Why

"Oh, so you want to know why? Well fine, here is the whole screwed up story!"

. . .

She got out of her car and I knew it was her. She matched her description to a 'T'. She was even a few minutes early, which is a serious plus in my book. Fashionably late might work for a party, but not a date.

"Hi!"

"Hi!" She said with just a touch of shyness. I smiled and held my arm out. She took it and we went into the club for dinner.

Blind dates are always risky, but Internet blind dates are the worst. You meet over a bunch of bits and bytes and try to establish a connection to the person at the other end of the network wire. It's not as easy as it looks. Sometimes you can smell a bullshit artist, but often you can't. Some of the clues include no picture posted, or all the pictures have the same background/outfit. An immediate call for sex, or sexual information, is also a dead give-away. I mean in this day-and-age, who is willing to jump into bed with someone they don't know? Only a lunatic, or someone already infected with various medical problems.

Of course there are other concerns when you enter chat rooms and Internet dating sites. Who knows if the person on the other end of the network cable is the person they are pretending to be. A friend of mine has a saying "Get drunk and be somebody!" She used it for people who seemed to need alcohol to unwind and develop a personality. I see the Internet as a way for too many people to 'be the person they always wanted to be." I mean if your life sucks, or even if it just seems to suck, you can create a whole new person on the 'net. You can change height, weight, hair, eyes, even gender. Although I will never understand why old men pretend to be young girls! What kind of thrill is that?

There are also problems with illegal hookups, as a local police department seems to know on a regular basis. I swear once a week another guy trying to connect with a minor, boy or girl, got sucked in on a sting operation. Really pathetic and I hope they enjoy their jail stay.

But like any medium of communication, it is possible for two people, who may have never chanced to met in any other way, to connect.

Her handle was TRINA, followed by a 5 digit number. The number was what first caught my eye. It matched a zip code very close to mine that is if it was a zip code, TRINA might be a neighbor. Now that was interesting. As I pulled up her profile, I thought about the possibilities. There were so many people in chat that sooner or later you would find somebody close to you. The odds might not favor it, but it could happen. Could she be someone I know from work or school? That would be a riot, but if she sounds familiar, should I talk to her? My own profile contained a picture of me, so if she recognizes me, she might back away. Is it important if anyone knows I wander the chat rooms of Yahoo? Naw, it's a hobby nothing more. The room we were both in was a regional room, not a sex room, so there is no worry about being here. Her profile came up and her number certainly was a zip code, from not very far away.

What was striking was the photograph! She wasn't young, but she was younger than me, maybe by 5 or 6 years, a blonde with a good smile. She had a face that spoke of experience, not a lifetime of beauty parlors and playing kissy-cheek with other women. She was gorgeous! But not is a conventional way, like the twenty-something girls try to create artificially. Her still photo spoke of a life of doing rather than watching. She had a light sunburn, and laugh crinkles around her eyes. A superb face! The rest of her profile supported my mental image; she liked activity rather than passivity. Liked motorcycles and movies, camping and even liked working. I bet her job is a physical one! Maybe a nurse, but not a schoolteacher! She looked good, and the profile sounded promising. I took the plunge and sent:

"HI"

After a minute, she responded "HI NEIGHBOR"

She looked at my profile! Good deal.

From that tenuous beginning, we chatted and found a connection. We liked many of the same things, but even here we didn't intersect, we would talk about our differences from an exploratory rather than picky point of view. The poor lass had never tried Guinness! Well someday perhaps! She did like Chili, but wasn't into super spicy, and she smoked occasionally. Well no one was perfect. But she enjoyed trading humorous stories and had a very pointed sense of humor. By the same token, I wasn't into motorcycles, even Harleys, so I guess I wouldn't be perfect in her book either.

Actually despite our differences, we did find comfort in chatting together a bit several times a week. I smiled just seeing her online and we got to know each other as well as you can online. We also traded phone numbers after while and spent several nights talking on the phone while we shared our day with each other. We were both moving in a slowly choreographed dance, that sooner or later we knew we would meet, but we weren't pushing each other. Things progressed over weeks and we did manage to find a good time and location between our two homes to meet. A small sports bar. Nothing too loud on a Thursday night, but it seemed a good place to start.

