This story was submitted under Valentine's Day Story Contest 2017.
This story builds up slow then goes on with its pace. So if you are in for a shag then this is definitely not your story.
This is my first story so pardon me for the mistakes.
Don't forget to vote and comment.
I woke up again, panting. This has become a routine. Sleep was far away from my eyes, so there was no point in going back to it. So I decided to make something to eat.
I made my way into the kitchen, wishing that it weren't empty. But it has been empty since that accident. Two years back my family, which solely consisted of me and my mother, met with an accident on our way back from the grocery store. A thing that has haunted me since then, because I was the one driving. The shock written on her face was a sight I want to forget. The scream was deafening.
She was a fighter though. She always told me that I was worth fighting for. She kept smiling, telling me that everything was going to be alright, till she took her last breath.
The funeral was simple and plain. Only the ones who knew my mom from her work and some of her relatives came to see her depart. My aunt Allie came to see her too. She hugged me between the pile of tears. She said that she felt sorry for not being there in her last time. I accepted her condolences with a smile even though my insides were churning, trying to settle with the fact that my mother was not with me anymore. Aunt Allie also asked me to come live with her till I completed my high school, but I refused her politely.
This is when it all started. I wasn't able to sleep that night or the night after that. Every time I closed my eyes, I would see my mother calling for me, but the more I got close to her, the more she faded away. This would terrify me to my wit and I would end up in a pile of screaming dummy. This went on for a year. I kept having those nightmares. Nightmares of her drifting away from me. The affect was obvious. She was my life. She was the one who raised me on her own when my father died in war. She was my family and she was the one who taught me what love was. That is why losing her made me have those horrid dreams. I thought that it will go away after some time. But eventually it became a part of me.
Then I started seeing her, doing her daily course as if she was alive. I could feel her presence close to me. She'd drift past me as if air, then disappear into the darkness. A month later she started talking to me. She would come to me in the morning, singing her favourite song in my ears, waking me up. I knew that it was just my mind playing games with me, but it all felt so genuine, so good. Whatever it was I didn't want it to end.
Losing my mom shocked me to my shell, but losing her all over again every night in my dreams drove me further into the dread. I went from my previous jovial self to a silent person. Many of my friends tried to console me but I just ignored them straight away. I wanted to be isolated and that's what I did to myself, shrivelling up into my shell I just went on with my life. I broke up with my girlfriend as that would have been so unfair to her, me self loathing about myself and she trying to talk me out of it.
High school was like that for me after my mother's death. I never got out of my dread until my aunt Allie found out about my state. Her daughter Sarah was in my class so it was obvious that I may be the topic of some of the evening reports. She came home and confronted me about it and that was the first time after mom's death that I broke down. I told her everything from those nightmares to the presence I feel. I kept talking and she kept nodding, listening attentively. At last she got up, kissing my head she asked me to see a psychiatrist. I nodded dumbly.
"I am going to give you her address. She is a friend of mine. You opened up to me that means you can easily open up to her."
I took the card from her and got up to fix her some coffee. After having coffee I walked her to the door to see her off.
"Give Sarah my regards and thank her for spying on me," I smiled.
"Will do. I am also going to ask her to hook you up with some of her friends so you don't die of loneliness," she teased.
I made a face making her raise her hands in surrender position. She came forward and hugged me.
"Try making friends with Melissa. She is just like you. Even if you are her patient she will try and flirt with you. That's her. So don't get wierded out okay?"
I just nodded, not wanting to talk about it. She understood and made her way to her car. I watched as she made a turn and went out of sight.
I sighed as I felt my mom patting my shoulder. "You should listen to her."
"What if she comes to know about you? That I can see you?"
She caressed my cheek and I leaned in her palm.
"You don't have to tell her. If she comes to know then It's okay. If this is good for you then I insist that you should do it," she said smiling lovingly.
"Okay mom. I will see her tomorrow."
I was standing outside the house of the psychiatrist I was supposed to see. Melissa Ravenport was her name. Aunt Allie told me to see her at her place as she thought that Melissa was family. Not that I wanted some special consideration. In fact I wasn't too keen to meet a psychiatrist.
