Redneck, Nerd, Dreamer... Call me what you will. I won't apologize for growing up in the rural areas of the South. I say "y'all," "yes ma'am," "naw," and "sir." I hunt, fish, hike, and "make stuff." By "make stuff," I mean I'm sort of a redneck absent-minded inventor. When I was young I would take my father's power tools apart, of course, to see what made them "tick." However, I was blessed with the ability to put them back together, and even improve them a bit... Naturally my dad would get pissed upon discovering his precious radial-arm saw laying here and there on the shop floor; but, I'd avoid the slight sting of his belt by reassembling the contraption. "It doesn't do that annoying 'wiggle' thing anymore!" he would say. Frowning in concentration, he'd cast a look at me and ask, "Know anything about automotive brake calipers?" Of course my answer was always, "Nope, but I will if you get me some wrenches, screwdrivers, etc..." It's a wonder I've survived as long as I have. I built a potato gun a long time ago, which, as per my M.O., graduated into cannons. Actual, though crude, cannons. You know, pyrodex, metal tube, various projectiles, sparks, flames, explosions... Almost shot my neighbors' house once, luckily I used too much powder and my projectile disintegrated before reaching their property. Like I said, it's surprising I'm still intact and breathing. Anyway, I'd like to try my hand at telling stories, particularly those with naughty bits sprinkled amongst my clumsy prose. ;-) Lord knows my imagination has enough material to work with... If I can fight through the ADHD pitfalls and obstacles, I might have some interesting yarns to share; although I'll be needing your help to produce something worth reading. Naked people rock! ~Rolly |
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