My heartbeat jumped as the red car pulled into the lot, it wasn't quite the red I had pictured, but when the blonde hair came out, I knew it was her. The picture certainly didn't do her justice. As she got out of her car, she moved like a dancer. Her work involved her hands and her head; she managed a bunch of blue collar metal workers. It could have made her coarse, but instead it brought out her intelligence. The physical part of her work kept her in good shape and it showed as she turned and her hair flew around in a tight circle. She looked around and our eyes met. She looked down and smiled even more sweetly than I could imagine. She didn't meet my eyes again until she got closer and I used our simple tagline that we used to start each chat room conversation, "Hi, gorgeous!"

She didn't give her usual reply, but when she took my arm I could feel the electricity. We got a small booth and proceeded to talk about nothing and everything. Some of the things we shared we hadn't mentioned online, other things were familiar. I learned so much more about her and so many personal things about her child, her past relationships. She learned about my wife and her passing, and my daughters. Halfway through dessert, we were both listening to the music coming from another part of the bar and she took my hand, then we kissed.

The kiss took just a second, or did it take an hour. I can't remember! I was surprised at feeling her lips on mine, but her taste was like nothing I had ever tasted. Without realizing it I opened my lips and her sharp tongue tasted me even deeper, but so quickly. Then she retreated shyly. After that, we stayed body to body in the booth, frequent short kisses and small caresses. We had some drinks, but we weren't drunk in any way. We had gotten very comfortable with each other and more secure in the idea of 'us'.

She fit so nicely within the circle of my arm, and when she turned toward me, she was so easy to kiss. Her perfume was subtle, as was the shampoo scent of her hair. She laid her head on my shoulder and we sat there for a long while just enjoying the togetherness. It was an amazing night for me!

We left the club, hand in hand, and the plan was to go our separate ways, but neither of us were ready to be parted. Common sense took over and I escorted her to her car. As she got in it, she told me to get in.

She pulled us just around the parking lot, toward the back and into the shadows. When she pulled me to her, I was shocked, but in a wonderful way. We were both thinking the same exact thing, but the question of place was a problem. We were both single parents and had kids and sitters at home. Well I had kids old enough to look after themselves, but I wasn't going to bring her to my home this late to spend the night.

In darkness of the parking lot, I felt her body for the first time. Her skin was smooth and so sensitive. No matter where I touched, it caused a small reaction in her. Her breasts felt heavy and her nipples so sensitive. Her jeans disappeared like magic and I tasted her like i was enjoying a fine vintage wine. She was delightful and delicious!

We made mad love in her car, parking brakes, small seats, cramped quarters not withstanding, we came together several times and by the time the club was closing found ourselves sated and dressed again. She kept my shirt, leaving me my tee-shirt. She also gave me her panties, telling me that if she ever saw them hanging on my rear view mirror she would never forgive me. We parted with one last kiss and an implied promise and I drove home with lightness in my heart that had been missing for a long time.

My daughters were still up, but after taking one look at me, they just smiled at me and left off the normal teasing questions and comments. I think they were happy for me and went off to bed with nothing more than a smile, a hug, and a kiss.

I couldn't sleep, so I turned on my computer and to my surprise found a message from her. In anticipation I opened it up and received the single biggest surprise of my life.

TRINA: "You SOB, I sat in that fucking parking lot for an hour and you couldn't have even called me! I hope you had a good laugh! I have never been so foolish as to fall for your online retarded games in my life. You are an ASSHOLE and I will not rest until everyone in the regional chat room knows it."

OMG, I met . . . who did I meet?

And now you know why I don't do chat rooms anymore, because my name is fucking mud all over the Internet. You also now know why I spend every night sitting in my car at this little sports bar hoping to get a glimpse of a car that was not quite the right shade of red..