I rang the doorbell and heard small footsteps approaching. I was greeted by a little girl which I thought was Melissa's daughter.
"Yes?" she said poking her head out.
"I'm here to see Melissa Ravenport. Is she here?"
"Is my mom in trouble? Are you going to arrest her?" she looked at me questioningly.
"Uh..no! Why would I arrest her?"
"Ana! Who are you talking to?" came another voice from inside the house.
"Mom! There is a man on the door who is not going to arrest you," she said turning around and dabbing her way inside.
A little later Melissa came out wearing sweatshirt and pjs. Her face and body was denying the fact that she was a senior psychiatrist and had a daughter. Her golden blonde hair were tied in a neat bun and her face looked like she was still in her twenties. Her eyes having a deep blue shade added a decent amount of beauty to her face. Her lips were curled up in a smile which I found hard to understand.
Melissa cleared her throat bringing me back from my thoughts. Maybe I was staring too long that's why she was smiling like that.
"You must be Allen. Come on in."
As I entered her house a sweet and strong aroma of pancakes thundered my nose. I stood just inside the door unmoved as I was too lost in that wonderful smell.
She chuckled. "Oh! That must be my pancakes. Ana loves them," she said making a gesture for me to sit on the couch laying in the living room.
"Me too," I breathed, looking over at my mother who standing by the vase near the door.
"What?" Melissa asked.
I looked over there again. Mom just smiled and faded away. "Oh! Nothing. They smell delicious."
She smiled. "They taste delicious too. Just give me five minutes to collect my things and then we can begin our session. But first we will have some of those pancakes. If you promise me that you are going to behave the I can spare you some cakes too." There was softness in her eyes which indicated that she was just teasing.
"And can you keep an eye on Ana for me? See if she steals some of those pancakes before I serve them," she said pointing at her daughter who was sitting on the dining table, drawing something in her sketchbook. I smiled and nodded in agreement.
"Not much of a talker huh?"
"I just thought that nodding would be more convenient."
"It is, but it's good to let the words out sometimes. Don't worry we'll see to it. Because in these sessions you are the one who is going to talk."
"Good. Just give me five minutes," she said as she turned around and hopped upstairs. My eyes involuntarily went to her bubbly butt which bounced as she hopped the stairs. I went to the dining table and pulled a chair near Ana.
"She knows that I'm not going to steal the pancakes," Ana said never taking her eyes off the sketchbook.
"Then why did she asked me to guard them from you?"
"I don't know, but she always does that," she said still not looking.
"Maybe she wants to steal them," I said trying to make her look at me.
She stopped and looked at me, putting her pencil away.
"I mean if I was you, I would definitely try to steal them. That's the fun part of it," I said excitedly.
"How can you say so?" she asked innocently.
"Because I know so. I always used to steal some of the pancakes every time my mom made them. She would intentionally keep it somewhere I can easily reach," I said almost lost in those memories.
"Your mother's pancakes were delicious?" she asked again.
"Very delicious. Nothing can be compared to them. They were just.......magical," I said as a single tear trickled down my eye.
I quickly dabbed it away as I heard Melissa's footsteps approaching us.
"What are you two talking about?" asked Melissa.
"Mister Allen was telling me how he used to steal pancakes when his mother made them," Ana said.
"Were you encouraging this young lady to steal?" Melissa glared at me.
"No! I was just pointing her the fun part of having pancakes," I said in my defence.
"Well yeah. Stealing them when mom is not looking is indeed fun. I used to do the same."
"Then why did you asked Mister Allen took stop me from doing so?" Ana interrupted.
"Maybe I wanted you to steal them my sweet girl. I don't want you to miss out on the fun part of it," Melissa explained her daughter lovingly.
"Mister Allen was saying the same," Ana said smiling at me.
Melissa kissed Ana's cheeks and went to the kitchen. She came back with two plates filled with heart shaped pancakes. She went back to get three glasses of milk and after placing them on the table she sat across the table, facing Ana and me. Ana wasted no time and attacked the pancakes placed before her.
"Don't forget the milk," Melissa said. Ana showed her disgust by making a face.
