Bravely bold Sir Thomas, rode forth from Camelot.
He was not afraid to die, O Brave Sir Thomas.
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways.
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Thomas!
He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken.
To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away,
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Thomas!
His head smashed in and his heart cut out,
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged,
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off,
And his penis...
... Brave Sir Thomas ran away
Bravely ran away away
When danger reared its ugly head,
He bravely turned his tail and fled
Yes Brave Sir Thomas turned about
And gallantly he chickened out
Bravely taking to his feet
He beat a very brave retreat
Bravest of the brave Sir Thomas
Packing it in and packing it up
And sneaking away and buggering off
And chickening out and pissing off home
Yes, bravely he is throwing in the sponge
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