Became a widower at fifty after twenty-five years of marriage of which I was faithful. Her illness was incurable and quite painful. I suffered with her and mourned her loss. Found out she had multiple affairs two years three months after her death. Now I realise she got what was coming to her. Fuck her. Even after a few years I still have bitterness towards her. It seems that the whole time together was just a big lie. Someday I might come to terms with it but for now I just trudge on, hating. 12/6/2015 Update Aug '18 It's been almost 10 years since the death of my wife. I don't hate as much. I've tried to block out the 25 years we were married so I don't remember. Dumped all friends who were aware but didn't hurt them. No reason now. I don't comment as much but I read old tales which are satisfying to my need for revenge. Will try to write but I don't know. | 
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