"That face is not going to spare you. You have to finish the glass," she said sternly.
"Ofay Mom," Ana said with her mouth stuffed with pancakes. That earned a chuckle from her mother. I too smiled at her cuteness.
"Funny little thing she is. Almost a pain in the ass."
"No. Kids are always like that. I was much more of a nuisance for my mom." I winced at her reference. Melissa saw that and I was very grateful of her for not asking further questions. Sensing my discomfort she tried to divert the conversation.
"So, I hear you have done your high school with good grades. Allie never stops talking about you. She and her minx of a daughter adore you."
"Yeah they have been pretty close. Sarah spied on me and told her mother that there was something wrong with me. So here I am, sitting in front of you because of my aunt."
"Do you really think that you are sitting here because of your aunt?"
I looked up from my plate and saw her giving me a smile I didn't recognize. It was starting to make me uncomfortable. I started fidgeting in my seat.
"I'm sorry. I think we should discuss this later. Please enjoy the pancakes," she said noticing my discomfort.
I nodded and went on finishing what was served in my plate.
I was sitting in Melissa's office. It looked just like a typical psychiatrist office with all those books related to human behaviour and psychology. The room reflected her life pretty well, like the toys spread all over the room reflected that she was a mother of a wonderful and sweet girl.
A little later Melissa came into the room and I saw that she has changed herself in her professional outfit. She was wearing a black coat on a creamy white shirt going with black pencil skirt. The skirt seemed to be a tad tight hugging her figure, giving me an eyeful view of her waist. I quickly looked away, not wanting to be thrown out of the house for ogling her.
She sat down in her chair and smiled at me. Somehow I found her smile intoxicating. My eyes travelled lower and saw that she has opened the first few buttons of her shirt and just a hint of her cleavage was visible to me. I dragged my focus back on her face as she started speaking.
"So, Allen McAllister. Tell me why are you here?" she asked sweetly, still smiling.
"Because I am abnormal?"
She laughed and said, "You are not abnormal. But from what I hear from your aunt, you are just...quiet. That's all. So we need to work on that."
I nodded. And she went silent for a few minutes. I thought that she was thinking of something. All the time she was looking at me.
"You know Allen. When I said that we were going work on that, it means you are the one who has to do the talking, not me."
I sighed and started speaking. I told her about my mom. How much she mattered to me, and how I can't sleep at night because of the nightmares. I skipped the part in which I can see my mother and feel her presence as that would have freaked her out. At least that's what I thought.
"Is that it?" she asked.
I looked over her head and mom was standing behind her, just smiling. I nodded.
"Are you sure?" she asked, not believing me.
"Yes, that's it."
"Well then I see no problem here. You just need to socialise. Talk to people who matter to you and are willing to listen. Meet new people. Make friends. Isolation can be a good remedy, but sometimes it swallows you up, until there is no getting back. That's what has happened to you."
"Okay," I said having nothing to say.
"Can I ask you a question Allen?"
"Do you see your mother? Feel her presence? She talks to you, doesn't she?"
I was shocked. I didn't knew that she could read me like an open book. My eyes instinctively went to my mother who was standing behind Melissa.
Melissa turned her head and looked in the direction I was looking. Mom was gone.
"You know you should have been honest with me," she said looking back at me, her voice stern. "How can I help you if you won't tell me the truth."
"I didn't want you to think that I'm a freak," I mutter.
"Allen, what you are facing right now is perfectly normal, after what happened to you. The trauma of losing someone is pretty heavy. And I think you know it already. It doesn't makes you a freak."
"Then what does it makes me?" I asked, shuddering at the thought.
She leaned forward and touched my hand. "It's okay Allen. I understand," she said looking at me with compassion in her eyes.
I nodded and she withdrew her hand. I could still feel the warmth of her hand, the softness.
"Okay enough of this serious talk. Let's talk fun. Tell me Mr. Allen McAllister do you have a girlfriend?"
"What?! Why?" she said not believing me. "I mean how's that even possible. You are handsome, strong and you have that most charming smile. How come you don't have a girlfriend?"
