The Way You Walk

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133 words
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Belegon
Belegon
124 Followers

The way you walk
Strutting in confidence
You must be aware
Of the chaos you cause

Every time I see you
I know you feel it
My lustful gaze
Is so filled with force
I have no idea
How you hide the bruises

I want so badly
To reach out and touch
But I’m so afraid
The illusion will vanish
And you’ll disappear
Back into my dreams

Each day that passes
The tensions build
So that little liberties
Are no longer enough

The risks I take
Will become much greater
The moments we share
So more fraught with peril
And as danger grows
The excitement will also

A stolen glimpse
Pale pink against white
Will feed my lust
Sinful touching moments
Threaten now as minutes
The pain is exquisite

Temptation
Anticipation
Resignation
Release

Belegon
Belegon
124 Followers
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5 Comments
LilDarlinLilDarlinover 19 years ago
Tease~

I loved this one. It's just a lil tease, as she is to you. The flow was great and the imagery..Spottt on~~!! It could use a lil work to bring it full bloom, but still a great poem. Full of emotion an temptation~~

More Please~~

Maria2394Maria2394over 19 years ago
you lost me

at "lustful gaze" ahh, Bele, you are a MUCH better writer than that!!! please, find something crisper for that part, okay?

annaswirlsannaswirlsover 19 years ago
~

The first two stanzas are super, I like the rest but they lost the power for me. I think they could be trimmed down as the intensity of the poem should increase, I think that making the poem more and more "quick" cutting words phrases lines will bring that home. Thanks for this! A nice read to start the day.

jd4georgejd4georgeover 19 years ago
I like the juxtaposition...

...of lust and bruises, especially in light of the tender tone of the speaker. Unfortunately, because I did find myself intrigued by that, I found myself wanting a bit more of that.

There are some wonderful phrases in this. Push the tenderness/bruises a little more and you'll have an emotionally more powerful piece.

ferociouskittycatferociouskittycatover 19 years ago
Oooo Loved it!!

'I don't know how you wear the bruises'

Great description!!! >^..^<

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