticed how smooth her skin was as my finger closed over the zipper.

"Thanks." She whirled about to face me. "Get your drawings done?"

"I had to stay up all night to finish, but yes, I got done. Thank God it's Saturday, and I don't have anything to do until tomorrow night."

"Good, because we're both going to get leighed tonight."

"You got somebody in mind?"

"Maybe, but I was talking about the flowers, silly. But then you might get lucky. I plan on formally introducing you and Lisa tonight."

"I wouldn't hope much there. She had a gentleman caller last night."

"Oh did she?" Though she mouthed the words, I had a feeling that Emily didn't think that was a bad thing. Which surprised me, because I thought she might be interested in Lisa herself." She reached out and pulled me after her. "Now come on, I've got an appointment with a roasted pig, and we don't want to be late." And so I followed her down to the patio. We chatted with our neighbors. I decided to head over to the punch bowl, to check it for alcohol content. It wasn't, which reminded me again that my college days were over, though they did have a keg of cold beer to remind me of my youthful folly. I filled my glass and wandered over by the poolside, where I found Emily and Lisa chatting.

Em grabbed my hand and pulled me over to them. "You have got to meet Gary. Gary this is Lisa," she added pushing her smaller hand in mine.

She squeezed my hand again, grinning up at me. "We've met," she continued, "though no one ever told me your name before. I've seen you out my window, always staring at your computer screen. Are you one of those chat room addicts."

"No, I'm an architect. It's just that this is the busy season for us, and my boss's last name is Legree."

Lisa smiled at me, that sort of upturned Cheshire grin that give you an idea that you don't know the half of what's going on inside her head. "Sounds like we have the same boss. I'm a network admin, have to work a lot of odd hours. Fortunately they haven't made to many changes in the system lately, so I've actually got it working right for once."

"If you can get it working, you ought to come to my shop. Our server is always crashing."

"That's bad, very bad. But let's not talk about computers shall we? I've had enough work for this lifetime." And we began to chat about work our college days, and whether or not John Cusack had gone Hollywood. Emily slipped away while we spoke, and after she left Lisa's next question surprised me. "So how long have you two been going out?"

"Em and I are just friends."

"Really? I was sure you two had something going."

"She's my best friend."

"You mean you're not interested in her."

"No, she's not interested in me. She's gay."

"Oh." Lisa turned her eyes to watch Emily from across the pool. "Are you certain?"

"In the six years I've known her, she's had two live-in girlfriends and not one date with a man."

"And what about you? What team do you play for?"

"Excuse me."

"It isn't exactly usual for a lesbian to hang out with a straight guy."

"Emily's not exactly ordinary."

"No she isn't. But who wants to be ordinary?"

"Not me."

"Me either. Do you like to dance."

"Sure." And so she took me out on the dance floor and we began to sway and bump with the music. She moved gracefully, like a panther in perfect time with the beat. Near her I felt clumsy but she didn't seem to notice. She was beautiful and totally female, and my mind and body couldn't help but notice. It felt good, like Theresa hadn't taken my mojo after all. And then I caught sight of Emily in the corner of my eye. She was watching us, but instead of the grin I expected her eyes looked sad, her mouth downcast. So I smiled and waived her over. And as I motioned to her, that wonderful smile reappeared.

And so we danced, and rested, then danced some more, growing closer all the time. Lisa and Emily seemed to hit it off, and I could see Lisa batting her eyes flirtatiously at Emily. And then at me. I was confused, and a little bit high, so I really didn't understand at the time. But we were having fun, and I enjoyed both their company.

Finally I sat down and watched them dance together. Their eyes stayed upon each other as they swayed to the music. And then a slow song began, and they parted, gesturing to me. I caught Emily's eye she took my hand and put it in Lisa's. "Dance for me," and stepped aside as our bodies came together.

