You

Dedication and Thank you:

To my dear friend Gipsy Keket, thank you for the wonderful names you came up with and for your always being there for me, and; being a creative inspiration to me always. You are a great friend and inspiration. I love ya girl!

It was a Sunday morning and it had begun to rain when I heard these words: "You," he said, "are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain." Julian said as he quoted the book, The Asylum For Wayward Victorian Girls by Emilie Autumn.

I just looked at him not knowing what to say. How does he know anything about me we only just met; yet, he did seem to know me. That being the case he probably knew that I wanted to rip his clothes off and have my way with him right there. I just need to keep my cool and not let it show. How do I do that, I was never good at hiding myself from people; I wear my heart on my sleeve and everyone seems to know what I am feeling before I do.

"I'm sorry, I did not mean to analyze you. It is just a hazard of being a psych major." He laughed sweetly.

My breath caught and I smiled up at him. I shrugged and he held a hand out to me. I shook it and felt a chill run through my body. His skin was soft like he had known little work but I liked the way his hand felt in mine. "My name is," I hesitated because I hated my name and all the variations that went with it. "My name is Mas." He gave me a questioning look and I went on to explain. "My name is Thomas. I hate my name and all variations of it. I was also named after a man I despise."

"Ah, I understand." He said his voice soft and smooth. "It really is nice to meet you Mas." He smiled, it was bright and happy and I could not help but smile back at him. "Would you like to have lunch?"

What was I supposed to say, no and be rude? If I said yes I seemed eager and easy. What the hell was I supposed to do? "Sure I'll go." I smiled and he smiled back at me. Goddess help me I am easy.

"Great. How about The Chowder House down by the bay?"

I nodded my head afraid to speak to him, afraid he would know more about me in the few words I spoke than I even knew about myself. It was scary to have someone see into you like they were living your life. I shivered at the thought and we began walking towards the small intimate restaurant.

We were seated and I was looking out at the bay when his voice broke into my thoughts.

"Would you like some wine?"

"Sure, thank you."

"Does white work for you? Or would you like something else?"

"White is fine."

The waitress arrived and Julian ordered the wine and some appetizers for them. I just watched as Julian interacted with the waitress. He was indeed sexy and I found myself thinking that he was probably an animal in bed and I felt my body react. "Fuck!" I thought and sipped at my lemon water. I didn't need water I needed a cold fucking shower.

"So tell me about yourself."

The inevitable question, I hated talking about myself. I smiled and pretended. "I was named after my grandfather who is a murdering prick. He murdered 5 girls in his life time and..." I paused.

"Wow. Why were you named after him then?"

"So that maybe I would not turn out like him, well that is what I've always been told. It makes no sense to me but whatever. My mother is dead and my father is never around. He is a very selfish man that only thinks about himself. He drinks way too much and I moved out as soon as I was old enough."

He just nodded his head. He was analyzing me again and I hated that but that was the hazards of being a psych major I guessed. "How old are you if you don't mind me asking?"

"29." I replied my voice more even and calm now. I hate talking about my grandfather and my father.

"Do you have any siblings?"

"No." Was all I said and left it at that, I knew he could tell I was not being totally truthful with him but I didn't care at the moment. I didn't have any living siblings so I wasn't exactly lying but I wasn't exactly telling the truth either.

"Do you have a girlfriend or a boyfriend or..." he paused seeing the blush creep into my face.

"No, I am painfully single." I said and the blush in my face grew deeper. "I would love to find that right person but I am starting to wonder if that is ever going to happen."

"What are you looking for?"

"You" I thought to myself. "I don't know, someone sweet, kind, and someone who loves me for me. It tends to turn people off to find out my Grandfather was a serial killer." There was no change of expression on Julian's face when I confessed that my Grandfather was a serial killer. I mean I had said that he had killed 5 people but I never said more than that. Still he did not flinch. "Hmm, I wonder what he is thinking?"

"I'm not turned off..." Julian replied and reached for my hand.

My heart jumped and my mouth went dry, I didn't know what to say. I bit my lip and wanted to take his hand into mine. "I...I just want you to know that I..."

"You like men, I know."

I laughed to myself and a big part of me relaxed and I felt his hand press down onto my hand and I turned my hand over in his hand and he traced a finger down the palm of my hand.

The waitress came with the wine and took our orders but we hardly noticed that she was there we were so wrapped up in each other after that moment.

"I don't think I am very hungry." I confessed.

Julian smiled, "I know how you feel. Would you like to get our food to go?" I nodded my head and when the waitress walked by Julian flagged her down and asked to have our orders to go. She did not look happy but I didn't care. Julian threw some money down on the table and then handed the waitress a very large tip and a smile returned to her face and a few minutes later she returned with our food bagged and ready to go.

"Are you ready?" Julian asked. I nodded and flowed him out of the restaurant hand in hand.

We walked back to Julian's apartment and went inside. We entered and he shut the door and stared into my eyes for a long moment before pushing me up against the door and kissing me. He didn't ask and I didn't care I returned the kiss and wrapped my arms around him. My breath began coming in sharp intakes of breath and I dropped my head back as he kissed my neck. "Julian..." I moaned softly. "Please don't stop..." I begged and he let his hands wander my body.

Clothes were torn off and tossed to the floor. I wanted to touch him but I was afraid that if I did he would disappear into thin air; but my desire won out and I reached out and traced a finger down his smooth chest. "Take me to bed." I whispered and followed as he led the way into the bedroom. Pulling me back into his arms as he laid me down on the bed and began caressing my skin. His hands were indeed soft and I loved the way they felt against me.

Covering me with his body he reached for the nightstand and took out a condom and lube. I smiled but did not speak. I knew he was asking permission by the look in his eyes and I just wrapped a hand around the back of his neck and pulled him in kissing him deeply passionately. "Fuck me," I finally whispered as I took the condom from him and tore the foil wrapper open and reached between us and rolled it down over his hard cock.

I was so overwhelmed with anticipation that I could hardly breath and my breaths came in the form of a shallow pant. I needed Julian; I need to feel him inside of me. With an easy push I felt him slide inside of me and I moaned. With ease his body moved in a steady needful motion and I wrapped my legs around his waist. "Oh, goddess, this man is making me feel so good." I thought and moaned again as I felt my cock throbbing against him.

I reached between us and stroked my cock I needed to feel more. "Oh, goddess!" I growled in his ear and he thrust harder and deeper into me. "You are making me feel so good."

With a quick roll Julian had me on top of him. I repositioned myself and began riding him hard and fast trying to fill the need that had been growing since I met him in the park. I was so close. I cried out his name and my head fell back as I came hard. My body shuddered and shook with pleasure. Tears welled in my eyes and I didn't know why but the intensity of my orgasm blew my mind; I had felt nothing like it before.

I felt Julian's body tense and he gripped my hips as he pushed up hard into me and came. He looked into my eyes and smiled at me and I came again. I collapsed against him and began kissing his neck then moving to his lips. "Mmm, I love this. I could get used to this...but if this is just a one time thing I understand."

"Do you want it to be more than a one time thing?" Julian asked.

I didn't need to think about it but I stopped and pretended to think for a minute and then said, "I think I would like that. I could really fall for you if given half a chance." I said and began kissing him again.

"I could fall for you too." Julian smiled up at me before laying me down on the bed and slipping off to get cleaned up. He brought back a washcloth and cleaned me up and we lay in bed talking. "Hold me until I fall asleep?"

"I can do that." He nodded and kissed the top of my head and pulled me tight against his body.