"I uh....had a girlfriend. But we broke up," I stammered, taken aback by the sudden turn in the conversation.
"Let me guess, you were the one who initiated that breakup," she said looking me dead in the eye. I nodded.
She said nothing, just sighed and slumped back in her chair. "May I ask why?"
"I didn't wanted to make her suffer. She was rather sweet, trying to console me. But I just couldn't connect to her. It was too difficult at that time," I explained.
"Yeah I know. It's harder when the one you lost is as close as your mother."
"Ever thought about to start dating again?" she asked.
"No. Not yet at least."
"So that means that you are available?" she said with a mischievous grin on her face.
"Perfect! Then I'll give you about....." she glanced at her wall clock. It read half past twelve. "Eight hours to get ready and be presentable. Go home, get some sleep, refresh a bit, wear your best suit and pick me up at eight. We are going out tonight. It's a date!"
"What?! But I don't know you. And we've just met..." I stumbled through my words.
"Hello Allen. I am Melissa Ravenport. Now what else is there for you to know?"
"What? You don't like me. Am I that old to be seen around you?" she said with a pout.
"No! You are...Beautiful!" I said feeling the loss of words.
"Okay then it's settled," she said getting up from her chair. Coming around her study table she took my arm and pulled me out of the office. We found Ana playing with her Barbie doll, dressing it up in tiny costumes. I smiled at her.
"Isn't she the sweet one?" she said.
"Yeah she is. I can see where she gets her sweetness from."
"Oh you are getting better at this. Now I know that I have done nothing wrong in asking you out," she said fanning herself.
I just smiled looked at her for a second, admiring her beauty.
"You are indeed beautiful," I said.
"Keep on saying things like that and you may get a kiss at the end of our date."
My eyes widened at her comment. "On the cheek," she said swatting me on my shoulder.
I rubbed where she hit me then settled down on the couch nearby. She went into the kitchen and came back with two cups of coffee. Handing me one of the cups she sat down next to me.
"Tell me about you Allen. What are you going to do? Are you going to apply for college?" she asked, savouring the coffee.
"I have applied for some of the courses in the nearby universities. Transportation would be a lot easier," I replied.
"What are you interested in?"
"Advanced sciences," I said.
"Wow! That's great. And according what your aunt has told me about your grades, you are going to excel in your field."
I nodded then grew silent. We both finished our coffee in that silence.
Setting my cup in the side stand I got up to leave.
"Ana! Mister Allen is leaving," she said looking at her daughter.
"Bye Mister Allen," Ana said in sweetest of voices.
I crouched down beside her and kissed her forehead. She beamed a teethy smile at me and got back to dressing her Barbie.
Melissa followed me to the door. "See you tonight Allen. And don't you dare back out on our date. I'm looking forward to it. Don't make me wait," she said smiling sweetly. Her eyes were dancing as she giggled watching my confused face. It made my heart skip a beat.
She leaned forward, hugging me. He generous breasts squashed into my chest. She stepped back and waved as I made my way to my car. I was smiling as I drove back to my house.
"I like her," mom said. She was sitting in the passenger seat. I adjust the rear view mirror to see her.
"Really?" I asked.
She just nodded and faded away, her words echoing in my ears. "Don't lose her."
We both were sitting in a small restaurant in the decent parts of the city. She was wearing a silk top and plain jeans which hugged her figure perfectly. She had her hair fall down to her shoulder cascading all the way to her back. She was looking exquisitely beautiful with her hair loose. I picked her up from her house at eight. She was pretty impressed with my punctuality, knowing nothing about my eagerness to go out with her. It took me nearly an hour deciding what to wear, but in the end I settled with Monkey wash jeans and T- shirt.
I was dumbstruck when I saw her with her hair loose and the jeans she was wearing. I never knew that any woman can have such an effect on me. Her being ten years older than me had something to do with it. She invited me in and asked me to wait for a bit. She came back with Ana and another teenage girl beside him.
"Allen, this is Emma, she's going to babysit Ana tonight while we are out. Not that she needs babysitting, but she's gonna do it anyway," she said bending down and kissing Ana on her cheeks. "Be good to Emma okay?"