I put my arm around her and Lisa stepped toward me, her head fitting nicely against my shoulder and my right hand fell naturally to rest upon her short black curls. I rested my head upon hers as we swayed together. I could feel my breasts against my belly, and her thighs against my hips. Lisa wrapped her arms around me and held me close as I savored the pressure of her body against mine. But as we danced I searched the crowd and found Emily standing there watching us intently. Her mouth was open and she stood quietly, though she smiled when she spotted me looking at her.

"You two are so blind."

I looked down and saw Lisa smiling before returning her face to my chest. I could feel her body against mine, and I responded in a way that was unmistakable. And I found myself wanting to kiss her very badly, but instead contented myself with stroking her hair and neck.

The song ended and she stepped away from me. "You need to give the last dance to Emily," she told me and slipped from my arms. She reached for Emily, and pulled my friend on the dance floor, whispering something in her ear. And then Emily stepped into my arms.

Emily's hair glistened in the moonlight and I noticed again how moist her eyes, were, how soft her long, straight hair. And then I realized I had never held her like this before, or noticed the curve of her back, the firmness of the muscles beneath my fingers. And I could feel her breasts against my chest, her nipples through thin fabric of her dress. I looked straight at her and she returned the gaze directly. She was beautiful, not model beautiful, but everything seemed to fit. She felt warm and soft in my arms. And then my cock began to swell. I panicked a bit. What if she noticed? Surely she'd be offended. So I pulled back so she wouldn't notice my desire. But she wrapped her arm around my hips and pulled me tight against her body. My erection rubbed against her thigh, no way she could miss it. "Oh my," she whispered as I felt her body press against my erection.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, ashamed and yet enjoying the touch of her soft hair, the pressure of her body against mine.

"You're a guy. You can't help yourself." But she did no move away but continued to press herself against me, body swaying to the music. My skin tingled from the delicious friction. On a whim I relaxed and let myself press against her, daring for a moment to dream that she felt as me. My best friend was next to me, so beautiful and feminine. As we danced a single tear slipped from the corner of my eye.

The last song ended and she pulled away from me. She reached out one long finger and wiped the water from my face. We looked around, but Lisa had already gone. So we turned and climbed the stairs upward toward my apartment. "Would you like to come in for a drink?" I offered, hoping she would accept. And she stood silent for a second with pursed lips, and then smiled and followed me inside.

I reached for the lights but I felt her hand close over mine. "Leave them off," she whispered. "It's a beautiful night, let's enjoy the darkness for a bit. Sit down on the porch and I'll pour us some iced tea." I didn't complain, just slid open the door and stepped outside into the night air. Across the patio I could see into Lisa's apartment. The lights were on low, though she was nowhere in sight. Which was fine by me. And then I heard a rustling and Emily stepped on the porch with me. Handing me a tall cool glass. I lifted it to my lips and drank deeply, letting the tea roll over my tongue.

The light snapped on in Lisa's bedroom, and she stepped into the room, clad in a terrycloth robe. I could hear Emily lighting a cigarette to my right, and smelled the acrid smoke floating by. It seemed for a moment that Lisa saw it too, for she looked right at us. But she made no move to lower her blinds, but turned down the bed and began fluffing her pillows.

"You know she kissed me when we went to the ladies room," Emily announced, taking a long drag.

"Really. How was it?"

"Sweet. She has wonderfully soft lips."

"So how come you're not with her?"

But Emily just took another drag and said nothing. Lisa closed the closet door, revealing a full length mirror. I could see Em's cigarette glowing in the reflection. And then Lisa sat down and began rummaging through her bedside table. She turned and seemed to smile at us as she found what she wanted. Emily and I both caught our breath when she held up a large double-ended dildo up before laying it upon her bed.

"We should go inside, Em."

"No. She knows we're here. She can see the glow of my cigarette. I think she wants us to watch."

"Her room is lit."

"I tell you she knows."

I stood paralyzed as Lisa pulled a small bottle of oil from her drawer and set it upon the table. And then she stood before the mirror, studying her image and then let her robe tumble upon the floor. Her breasts were wide and close together, crowned with small berry nipples. We watched as she traced her right hand over her belly and up to cup her left breast. My cock began to throb.