When I am heavily into my sub self I am very bi-curious, but only act those things out with my woman. I enjoy private humiliation as either sub or dom, but I get really turned off by stories that feature violence and contempt, (like so much of macho-male porn). There has to be a sense of loving protection between the actors as they go deeper and reveal more of what they have hidden from themselves.
"Surrender" is my key erotic term: surrender to our own hidden, strange and conflicted desires. Eroticism is surrender to oneself, not to others. Plus, I enjoy the good humor and "laughing at the rules of society" quality of this website! Society's hypocrisy towards sex is like that wonderful children's story: "The Emperor's New Clothes". All I can say is: "The emperor is naked. Let's fuck him every way we can!"
PS I highly recommend "The Erotic Mind" by Jack Morin. It is not negatively psychological and is very very liberating.
Location
southwest